


I swear I know your face (but I don't know who you are)

by ManuKaikan



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Clarke Griffin, F/F, Fine Stud Lexa, Rough Sex, Secret Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-11
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-08-30 09:17:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 123,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8527567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ManuKaikan/pseuds/ManuKaikan
Summary: Alexandria Woods has always had everything she wanted. So, when one evening she meets the beautiful artist Clarke Griffin at a party, Lexa want her immediately but Clarke does not seem interested. They actually met six years before and they are married but it seems like Lexa does not remember this.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Clexa FanFiction. I'm from Italy so this is a translation of my Italian fanfiction, I have a beta that corrects my mistakes (bless her) so sorry for my english :) 
> 
> Now enjoy it!

** Prologue **

  
  


“Marry me.”  
  
Clarke Griffin turned with a raised eyebrow, directing her attention towards the person who was sitting at one of the tables.  
  
“I'm sorry... what?”  
  
The rain poured violently onto the silver car parked infront of the café. Clarke looked at the woman who had spoken, her hair and shirt were wet; her face was lit up by the lights.  
  
The water sparkled in her brown hair and on the wet shirt she wore, the local neon lights lit up her face, for a moment Clarke was struck by her beauty.  
  
Such a beautiful girl …  
  
For a moment, just one moment, she fantasized about how her savior had arrived to free her, but with her luck, it was probably just someone who was making fun of her.  
  
Clarke gave her a suspicious look.  
  
“So?”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Will you marry me?” she asked again.  
  
There was a long moment of silence.  
  
“Today is Thursday?”  
  
“Friday.” the woman said.  
  
“I'm sorry, I only get married to strangers only Thursdays.” Clarke said filling her cup with coffee. “I'm afraid that will have to wait until next week.”  
  
“Next week will be too late.” The woman stared at her for a long time, eyes lingering towards her breasts, then her legs and then returned to her face. “What the hell has happened to your hair?” she asked.  
  
“That's none of your business.” she said, “And I like it.” she pointed running her hand through her Red hair.  
  
The woman was a stranger, why the hell would she care what she thought about her hair?  
  
“Drink your coffee, we close in twenty minutes.”  
  
The fact that it was almost midnight reminded Clarke of her most important problems, like the fact she had to find another apartment. No matter how many double shifts she did, she had struggled to find one place that she could afford, not with her salary. She was starting to think about moving, maybe to Los Angeles, or to ask for help from a few friends. It would of been easier if she had more than twenty-seven dollars in her bank account.  
  
“You're perfect.” the woman said, “I have an offer for you.”  
  
Clarke rolled her eyes: she would have bet her mother that she had a proposal for her, but she wasn't sure it was something she would like. “Look, my feet hurt me, I haven't finished my shift yet and before I can go home I have to clean the kitchen, so if you don't mind ...”  
  
“Be quiet and listen to me. How old are you?”  
  
“You're a very persistent person.” Clarke said. “I'm not sure if I like it.”  
  
“Evreyone tells me. Now, how old are you?”  
  
Clarke looked at her with curiously: she was a charming woman and from the clothes she wore and the car parked outside - it was definitely her car - probably very rich, spoiled and used to getting everything she wanted.  
  
“Twenty ... five.”  
  
The woman chuckled. “Nice try, sweetheart.”  
  
“Twenty-one.” Clarke muttered.  
  
“I'm sure that sooner or later you'll say the right one.”  
  
“Okay, okay.” Clarke snorted. “Nineteen.”  
  
“Legal.”  
  
Clarke saw the woman coming toward her and she jumped back, immediately slamming against the counter. It was impossible for someone to come at that time, the woman could do whatever she wanted and no one would ever find out; She jumped when she felt hand on the face and saw the woman studying her carefully.  
  
Clarke was lost in her green eyes.  
  
“Perfect.” the woman said grabbing her chin and turned her face from side to side.  
  
“I'll give you ten seconds to take your hands off me or I'll call the police. What the hell do you want from me?”  
  
“I want you to marry me tonight. We go to Las Vegas, get married and I bring you back for the next round.”  
  
Clarke's eyes widened. “You're crazy!”  
  
“I'm desperate.” she said.  
  
“Who's not?" Clarke asked, moving away from her touch and taking a few steps away from the counter. “Why me?”  
  
Clarke wondered; what was a woman like her doing in a place like this: It was certainly not a place for a rich person. Red vinyl seats, beige tables with cigarette burns on top, old Christmas decorations left on their own, the smell of food everywhere.  
  
“I'll be fast.” she continued. “Mine is a business proposal, the situation is this; my father and his brother owned a company, my father died ten years ago and left everything to my uncle Titus with one condition when he was no longer able to work, half would become mine.” she explained quickly. “I worked like crazy over the years, instead my cousin Gustus, Titus' son, he did nothing, nothing but travelling around Europe. Fifty percent of this company is mine, I worked for it. Now Titus wants to retire but he has decided that I have to marry someone and Gustus as well otherwise he will sell his part of the company to someone else.”  
  
Clarke was more and more confused then ever. “Really?” she asked, moreso to fill the silence than to show interest.  
  
Why would someone force another person to unwillingly marry?  
  
“Unfortunately, yes. Not only that but the first one to marry will take majority of the company.”  
  
“What's the problem? A beautiful and rich woman like you must have millions of women and I presume, men to choose from.”  
  
“I asked a girl, but she decided to say yes to my cousin instead.”  
  
Clarke raised an eyebrow. “Well... but surely there must be some-”  
  
“They will get married in San Francisco tomorrow, I need to do it before.” she interrupted. “I can assure you that our marriage will bring benefits to both. What I want in return is only a marriage contract, I don't want a real wife, I only need one on paper. Immediately. Tonight.”  
  
The woman stepped forward and Clarke made one step back. She looked into her eyes and then she read her name, with calm and controlled voice.  
  
“Marry me, Mary. I'll give you money each month for your entire life. Hell, I can even buy this place if that's what you want.”

Mary wasn't her name, it was simply the name of the girl who had worked there before her, she had decided not to change it.  
  
“I don't want this crappy diner.” she said.  
  
God, just looking into those green eyes gave her butterflies in her stomach.  
  
“Having this company is everything to me, I imagine that you've longed for something.” she said staring at her. “Do this for me Mary and if one day you want something with all your heart, I will give it to you, you have my word.”  
  
“Anything?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
Clarke took a moment to think. She was curious, this woman; whoever she was was incredibly charming, strong, powerful, rich, and she needed her.  
  
Nobody in the world had ever needed her.  
  
“How do I know you're telling the truth?”  
  
The woman pulled out of her pocket a leather wallet and a cell phone. “This is my lawyer's number: call her and ask who I am and ask her about my uncle's ultimatum.”  
  
Clarke took the business card. It was madness, but in the end what else did she have to lose?  
  
“What's your name?” Clarke asked, writing down the number.  
  
“Alexandria Woods.”  
  
The lawyer replied immediately and she didn't seem happy to be woken up in the middle of the night but she said that Alexandria Woods was telling the truth. The woman asked to speak to Miss Woods and Clarke gave her the phone, grabbing a chair, she sat down for a moment trying to stop the beating in her heart.  
  
She was about to do something crazy; something crazy that would give her great advantages, especially with the situation she was in right now. But she didn't know this woman at all...  
  
“Of course I'm serious.” Lexa said, looking at Clarke. “In a diner in D.C ... why not? I'll send you a copy of the license and I'll be sure to bring the original later.” There was a brief pause. “No, no honeymoon, I will tell her to call you to make arrangements”  
  
There was silence for a few seconds, the lawyer seemed to be quite agitated and Clarke could hear her voice even at distance. She saw Lexa roll her eyes and then let her sign with his hand to get up.  
  
“When you receive the copy call my Uncle. See you at nine, you can hand deliver the license if you insist.” She ended the call and put the phone in her pocket.  
  
“I can't come like thi-”  
  
“Get your coat.” Lexa said throwing a few dollars on the counter.  
  
“I don't have a coat."  
  
Lexa raised an eyebrow. “You have no coat?”  
  
“Hell, is there an echo in here?" Clarke asked amusingly.  
  


Funny, after all, there was absolutely nothing.  
  
She could barely pay her rent and a bit of food, she couldn't even afford the luxury of buying a coat after she ran away from home, she brought with her only a few personal belongings.

  
Lexa looked at her for a long moment, then took off her coat. “Put this on.” she said.  
  
“You're really good at convincing a woman.”  
  
Lexa smiled. “Let's go.”  
  
  


At 9:45 Lexa put the marriage license in the hands of her lawyer.  
  
At 9:46 she ran away and didn't look at Clarke again.  
  
Lexa had not even kissed the bride.

  


  


  



	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to tell you that the FanFiction is already finished in Italian, and I have already translated 7 chapters in English. Since you are all curious to know what happens when they meet again, here!
> 
> But for the next chapter you will have to wait at least a week :) 
> 
> Enjoy!

**Chapter 1**

  
  
Dozens of guests elegantly dressed, filled the large art gallery, drinking champagne andadmiring the paintings on the walls. Clarke Griffin stood in the centre of the hall with her flute between her fingers and watched people with a smile on her lips, realizing that even in her wildest dreams she could not have imagined such an epilogue for her life.  
  
Only six years ago she had been a Nineteen year old with no finances, alone and lost in the big city; now she was watching her big dream coming true.  
  
She jumped when a body squeeze her from behind.  
  
“Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?” He whispered in her ear, before gently kissing her cheek.  
  
“Many times, yes.” Clarke said with a smile.  
  
“I can't help it.” He said, squeezing her even more. “All the eyes are on you, Miss Griffin, but you are only mine”.  
  
Clarke raised the glass to her lips and took a sip of champagne. The boy wasn't wrong: she had seen many of her guests stare at her, congratulate her and try to talk to her.  
  
“Only because my name written on the door, Finn.” she murmured.  
  
Finn raised an eyebrow, and stepped back to get a better look at her. Clarke was beautiful with her red dress, her blond curly hair and light makeup.  
  
“You are a vision, Clarke.” He said. “I'm a very lucky man.”  
  
At those words, her cheeks were painted red, while the embarrassment took possession of her. It was still pretty uncomfortable in receiving that kind of compliments: he knew very well she was very different from the small, frightened girl that Finn had met four years earlier, but still failed to come to terms with the changes that she had been forced to do.  
  
She had been a teenager who took care of herself; alone, working in a diner for very little money to an almost entirely independent woman overnight; all just for signing a piece of paper.  
  
"I finished my champagne." She quickly changed the subject, trying to get back on safe ground, away from the compliments she couldn't handle. “Would you mind...”  
  
Finn smiled, taking the glass from her fingers, before disappearing into the room, leaving her alone again and at the mercy of her thoughts. Clarke made her way into the crowd and stopped in front of one of her favorite paintings, smiling at the memory of how the inspiration had struck her in the middle of the night, leaving her no choice but to get up and grab her brushes until the next morning.  
  
She heard a few footsteps, but she didn't look away from the paintings in front of her. Someone stopped beside her, in contemplation, Clarke was silent, feeling enveloped by a strangely familiar scent.  
  
“There are a lot of paintings on these walls but despite all of this, no one could steal the beauty from the best piece of art in the room... you.”  
  
Clarke stayed silent, completely speechless, she couldn't help but shake her head. “Let me say that this is the worst pick up line I've ever heard.”  
  
She felt a little laugh. “These paintings certainly can not compete with you.” Said the person.  
  
Then Clarke decided it was time to finished that embarrassing conversation, she certainly was not going to let a woman who was bored try and hit on her at her own opening night.  
  
"I am the artist of all these paintings, Clarke Griff-"  
  
When her eyes met those incredibly green eyes, her heart skipped a beat and the words became stuck in her throat.  
  
“I never thought I would have the pleasure of meeting the owner of this wonderful place so quickly." she said, holding out her hand. “Nice to meet you Miss Griffin. Lexa Woods, at your service.”  
  
Clarke stared at the hand for a long moment and then, with a trembling breath, she shook her hand feeling a tight pain in the stomach. She couldn't believe that she had met her wife after six long years.  
  
When Lexa had “kidnapped” her six years ago she was wearing a simple white shirt and black jeans, the look of a young and dangerous woman. In that moment, dresses in her suit she was a queen, Clarke was sure that everyone in the room had their eyes fixed on them for a moment.  
  
“And what brings the famous Miss Woods into my Gallery?”  
  
Lexa stared at her getting lost in those deep blue eyes. She smiled, rubbing her thumb on the hand she had hold of, she wasn't surprised when Clarke retracted her hand quickly back.  
  
“Famous?” Lexa said.  
  
“You can't deny: you fill the newspapers with your economic victories every week, it's hard not to know your name.”  
  
“I'm not here as a business woman.” she said.  
  
“Then why are you here, Miss Woods?” Clarke asked again.  
  
Clarke was curious to know the reason of her presence, fate often played tricks on her, especially since the recent decisions she had taken.  
  
“What can I say, I love art." Lexa shrugged. “And please, call me Lexa. Can I call you Clarke?”  
  
Clarke almost bit her lower lip when she heard Lexa's voice speak her name, the way her tongue flicked on the _K_ sent a shiver down Clarke's back.  
  
“We don't have this kind of confidence, Miss Woods.” Clarke said her last name on purpose, just to let her know that she was not prepared to be impressed so easily.  
  
“Come to dinner with me then.” Lexa said quickly. “So you can get to know me.”  
  
“I don't think that is appropriate.” Clarke said. “For years I have read newspapers with the diary of your life: just with you staying in this very room and talking to me is giving me a reputation I've never had."  
  
“It's not a good thing?” Lexa asked. “You just opened your gallery: now I'm here willing to buy one of your paintings; to help your business.”  
  
"I don't need it.” Clarke muttered, irritated with the thought that Lexa assumed she needed her help. “Now if you'll excuse me ...”  
  
“I want to see you.”  
  
“You're seeing me.” Clarke pointed.  
  
“Without all these people around.” Lexa said. “Dinner or lunch, the choice is yours.”  
  
Clarke smiled and shook her head. “You are really full of yourself, Miss Woods. What makes you think that I'm interested in going out with a woman?”  
  
Lexa licked her lips running her eyes all over Clarke's body. “Let me say ..” she started. “A man wouldn't know what to do with a woman like you. You are too beautiful.”  
  
Clarke felt something move inside of her, for years she had wanted to hear those words come out from those lips.  
  
Before she could answer, she saw Finn make his way through the crowd, with two glasses and his sweet smile. Clarke had never been so happy to see him as at that moment, it would been the perfect excuse run away from the situation because she was sure that Lexa wouldn't let her go so easily.  
  
“Well, it will be weird to hear that, Miss Woods but you're wrong.”  
  
Clarke was pleasantly surprised when she saw the look on Lexa face change for a moment but it was only a second before she stared down Finn.  
  
“Miss Woods, what a surprise to see you here!” Finn said looking surprised. “I thought you were not coming.”  
  
“Collins.” Lexa said less warmly, putting her hand in her pocket. “What can I say, I love art and I wanted to buy a new painting for my apartment.”  
  
Clarke hugged the boy, trying to escape from Lexa's eyes.  
  
“Clarke, this is Alexandria Woods, one of my possible investors, if my proposal will be of interest to her, clearly.”  
  
“Clearly.” Lexa agreed with a small smile.  
  
Finn's company was going badly and the boy was trying to save the family business. He had cut the equipment and paid holidays, but it hadn't worked, so he decided it was time to find investors. Collins' company had always been very important in their area but Finn's father had managed to ruin it.  
  
Then, who could help him? No one better than Alexandria Woods; who seemed to make magic with money?  
  
“Since you have many things to talk about, I think I'll leave you to your business.” Clarke started.  
  
She wouldn't find a better opportunity to escape from that situation, so, she leaned over to kiss Finn and walked away. She could clearly feel Lexa's eyes on her back and almost unconsciously, she started moving her hips with more sensuality than necessary.  
  
She couldn't explain why but the idea that she had all of Lexa's attention made her smile.  
  
  
**  
  
  
Monday morning, Anya Forrest walked down the hall of the Woods Corporation towards the office of her boss, a folder in her hands and a professional look on her face. She had a large number of documents that needed Lexa's signature and Anya wanted to get it as soon as possible. She had many other things to attend before the end of the day.  
  
She knocked on the door but she didn't wait for an answer before entering the room. Immediately she was welcomed by Lexa who invited her to come in, pointing the phone that she had in her fingers. Anya walked to the desk and waited patiently.  
  
“Do you ever wonder why men with an ugly face always manage to win the most beautiful women?” Lexa asked once she put down the phone.  
  
“They have other qualities?” Anya said with a raised eyebrow. “At least I think, as you know, I'm not in that world: the only man in my life is my cat.”  
  
Lexa smiled and shook her head. “It was Finn Collins.” She explained. “I met him on Saturday at the opening night of the art gallery, he needs a sponsor to bring the family agency to glory again.” Anya listened carefully. “I need you to do some background checks before I can make any decision.”  
  
“You want me to look for something in particular?” Anya asked, sitting down on the chair and crossing her legs, she opened the folder ready to hand over the documents.  
  
“Make a thorough check: the amount of debts, if they have pending cases, maybe the budget in recent years."  
  
“How urgent is it?” she asked.  
  
“As soon as possible would be great.”  
  
“I can do it tomorrow morning, today I have to do some work that I left has been on my desk for too long.” Anya informed her. “Which is why I'm here so early, I need your signature on several urgent documents and then I can leave you to your duties.”  
  
Lexa nodded and the woman handed her the documents, then Anya looked at the paper in her lap, trying to appear in her mind what kind of reaction could trigger in Lexa.  
  
"Apart from being hunted by this Finn guy, your words make me presume he looks like an idiot, how was your evening? You got lucky?” She asked genuinely interested.  
  
She was always curious who the lucky girl was to be in Lexa's bed.  
  
“No, at least not in that sense.” Lexa said, leaning on the table to pick up a pen. “But I met the most sensual, intelligent and charming woman I have ever seen.”  
  
Anya raised her eyebrows: it was the first time in a long time that Lexa had spoke this way about someone. She gave Lexa her full attention and waited for her to continue whilst Lexa took her time viewing the rest of the pages.  
  
“Really? Tell me more.”  
  
“She has the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen Anya, I thought about her the hole weekend and her voice is just... charms.” she said, finally raising her eyes to Anya. “And her lips ... God, her lips look like they were painted, which is quite ironic considering she is a painter.”  
  
“I don't think I have ever seen you like this." Anya said, amused. “And you managed to approach her?”  
  
"Yes but it was fleeting. I have never seen any woman put me in my place as she did and despite that it was strangely fulfilling.”  
  
Anya laughed. “Raven has always said that you would fall as soon as a woman had you in her hand, and it seems that she was right.”  
  
Lexa signed all the documents in front of her and gave them to Anya, she opened the top drawer of her desk and pulled out a cheque book.  
  
“It's much more than that: I've never wanted anyone like I want her, Anya.” Lexa said writing something quickly on the cheque. “And the fact that she doesn't want me, makes it all the more interesting.”  
  
Anya rolled her eyes: this was not the first time she had heard those words from her friend. “I have no doubt, like the previous one hundred which you had a crush on.”  
  
Lexa smiled. "I don't think so, I wouldn't have bought a painting for fifty thousand dollars if it was just a crush.”  
  
There was a silence and Anya thought she heard wrong, it was not possible; Lexa spent all that money on a painting.  
  
“What have you done?!” Anya asked shocked.  
  
“She is an artist, the owner of the gallery actually and I bought the painting where we met. Anya the painting is wonderful.” she explained. “You will soon see with your own eyes, I think I may hang it here, in the office, you know, to get some good vibes.” Lexa gave her the check. “In fact, if you could send this cheque that would be great.”  
  
Anya grabbed the piece of paper and stared at it, the recipient was not there and she looked Lexa. “What name shall I write on the check?”  
  
“Clarke Griffin.”  
  
_**Oh shit.  
  
**_ Immediately Anya's hands closed over the piece of paper on her lap, hiding it in the folder, away from Lexa eyes. She took the paper from the desk and settled everything in the folder that she was still holding in her hands before standing up with a tight smile.  
  
“I think I'll leave you to your work and please, let me know when you get this wonderful painting. My skin is itching to see what you threw away fifty thousand dollars on.” Anya said a little harsher than she intended.  
  
Before Lexa could even think to answer Anya exited the room and closed the door behind her letting out a deep breath.  
  
It would be a disaster, she could feel it in her bones.  
  
  
**  
  
  
Clarke turned off her phone and put it in her bag: she was meeting her best friend Octavia for lunch and then going to the doctors for Octavia's checkup. Her child was due to be born in a few weeks and Clark could not wait to meet the little girl bringing a little bit of happiness into their lives.  
  
Clarke loved her life, she had a degree in art, an art gallery and she had filed for divorce.  
  
She was sure that Finn would save his company and then... then they could think about their future.

But at that moment the past was knocking on her door.  
  
Lexa was in front of her gallery, impeccably dressed as usual, her arms crossed and completely absorbed in one of her paintings. Clarke thought of turning to leave for a moment, until she realised she was a fool to think that Lexa would leave so quickly.  
  
So she stepped forward, trying to control the beating of her heart, there was no one that could save her this time.  
  
“Miss Woods, have you lost the way to the office?”  
  
Lexa turned at the sound of her voice and smiled. “No, I want to go for a coffee and I thought you might like to join me.”  
  
“I don't drink coffee, I'm sorry." She said, taking the keys from her jacket.  
  
This was not true: Clarke was dependent on coffee, especially those nights she could not sleep and woke just to paint all night long but this wasn't something Lexa had to know.  
  
“If you would excuse me I have a lot of work Miss Woods and I'm pretty sure that your company needs you more than I do." she said pushing the door.  
  
Lexa followed her and looked at the paintings hanging on the walls. They were just wonderful.  
  
“Your paintings are beautiful.” Lexa murmured, “I really appreciate the way you use the colors.”  
  
Clarke turned to her. "You have artistic skills?" she asked with curiosity.  
  
Lexa smiled softly. "I would not call them artistic skills, I'm better with numbers than with a brush." She said. "But I love art and I wouldn't object to having the time to learn how to paint."  
  
Hearing Lexa's words left Clarke speechless, she had not expected an answer like that but she didn't know much about her wife except what she had read in the newspapers.  
  
“Everyone should find time for their passions.” Clarke said. “So if you like the idea of painting, you should find someone who can teach you.”  
  
“Someone like you?” Lexa asked stepping towards her, “Would you be willing to teach me, Miss Griffin?”  
  
Clarke bit her bottom lip, trying to hold her gaze but those incredibly green eyes seemed to dig her.  
  
“I have a lot to do, I couldn't give you the right attention.”  
  
“Everyone should find some time to do what they want, like go to lunch with me.”  
  
Clarke giggled, she knew that if she didn't accept Lexa would undoubtedly be back again and again. Having a coffee together didn't seem like such a bad idea.  
  
“All right.” Clarke finally gave in. “I can't come to lunch with you because, I have things to attend to, but I wouldn't mind some coffee."  
  
Lexa raised an eyebrow. “I thought you didn't drink it.”  
  
Clarke smiled “I can always make an exception.”

  
**

  
This was definitely not the place Lexa had in mind for a coffee but even if she had talked to Clarke Griffin only twice, she understood that she could not decide anything.  
  
So Lexa found herself at the Starbucks located a few blocks away from the gallery, wondering what she could take. She had invited Clarke for a coffee, but if she had to be honest, she couldn't even remember the last time she'd bought her own coffee: it was her assistant who did those kinds of things.  
  
“They don't have Italian coffee.” Lexa murmured, looking at the list behind the counter.  
  
“No.” Clarke said. “But in the other hand they have a chocolate cake that makes me insane and some snacks that make me go crazy.” She continued moving forward in the row.  
  
Lexa folded her arms across her chest. She felt rather out of place: it was a somewhat 'too casual place for her.  
  
“One cappuccino, a piece of chocolate cake, those snacks and one espresso." Clarke said quickly. “Can I have the espresso into a mug?" She asked, handing him the money.  
  
When Lexa finally decided that she wanted a simple espresso, she found the cup in her hand and before she could even think of saying something, Clarke walked away from the line looking for a place. Lexa followed her and took a seat opposite her.  
  
Lexa was silent for a long time, watching the people around her and for the first time in her life she felt terribly out of place.  
  
“You want sugar?” Clarke asked.  
  
Lexa shook her head, looking down at her espresso she stated “I like strong and black.” as she took a sip.  
  
Clarke stared at her intensely, then poured two packets of sugar into her cappuccino and added so much cinnamon that the cream disappeared from view.  
  
“They should call it cinnamon with cappuccino rather than capuccino with cinnamon.” Lexa laughed, raising an eyebrow.  
  
“I like sweet and spicy.” Clarke replied.  
  
Clarke's attention focused on the whole cake and Lexa smiled.  
  
“May I ask what is so special about the cake to get your full attention?” she asked.  
  
“Have you ever tasted it?”  
  
Lexa shook her head.  
  
“You can't live without having a piece.” Clarke protested, cutting off a piece and moving the fork in front of Lexa's face “Open your mouth." she demand, Lexa didn't move and Clarke rolled her eyes. “The chocolate won't kill you.”  
  
“I disagree.” Lexa said. “I'll do it on one condition: let me call you Clarke.”  
  
Clarke licked her lips, she couldn't deny that the idea of hearing Lexa say her name, it made her shiver everytime.  
  
“Okay.” she finally agreed, handing back the fork.  
  
Lexa smiled and she leaned forward, closing her mouth on the metal, looking into Clarke's eyes as she sucked the fork into her mouth. Clarke's heart missed a beat from the sensuality of the gestur, it wasn't what Clarke had expected but she couldn't look away.  
  
“It's delicious.” Lexa agreed looking at her.  
  
Clarke wasn't entirely sure if Lexa was talking about the cake, so she took the fork away from her mouth and smiled.  
  
“Maybe I should leave this slice.” Clarke said with irony.  
  
“You can call me Lexa.” She pointed out running her tongue over her lips to clean them from chocolate.  
  
“You haven't given me permission.” She said.  
  
Lexa chuckled. “You can call me Lexa, if you want.”  
  
Clarke pushed the cake in the middle placed the fork on the plate before adding another clean fork.  
  
“There, we can share.” Clarke said simply.  
  
They ate silently for a few minutes and finally Clarke dropped her fork and took a long sip of her cappuccino.  
  
“You can finish it if you like.”  
  
Lexa shook her head. “It's your favorite, I would never dare.”  
  
“I want to eat something salty.” Clarke responded, opening the snacks.  
  
Lexa was speechless: Clarke had just finished eating half a piece of chocolate cake and now she was enjoying the salt snacks she had purchased.  
  
Embarrassed, Lexa raised her cup, trying to keep herself busy but she found herself coughing when she saw Clarke dip the fries into her cappuccino and she could clearly see the veil of cinnamon on one of them.  
  
“You are the weirdest person I've ever met.” she muttered between coughs.  
  
“Don't tell me you've never tried.” Clarke amused.  
  
Clarke knew it was the truth, it was probably the first time that Lexa ate half slice of cake completely alone.  
  
“Why should I dip the fries into a cappuccino?” Lexa asked with wide eyes.  
  
“Why not?” Clarke replied. “Food is one of the things that makes us happy, people should start to worry less and enjoy life.”  
  
Lexa was totally charmed, she couldn't believe she could be so lucky to even talk to a girl like Clarke Griffin. Besides being a talented artist with a soul full of vitality - which was expressed entirety in her paintings - she had the freedom that Lexa had never tried.  
  
Lexa desperately wanted to know, wanted to talk to her, she wanted Clarke to heal her broken soul, just enough to make her feel alive again.  
  
She jumped when she felt something close to her mouth. Lexa looked at Clarke and she saw a chip on her bottom lip. Without even the need to taste it, she could feel the warmth of cappuccino and raised an eyebrow in search of explanations.  
  
“Open your mouth and taste, Miss Woods.” Clarke demand.  
  
Lexa didn't need to be told twice as she opened her mouth, chewing and letting the two flavors mix together on her tongue and it was … different.  
  
“Not bad, hmm?” Clarke chuckled seeing how Lexa was trying to hold back her disgust. “But nothing beats the fries with banana milkshake.” she added, almost solemn voice.  
  
“Go out with me Clarke." Lexa whispered and Clarke raised her head up. “Come to dinner with me, give me the chance to get to know you.”  
  
Clarke opened her mouth to answer but she was interrupted by the ringing of her phone and without thinking twice, she dug her hands into the bag. She could clearly feel Lexa eyes burn on her skin and with trembling hands she pressed the answer button, without even checking.  
  
“Finn!” She said with a little gasp. “No, no, of course I didn't forget, I was ...” she broke off and crossed Lexa's eyes. “I was working...in the middle of painting.” she lied. “Yes, I have to go with her, no, we don't have the car, you know Lincoln will not let her drive and-" she stopped and listened to him. “It would be very nice of you, baby, okay, yes, I'll call her.”  
  
Clarke saw Lexa move uncomfortable in her chair and pointed her eyes on the cup. She didn't really care what she thought.  
  
“Thank you again, me too...”  
  
Clarke closed the call and took a deep breath, holding the phone between her fingers. “I-I have to go” she said with a weak smile. “I have so much work to do and Finn will be picking me up before dinner and-” she stopped, standing up and grabbing the bag. “It was a pleasure to have coffee with you mis- Lexa!”  
  
Damn, she couldn't show Lexa how that invitation for a coffee had made her nervous, she didn't want Lexa to have that power over her, not anymore, not after all this time. After the marrige, Clarke had hoped with everything in her heart that Lexa would have come back through the door and take her away. however stupidity overwhelmed her when she received her first pay check from Lexa.  
  
Lexa had never wanted anything more than a name, someone that would allow it to help her to take control of her family company and Clarke had to remember that. No matter how much Lexa's eyes were digging into her soul and how badly she wanted to spend an evening with Lexa trying maybe to figure out what was hidden.  
  
“One dinner, Clarke.” Lexa said again standing up, resting her fists on the table. “One dinner and then, if you don't want to see me again, I will disappear.”  
  
Those words made Clarke feel a strange bitterness in her stomach, because she wasn't sure that was what she wanted.  
  
“I can't.” Clarke finally said. “I'm sorry, but I can't.” She smiled slightly and after picking up the rest of her things, she went to the door.  
  
Lexa followed Clarke with her eyes and she clenched her jaw, she ran her hands over her jacket before grabbing her wallet and her phone from the inside of the pocket. She punched in the number from the business card she was staring intensely at and walked to the door.  
  
A woman replied on the third ring, asking politely how she could be of service.  
  
“Alexandria Woods, I want to talk with mister Collins.”  
  
“He's in a meeting in this mome-”  
  
Lexa didn't let her finish. “I am the president of Woods Corporation and I am more than sure that Mr. Collins doesn't want to miss this call, no matter how important his meeting may be.”  
  
"Can you wait in line Miss Woods?” she asked.  
  
Lexa grinned. “I'll be happy to wait.”  
  
It was time for action.

 

 


	3. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta is fast and talented, you have to thank her for being so quick to publish the new chapter!

 

 

**Chapter 2**

 

Clarke stirred the rice in the pan, glancing at the clock hanging on the wall before going back to read the book she had on the counter. She loved reading, it was one of her greater passions, after painting, but the strict working routine she was imposing herself lately, led her with very little time to indulge in that interest. 

Finn was late. After taking Octavia and herself to the hospital for Octavia’s check up, he had excused himself and “ran” to an important meeting. He refused to tell her anything about it, but if the grin he had all day on his lips was any indication, she supposed he was meeting with a possible investor for his agency.  
  
So Clarke just enjoyed her time. She took Octavia back to her flat and chatted with her over a cup of coffee. She than went to the gallery and sorted out the cheques she earned the opening night, writing on each the title of the painting it was paying for.  
  
She invited Finn over for dinner with a text – she was curious to know about his meeting – and without waiting for his answer she went shopping for the ingredients of his favorite risotto. She knew he would pass by anyway, even if only to kiss her goodnight before going back home.  
  
If someone was willing to invest in his agency, they should celebrate.  
  


“Clarke?”  
  
Clarke jumped hearing her name: she didn't hear the door open, she was too deep into her reading.  
  
“In the kitchen.” She shouted. “Hope you're hungry, dinner is almost ready!” While closing the book to stir the risotto, and then tasting it.  
  
Seeing it was ready, she turned off the fire, just in time to meet Finn's tired gaze. It was a long day for him, she could tell by the loose tie, the wrinkled shirt and his messy hair, but still he was smiling.  
  
“Long day?” She asked, quirking an eyebrow.  
  
“You can't even imagine.” he said, approaching to kiss her lips. “Can I help you?”  
  
“Can you please put the glasses and wine on the table?” she asked, snaking her arms around him. “Are you hungry?”  
  
Finn nodded, leaning in to kiss her deeply, Clarke could tell the he was clearly hinting at a different kind of appetite. She had to admit that all the thoughts they both had lately, stole the quality time of their relationship. When his hand reached for her lower back, she pushed away.  
  
“Dinner first…” she whispered against his lips.  
  
“Can I stay tonight?” He asked softly.  
  
They weren't living together, even though they've been together for four years and Finn had her keys, they've never discussed moving in together, and she was ok with it like that. She loved her independence and even if Finn often spent the night with her, she preferred that he left the next day.  
  
“Maybe, if you play your cards right.” She teased, twisting his tie around her finger. “But dinner first, I'm starving.”  
  
Finn smiled letting her go and stepped to the fridge. “My favorite wine? Do we have something to celebrate?” He asked smiling, whilst getting two glasses from the cupboard.  
  
“I don't know, you should tell me.” She answered. “What happened at your meting today? Something came up?” She asked, filling the dishes.  
  
“You would be amazed.”  
  
He didn't finish, he stepped out of the kitchen to the living room, poured wine for them both and threw his jacket on the armrest of the couch. Clarke followed him close, setting the dishes and forks on the table, while Finn, like the gentlemen he was, moved the chair for her, kissing her cheek.  
  
He looked pleased and Clarke was excited to hear about the origin of his good mood. He sat in front of her, thanking her for the dinner and started to eat in silence.  
  
“So, are you gonna tell me what happened or should I beat it out of you?” She asked, sipping her wine.  
  
“You're right, sorry, but I was starving, I skipped both breakfast and lunch today.”  
  
“I never would have guessed, with what was happening before, back in the kitchen.” Clarke teased licking her lips and taking the fork to them.  
  
Finn stared intently at her over his glass. “I had a very important meeting this afternoon, I spent hours talking about all the problems the agency has, and ended up showing my plans to overcome them and to take them back to the top, but there's a big chance that everything will turn out fine. I'll have my answer tomorrow, after a meeting with their lawyer and an uncle - or it was a cousin? - involved with the company.”  
  
“Well, it's great!” Clarke agreed. “So tell me, who is the financier?” She asked interested.  
  
“Alexandria Woods.”  
  
Time suddenly stilled around her. Clarke was speechless, and found that she wasn’t hungry anymore. She moved the dish away from her.  
  
“Alexandria Woods.” she repeated softly, downing all her wine in one swift gulp.  
  
“She called me all of a sudden this morning to book a meeting.” He explained. “She seems very interested in may company. Finally some luck. I'm sure she'll be a great team member, even only as financier since I'll be making all of the decision.”  
  
Clarke's jaw stiffened and she pushed the dish farther. “I don't like that woman, Finn. I'm not sure it's a solid idea.” She finally said. “What makes you think that she'll stay out of the decisions? It's your agency, you shouldn't allow a stranger, someone like Alexandria Woods to interfere!” With shaking hands. she poured more wine.   
  
Finn's eyebrows drew together, he was confused: he had already noticed a strange tension between the two women at the inauguration, and he couldn't understand it.  
  
“Don't tell me you're jealous.” He said, amused. “Cause, from what the papers say, I'm really not her type and there are also rumors that she has a wife.  
  
Clarke took a deep breath, she wished she could tell him the truth about the identity of the Woods Corporation CEO's mysterious wife.  
  
She would have told him that she married her just to get the control over the company, disappearing just as she came, without the slightest concern of what that meant.  
  
She wanted to tell him that, just as promised, every month came a cheque and with that money she was able to pay for her college and create the future she had stopped dreaming of after her father's death.  
  
She wanted to tell him that, while he was struggling to save his family agency, his new financier already asked her out for dinner, move than once, shamelessly flirting with her, maybe hoping to jump in her bed for a night of passion that she definitely didn't want to give to her.  
  
“Don't be ridiculous.” She scoffed, gulping down her wine. “But I know her kind. She'll give you the money, but she'll ask something in return, I bet my gallery on it.”  
  
“She has already invested in many other companies, why it should be different for me?” He asked, confused.  
  
 _Because she wants to sleep with me._  
  
She wanted to say, but she didn't. She stood, taking her dish with nervous hands and stepped into the kitchen. She needed to calm down: she was sure that if he kept his questioning, she would let something slip. And even though she was sure that Lexa was up to something, Finn really needed her help.  
  
She jumped, feeling his chest against her back. His hands steadied her frantic movements, relaxing her almost immediately.  
  
“It will be fine, Clarke.” He said reassuringly, resting his head on her shoulder. “She'll speak with her lawyer, I will speak with mine, you know that I won't sign anything that will allow her to get my agency.”  
  
Clarke closed her eyes. She knew it would be harder than he thought, but she tried not to think about it. Not now that Finn's lips were brushing softly over her neck, sending shivers down her back. Finn's hands stroked her belly, reaching for the button of her trousers, Clarke bit her lower lip, she turned into his embrace, closing his lips with hers.  
  
Lexa Woods who?  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
Anya gripped her companion's hand while getting out of the elevator of the residential building where they were going to spend the evening, even though the plans she had in mind were very different from a boring party filled with useless chatter. She would have preferred staying home making love to her wife, going out for dinner at most, since their different jobs both stole too time away from their marriage.  
  
Her eyes found the door they were heading to and her eyebrows drew down, when she saw a blonde girl getting out of that same door, a sated smile on her lips.  
  
She was astonished.  
  
It was a very rare event, but lately Lexa was climbing the steps of Anya's indignation everyday fastest. She tried not to walk faster: she didn't want her wife's leg to suffer the consequences of her frustration, but she really wanted to burst into Lexa's apartment, throw on her face onto the documents she stored on the bottom of her briefcase and shout in her face that she was an idiot.  
  
To be completely honest, she didn't know why she hasn't done it yet. Maybe in her heart there still was a little flame of hope that Lexa could find her brain back and remember the name on the paper she signed six years ago. Sure, it hasn't been the best moment in her life and she knew all too well that Lexa got married just to get what was hers and lead the family Corporation, and eventually to overcome her loss, but she couldn't believe that she didn't even look at the name on the paper.  
  
That night, the minister could have even made her sign a document attesting her property of the Woods Corporation, and she signed without even give it a look. If she had done so, the name of the Blonde hat suddenly seems to obsess her, would have sound very familiar to her.  
  
“You're running, slow down.”  
  
The amused voice tamed her fast steps, while the girl who just emerged from Lexa's apartment swayed her hips past them, rearranging her blonde curls. Anya's face crumpled in disgust.  
  
“I know you're not into blondes, but it's not nice to make those faces to women, my love.”  
  
“I'm gonna shove those documents and her damn new contract up her sorry ass.” She growled.  
  
She didn't even bother to knock, she let herself in as if it was her home. She was surprised to find Lexa fully dressed, staring out of the window whilst sipping on a scotch. Had she not been so pissed, she'd probably made a comment on her masculine clothes, but she decided against it.  
  
“I really hope you're joking.” She began, not even bothering to greet her.  
  
Lexa turned to her, an eyebrow lifted in confusion. “About what? You should be more specific. Hello, Raven. Would you like something to drink?”  
  
“Whiskey, please, but don't bother: I can help myself.” She assured her, entangling from her wife's embrace and stepping to the minibar.  
  
“Where do you want me to start?” Anya barked “From that blondie that just left, who you laid, pretending she was someone else? Or from the useless searching about Finn Collins that you made me do? Or, again, from that ridiculous contract you forced me to draw up?”  
  
“I really don''t believe that anyone can force you to do anything, Anya.” She pointed out with a smile.  
  
“I can.” Raven interjected, from where she stood. “But she doesn't complain about that...”  
  
Lexa left her comment unnoticed and went on. “And since you're my lawyer, is it not amongst your duties to mind my interests?”  
  
Anya's jaw clenched, her fingers gripped hard on her briefcase, her annoyance growing stronger and stronger.  
  
“If you think you're gonna get her this way, you are so very wrong, Alexandria.” Anya said, flat, throwing the contract on the table.  
  
“Don't worry about me, Anya, I know what I'm doing.”  
  
“I really hope so.” She admonished. “All of this is wrong, and you know it.” She pointed a finger at her, when she saw her smiling softly. “And get that grin off your face, before l kick it off.””  
  
The bell rang, announcing the first guest of the party, so Anya let the argument down, at least for the moment. She knew too well that she would never be able to change Lexa's mind, but that didn't mean she couldn't pester her till the end of her days.  
  
Raven joined her, handing her a glass of wine with a smile. “She'll never change her mind.” She pointed out.  
  
Anya didn't answer, she took the offered glass, watching Lexa receive her first guests. “I hope that Clarke will be smart enough and not show up.”  
  
“She'll come, she likes her.” Raven said. “Lexa is irresistible, like a flame for a moth.”  
  
“Yeah, but she's gonna get burnt, if she's not careful…” Anya replied softly, her gaze on Lexa.  
  
That couldn't end well at all, she knew for sure.  
  
  
****  
  
  
Clarke looked disinterested the lights of Washington D.C, stretched like a carpet of stars under her feet. At any other occasion she would have found the sight lovely but not that tonight. Not while she sipped expensive French champagne on the balcony of the big Penthouse where her wife lived.  
  
The same wife who did not remember her.  
  
The same wife who does not even remember her name.  
  
The same wife who had spent all the evening looking for her with hungry eyes all over the house. Eventually, feeling hunted, she had taken refuge in the peace and quiet of the balcony.  
  
She sighed heavily, feeling the door behind her open. She continued to sip her champagne, refusing to turn around to face green eyes, but the voice that spoke to her did not belong to Lexa.  
  
“You're not having fun?”  
  
Clarke turned recognizing the woman who had spent all evening with Anya, in non-innocent behavior, making her assume that they had some kind of relationship.  
  
“It's not the kind of entertainment that I enjoy.” She said finally.  
  
Clarke was surprised by that revelation, she had no idea that Anya was married and moreover with a woman so attractive.  
  
“Raven Reyes.” She said holding out her right hand.  
  
“Clarke Griffin.” She said shaking it. “Nice to meet you, how do you know who my boyfriend is?” She asked curiously.  
  
“Spirit of observation.” Raven replied with an amused twinkle in her eyes. “And the fact of being married to the lawyer of the woman that your boyfriend wants to to go into business, I would say this helps.” she continued. “Anya is an inexhaustible source of information.”  
  
Clarke looked at her at her sideways. She was no longer sure that Raven was referring only to her relationship with Finn and the smile on her lips had confirmed it.  
  
“Do not worry, your secret is safe with me.” She said with a smile.  
  
“It's no secret.” Clarke pointed nervously. “I'm not the one with a bad memory, but I realize that a busy person like Alexandria Woods has a lot on in her mind, things that certainly don't include a poor waitress that she found in a dirty diner.”  
  
Raven was surprised by the brutality and bitterness that was apparent in those words but she realized that probably would feel the same if it had happened, but she knew that Lexa had made a rash decision that night.  
  
Of course, she had taken over the family business, as she had always wanted since the death of her father, but to do that she had closed her heart to any person and she was completely thrown into the job. She wasn't interested in what the girl she married could feel.  
  
It wasn't a surprise that Clarke had no kind words to say to Lexa.  
  
“Well, yes, to be the president of a company such as Woods Corporation is quite challenging, I can tell you for sure." Raven said, resting her elbows on the railing.  
  
"Buying cars, buying expensive champagne and houses like this one, should be pretty tiring." Clarke continued angilry.  
  
Raven looked back at her, tilting her head to the side. “Lexa is much more than her money, Clarke.” She assured. “She hides herself behind her iron facade, her money and her looks of uncaring and yes, she's such a hothead, as we all know.” Raven looked up at the sky and closed her eyes. "But she's also the strongest and most generous woman I have ever known in my life, even despite what happened to her. Without her, I-”  
  
The sentence was cut off in a half by the noise of the doors that opened out and both turned around confused, they were in the middle of a serious conversation and Anya had broken in, but she did not seem particularly upset.  
  
“Let's go.” She said turning to her wife, before looking at the blonde girl. “Hello, Clarke.”  
  
“Hello ...”  
  
“How nice you are tonight.” Raven said. "And where are we going, exactly?”  
  
“Lexa has severely tested my patience tonight, more than usual.” Anya said. “I want to have sex on her bed.”  
  
Clarke's eyes flew open and she saw a smile on Raven face.  
  
“We have already done that, my love.” She reminded her crossing her arms over the chest.  
  
“Then the shower.” she snap offering her hand. "Or something else, I'm sure we'll find a place that will make her angry."  
  
Raven took her hand. “How about her closet?" She asked, amused. “In the middle of all her suits and ironed shirts? I'm dying to crease her something!”  
  
Anya smiled, taking her hand to the lips. “I knew there was a reason why I love you so much.” She murmured.  
  
Raven turned to looked at Clarke. “It was nice meeting you, but as you can see I have an important thing waiting for me! I hope to see you soon!”  
  
And, just as they had appeared, they disappeared from her view, walking inside the apartment between people who occupied the living room. Clarke stood there, wondering if they really had sex in Lexa's bed and especially if they were about to do the same in her closet.  
  
No sane person would have done that, but she wasn't entirely sure.  
  
She shook her head and decided it was time to go home. She went to the party with Finn for the good of his funding but she had not planned to stay there all night, plus Finn had not looked at her once since they had come into the house.  
  
When she found herself sitting cross-legged on the black leather sofa the the living room, an hour and a half later with her fifth or perhaps sixth glass of champagne, Clarke decided she'd had enough.  
  
She had approached Finn after the episode on the balcony but one of the guests, a man who owned a film company or something like that, he had stolen Finn from her attentions and she was left alone again.  
  
Clarke had felt several times the gaze of Lexa burn on her skin and even though she had tried to resist, she could clearly feel the shivers down her spine, so she was forced to turn away the thought of Lexa from her own mind.  
  
Clarke raised her eyes again looking for Finn and she realized that the living room was almost empty, just a few men were still talking to each other but they were about to leave because they were wearing their coats.  
  
She finished her glass of Champagne, put it down on table next to the couch and stood up, running her hands on the black dress she wore, before take steps towards Finn that he was talking with a man.  
  
When she reached Finn, he slid his hand around her waist, smiling warmly to the man who was holding her hand, probably ready to leave. Clarke felt Finn's lips touch her forehead and she sighed, all the frustration that had accumulated until then escaped with a simple kiss.  
  
“Can we go home now?” She asked in a whisper.  
  
“Yes, love, let's go home.” Finn said holding her close. “Let me take your coats.”  
  
Before he could get away, Lexa stopped him with a genuine smile.  
  
“This has been a pretty productive night for you, Collins.” Lexa began raising an eyebrow. “I hope it was worth it, I arranged everything to be able to introduce you to the most highest number of potential new customers.”  
  
  
Finn was surprised by the words, he thought that Lexa had broadening the invitation just because he was present when she talked about it on the phone.  
  
“Really? Let me say I'm very confused ... “  
  
“Of course you are.” Lexa said. “Let me say goodbye to the guests and then we will speak of my business proposal. It will take me a minute.” She reassured him when she saw Finn throw a worried look to Clarke.  
  
Lexa also saw the frown that had appeared on Clarke: it was clear that she could not wait to leave as soon as possible but Lexa had other plans on how to end the evening.  
  
“I'm sorry.” Finn said guilty. “If you want to go I-”  
  
“It's okay, Finn.” Clarke reassured him. “She said she wanted to talk to you about her business proposal. So I guess that you have your that: this is the only thing that matters.”  
  
Finn took her hand and kissed it reverently. “It will be worth it, I promise.”  
  
They were so into each other that did not notice Anya and Raven who had stopped in front of them.  
  
“It was nice meeting you, Clarke but for me the evening ends here.” Raven said with regret. “My leg no longer holds these evenings.”  
  
Instinctively Clarke's eyes shifted to the leg in question, but, after realizing that she had been too indiscreet she blushed.  
  
"It will be a story that I will tell you the next time we meet." She reassured her with a wink.  
  
“It's been a pleasure, Raven.” Clarke replied shaking her hand. “I'm sure we will not miss the opportunity to see each other again.”  
  
“Definitely not.” Anya agreed, spoke for the first time since she had seen her on the balcony. “Good night, Clarke, goodbye Finn.”  
  
They talked for a few more seconds and then Anya and Raven reached the door followed by the other guests who Lexa was escorting outside. Clarke saw clearly Anya say something between her teeth to Lexa, only to be dragged away from her wife.  
  
The apartment fell into complete silence and Clarke instinctively squeezed Finn's hand as in search of comfort: she had the feeling of being trapped and it was a feeling she did not like at all.  
  
“Sorry it took me longer than expected.” Lexa began. “I had to organize a meeting for tomorrow, something that could not really be delayed.”  
  
“I understand.” Finn nodded.  
  
“Why don't you take a seat, so we can get right into the matter?” Lexa asked, pointing to the sofa.  
  
Clarke and Finn sat down, their hands still bound together, Lexa took a seat in front of them, crossing her legs and watching them with intense eyes.  
  
“Okay, I showed the documents to my a lawyer and I looked at the budgets to the last couple of years.” She began. “Your agency can go back to the top but you need to make some financial move that will allow it, I will give you some advice about it if you want.”  
  
Clarke's body was rather tense: she was afraid of where that speech might have to end up; her thinking had not changed, she was almost sure that Lexa had something in mind.  
  
“But we'll talk about it later and if you're interested of course.” Lexa made it clear with a small smile, then she took a long break. “I am willing to invest in your agency, Finn.” She said.  
  
Finn held Clarke's hand and she reciprocated, trying to give him full support, because something in Lexa's tone was fairly vague, like she was about to add something else.  
  
“Why do I have the feeling that it isn't everything?” Clarke asked in the end, unable to bear the silence.  
  
And for the first time since they were sitting, Lexa looked at her. “Your feeling is correct.” She said. “The second part of this proposal relates to you.”  
  
Clarke tensed immediately, but, before she could say a word, Finn stopped her.  
  
“Clarke is not part of my company, I don't understand the connection.”  
  
"In fact, this proposal is addressed both. You as a company and to you as a person." Lexa said. “Because what I want right now is to not limit myself and not only get to know the person that I am investing in right now..." Lexa continued, pointing a finger at him. “But I want to get to know the person that I can also invest in, in the future, that's Clarke.”  
  
Finn scowled. “I still do not understand what all this has to do with Clarke.”  
  
"I saw her paintings and they are amazing. It would be an honor for me to be able to invest in her gallery and her art.” She explained.  
  
“And how all of this takes us to my loan?”  
  
Clarke had figured out what kind of game Lexa was playing, if her eyes had been able to kill, probably the woman would find herself in a pile of dust on her expensive sofa.  
  
“Simply: I will give you two million dollars for your agency, which are much more than you actually need but it will help you to stand up completely and save your employees.”  
  
“But? I have the feeling that there is a _but_ at the end of this sentence.” Finn said coldly.  
  
“In return I want to spend a whole week with Clarke, to be able to get to know her. Her and her art.” Lexa eyes pointed on Clarke. _“Alone.”_

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know many of you think that Lexa behaves like an arrogant, but it's the only way she knows to not let people know her. Give her a chance I assure you will fall in love with this Lexa!


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel compelled to clarify something. Lexa never said to Clarke "I want to have sex with you"  
> She has show interest in Clarke? Of course.  
> She has asked her to go out? Yes.  
> But for her it is much more than physical interest, Lexa is attracted to the way Clarke's live her life.  
> Thanks again to my beta, which is doing a great job!

 

**Chapter 3**

 

Clarke ran her hands through her hair and she sighed ,tired, settling on Octavia couch waiting for the drink that her friend had gone to take into the kitchen. It had been two weeks since Alexandria Woods had spoken with her and Finn in her living room.  
  
Two weeks that had done nothing but increase his anger.   
  
Two weeks without work, not a single sketch.  
  
Clarke was furious.  
  
She could not believe that that woman had asked for such a thing and if Finn wanted to save his company she was forced to accept the proposal. His agency was winding down and no matter how much the boy was struggling to find another nvestor, things were moving slowly or it was better to say ,that they did not move at all.  
  
Clarke shook her head and decided to dismiss the thought at least for the moment, Octavia had returned a few days after the visit she had made to her brother, Bellamy, in New York and on the phone she had seemed excited about something. She would not allow Lexa to slip in her thoughts when she was in the company of her closest friends.  
  
Octavia came back a few seconds later, her glass of lemonade in one hand and a cup of hot tea in the other. She handed it to Clarke with a small smile and sat in front of her, her eyes a bit lost and trembling hands.  
  
Clarke sipped her drink, without realizing that something was wrong with Octavia and she gave her an encouraging smile, ready to hear all the news.  
  
“Then? What did the doctor say?” She asked curiously.  
  
Octavia ran her fingertips on the edge of the mug. “It's a girl.” she said with a small smile.  
  
"This is amazing!” Clarke said with excitement but her eyebrows furrowed when she saw that her friend did not seem to share that same opinion. “Or not?” She asked, confused. “Octavia ... is everything all right?”  
  
Octavia looked up, her eyes were too sad, so different from those full of life and happy that she suppose to have, Clarke quickly got up and sat down beside her, took her hand.  
  
“What did the doctor say? Is something wrong with the child?”  
  
Octavia shook her head and took a shaky breath, trying to organize her thoughts but the door that separated the living room from the bedrooms opened and Lincoln came out. Clarke looked genuinely confused, he was supposed to be at work but the thing that left her completely speechless was what he was wearing.  
  
“Clarke.” He greeted smiling warmly, before disappearing into the kitchen.  
  
“Okay, what's going on?” Clarke asked with furrowed brows. “Actually, no, let's go step by step: the little girl is all right?” When Octavia just nodded, Clarke spoke again with much less weight on her heart. “Okay, good. Now, why Lincoln is here at this time and why he wears that uniform?”  
  
“Finn didn't tell you?” Octavia asked blank.  
  
“Tell me what? What the hell is going on?”  
  
Lincoln went back into the living room, a bottle of water in one hand and an apple. Clarke glanced at him and the boy smiled at her again but there was clearly something different in his attitude.  
  
“Finn didn't say anything to her.” Octavia murmured.  
  
“I can't blame him.” Lincoln replied, reaching the sofa before speaking again. “They have made some redundancies, Clarke.” he began. “They fired about fifty people, mostly young and I was one of them.”  
  
Clarke opened her eyes wide and moved her gaze between the two, completely disbelieving. Finn had not told her anything and when she asked questions about what was happening, he had wound up with a smile and said: _'Everything is all right._ '  
  
Apparently it was not true since Lincoln, one of his most promising publicists, had just been fired, leaving him without a job and with a child to be born soon. She looked at his clothing and everything was much more clear.  
  
“And then you have found a job as a janitor.” she murmured.  
  
“Security guard.” He corrected her. “Hey, it's not bad, okay? Yes, I do night shifts but the pay is good and right now is what we need.”  
  
Clarke swallowed hard. “Linc ... I'm so sorry.” She said, mortified.  
  
“For what? It is not your fault or Finn's” He wanted to explain carefully. “I know he is doing everything in his power and I don't want to lose hope. I'm sure that Finn will be find a solution.” He continued, smiling. “And when it happens, I'll be there, ready to take my place again” Lincoln continued with a wink.   
  
But Clarke was not entirely sure about it: she knew almost for sure that Finn was having trouble finding some other backer, mostly because Alexandria Woods was interested in his company.  
  
No one would have the courage to get in her way.  
  
“I have to go, otherwise I will be stuck in traffic.” Lincoln leaned down to kiss Octavia gently on the lips. “Everything will be fine, okay? We need to try to not lose hope, we will get out of this situation.” He said to Clarke.   
  
Clarke nodded and watched him go to the door hand in hand with his wife, the heart sank when she saw Lincoln bending over to whisper something to Octavia belly.  
  
She bit her bottom lip and she knew she had to do something.  
  
  
****  
  
  
Anya put down the phone and sighed deeply, crossing her wife's eyes that was staring at her across the desk. Seeing Raven made her feel immediately better and was pleased that she had gone to visit her to take her out for lunch: Anya really needed a bit of time with her wife to relax.  
  
“Hard day?” Raven asked, leaning over to take her hand.  
  
“It was Clarke.” Anya sighed deeply. “She calls me some days to know the progress of her divorce, I ignored her for almost two weeks. I was pretty much forced to take the call today because she threatened to appear in person here in the office.”   
  
Raven looked at her confused, not understanding why Anya had decided to ignore the girl.  
  
“And why are you ignoring her?” she asked curiously. “Clarke has the right to ask for dev-” Raven froze when she noticed her evasive look. “What have you done, Anya?” She asked, crossing her arms.  
  
“Why do you assume I've done something.”  
  
“Because you have your typical expression of when you've done something.” she pointed out with amusement. “And I'm sure it's something big.”  
  
Anya rolled her eyes and stood up. “I am innocent.” She put it clear with an angry gesture of the hand. “And this is maybe the point of all the situation.”  
  
Raven was silent for a long minute, trying to figure out what her wife was trying to tell her. “Okay, babe, I love you but you have to talk clearly because it's hard for me to figure out what you're to try to say.”  
  
“I have not given the divorce papers to Lexa.” Anya leaned against the desk so she could look Raven in the eye.  
  
Raven opened her eyes wide. “What?!” she exclaimed in a tone of voice a little bit high.  
  
“Shhh!”  
  
Anya getting up and walking quickly to close the office door, across the hall she could clearly see Lexa, and she certainly did not want the whole office hear that conversation.  
  
“Anya, tell me you're kidding.” Raven said.  
  
“I was about to give her the documents.” Anya began taking a few steps toward her. “Then Lexa started to talk about this girl and _how_ this girl had done a spell on her. And _how_ her eyes were wonderful and crap like that.”  
  
“Oh, come on.” Raven interrupted raising a hand to stop her. “Lexa would never say these things, not _this_ Lexa.”  
  
"God, Raven, you have no idea of the things that are coming out of Lexa mouth in the last few weeks.” Anya said with a disgusted look. “And then when she told me the name of this girl, I thought I'd wait to give her the divorce papers to see how Lexa would behave.”  
  
Raven laughed ironically. “And then ... Lexa has acted as Lexa.” she said, raising an eyebrow.  
  
“I fucked up, that's what you want to hear?” Anya sighed running a hand through her hair. “I could not imagine that she would have made this mess! I thought she would have done things in a normal way, like invite Clarke to dinner or something.”  
  
And Anya did not lie: for a moment she had really hoped that Lexa did things in a different way but when Lexa had appeared in her office and asked her to draw up the contract, Anya had wondered if that morning Lexa had hit her head when she fell out of the bed.  
  
Then, the morning after the party, Clarke had called her to ask confirmation and she understood that things would go to hell very soon.  
  
“Please talk about this crap with your customers, Anya. ” Raven said. “We both know Lexa has her own way of dealing with these situations.”  
  
Anya dropped against her desk and sighed: she was in a tricky situation and she did not know how to manage it.  
  
“I put myself in big trouble.” she murmured. “If I bring the documents to Lexa now, and she reads Clarke's name, in the worst scenario, I lose my job and my best friend.” Anya opened her legs when she saw that her wife wanted to place herself between them. “If I don't bring them to Lexa, Clarke will come here shouting and this, of course, will make me lose my job-”   
  
Raven put her fingers on her wife's lips. “Clarke will never come here.” she said, “As far she wants a divorce, she's not ready to face her, especially not now Lexa has pulled out this contract.”  
  
“But-”  
  
“So now you need to forget their problems for a while.” Raven continued. “Let's go out for lunch and when we return, we will think about a solution, okay?”  
  
Anya nodded slightly, then she smiled putting her hands on Raven's hips, pulled her close and close her mouth. “I'm almost tempted to skip lunch” Anya whispered.  
  
“But I'm hungry.” Raven chuckled, pointing hands on her chest and trying to push her away with a smile.  
  
“Me too.” Anya murmured gently biting her neck.  
  
Raven moaned in her arms and inclined her head to give her more access. “Play your cards in the right way, lawyer and maybe you'll be lucky.”  
  
Anya smiled and looked up, staring intensely and getting lost in those wonderful dark eyes. Raven always made everything better just with her presence, Anya felt lucky to have her.  
  
“Let's have lunch.” she finally agreed, rubbing her nose against hers.  
  
Anya would do anything just to see Raven smile like that.

  
  
***  
  
  
Finn sipped his coffee in silence, watching the small pond in front of him. It had been a hard day and when Clarke had called him, he had planned to relax, he told her to join him at the park to take advantage of the wonderful day.  
  
Things had not turned out as he had planned.  
  
In fact, nothing had gone as he had planned the last few weeks but after talking to Clarke, it was all worse. He keep his eyes on the pond and felt Clarke's head leaning on his shoulder.  
  
“Say something.” Clarke whispered with broken voice.  
  
Finn closed his eyes and squeezed his fingers around the glass trying to keep control. “I don't know what to say, Clarke.” he replied, “I wish I could say, but things are falling apart very fast.”  
  
“I know.” she murmured, rubbing her face in his neck. “I will not do it, but it's necessary.” She assured. “Lincoln is not the only one to lose their jobs.”  
  
The boy nodded slightly and kissed her head. “No one wants to invest, Clarke, no one.” he said almost desperately.  
  
“It's just a week.” Clarke said turning to look at him. “A week passes in a hurry, it will be over before you may have noticed my absence.”  
  
Finn clenched his jaw: he knew Lexa's reputation, the newspapers telling of her adventures all the time. Jealousy caught him and Clarke saw it, she took Finn's face in her hands to force him to look at her.  
  
“And what if she's interested in you in any other way?” He asked with concern.  
  
“That's her problem, Finn, I'm not interested.” She replied flat, trying to sound as convincing as possible. “I'll put the record straight immediately, I spend the week with her, I'll give her my time and nothing else.”  
  
Finn sighed heavily and closed his eyes. “I feel so bad having you do that, Clarke.” He finally admitted. “It's not your job to take care of this and if I'm not able to provide for my employees, then maybe-”   
  
Clarke put her finger to his lips and shook her head. “Do not talk nonsense, it's not your fault that your father has left you deep in debt. You're doing your best since you took over the company, I know that and even your employees.” She murmured, leaning her forehead against Finn's. “And you're not asking me to do anything, I offered and if this is the only way to save all those people and their job, so be it.”  
  
Finn leaned over to kiss her gentle, he could not really believe that Clarke was willing to sacrifice herself in that way for the good of his business, Finn was not deserving of a wonderful woman like Clarke.  
  
“I love you.” Finn muttered burying his head in her neck.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip but she did not answer, she simply stay silent. She had no idea why the words were stuck in her throat.  
  
“You're not forced to do it.” Finn repeated.  
  
Clarke smiled softly and cupped his cheeks, staring at him intently. “Let's go to sign these documents.”  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
The big windows were open, letting in waves of the night wind, ruffling up the curtains and matching the ending of the melody from the iphone docking station on the table. When the next song started to fill the apartment, Lexa, her wet hair tied in a towel matching the one wrapped around her body, came out of the corridor with her underwear in a hand and the hair drier in the other.  
  
“ _ **I look up to the little bird, that glides across the skyyyyy.”**_ she sang along Annie Lennox, discarding her underwear on the table.   
  
She stepped through the living room moving her hips to the music, and moving to the minibar to pour herself a glass of wine.  
  
“ _ **He sings the clearest melodyyyyy, it makes me want to cryyyyy**_!”  
  
She went on grabbing the bottle with a sudden movement and juggling it at the rhythm of the song.   
  
“ _ **It makes me want to sit right down and cry cry cry."  
  
**_ She poured the wine and took a long sip.  
  
“I _ **walk along the city streets so dark with rage and fear.  
  
**_ With the glass in her hand she went to the open window to look at the city, letting the music caress her, like the best of her lovers.  
  
“ _ **And I... I wish that I could be that bird and fly away from here. I wish I had the wings to fly away from here.”  
  
**_ She smiled listening to Annie's voice, she leaned on the window pane and sipped her wine.  
  
“ _ **But my, my I feel so low.”  
  
**_ She gulped the wine down and turned around in a swift motion that threw the towel on her head, onto the floor.  
  
" **My, my where do I go? My, my what do I know ? My, my we reap what we sow?"  
  
** She danced around the living room, her hair flying around, letting drops of water to run down her exposed neck.  
  
“ _ **They always said that you knew best, but this little bird's fallen out of that nest now, I've got a feeling that it might have been blessed, so I've just got to put these wings to test!”  
  
**_ She screamed, waving her hips and resting the empty glass on the table. She unwrapped herself from the towel around her body, slipping inside her underwear in a quick move.   
  
“ _ **Uhhh uhhh! Ohhh Ohhh! Uhhh! Uhhh! Ohhh Ohhh!"  
  
**_ She sang moving around the living room, unconcerned of the open window and of the fact that she was wearing only a pair of culottes so tight that they seamed to be painted on her hips.  
  
“ _ **For I am just a troubled soul who's weighted...”  
  
**_ She turned in a jump to the door, when the door bell rang, and her eyes immediately scanned the clock on the wall.  
  
“He's early.” She mumbled, wrapping herself back in the towel, while gripping the money she had prepared on the table.   
  
She opened the door, not even bothering to check who it was, she gazed at the delivery guy, who was staring at her, his mouth agape. She gazed critically at the bag he was carrying, snatching it from his hands and throwing to him a fifty dollars note.   
  
“Keep the change.” he said closing the door on his face.  
  
Waving her hips in the rapture of music, she went back to the table, laying the bag on it and gripping the glass to get more wine.  
  
_**“But my, my I feel so low, my, my where do I go? My, my what do I know ? My, my we reap what we sow?"  
  
**_ She used the glass as a microphone, while again, she discarded again the towel around her body, banging her head around.  
  
“ _ **They always said that you knew best, but this little bird's fallen out of that nest now.”  
  
**_ She took a sip and threw her head back, licking her lips.  
  
“ _ **I've got a feeling that it might have been blessed, so I've just got to put these wings.”  
  
**_ She gulped down the rest of the wine and rested against the glass on the table, gripping the hairdryer and using it as a microphone, before bending down to plug it to the power socket,  
  
“ _ **But my, my I feel so low? My, my where do I go?"  
  
**_ She sang waving her head in time with the music, while the hot hair ruffled her long hair, she moved her hips, taking the hairdryer to hel lips in her best imitation of the singer.  
  
“ **My, my where do I go? My, my what do I know? My, my we reap what we sow?”  
  
** “If that's not the best thing I've ever seen, I really don't know what else can be."  
  
  
Raven's voice overcame the music, Lexa quickly turned around, covering her naked chest with a hand, she stared at her, confused, while turning the hair-dryer off.  
  
“Raven, wh-what are you doing here?”  
  
Raven showed her the spare key as if it was an explanation. As she approached, Lexa could see that she was holding a folder.  
  
“Anya phoned you a couple of times, now I understand why she didn't get an answer.” She started, amused. “She had other paperwork to finish off before heading home, but she was sure you would have wanted this documents as soon as possible, so, since I was heading this way…” She suggested resting the folder on the table.  
  
Lexa gave it a glance and her lips curled up. “Thank you for that, Anya was right, this paperwork is very important...”  
  
“Happy to help.” She answered, waving her hand dismissively, while looking around curious. Her gaze stopped on the bag of delivered Chinese food. “So... the great Alexandria Woods has an hidden side and organises parties filled with music, karaoke and Chinese food and no one is invited?” She asked amused, lifting an eyebrow.  
  
Lexa stared intently at her for a long moment. “If you promise that what you just saw won't get out of here, I'll let you have all the chicken.”  
  
Raven stayed silent for a moment, thank extended a hand to her, smiling. “Deal.”

  
  
***  
  
  
From the moment she had stepped into the office that morning, Anya had known that it was going to be one hell of a day. Hearing one of the assistants trying to stop what seemed to be an hurricane, she knew she had been right.  
  
She got up, ready to intervene, but she stopped when the door open in front of her.  
  
“Mrs. Forrest I-I've tried to stop her, but she-"  
  
When she met those blue angry eyes, Anya lifted her hand, stopping the assistant’s words, giving her a reassuring smile.  
  
“It’s okay, Carole, everything’s alright.” She assured. “You can go. And please, close the door.”  
  
The girl nodded, unsure and bending her head she closed the door behind her, leaving the office in a thick, tense silence. Anya watched Clarke for a long moment, offering her a chair, while rounding back her desk to sit herself down.   
  
“You ignored all my calls.” Clarke began, her jaw clenched. “And since you never called back, I decided to come in person.” She growled, throwing a folder of documents on the desk.  
  
Anya stared at them for a long moment before turning a surprised gaze upon her. “You’ve signed it?!”  
  
“I didn’t sign for her” She immediately clarified.  
  
They stared at each other and Anya tried to find something else from sense of duty toward those people in her determined blue eyes. Clarke’s cold mask didn’t budge: she had no intention to show how really nervous she was about spending an entire week in Lexa’s company.  
  
“I’m sorry for not returning your calls, I was very bu-”  
  
“Bullshit.” Clarke growled. “I’m not an idiot, Anya, don't treat me like one.”  
  
Anya sighed. “I know you’re not.”  
  
“I know lawyers have a twisted sense of morale, but Jesus Christ, Anya, don’t you think this is too much?” She exclaimed pointing the documents on her desk. “I can’t believe you would indulge in this filth."  
  
The lawyer rested against her chair, smiling with unconcealed irony. “I’m quite used to filth, Clarke, especially considering that some of the thing I do with my wife in bed are against the law of at least five States.” She explained amused. “And not only in bed, actually, but even against the door, the walls-”  
  
“I’m not interested in what you do with your wife, Anya!” Clarke exclaimed, slamming a hand on the desk. “That thing is disgusting, I hope you and Alexandria Woods are aware of that.”  
  
Without further words, she turned around and stepped to the door, only to be stopped by Anya’s voice as soon as her hand gripped the doorknob.  
  
“I know her methods are...” She began. “”Unorthodox, but she doesn’t know any other way. And it’s not an excuse, Clarke, it’s just the way she is."  
  
Clarke closed her eyes, biting down her lower lips and gripping the doorknob until her knuckles turned white. Anya’s words had hit ten harder than she wanted to show, because in the end, the thought that Lexa could be more than she appeared scared her more than anything.  
  
“I know that it’s an absurd situation, but it’s done now.” Anya went on, giving her no escape. “Use that week to get to know her, really _know her_. I promise you, you won’t regret it.”  
  
Clarke swallowed and without answering she pushed the door with a deep sigh. She carefully reached the elevator, trying not to bump against anyone. She didn’t want to let Anya’s words get to her, but she had to regretfully admit that they had already hit the mark.  
  
She had agreed to spend a week with Lexa, but she had no intention in giving her anything but her time. She had no desire to know her.  
  
_“Use that week to get to know her, really know her. I promise you, you won’t regret it._ ”  
  
She shook her head, frantically pushing the elevator button, her heart pumping furiously in her chest. She had to get out before fate decided to play a joke on her and made Lexa appear. She didn’t want to meet her, not now.  
  
“Come on!” She growled staring at the number changing way too slowly on the elevator display.   
  
She didn’t notice the green eyes staring intently at her from the bottom of the hallway.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is: little bird by Annie Lenox
> 
> What will be the first stop of their week?


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First stop of their week

**Capitolo 4**

 

Hadn't it been unfeminine and not her style, Clarke probably would have screamed at the sky with all her might, even if it was useless. So, she just threw her clothes in the suitcase on her bed in anger, muttering her frustration.  
  
A week had passed since she signed that stupid contract, without a single word from Lexa, until that morning. Anya had called her to tell her that her obligations would start that night. Anya told her to to take with her enough clothes for the whole week.  
  
Clarke had tried to get some information from her, but the lawyer had just laughed and ended the call. Clarke was so flustered that she just couldn’t concentrate on her work, so at midday, she had decided to get back home.  
  
“Damn woman!” She growled shoving her bra in the suitcase. “She doesn't even had the decency to call me in person. Who does she think she is?!” She asked rhetorically, while throwing clothes around. “How am I gonna survive this week? How? They're gonna make me a saint.”  
  
Her frustration was sky high and her jaw clenched when she was finished with her suitcase, she grabbed her beauty case and entered the bathroom to get her toiletries, hairbrush and make-up bag.  
  
Her phone was ringing in her bedroom, she sighed in relief at the sight of Octavia's name on the screen. She answered the call, putting it on speaker whilst mentally checking her list to be sure to have all she needed.  
  
“Good morning, miss Griffin.” Octavia called. “You took a day off? I came to the gallery and it was empty.”  
  
“Morning to you, Blake.” She greeted. “Yeah, I left early.”  
  
“Early? It’s only midday!”  
  
Clarke bit her lower lip, trying not to vent her frustration on her innocent friend, “I had something to do.” She said, vaguely.  
  
Clarke used the long silence that followed to reach the kitchen, so she could have lunch and use the afternoon to get some work done.  
  
“Well, busy girl, I just wanted to tell you that today Lincoln got back to work.” Octavia started. “And I wanted to see you because I went to the hospital to book a check-up…”  
  
Clarke opened the fridge. “Is everything fine?” She asked with apprehension. “You had a check-up just two weeks ago. Is the baby okay?”  
  
“Breathe.” Octavia chuckled. “Everything's fine, the baby is perfectly healthy, but the last ultrasound showed that she is breech.” she quickly explained, “The doctor wants to keep her in check, if she doesn’t turn back, they’re gonna have to give me a c-section.”  
  
“She was already in position. How the hell did she turn?” Clarke asked confused, while making a sandwich.  
  
Octavia stayed silent for a moment. “I’m not sure you really wanna know, it involves my husband and our bedroo- “  
  
“Okay! You’re right, I don’t wanna know!” The images that crossed her mind were way over her duty as a friend.  
  
“So, I was wondering if you wanted to come and see your niece next Thursday.”  
  
Cutting a tomato, Clarke shook her head, silently cursing Alexandria Woods. “I can’t.” She finally sighed. “I have something to do and I really can’t delay. Work duties.”  
  
“Oh, okay, no problem.” Octavia assured.  
  
Clarke heard muffled sounds and Octavia talking with someone, so she used the silence to finish preparing her sandwich.  
  
“Can I call you back in a couple of minutes, Clarke?”  
  
“Sure, I’ll wait here, holding my breath.” She joked.  
  
“Talk to you later.” She said closing the call.  
  
Clarke cleaned up the kitchen counter and grabbed a beer from the fridge, than stepped in the living room. She wanted to rest a little before getting back to work, hoping that her thoughts would let her be.  
  
With her feet on the coffee table, she stretched to grab the remote, but before she could turn on the TV, her phone started buzzing and without checking who it was, she pushed the green button.  
  
“That was quick.” She smiled.  
  
The voice that answered was definitely not Octavia's.  
  
“I didn't know you were waiting my call.”  
  
Clarke straightened up on the couch, her fingers white from the strength of her grip on the phone. “That’s a surprise.” She answered in disdain. “I can't believe you had the nerve to call, since you let your lawyer warn me about the beginning of your week. “  
  
Lexa chuckled. “I was very busy. I had to make arrangements in sight of my prolonged absence.” She explained. “How was your day?”  
  
“I don’t think you called for the pleasure of making small talk.” Clarke cut her short, sipping on her beer. “I’m busy too and you are interrupting, so tell me why you called.”  
  
Lexa didn't answer and Clarke could hear muffled sounds and a door closing with a little thud.  
  
“I’m happy you agreed to my proposal.” Lexa started.  
  
“I’m not doing it for you.” Clarke muttered through clenched teeth, trying not to hold back her frustration.  
  
Lexa ignored her statement and kept talking. “And I can’t wait to start our week together, Clarke. That’s why my driver will pick you up at half past eleven, tonight.”  
  
“Half past eleven? Have I lost my right to sleep?!”  
  
Who the hell did she think she was? Clarke’s patience was almost finished.  
  
“You’ll be able to sleep during the flight.” Lexa reassured her. “Our week will start the moment you step onto the jet.”  
  
Clarke opened her mouth, and not finding words, she closed it again. Anya told her to get her suitcase ready, but the thought that they were going to leave the city never crossed her mind.  
  
“Where are you going to take me?” she asked.  
  
“Trust me.” Lexa answered. “Half past eleven, Clarke, my driver is always on time.”  
  
“Lexa, wa-” All she could hear was the signal of the ended call.  
  
She threw her phone on the coffee table, screaming her frustration to the ceiling. She knew one thing for sure: she was going to lose her temper before the end of the week.  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
_**Paris.**_

 

Lexa had taken her to Paris.  
  
They got on her private jet, flew across the ocean and landed in France.  
  
Clarke swallowed while watching in awe the city passed by the car’s window. She’d always dreamt of visiting Paris, but she’d never find the chance to make the journey. She could feel Lexa’s eyes on her, but, just as she did along the flight, she just ignored her, keeping her gaze on the view.  
  
“Are you hungry?” Lexa finally asked, breaking the heavy silence.  
  
Clarke shook her head, and truthfully her stomach was completely closed, but she wasn't sure of the cause. Lexa released a heavy sigh, running a hand through her hair, trying not to lose her temper, but the girl was really testing her.  
  
After Adam had helped her out of the car and escorted her to the jet, Clarke had just gave her a quick greeting, before closing herself up in a stubborn silence. She had slept through the most of the flight and in the morning she had consumed her breakfast with her eyes in the clouds, not saying a single word.  
  
Lexa had tried to make some conversation, she’d been cut off as soon as she’ve started. Anya's words resonated in her mind: maybe her friend was right, maybe she should have tried another way.  
  
“We’re here, miss Woods.” Adam called.  
  
Lexa looked out the window, a little smile spreading on her lips at the sight of Orsay palace. Her smile widened when she saw Clarke’s stunned look.  
  
Adam quickly got out the car, and helped Clarke do the same, but when he tried to help his boss too, he found Lexa already out of the car, waiting for Clarke.  
  
“Ready?” she asked with a little smile.  
  
Clarke stared at the building with wide eyes: it was the most beautiful thing she ever laid her eyes on. Pictures didn’t match the actual beauty of the former train station La Gare d'Orsay and the thought of walking through the paintings of the greatest impressionists gave her chills.  
  
“You are completely out of your mind.”  
  
That was the first thing Clarke had said to her since they got on the plane the night before. Lexa smiled: at least she had spoken to her, finally.  
  
“Yeah, you're not the first to tell me so.” She answered. “But I can tell that you just can’t wait to get in, so let's go.”  
  
She gestured to get in, closing her jackets buttons, Adam discretely followed them a few steps behind, allowing them some privacy. Lexa joined the row of tourists, whilst Clarke’s shaking hands showed the girl’s impatience.  
  
“Have you ever been here?” She asked curious.  
  
Clarke shook her head. “I don’t have the time to travel to France during a working week.” She answered in an harsh tone, regretting it almost immediately.  
  
“It would be hard for you to believe it, but me neither.” Lexa said. “I don’t have loads of free time.” She went on, advancing along the line. “I’ve come several times to Paris, but mostly for work purposes, and I didn’t get the chance to explore it’s beauty, it’s art.”  
  
“This city is overflowing with art.” Clarke muttered, admiring the building.  
  
They advanced silently in the line and when they finally arrived at the box office, Clarke’s mouth fell open hearing Lexa ask for two tickets in an almost perfect French.  
  
She never found French a particularly sensual language, but for some reason Lexa’s voice speaking it turned her legs to jelly. She tried to compose herself, but as soon as they went through the door, all her thoughts left from her mind.  
  
She could smell the story, the art, antiquity: she loved everything about it.  
  
“This place is huge, I- I don’t even know were to start!” She exhaled, frantically looking around.  
  
There were so many things she wanted to see: paintings, sculptures, Art Deco objects, pictures, medals, printings.  
  
“We're in no rush, Clarke.” Lexa reassured her. “You can take all the time you want.”  
  
  
The smile suddenly spreading on her lips took her breath away, and before she could understand what was happening, Clarke gripped her sleeve, tugging her across the ancient marble floor.  
  
“Well then, miss Woods, get ready for your first art lesson.” She declared, entering the first room.  
  
  
  
Almost three hours later, Lexa was exhausted, but happy that Clarke had not refrained from giving her a heartfelt art lesson. She had something to tell her about almost every painting in the museum, taking her time on the works she had found most interesting.  
  
Lexa learned lots of things that she had completely ignored before. She has meant it when she had told Clarke the the numbers were more for her than art, but hearing her talking about it with so much passion had made her happy.  
  
“You're bored, aren't you?” Clarke finally asked, whilst entering the last room: the one dedicated to Vincent Van Gogh.  
  
Clarke has wanted to leave it late, and at the sight of her blue eyes shining just at the mention of the artists name, Lexa couldn't do anything but say yes.  
  
“No, it’s been interesting, Clarke, I’ve learnt a lot thanks to you.”  
  
“I’m sure you’ll forget it all, come morning.” She smiled. “I can be quite obnoxious when I talk about art, sorry if I’ve bored you.”  
  
“If I hadn't wanted to hear you talk about art, I wouldn’t have taken you here, don’t you think?” She asked rhetorically, lifting an eyebrow. “As I told you, I’ve always loved art, but I’ve never had the chance to indulge in it, thank you for sharing with me your knowledge.”  
  
“It’s just what I’ve learned in college.” Clarke shrugged. “Things I’ve read about, that I’ve studied and from which I take inspiration for my own paintings.”  
  
“Well, I know the opinion of a woman living of numbers doesn’t count a lot, but I really think that your paintings are amazing, Clarke.”  
  
Clarke couldn't help the light blush spreading on her cheeks at her praise, she had no clue why those words from Lexa had such an effect on her. She cleared her throat and walked ahead in the room, butterflies in her stomach when her eyes found the first painting.  
  
“God… it’s breathtaking.” She whispered, lost in the colours perfection. “Vincent Van Gogh’s talent was immense. I still can’t believe that his paintings were considered mediocre, whilst he was alive.”  
  
Lexa smiled. “I have the feeling that he’s your favorite artist.” She asked, interested.  
  
Clarke nodded. “My thesis was about him, I’ve studied his works in details.” She pointed to the painting in front of her, inviting Lexa to step at her side. “This one, for example _'Restaurant de la Sirène ad Asnières',_ Van Gogh painted it to experiment new techniques he learned during his stay in Paris.  
  
Lexa was bewildered, Clarke's voice was like a caress on her skin, so deep and passionate.  
  
“It’s called pointillism: a technique started around 1885 in which the colors are deconstructed in dots.” she explained. “With a little focus, you can see the difference from his other paintings.”  
  
“What makes him your favorite, Clarke?” Lexa asked softly. “What about him and his works made you realize he was the right artist for you?”  
  
“He was a peculiar man. He believed that technical ability shouldn’t be art’s purpose, but just the tool to express something higher.” Clarke smiled. “Once he said: _I am always doing what I cannot do yet, in order to learn how to do it._ And again _I try more and more to be myself, caring relatively little whether people approve or disapprove.”_ she quoted.  
  
Lexa stared intently at her, completely charmed, she’d never met a woman like Clarke before, so filled with fire and passion.  
  
“Even if the impressionist’s paintings gave him new values for his own work, he never completely joined that movement, he wanted do be faithfully himself, to his heart and mind, to his own way of seeing things.” Clarke went on, turning to her. “That’s what I’ve always tried to do, since the first time I started drawing when I was six years old and since I’ve learned the art of painting.”  
  
“I think it’s beautiful.” Lexa nodded.  
  
Silence fell as they just admire that work of art, Lexa checked the clock on her wrist and let out a sigh.  
  
“The museum will close in half an hour.” She said softly. “Would you like to show me his other works?” Clarke nodded, hooking an arm with hers, without thinking, and leading her around the room.  
  
Lexa tried to ignore the little shiver running down her spine at that casual contact.  
  
Clarke forced her heart not to beat to fast at the feeling of warm skin against hers.  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
Checking in the hotel they were going to spend the night in, Clarke was been surprised to find that Lexa had booked two rooms instead of one. Even though the rooms communicated through a door, Clarke had appreciated Lexa’s gesture: it seemed she had some sort of morality, after all.  
  
They got changed for the evening, and since Lexa refused to tell her anything about their plans, except that she would need comfortable shoes, Clarke had opted for a casual look: jeans, tennis shoes and a white turtleneck sweater.  
  
A soft knock on the door made her jump. She fixed the curls falling on her shoulders and checked her make-up before opening the door.  
  
“Are you ready? Or maybe you need a little more time?” Lexa asked kindly.  
  
Clarke shook her head, forcing her eyes not to stare at the beauty of the woman in front of her. “Just, let me get my purse.” She said, turning her back to Lexa, trying to steady her pulse.  
  
She was more than aware of Lexa’s beauty, it was too obvious to deny: with those emerald green eyes, her perfect hair and her innate elegance. But every time Clarke had met with her, she’d always wore her perfectly starched suit, even that morning at the museum, this… this was different.  
  
She gave her a sideway glance and seeing her talking softly with Adam, she decided to take her time to study her. A pair of deep gray skinny jeans, were hugging her legs like they were painted on her, a night blue shirt underlined her perfect torso, she wore a pair of black and white oxford on her feet and an open leather jacket, and her beautiful silky hair was left loose on her shoulders.  
  
“I'm ready.” Clarke finally muttered, clearing her throat and trying to regain control.  
  
Lexa was certainly not the first good-looking woman she had met, so it was time to compose herself and try to enjoy the evening and to be truthful, Clarke was quite curious to see what Lexa had organized. She closed the door and put the key card in the pocket of jeans.  
  
“And your purse?” Lexa asked.  
  
Clarke blushed. “I realized that I didn't need it.” She replied quickly.  
  
Lexa smiled amused and nodded. “Adam is waiting for us, this way.”  
  
When the elevator doors closed in front of Clarke, she bit her bottom lip and took a deep breath.

 

  
If the museum had been a surprise, what Clarke had in front of her, was equally surprising: Montmartre at night was something for which she wasn't prepared.  
  
Lexa had proposed eating something and made her sit in a beautiful and intimate restaurant, where she had translated the plates and Clarke had tried to speak French, triggering the hilarity of both. They ate quietly and Lexa asked her again a few artistic questions, reaffirming her desire to learn to paint. They drank good wine and when the waitress asked them if they wanted dessert, Lexa shook her head and asked for the bill.  
  
“Since your affection is for cakes.” Lexa began marching from the inside pocket of her jacket for the wallet. “I want you to taste a French cake that I'm sure you'll like a lot.”  
  
“And what makes you think I want a piece of cake?” Clarke asked with a raised eyebrow.  
  
“I'm pretty sure you would never say no to a piece of cake.” She remarked, resting her credit card on the table and laughed when she saw Clark's eyes light up.  
  
The waitress came up a few seconds later and Clarke saw Lexa talk to her in French. It took several minutes before she could pay the bill and finally Lexa put the card in her wallet and got up.  
  
“So ... no cake?” She asked amused, going around the table to move her chair.  
  
Clarke rolled her eyes and got to her feet, find herself a few centimeters from Lex's face. “I accept, but just because it will never happen to me again to have a piece of French cake in Paris.”  
  
Lexa laughed and just as she had done a few hours earlier held out her arm and Clarke accepted it without worrying.

And outside they were hit by a multitude of smells, sounds and images.  
  
Clarke looked around with admiration, observing people walking and chatting; her eyes pointed on the street artists who were drawing, dancing and entertaining people. The neighborhood was full and she wondered if there was a particular reason for that crowd, Lexa, as if she had read her mind, proceeded to fill the empty spaces.  
  
“In Paris at this time of year we celebrate the _'Fête des vendanges de Montmartre.'_ ” Lexa said in her perfect French language. “The festival of harvest.” she added as a translation with a sweet smile. “This festival takes place every year in October, since 1934, with the wines produced in the vineyard is located on that hill.”  
  
“Oh, wow ...” Clarke whispered admiringly, as they made their way through the crowd.  
  
“I fell in love at first sight when my father took me the first time when I was ten. After he died, I no longer have anyone to come here with.” She explained. “So as soon as I turned eighteen and I was able to use my inheritance independently, I started to come every year.” _  
  
_ Clarke looked up at her, beginning to understand why Lexa had chosen Paris to start their week.  
  
“So I wanted to come this year as well.” She said, staring in front, eyes trying to hide from Clarke's.  
  
Determined not to go into that and not too push the conversation, Clarke squeezed her arms to attract her attention.  
  
“So we can drink good wine all evening?” Clarke asked curiously.  
  
“If that's what you want, of course.”  
  
“Well, obviously I also want the piece of cake that I was promised.”  
  
Lexa smiled. “All right, then you'd better follow me, Miss Griffin.” She said, amused.  
  
“Good heavens, this thing is absolutely delicious.” Clarke groaned, taking the fork to her lips.  
  
“I'm glad you enjoy it.” Lexa murmured staring at her amused. “It's called clafoutis.” She said. “It's my favorite, I think I make a diet based on this every year I come here.”  
  
Clarke licked her lips. “You're not eating.” She remarked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
“It was your turn to taste it.”  
  
“This is absolutely unacceptable.” Clarke declared.  
  
“Clarke, reall-”  
  
Lexa stopped when the plastic fork leaned on her lips and she remembered the morning at Starbucks a few weeks earlier. Lexa opened her mouth and took the piece of cake and she closed her eyes when the familiar taste touched her tongue, bringing to mind a vivid picture of her father.  
  
“Thank you.” she murmured softly, smiling at her.  
  
Clarke stared at her for a long time and finally found herself split the cake with her, not caring that she spent the time feeding her. _  
  
_  
  


They continued their walk in the district and Clarke did not miss a single sound, losing herself in the colors that the artists were painting on canvas, watching the kids runing around happy and people talking, shouting and singing to the rhythm of the melody that the musicians were creating.   
  
And while they were reaching the top of Sacre Coeur, Clarke stopped in front of a table and began to talk to the seller - and the woman surprisingly spoke English - and she began to move her hands, full of admiration and interest in that unknown woman and Lexa smiled.

  
All of Clarke fascinated her, she was able to put people at ease and the thing that attracted more Lexa was her love for life, something Lexa had not for a long time. Her enthusiasm was contagious and seemed to enjoy the pleasure of small things every day.  
  
“Is everything okay?” Lexa asked when she saw Clarke smile to the woman and gave her a small leather bracelet, ready to walk away.  
  
Clarke nodded and suddenly the problem hit Lexa in here face. She spoke to the woman in French and after what seemed a little negotiation, Lexa gave her a couple of Euros and the woman gave her the bracelet. When she reached Clarke, who had stopped to look at a couple of guys who were doing portraits for tourists, she handed her the little bag.  
  
“Lexa, no-”  
  
Lexa held up a hand to stop her. “I was an idiot, I didn't even think about reminding you to bring your credit card.” She explained. “Consider a loan, okay? You liked it, you wanted it but you did not have your wallet with you, I understand.” She assured her.  
  
Clarke took the bag and bit her bottom lip. “When we get to the hotel.” She said with no chance to reply.  
  
“When we get to the hotel.” Lexa reassured.  
  
“My friend Lincoln will love it!” Clarke finally exclaimed, showing her the beautiful leather bracelet, as they resumed walking.  
  
Lexa just smiled and followed her, step by step.  
  
  
  
  
"Maybe I should take a bottle of wine to my lawyer." Lexa murmured looking at the starry sky from the top of the Sacre Coeur.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes. “She's a woman who appreciates wine?” She asked, letting the smells of that wonderful place investing her.  
  
Lexa chuckled. “She's one of those women who would drink everything actually.” She said, amused. “But I'm sure she'd love to, she could use it for a special evening with her wife.”  
  
“Then you have your answer.” Clarke agreed.  
  
Silence fell again and Lexa let her gaze wander down, before checking her watch: she was sure that the fireworks show was about to begin. She turned her face and lost staring Clarke, letting herself be captivated by her beauty, her blonde hair that fell in small waves on her shoulders, the long eyelashes and her nose and God ... the mole, Lexa would be happily going mad just to be able to kiss it.  
  
And then she saw Clarke shiver. “You are tired? You want to return to the hotel?” Lexa asked.  
  
Clarke shook her head. “I want to see the fireworks.”  
  
Lexa studied her trying to figure out what the problem was and when she saw Clarke shiver again, she realized that she was cold and she smiled. Without thinking twice she pulled off her jacket.  
  
“Do not even think about it.”  
  
“You're dying of a cold, Griffin." Lexa pointed out.  
  
“I wear a turtleneck sweater, unlike you! Your shirt barely covers your belly!” She continued scornfully. “We do not want the owner of the Woods Corporation getting sick, right?” Clarke said with humor.  
  
Lexa rolled her eyes and without another word, she draped the jacket over her shoulders. “I do not take no for an answer.” and with that Lexa ended the conversation, looking back at the sky.  
  
Clarke did not find an argument for reply, so she slid her arms into the jacket and she tried to hold back a little sigh when the familiar smell of Lexa came to her nose. She closed her eyes and buried her nose in the collar, just as the sky was flooded with thousands of colors.  
  
After the fireworks they decided it was time to get back to the hotel: the journey had been long enough and the time zones were starting to be felt. Lexa had asked Clarke to wait just long enough to be able to buy a bottle of wine for Anya and then she would call Adam and they could finally go to rest.

  
  


  
Clarke was lost again, staring  at one of the artists next to the stand where Lexa had stopped. She smiled when she saw a child sitting beside the boy, absorbed in drawing something with tempera. Maybe she could buy a bottle of wine for Finn.  
  
With that thought in mind, she took a few steps toward the store and she froze when she noticed what the child was painting: a bottle of wine.  
  
“ You can paint the bottles of wine ...” she whispered to herself and jumped when she felt a hand touch her shoulder. “God, you scared me to death!” Clarke gasped, putting a hand to his chest.  
Lexa raised an eyebrow. “I thought you heard me but obviously you were busy watching the little artist.” She said, pointing with a smile the child appeared to be quite concentrated.  
  
“ Little painters grow up fast.” Clarke agreed staring in admiration.  
  
“Do you like?” Lexa asked drawing her attention to what she was holding.  
  
Clarke studied it carefully and was surprised by the skill of those who had painted that label and before she could say anything, Lexa was prepared to fill the missing parts.  
  
“During the festival there is a chance to paint your own bottles.” she explained. “My father liked  it so much, he would bring home at least fifty to keep in our cellar for special events and trust me, in the Woods house, there was always a reason to celebrate.” She finished with a nostalgic smile.  
  
That was the moment when Clarke had an idea and she took Lexa's  hand. “Come with me.”  
  
Lexa nearly tripped over her own feet to the impetus and Clarke brought her in front of the artist again.  
  
“No, no, no.” Lexa shook her head realizing her intentions.  
  
“You said you wanted an art lesson, right?” Clarke asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
“ Here? Now?!” she asked. “I do not think it is the right plac-”   
  
“Do not be silly.” Clarke said shortly pushing Lexa sitting on one of the stools. “Every moment is good for art. Give me the bottle.” When she saw the confused look of Lexa's face, she rolled her eyes. “Come on, give it to me.” she commanded.  
  
Defeated , Lexa handed the bottle and l ooked at Clarke who quickly ran away,  before coming back with another bottle of wine in her hand.    
  
“Here.” Clarke handed her the bottle and the label was empty from the drawings. “There's nothing better than a personalized gift that comes from the heart.”  
  
Lexa stood still, she did not even know what to do. Clarke smiled and took her place beside her, grabbing one of the palettes and some tubes of paint.  
  
“Let me help you.” Clarke sprayed a couple of colors on one side and took a fine brush handing it to her.  
  
Lexa squeezed it between her fingers , still not knowing how to use it, but when Clarke's hand  touched against hers, Lexa felt the breath  hitch in her throat. When Clarke leaned forward, laying a hand on her thigh,  reaching the colors, she was hit by her  perfume , Lexa felt almost giddy.  
  
“Hold it tight.” Clarke whispered with a small voice. “Think about what you want to draw and then let it slip on the glass.” She instructed her.  
  
Always with their hands joined together, Lexa slid the brush on the glass, she had no artistic skills of any kind - excluding music - so probably because of their closeness, mixed of her incompetence, Anya would be found on her bottle just color without meaning.  
  
“More slight.” Clarke muttered. “Otherwise  the colour will smudge.”   
  
Lexa bit her bottom lip, watching the  girl's  profile so close, she was lost in her staring, unable to look away from Clarke's perfection.  
  
“Like this?” Lexa said, although she was not paying attention to what  she was doing, but she could feel Clarke's hands in her own.  
  
At that point Clarke stopped and looked up and she was lost in Lexa's green eyes: they were just a few centimeters from each other.  
  
“Gently, as if you were touching a lover that you  haven't seen in a long time.” Clarke whispered.  
  
Lexa looked at her and sighed softly. God, she would  give anything to make sure that Clarke was that lover she had not  seen in a long time, for permission to touch her, kiss her and do many other things. The beauty of Clarke always left her speechless, it was something Lexa had never tried and she was not prepared.    
  
“Show me.” She urged softly. “Show me how you would touch this lover, Clarke.”  
  
And the way Lexa's tongue  wrapped hard around the ‘ c ’  and ‘ k ’ sent a shiver down Clarke's spine. She was stuck in a difficult situation, something that was slipping quickly out of control...  
  
“Mom, look!”  
  
The child's voice, who was sitting not far from them, made her jump and Clarke caught the chance to get away from Lexa, releasing her grip on the brush and pushing aside the hand from the thigh.  
  
“I - I think you can keep going alone.” Clarke said hastily.   
_  
_ She got up and quickly walked away, telling her heart to calm down.  
  
  


 

They walked down the hall in absolute silence all three, until Adam not greeted them in front of his hotel room and letting them continue to walk alone. The journey in the car had been without words, both  distracted by what had happened.  
  
Clarke was beginning to feel the burden of the day and the intensity of the emotions that had begun to fill her body. That night had certainly not helped her to calm down. She stopped at the door and she had to strain to not breathe a sigh of relief to the idea of being able to stay a little bit alone: that would be the best way to calm down.  
  
She pulled the key from the pocket of  her jeans and slipped it into the lock. Clarke looked at the small light turn green, she could clearly feel the presence of Lexa behind her.  
  
What was  she supposed to tell her? Thank you for the day? It wasn't a date.  
  
Give her  a good night and slip into the room without further explanation?  
  
Give her maybe, a simple nod?  
  
Fortunately it was Lexa to remove her from that enigma. “See you tomorrow. You want to have breakfast downstairs on in your room?” She asked.  
  
“I'll be downstairs.” Clarke said. “See you tomorrow, good night and t-thanks.” She  added the last word with a small whisper.  
  
Lexa smiled, leaned over and took Clarke's hand in her, taking to her lips. “Good night, Clarke.” She whispered to the her skin before letting go.  
  
She said nothing else, she gave her another little glance and then walked  towards her room, disappearing and closing the door behind her.  
  
Clarke followed her example, the skin of her hand still burned from Lexa's touch, her heart was beating fast. She leaned against the door and she put her hands to her face before sighed deeply.  Her body was experiencing reactions that Clarke would have gladly avoided.  
  
But how could she avoid if she liked it or not, everything that Alexandria Woods did was charming her? _  
  
_  
  


 


	6. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a weekend of rest, I decided to continue. The various updates will not be so fast but I I'll try to do my best to at least one chapter a week.
> 
> Second stop of their week

**Chapter 5  
  
**

Lexa drew her fingers along the keyboard of her computer, looking at the endless number of windows that were written on the document at her side. The sun filtered through the large open window, letting the sound of the sea made her company.

  
She had tried to keep herself away from her duties; but to be the president of a company such as the Woods Corporation, didn't allow her to have much free time, so she had taken advantage of Clarke's absence to finish some work.  
  
Lexa took a long sip of coffee and toyed with her pen looking at the budget in front of her carefully, when her cell phone began to ring, drawing her attention and tearing a smile when she saw Anya's name.  
  
She clicked on the blue icon with an S and waited patiently for the program to start, she wrote a text to Anya, before returning to her duties. Ten minutes passed, and the familiar ringing of the video calling caught her attention, forcing her to push the answer button.  
  
Anya's face appeared on the computer screen and Lexa smiled ,amused to see her pajamas, something she was sure she only wore for not answering her in underwear.   
  
“Good morning.” Lexa greeted her with a small smile, earning in return a grimace. “Cute pajamas.” she added, amused.  
  
“You called to give me fashion advice or you have something useful to tell me?”  
  
“Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” Lexa asked.  
  
“You'd be in a bad mood if your boss was on vacation across the ocean and asked you to do a video conference at this hour in the morning.”

“About that, sorry." Lexa replied. “But I'm going out soon and I don''t know when I'll be back.” She explained. "I just wanted to be updated on the progress.”  
  
Anya rubbed her hand through her hair and Lexa saw her open a folder above the keyboard, she started reading and before she could says something, Raven appeared on the screen.  
  
“Good morning!” Raven said cheerfully, turning to Lexa, placing a cup of coffee in front of her wife and then bent down to kiss her softly.  
  
“Good morning to you.” Lexa replied amused, watching Raven wearing just a shirt, did not leave much to imagination.  
  
“Hey, Woods,” the lawyer called, snapping her fingers to get her attention. “Your eyes on me, not on my wife's ass!”

Lexa didn't have the time to answer that, Raven appeared again with a plate which at first glance, looked like pancakes.  
  
“Can you blame her?” Raven asked. “I have a beautiful ass.” She laughed.   
  
Raven allowed Lexa to see the object of the statement raising her shirt and showing her backside.   
  
“I should take a picture.” Lexa agreed raising an eyebrow. “Actually, wait ...” she leaned toward the table to grab her phone.

“Take a picture of this.” Anya replied, showing her middle finger, while with her other hand, she grabbed the butt cheek of her wife.  
  
“Oh, come on!” Lexa muttered throwing a paper against the computer screen, but in her eyes there was happiness  
  
When the two women had started dating, Raven was just the girlfriend of her best friend. But things had progressed, the two were in love and the girl had become a trusted person for Lexa, enough to be named best woman when they were married.  
  
She had always envied their relationship, how they loved each other. If Lexa was honest, she prayed all the time to have such luck one day. If she had found a woman who loved her half as much as the two loved each other, she would be happy forever.  
  
“Okay, okay!” Lexa said when she saw that Anya didn't seem too willing to stop kissing Raven. “Let's talk about business for ten minutes and then I swear I'll leave you two to have breakfast in peace.”  
  
Raven smiled against Anya's lips, before turning away from her and leaned towards the computer screen and blew Lexa a kiss, and then she walked away in perfect silence.  
  
Anya looked back at Lexa giving her a grin. “So?”  
  


 

Clarke looked out the window and admired the fact that she could see the Mediterranean sea from her hotel room; Washington was fifty kilometers away from the sea and she had never had the monetary means that allowed such luxury.  
  
When they landed that morning, Clarke was left completely speechless: Lexa had brought her to this wonderful hotel and apologized for the stop, telling her that she had an important thing to do and reassured her that they would leave in a few hours. Clarke was fascinated by the beauty of the place and told her that she would not mind spending the day there, maybe take a dip in the Mediterranean sea since she had finally the opportunity to enjoy the beauty of Monte Carlo.   
  
Adam had accompanied her to the city streets in search of swimsuits, while Lexa had stayed in the hotel to attend to some work and Clarke wasn't sorry that she had stayed in the room. She had welcomed the idea of being alone, and Adam was a man of few words, but just like the way he had followed her around, Clarke had the thought that his services were not limited just as Lexa's driver.   
  
Clarke looked at the ipad Lexa had provided, and she made a mental calculation of what time it was in Washington. She could call Finn or Octavia to see what had happened at the appointment with the doctor.  
  
Clarke jumped when she heard clearly heard Lexa laugh coming from the next room and she looked back at door that was left half open. She bit her bottom lip curious to know who was able made Alexandria Woods laugh like that.  
  
She pushed the door open slightly and looked inside: Lexa was sitting at the large glass table, the computer in front of her and a sweet smile painted on her lips. Because of the reflection of the sun, she could not see the other person, but she recognized the voice: Raven.  
  
“Miss Woods.” Adam began from the bar, where he poured a drink. “Miss Griffin is waiting for her excursion.” He informed.  
  
“I'm aware of that, Adam, thank you.” Lexa said. “Why don't you see if she's ready? I'll finish up here in a couple of minutes.”  
  
Adam turned to looked her. “As you wish.” She replied, taking a glass to her lips and then his eyes met Clarke's across the room and a small smile curved his lips.  
  
Clarke stepped back, caught in the act and blushed violently, walking quickly toward the window, trying to put more space between her and Lexa's room. She watched the sea again and sighed: she did not know what the plans were, but she certainly had something in mind.  
  
  


****  
  
  
Definitely sitting at the bar of the hotel on the beach in Monte Carlo, during the hottest hours of the day, was not what Lexa had in mind. If she had known Clarke's desire was to go to the beach, Lexa would have insisted on leaving.  
  
She was not a beach person, she didn't remember the last time she had been there and that would be evidence enough. Lexa sighed heavily and she fixed her sunglasses, observing people, waiting patiently for Clarke to show.  
  
Adam had informed Lexa that Clarke would join her in a few minutes. When he reached the room to ask her to join Lexa, Adam had found her ia call with Finn, and he had decided not to disturb any further.  
  
So Lexa had taken her time to wear something more appropriate, something that was not one of her usual suits and sat at the bar, taking a seat and had something cold to drink.  
  
And if the beach was not in her plans, seeing Clarke wearing a swimsuit that left nothing to her imagination, was definitely something she had not planned on doing in the near future. Lexa was unable to help herself, leaned forward on the chair and moved her glasses on the nose, allowing her to look at Clarke better.  
  
Clarke was magnificent.  
  
Her body was perfect, her firm legs and her breasts ... Lexa looked away quickly, when she saw Clarke watching her. She turned her head and in a hurry to find something to do, she raised her hand to take the glass but she knocked it over on the table.  
  
“Damn.” Lexa swore between her teeth, when the drink wet her swimsuit.  
  
Lexa did not see the smile of Clarke's face but she felt her presence when she sat down at her side.  
  
“Sorry if I kept you waiting.” Clarke began, pulling out a pair of sunglasses from her purse. “I took advantage and made a couple of calls.”  
  
Lexa smiled at her and nodded. “You want something to drink?” She asked. “I definitely need to order another one seeing that I no longer have one.”  
  
Clarke raised an eyebrow. “You started to drink at this hour? Should I take it that you have problems with alcohol, miss Woods?” She teased.

  
“Totally non-alcoholic but refreshing.” Lexa explained. “If I had known you wanted to go to the beach, I probably would have left.”  
  
“You don't like the beach?! Everyone loves the beach!” Clarke exclaimed, shocked, looking at the beautiful view. “I never thought that I have the opportunity to drink in front the Mediterranean Sea.” She confessed.  
  
Lexa raised a hand to call the waiter. “Well then, if that's the case, you can order something.”  
  
Clarke nodded, leaning to the next table to grab a menu, and that movement showed Lexa all the side that had not had a chance to see previously, the side which was wrapped onto that ridiculously small swimsuit.  
  
Lexa closed her eyes and sighed.  
  
Lexa realized that her sanity would be sorely tested when she found herelf lying on the deck chairs, watching a wet Clarke lying on the sand a few steps away from her. Lexa was aware that she had to look away, but she was attracted to that perfect skin.  
  
Lexa's eyes did nothing but follow the small salty drops, go along Clarkes's neck, her breasts and then her legs. She took a shaky breath and took a long sip of her drink, the liquid gave her a bit of refreshment but it was momentary, so she decided to get up and get away from Clarke.  
  
Lexa walked up to the shore and let the water cool tickle her feet, she closed her eyes and turned her face to the sky, wondering if she should go for a swim. She jumped in fright when the water hit her belly and she opened hes eyes, finding in front of her a child.  
  
“I'm sorry.” Said the child in front of her, looking at the ball that was dragged ashore by the waves.  
  
Lexa bent to pick up the ball and smiled. “Nothing happened.” She assured her. “What's your name?”  
  
“Gabrielle.”  
  
“Here's to you, Gabrielle.” She said, handing her the ball. “I'm Lexa, nice to meet you.”  
  
“Nice to meet you.” She said more and more embarrassed.  
  
“You'd better go back to your friends or they will think you ran away with the ball.”  
  
Gabrielle looked her feet. “I'm on vacation with my parents.” She said. “And there are no children here ...” she murmured.  
  
“I understand, and yes, it's definitely not the best place for children.”  
  
Lexa asked herself what kind of parents bring a child to Montecarlo for the holidays, there was nothing interesting to do for them.  
  
“You want to play here with me?” Gabrielle asked hopefully.  
  
Lexa raised an eyebrow, and then she looked at Clarke who was lying in the sun. She was not going to spend all morning basking in the sight of the woman, even if she liked to look at her, it was dangerous for her mind.  
  
“I'd say you've found a playmate.” Lexa replied with a smile.  
  
  
  
Clarke blinked a few times and groaned at the sensation of heat on her skin, she rolled onto her back and stared at the sky behind her the sunglasses, before sitting on the sand. Falling asleep in the sun was definitely a bad idea, she was sure that come evening, she would regret it. She turned to look at the deck chairs, expecting to find Lexa, found it empty and she started to look around.   
  
Lexa was gone because she had fallen asleep? It would have been quite rude if she did ...  
  
Then she heard again Lexa's laughter - the same she had heard in the room a few hours earlier - and was completely speechless. Clarke saw something that made her breath stop in her throat and her heart ache in her chest. There were things on which she had absolutely no control, and for how she was striving to hate Lexa with all her strength.  
  
Lexa was kneeling in front of a blonde child who wore a frown on her face and her hands held a long stick.  
  
“Do not give up, you will not believe it but even me, the first time I tried, it went wrong.”   
  
Gabrielle pulled up her face and looked Lexa. “Really?” The girl whispered.  
  
Lexa looked down to grab her stick, giving time to Gabrielle to dry her tears without the fear of being seen.  
  
“Really and I cried a lot. You reacted much better than me.”  
  
Clarke stared at the two, interested.   
  
“Perfect. The important thing is not to give up at the first attempt, now try again.”   
  
Lexa stood up and took her position, immediately imitated by Gabrielle. Both took the stick in front of their bodies, parallel to the ground.  
  
Clarke could see the corner of Lexa's lips move into a smile. Together, the woman and the child slid the stick between their fingers and made it a full arc over their heads, turning to deliver a blow to the ground. Always in sync, they stood up and repeated the same movement, swinging their body to strike another blow on the opposite side.  
  
Clarke was simply enchanted.  
  
Clarke was full of admiration for the child and for her clear talent, she seemed able to follow Lexa's directions and movements with perfection, not without a certain physical and mental effort of course but nevertheless, Clarke was impressed.  
  
But no, it was not the child who was the object of Clarke Griffin's admiration.  
  
Lexa's body was a piece of art.  
  
There was not a single muscle of her body that was not sketched and sculpted, designed by years of training. There was not a single centimeter of Lexa's pale skin that was not covered with sweat.  
  
From her perch, Clarke could see the muscles of Lexa's back flexing with the movements of the stick, in an almost hypnotic dance that made her fingers itch.  
  
Lexa's body was screaming, or better demanded to be painted and Clarke decided not to fight that desire. She leaned toward her bag and began rummaging inside, finding a piece of paper and a pencil.  
  
She pointed her eyes on the two and without thinking any further, she began to draw and Clarke was making love with her own art and as her eyes followed Lexa's movements, she knew she could do it forever.  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
Clarke was not wrong to think that she would regret falling asleep in the sun, especially when her clothes rubbed painfully on her warm skin. She sighed heavily and prayed for Adam to return with the cream as soon as possible, because it was not going to survive the evening without a bit of refreshment. Clarke had spent a lot of time observing Lexa and the girl keep moving synchronously. She felt the need for a cold shower. Shower which probably wouldn't help her much, because she was literally on fire.   
  
When she heard a soft knock at the door, she nearly cried with joy as she walked barefoot to the door. But when she opened the door she was surprised not to be in front of the impassive face of Adam, but she found herself drowning in the beauty of a pair of green eyes that were gazing at her with interest.  
  
“Lexa ... what are you doing here?” She asked. “Adam said that he would be downstairs in half an hour.”  
  
“I know.” She reply. “But I was at the bar, having a drink with an old friend of my father and I saw Adam who was bringing you this.” Lexa said, pointing to the cream in her hand. “So I came to check that my date had not become a lobster.”  
  
Clarke rolled her eyes and snatched away the cream from her hands. “I have to say that discretion is not one of his best qualities.” She argued.  
  
Lexa smiled amused. “Let's say that Adam is not good at hiding things, and not just becasue I'm his boss.”  
  
There was a moment of awkward silence until Clarke stepped aside in a clear invitation. Lexa took a few hesitant steps into the room, surprised that Clarke had let her in and heard the door close behind her.  
  
It was no different from her room, maybe just a more messy and Lexa found herself smiling. The suitcase had been laid on the bed and clothes were spread out on the mattress, while three pairs of shoes had been abandoned on the floor near the nightstand. When she saw Clarke open the cream and place herself in front of the big mirror, pulling down one of the shoulder pads, Lexa turned to stare at the window, focusing her gaze on the beach, giving her privacy.  
  
“Would you mind helping me?” She asked. “I can't reach my back.”  
  
Lexa took a deep breath and nodded, crossing the distance and settling herself behind the girl. She stood still for a few seconds, unsure of what to do and she found herself shaking when she saw Clarke move her hair to the side, exposing her bare back.  
  
“You can pull the shoulder pads.” She said softly.  
  
Lexa slid one and then the other, looking at Clarke place her hands on her chest to prevent the dress falling down from her chest. She put the cream on her hands and then with courage. she put her fingers on the hot skin of Clarke's back, watching her shiver.  
  
“Does it hurt?” Lexa asked with concern.  
  
“It's just annoying.” She replied. “It's itching.”  
  
Lexa focused on what she was doing, trying to ignore how soft Clarke's skin felt under her fingertips. “You are really beautiful in this dress.” Lexa said in a whisper.  
  
It was a vague attempt to focus on something else, but that did not make the words less true: with that blue dress that came just below her knees, her hair fell to her shoulders in graceful curls and the makeup that stood out her blu eyes ...  
  
“You too.” Clarke muttered, looking at her through the mirror.  
  
And that was to put it mildly: the black suit she was wore made gave full justice to Lexa and the blue bow tie that was tied to her neck, was the only thing - in addition to the shirt - to give a touch of color to her outfit.  
  
“And without doing it on purpose, you matched the tie with my dress.” She continued in a whisper.  
  
Lexa swallowed hard, running her fingers along Clarke's back and when it was all too intense for her, she stepped back, clearing her throat. “You feel better?” She asked.  
  
Clarke stared at her for a long time through the mirror and nodded slowly. “Thank you.”  
  
Lexa gave her a small smile and set her bow tie, before heading for the door, her fingers still trembled after touching that beautiful skin. “I'll see you when you're ready.” She said, grabbing the doorknob.  
  
And then Lexa left the room.  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
After Clarke joined Lexa downstairs, they shared a quiet dinner at the hotel’s restaurant, and then Adam drove them to Montecarlo’s Casinò. If visiting Paris has been a pleasant surprise, being in front of that gorgeous building, it took her breath away.  
  
Clarke bit her lower lip, while stepping through the entrance at Lexa’s arm, not even in her wildest dreams she had dreamed of visiting such a place. For a moment she felt out of place, she wasn't used to places like that: people dressed in clothes more expensive than her own apartment, sparkling jewels and regal attitudes.  
  
She moved nervously, until she felt Lexa’s hand give hers a reassuring squeeze. “It’s okay.” She hummed. “Just relax, no one will mind us.”  
  
Clarke had her doubt about that: just the simple fact that Alexandria Woods has a new girl at her arm would probably drive a lot of eyes in their direction. Even if they were in Europe, Clarke was sure that her surname was known, but since she didn’t have any proof of that, she took a deep breath and tried to relax.  
  
“I’ve never been in a place like this.” She admitted. “And I have no clue on how to play.”  
  
Lexa smiled. “Well, I’m here for a reason.” She answered, guiding her through the hall. “Just tell me what would you like to play and I’ll teach you.”  
  
Clarke glanced around, curious, looking at the tables crowded with well dressed people. “That one.” She pointed.  
  
“Black Jack, good choice.” Lexa commented. “Okay, let’s go.” She quickly escorted her to the table, and they waited for the game to end.  
  
Some angry people freed two chairs, and Lexa quickly offered one to Clarke, and sat next to her.  
  
“Just one bet.” Lexa said to the dealer, putting two fiches on the table. “I’ll show you how it works, when you understand, you can make your own bet.”she explained to Clarke.  
  
Clarke watched interested as the dealer gave each player, from left to right, an uncovered card, finally taking one for himself and then proceeding to ask each player their intention. Clarke watched Lexa thinking about her move, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration.  
  
“Card.” She finally said.  
  
The dealer uncovered another card for her, taking Lexa's points to sixteen. Lexa raised a hand, signaling him to stop, and the dealer went on to the next player.  
  
“Now, when everyone has the highest possible score, that can’t be more than twenty one.” Lexa explained in a soft whisper. “The dealer will uncover their own cards, and must hit until the cards total seventeen or more points.” She went on, a little smile spreading on her lips as the dealer scored more than twenty one points. “A player may win by having any final score equal to or less than twenty one if the dealer busts, as he did right now. So now he has to pay all the bet on the table.”  
  
Clarke watched as the man did so, while the players gave the cards back.  
  
“If the player and dealer have the same total, this is called a _push_ , and the player typically does not win or lose money on that hand. If all available players bust, the hand ends automatically without the dealer having to play. If the dealer doesn't bust, he’ll just pay the bet of players with a score higher than his own and collect the bet of those with a lower score.” Lexa went on. “What do you think? If you want I can make another bet and then let you try.” She offered.  
  
Clarke nodded and watched the game interested, her back shivered.  
  
Clarke spent the most of the night at that table, Lexa stayed at her side for a while, before getting up after excusing herself to follow a man who came and whispered something in her ear. Clarke went on playing alone, betting the achievements of her winning, until she grew bored and collected her riches from the table.  
  
She looked for Lexa, and unconcerned in not seeing her, she joined with Adam who had spent the night at the bar. She enjoyed his silent presence, seating beside him and sipping on a drink. She finally noticed his intent gaze pointing a table on the fare side of the room and following it she wasn't surprised to see Lexa, apparently engrossed in what seemed to be a poker game.  
  
So, Adam had actually spent the night at the bar watching over Lexa.  
  
“I don’t mean to overstep.” She stated, forcing his eyes on her. “But, judging on how you bear yourself, the way you always keep her in your sight, and the fact that you spent the whole night sitting at the bar watching over her, you couldn’t possibly be just Lexa’s personal driver.”  
  
A little smile appeared on Adam’s lips. “You caught me, miss Griffin.” He answered.  
  
Clarke sipped on her drink. “Are you her bodyguard?”  
  
The man glanced once more to his employer and then waved his glass at the bartender asking for a refill. “Among other things.” He finally answered.  
  
Clarke’s brow furrowed. “Among other things? What else do you do for her?” she asked curious.  
  
The stare Adam gave her was so intense that she felt the need to look away from it’s power. “I’m her driver, her bodyguard, the person who makes sure she is never in need of anything, the person who looks after her.” He finally said, giving a thankful nod to the bartender.  
  
Clarke was surprised by that answer, but before she could ask more, Adam went on.  
  
“I’ve known Miss Woods since she was born, I’ve been at her father’s service for many years.” He explained. “After Mr. Woods’ death, I’ve seen her turning from scared child to angry teenager and finally , a strong, independent woman.” He went on toying with the glass in his hands.  
  
Clarke took a glance at the woman in question, loosing herself in the details of her her straight back, and the way the long fingers of a hand was wrapped around a glass of whisky, while the other hand held the cards.  
  
She looked so powerful and sure, she looked dangerous.  
  
Alexandria Woods was as gorgeous as she was dangerous, for her especially, and Clarke was sure that if she had allowed it, the flame that was that woman would have consumed her alive. That thought bring back the memory of what had happened earlier in her hotel room, the way the simple touch of Lexa’s fingers had set her skin aflame. And for a moment, just one instant, she wondered how it would have felt letting the fire flare up.  
  
“After her father’s death I could have found another job, something that would allow me to have my own family, but I just couldn’t.”  
  
Adam’s voice brought her back to reality, Clarke swallowed, banishing the crazy thoughts at once. She had no intention to give Lexa the chance to take control, and at the end of the week, willing or not, their roads were going to part.  
  
“I just couldn't leave Miss Alexandria to the hands of her uncle and cousin, so I stay.”  
  
“For good.” Clarke ended for him, staring at him.  
  
Adam smiled, swallowing the remains of his whisky in a long gulp. “Someone has to keep an eye on her.” He joked getting up. “And on you too, Miss Griffin, what are you doing here, talking with a boring man like me, instead of enjoying yourself?” He asked.  
  
Clarke shrugged. “Lexa is busy with poker, and I’ve never been in a Casino before, so I don’t really know what to do with myself.”  
  
“Come on, then, let me show you my favorite game.” He invited, offering his hand to her.  
  
“What about Lexa?” She asked confused, letting him take her hand.  
  
“Miss Woods is between friends, no harm will come to her.” He explained, gesturing to the people sitting with her. “Her father’s old friends.” He said. “No one will ever do anything to hurt her, they’re just enjoying the game.”  
  
At those words, Clarke couldn't see any reason not to follow him around the room.  
  
Under that serious and calm appearance, Adam revealed himself to be a very pleasant company, Clarke exchanged a few joke with him and the both of them had a good time bidding at the Roulette. Just when their challenge was getting heated, a man approached them an Adam excused himself away. Ten minutes and a few losing bidding later, Clarke collected her remaining riches and left the table, looking for at least one of her two companions.  
  
She finally found the both of them at the bar, Lexa was talking to someone, Adam at her side, rigid and impeccable as usual. Not wanting to interrupt their conversation, she approached the bar looking for more liquid courage: at least alcohol has never left her alone during the night, it also helped her forget how bad her shoulders were burning. She kept track of the time by the number of glasses of champagne she was drinking: five. She was about to order the sixth, when she felt Lexa’s presence next to her, so instead of waving her glass to the bartender, she turned to face her.  
  
“How much did you have?”  
  
Clarke’s eyebrow raised. “Are you my nanny?” She asked a little too harshly.  
  
Lexa furrowed at the tone giving the bartender a stare that shooed him away before he could refill Clarke’s glass. Clarke folded her arms on her chest, turning to her, irritated, ready to remind her that she wasn't in charge and that she had no right to tell her how much she could or couldn’t drink.  
  
“I’m really sorry for leaving you alone all night long.” Lexa started before she could talk. “That’s why I didn’t really want to stay, I rarely come here and the few times I do, all my father’s old friends want to know about the business.” She explained. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Clarke let out a deep sigh: she had no right to feel sidelined, she should be grateful not to have to spend all the time with her, but something inside of her was really irritated.  
  
“Doesn’t matter, as I said, you’re not my nanny.” She shrugged.  
  
“I saw Adam showed you how roulette works.” Lexa went on, ignoring her resentful tone. “Is there something else you would like to try?” She asked politely.  
  
Clarke shook her head, trying to get the bartender's attention, even though he seemed determined to ignore her.  
  
“Let me show you my favorite game, I promise, you’ll like it.”Lexa insisted, stepping back while buttoning her jacket and tilting her head to the side. “Are you coming?” She offered her hand with a little smile.  
  
Clarke got up ignoring her hand, and Lexa nodded, walking towards to a big oval table crowded with people. Clarke saw her putting a hand on a man’s shoulder and muttering something in his ear, the man gave her a little bow and went away with his partner.  
  
“Dice...” Clarke murmured.  
  
“Precisely.” Lexa answered.  
  
She produced a handful of riches from her pocket, putting them on the table and giving a wave to the croupier, asking for a pair of dice.  
  
Lexa toyed with the dice between her fingers. “So, it’s pretty simple: the player holding the dice is called shooter, while acting as the shooter, a player must have a bet on the "Pass" line and/or the "Don't Pass" line. Each round has two phases: "come-out" and "point". To start a round, the shooter makes one or more "come-out" rolls. The shooter must shoot toward the farther back wall and is generally required to hit the farther back wall with both dice. Both dice must be tossed in one throw. If only one die is thrown the shot is invalid. A come-out roll of 2, 3 or 12 is called "craps" or "crapping out", and anyone betting the Pass line loses. Shooters may keep rolling after crapping out, the dice are only required to be passed if a shooter sevens out (rolls a seven after a point has been established). A come-out roll of 7 or 11 is a "natural", the Pass line wins and Don't Pass loses. The other possible numbers are the point numbers: 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, and 10.”  
  
Clarke was staring at her, transfixed, Lexa’s voice was almost hypnotizing.  
  
“If the shooter rolls one of these numbers on the come-out roll, this establishes the "point" - to "pass" or "win", the point number must be rolled again before a seven.  
  
The dealer flips a button to the "On" side and moves it to the point number signifying the second phase of the round. If the shooter "hits" the point value again before rolling a seven, the Pass line wins and a new round starts. If the shooter rolls any seven before repeating the point number (a "seven-out"), the Pass line loses, the Don't Pass line wins, and the dice pass clockwise to the next new shooter for the next round.”  
  
“Are you ready?” The croupier asked impatiently.  
  
Lexa nodded. “I’ll have the first round.” She offered. “I promise, it’s easier than it sounds.”  
  
She toyed for a moment longer with the dice in her hand, before rolling them along the table. The dice hit the far wall, bouncing back before stopping: **2  
  
** “Ah, dammit!” Lexa swore, watching the croupier collect her riches and gave back the dice to her.  
  
“Let me try.” Clarke asked, a new confidence in her voice. “I want to try.”  
  
Lexa stepped aside, giving her room and Clarke took the dice, holding them in her closed fist, closing her eyes she smacked a kiss on her knuckles and threw them. They watched the dice roll in silence until they stopped on the green table: **11  
  
** “Yes!” She exclaimed turning to her. “Have you seen that?!”  
  
“Good Job!” Lexa smiled. “Now give me a point number!” She encouraged.   
  
The people around the table watched as she repeated what she’d done before: fist, kiss, throw.  
  
 **8  
  
** “Win.” The croupier exclaimed. “Another bet?”  
  
Clarke turned to her for approval and Lexa gave her a nod and a smile. “Another bet.” Clarke confirmed, confident.  
  
Bet after bet, the pile of riches in front of her grew and lots of people stopped by to watch the girl whose luck seemed to never fail.  
  
Clarke couldn't stop, the blind Goddess seemed to be in her favor that night, and even though she had also her share of losses, she had managed to collect a great number of riches and she had no intention of stopping soon. At her side, Lexa had slipped out of her jacket and rolled the sleeves of her shirt, and was looking at her as if she had never seen anything as gorgeous in her entire life. The light sparkling in Clarke’s eyes anytime she rolled the dice set her soul aflame as nothing else ever did before: it was something she’d never seen before.  
  
She jumped when Adam leant on her to whisper something in her ear, pointing to two men – security, without a doubt – staring at them, their arms folded on their chests. Lexa offered them a little smile, leaning in on Clarke.  
  
“One last round, Clarke.” She said, staring intently at her.  
  
“Why? I’m winning!” She mumbled, confused, throwing the dice.  
  
Lexa leaned closer “Exactly.” She explained.  
  
Clarke looked up from the table, spotting the two men staring at her with a not so pleased look and for an instant she felt like the lead character of a gambling movie, thrown out of the Casino for cheating.  
  
“Okay, last round.” Clarke conceded. “But…” she licked her lips, staring intently at her. “Can I make it more interesting?”  
  
Lexa lifted an eyebrow, curiously see what she had in mind, she was surprised to see her push all her riches to the center of the table.  
  
“You don’t have to ask for permission.” She offered. “You played, those are yours.”  
  
Clarke smiled amused and silently asked for the dice that the croupier gave her with a nod. “Last bet.” Clarke declared. “All in.”  
  
The table fell in an uneasy silence and Clarke turned to Adam who, with no need for words, gave her a glass of champagne.  
  
“I need some liquid courage.” She explained to Lexa, with a shrug, emptying the glass in a swallow before gripping the dice, ready.  
  
“Let me help you.” Lexa proposed, stepping behind her, chest against her back and hands above hers. “Give me a 7 or an 11, miss Griffin.” She whispered in her ear, in a calm voice.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes, barely holding back a small whimper at her sensual, calm voice; the hot skin she could feel against her back was giving a really hard time to her concentration.  
  
She clenched her fist around the dice, kissed her knuckles and threw.  
  
 **7  
  
** “Good job!” Lexa chuckled.  
  
A chuckle that reverberated straight in Clarke's bones, forcing her to hold herself to the table, afraid that her trembling legs won't hold.  
  
“Now a point number, Clarke, I know you can do it.”  
  
Clarke’s head was spinning, all those sensations would probably have her wasted soon. Lexa’s intoxicating scent, her hot breath on her ear, her firm body against hers, the way she pronounced her name and how their hands were still connected.  
  
“I’m sure it won’t be hard, miss Woods, with you as my lucky charm.” She whispered, holding the dice in her fist and offering it to her.  
  
Lexa stared at her for a long moment, before leaning in to kiss her knuckles, slowly, and careful to hold her gaze. For an instant Clarke felt as if she was lost in another dimension. When Adam noisily cleared his throat, Clarke tumbled out of her trance and, without breaking the eye contact with Lexa, not even for a second, threw the dice.  
  
The silence was broke by a round of cheer, that forced her to check her result: **6  
  
** A smile spread on her lips as she turned in Lexa's arms to hug her, before moving to Adam, hugging him as well while he stared surprised at her, but with a sweet smile on his lips.  
  
“Win.” The croupier announced, paying her bet.  
  
As promised, Clarke collected her riches, leaving the table, the stares of the security men burning a hole in her back. She would probably be upset about it, but Lexa’s hand was holding hers, sure, leading her through the room, heading for the bar.  
  
“Let’s celebrate your win, and leave: I have the sensation you’re no longer welcome here.” She pointed out.  
  
Clarke turned to glance at the security men, who seemed determined not to let her out of their gazes, she gave them a flirtatious smile.  
  
She had just won a load of money!  
  
  
  
Clarke closed her eyes and lifted her face to the sky, spinning around when a gentle breeze caressed her hot skin, she turned hearing a quiet chuckle behind her. Lexa was staring at her, amused, a few steps away Adam excused himself and went for the car, to finally take them back to the hotel.  
  
“I hope it was a pleasant day for you.” Lexa finally asked, untying her bow tie.  
  
“Very pleasant.” She answered with a light smile, looking at the sky.  
  
Lexa got close and without a word draped her jacket around her shoulders, earning a confused look from Clarke that remained unanswered at the sudden arrival of the car. Clarke accepted Lexa’s proffered arm, but just a few steps from the car something caught her eyes.  
  
“Give me a minute.” She asked, slipping from her hold.  
  
Lexa watched her stepping away to join what Lexa identified as an homeless woman. She watched Clarke talk kindly to the woman, until, to her awe, she produced the result of her win from her purse, handling it to the woman.  
  
The homeless woman took her hands to her mouth as tears streamed down her cheeks, the smile Clarke gave to that stranger stopped Lexa's heart right on the spot. When she got back, those blue eyes were veiled of unshed tears, and Lexa remained speechless in front of that view.  
  
Nobody would have ever done something like that, not in Lexa’s world.  
  
“She needed it more than me.” Clarke offered, rubbing her eyes as they reached the car. “And I remember all too well how it fells to have nothing. I know she will put it at good use.”  
  
“You are an exceptional woman, Clarke Griffin.” She simply stated, giving her an admired look, while opening the car door for her.  
  
Clarke blushed hiding behind the jacket’s collar: she didn’t want Lexa to see her so vulnerable. The champagne she had drank had already lowered her defenses.  
  
Clarke turned to look at her, before getting inside the car. “Have you already made plans for tomorrow?” She asked.  
  
“No, not yet, why?”  
  
Clarke bit down on her lower lip. “What do you think about Amsterdam?”  
  
The only answer she got was a smile and a lifted eyebrow.

 


	7. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, one week.  
> Third stop of their week

**Chapter 6**

 

Clarke buried her head in the pillow when a ray of sunlight hit her face and she moaned loudly. She was in a shitty state, her stomach was a mess and her head ached. She rolled between the fresh sheets and groaned. She tried to hide from the sun to the best of her ability.  
  
It was then that she realized two things:  
  
First, she was not in her bed.  
  
Second, she was not wearing any clothes.  
  
Clarke sat up on the bed and blinked a few times, focusing on the outlines of the room; she noticed a suit left on the chair and for a moment her heart sank.  
  
It was not very clear in her mind what had happened the night before, Clarke remembered only a few images but she could still feel the warmth of Lexa's body against hers and the way her eyes had taken her breath away several times.  
  
Clarke put her hand to her mouth and shook her head.  
  
Clarke was almost sure she had not slept with Lexa, even though, technically, she was in her bed without clothes. She swallowed and looked around in search of her clothes: she could not find them anywhere, and she came to the conclusion that if she could not find them in a reasonable time, she would otherwise have taken away the sheets from the bed and walk down the hall like this.  
  
She did not have time to ask further, because the door opened and when the figure appeared in front of her, Clarke could not help but moan. She was not really in the mood to have a confrontation, especially in that state, when her memories were still on the floor of the bar where they had spent most of their evening.  
  
“You're awake.”  
  
That was the only thing Lexa said, leaning her shoulder against the door and holding her mug of coffee.  
  
“How do you feel?” She asked genuinely concerned.  
  
“I'm fine.” She replied quickly.  
  
It would have been much better if she had been able to remember everything, if the black holes in her brain were filled with different pictures instead of hungry green eyes and moans.  
  
“Breakfast is waiting for you.” Lexa said after a long moment of silence, when she saw that the girl did not seem willing to answer her, she stepped back to go in the other room  
  
“Lexa ...” Clarke called. Lexa turned with a raised eyebrow, waiting for her to speak: she could see Clarke was upset. “We ... well, I'm in your bed without clothes, it means that we ... well, you know...”  
  
“You don't remember?” Lexa asked and a cheeky smile gleamed across her lips.  
  
“No, Lexa, I do not.”  
  
There was a long moment of silence and at the end Lexa turned again ready to go back to her breakfast. She decided to leave Clarke with the suspicion.  
  
“Too bad, it was pretty intense.” She said, and without another word, she disappeared into the other room.  
  
Clarke stared at the spot where Lexa had disappeared, her eyes wide and her heart was pounding in her chest.  
  
No, she refused to believe that it had happened, she had vowed to herself that she would not let the charm of Alexandria Woods possess her and she had always had a great tenacity.  
  
But then why she was in her bed with no clothes?  
  
Clarke dropped back on the pillow and moaned, with that movement her bra strap slipped on her shoulder and at that moment something clicked in her brain. She put her hands on her mouth and suddenly remembered everything.

  
  


****  
  
  
_The place was just as Clarke had imagined: soft lighting, background music not too high, a large stage was in the middle of the room, a long pole was placed in the center and some dancing girls were moving and entertaining customers._ _Clarke let her eyes wander all around, playing with her drink before taking the straw to her lips, sipping it slowly and stopped to look at the stage where a girl was dancing almost naked.  
  
__She was good-looking, long blond hair fell in locks over her shoulders and she was wearing a blue bra and a thong that left nothing to the imagination. Clarke wondered what pushed a girl to find work in a place like that, and perhaps because of alcohol in her body, she wondered what it was like to be on a stage with all eyes on her._ _Clarke could not wonder anymore because she felt a cold sensation on her chest and she opened her eyes to see her wet shirt. She looked up and found herself staring at a boy with a guilty expression, who immediately took a step back with his hands up.  
  
_ “ _God, I'm so sorry!” He said upset. “I slipped! I didn't mean to! I'm an idiot!”  
  
_ “ _It's all right.” Clarke reassured him.  
  
__It was not entirely true, especially seeing as it had reduced her white shirt but it was an accident.  
  
__“I'm really sorry.” He continued. “Let me fix it, I'll buy you a drink.”  
  
_ “ _That's not necessary.” A voice broke in.  
  
__She looked back to Lexa and could not read her expression, but for some reason Clarke felt irritated. Lexa had hardly spoken to her since they entered the room and she had sat strictly all the time, avoiding her eyes. What was originally a funny night, it was converted in the game of silence and Clarke was not going to waste more time. She turned to the boy with a smile and nodded.  
  
_ “ _I'd love it.” She said.  
  
__On the boy's face appeared such a large smile, that Clarke suspected that they were about to pop off his ears and he offered his hand to introduce himself.  
  
_ “ _Ramon.” He said.  
  
__Clarke squeezed it energetically. “Clarke, nice to meet you.” Then without another word, she stood up. “I'll come with you.”  
  
__Lexa had observed everything with her jaw clenched and when she saw Clarke ready to follow the boy, her eyes fell on the shirt she was wearing and she took off her jacket, before giving it to Clarke.  
  
_ “ _Put this on you.” Lexa said in a tone a bit more calmly.  
  
__Clarke stared at her for a long moment, almost tempted to refuse because of the rude behavior that Lexa had shown to Ramon, but, when she saw her own shirt, she gave up. There was no need to go to the bar in that condition provoking, perhaps, attention from the customers too drunk to recognize the difference between her and one of the dancers._ _So in spite of herself, she slipped the jacket over her shoulders and fastened it, it was a little bit tight, but nevertheless was able to limit the view to her black bra was visible from the wet cotton.  
  
__Clarke walked by Ramon at the bar, leaning on her elbows and smiling at the bartender.  
  
_ “ _Three beers, one margaritas, two cuba libre.” Ramon said. “And what for this beautiful girl?” He asked, giving her a smile.  
  
_ “ _A mojito.” Clarke replied returning the smile as she watched the bartender prepare all the drinks. “They're all for you?” She asked with a slight nod.  
  
__Ramon chuckled and turned to indicate the table next to the one where Lexa was sitting, her back rigid and her eyes focused on the stage. Clarke shook her head and turned her attention to the group of boys and girls, they were giggling and encouraging Ramon to flirt with her.  
  
_ “ _Excuse me, they're idiots.” Ramon muttered, scratching his head.  
  
__“Nah, I bet they're funny.” Clarke said taking the glass.  
  
__Ramon paid for the drinks and grabbed the tray with the glasses, and thanked the bartender with a nod._ “ _Come, I'll introduce you to them.” He offered with a smile, making his way to the tables.  
  
__Clarke put her drink on the table she shared with Lexa – she looked at her for a second before returning her glaze to the dancer on stage - so Clarke switched her chair, bringing it closer to their table, where Ramon was giving drinks.  
  
_ “ _Guys, this is Clarke.” Ramon introduced her. “Clarke meet, Chloe, Jean, Emanuela, Andrea and Chiara.”  
  
__Clarke gave everyone a gesture of her hand, then she turned slightly towards Lexa but when she saw her stubbornly focused on what was happening on stage, Clarke shrugged and returned her attention to the group.  
  
_ “ _Nice to meet you.” They said almost all together, earning a smile from the girl.  
  
__“It is more than a pleasure.” One blonde girl said, raising an eyebrow and looking at her with interest.  
  
__She earned a slap in the back of her head by Andrea who was sitting beside her. “Manu, be gentle.” she warned. “You do not even know her.”  
  
_ “ _As if that had ever stopped her.” Said the other girl, Chiara.  
  
__“Do it again and I'll break your hand.” She said, rubbing the back of her head. “It was inappropriate, Clarke, but you're still beautiful.” Emanuela continued with a wink.  
  
__Clarke smiled at her and her cheeks were painted in red: it was not unusual that someone would give her compliments, but no one since Lexa, had been so brazen.  
  
_ “ _I did not want to embarrass you.” Emanuela spoke. “What brings you to our table? You're not feel_ _ing_ _hot with that jacket? Ramon has behaved like a gentleman?”  
  
_ “ _For the love of god, breathe!” Chloe laughed, shaking her head. "I'm sorry, she did not take her medication today.” She joked.  
  
_ “ _I spilt my drink on her.” Ramon muttered, still feeling guilty. “And I offered her a drink to apologize, and then I invited her to our table.”  
  
__There was a long moment of silence, all eyes were on the girl who was apparently there with Clarke.  
  
__"What happened to your girlfriend?" Chiara asked curiously.  
  
__How could that girl completely ignore someone like Clarke?_ _Clarke turned to look at Lexa's stoic face, she was still intensely focused on the dancer on the stage, so she turned her chair.  
  
_ “ _Lexa is not my girlfriend.” She said with a shrug. “I don't know why she's had a bad day, Lexa is not usually very nice or sociable.” She winked.  
  
__Chloe's hand went up in the air. "If she's not your girlfriend, do you mind if I hit on her?” She asked, her eyes focused on Lexa's face, wide eyes of those who had just seen the ultimate expression of beauty.  
  
__Chiara giggled. “I'm sorry for you, Chloe but seeing the way she's watching the dancer and her companion.” She add_ _ed_ _look_ _ing_ _at Clarke. “I'm afraid that she prefers blondes. Not that I can blame her.” She finished, raising her glass to Clarke and smiling at her, before taking a sip.  
  
_ “ _For a girl like her I’m willing to make my hair blond, red, rainbow, she just needs to tell me.” Chloe muttered before disappearing behind her beer.  
  
__Jean looked at the three girls, and then shook his head. “You three really are shameless.” He sighed in exasperation.  
  
__Clarke chuckled. “Where are you guys from?” She asked, curious about the mixture of accents that she had caught.  
  
_ “ _Our three perverted are Italian.” Ramon said. “Even if Chloe is now almost ready to take American nationality, Andrea is Scottish, Jean comes from France and I am Spanish.”  
  
__Clarke shifted her gaze across the table. “And you know each other .. How?” she asked seriously intrigued.  
  
_ “ _We're doing a tour of Europe before leaving.” Chiara explain.  
  
_ “ _We're going to move to Canada with Chloe and all three wanted to give a worthy goodbye to the continent.” Emanuela finished for her.  
  
__“We're college students and we're here with the Erasmus program” Andrea told. “We met these three homeless and we welcomed them in our apartment for the period that they stay here in Amsterdam”  
  
_ “ _You have welcomed us for the supplies that we can provide?” Emanuela said pulling out a joint from the breast pocket of her shirt, raised eyebrows with a smirk on her lips.  
  
__  
After twenty minutes at that table, Clarke came to the conclusion that she never had so much fun in her life. She had felt the gaze of Lexa on her back and she had seen her several times moving anxiously in her chair every time the joint ended up on her.  
  
__From trifling talk they were quickly switched to more fun things and found themselves playing at: Never have I ever.  
  
_ “ _Okay, okay! It's my turn.” Jean points out clapping his hands. "Never have I ever run naked in a public place.”  
  
__Clarke chuckled, shaking her head, that was an absurd question, she was pretty sure that no one would do such a thing, then her eyes fell on Emanuela who was taking a long drag.  
  
_ “ _What?!” She asked with her mouth half open.  
  
__Emanuela laughed out loud. “Don't ask, I was drunk.” She explained.  
  
_ “ _And you had lost a bet.” Chiara added with the expression of someone who knew a lot.  
  
__Emanuela rolled her eyes and smacked her lips. “I'm sure the people at this table can live without the details, thank you.” She said. “My turn: Never have I ever had a threesome.” She almost did not wait to finish the sentence before taking a long puff.  
  
__Clarke saw from the corners of her eyes Lexa's head snap at them and she could not stop the small smile on her lips ... maybe she could take a little revenge. She watched Chiara and Chloe follow Emanuela and Clarke leaned her hand to take the joint and she noticed Lexa stiffen imperceptibly: that thing strangely made Clarke smile even more.  
  
__“So you're telling me that the three of you ...” She winked, taking a puff.  
  
“No, no, for god_ _’s_ _sake, no.” Chloe shook her head. “They are like my sisters!”  
  
_ “ _I love all women.” Emanuela said. “But no, it would be too weird.”  
  
__“I agree." Chiara added taking a sip of beer.  
  
_ “ _Anyway.” Chloe laid her eyes on Lexa, the girl moved uncomfortably on the chair. “I would love to do that with you and your not- girlfriend of yours.”  
  
_ “ _We could do in four?” Emanuela interjected, blowing a puff of smoke.  
  
_ “ _I would propose in six.” Chiara added, attracting confused looks from all the whole the group. “The sixth is the dildo.” she explained, before taking a sip of her beer.  
  
_ “ _Fair enough.” Emanuela said, nodding, while all the others burst out laughing.  
  
_ “ _Okay, it's my turn.” Clarke said thoughtfully, when she finally managed to stop laughing. “Never have I eveeeeeeeer ... Done a striptease”  
  
__Ramon stole the joint from Clarke's fingers and took a long puff, while everyone curious glances on him.  
  
_ “ _I was trapped at my friend's bachelorette party.” He told with a shrug.  
  
_ “ _And where was the real stripper?” Jean asked, curious.  
  
__“One of the girls tried to undress him before the show, he tried to run away and he fell down and hit his head.” He explained. “He was taken to the hospital and they were left without entertainment, so ...”  
  
“And while the poor boy was fighting for his life, you let yourself get seduced by a group of women?” Chiara asked, impressed.  
  
  
_ “ _Well, can you blame me?” Ramon asked amused.  
  
_ “ _I'd have done it myself.” Emanuela granted. “So, well done, give me five.” she said, turning around to crush the palm against his. “I'll be honest, I thought of paying for a private show, I'm in Amsterdam and who knows when I'll be back, should I not have taken advantage of it?”  
  
_ “ _It seems that someone is already doing that.” Andrea said with a grin, making a nod toward the table behind them.  
  
__Ramon, Chloe and Clarke turned almost simultaneously. Chloe clapped a hand on the boy's chest, just to have a confirmation of what she was seeing, even if what was happening was quite evident.  
  
_ “ _My God ...” Chloe murmured gulping. “It's the sexiest thing I've ever seen.”  
  
__Clarke felt only the voices of the others nod but she could only see red.  
  
__The insistent gaze of Lexa had attracted the attention of the dancer, who had run off the stage and was now offering Lexa a very good lap dance._

 _  
Clarke could not explain why that thing was bother_ _ing_ _her so much. She was in love with her boyfriend and she took pleasure in teasing Lexa. But for some reason watching the dancer rubbing upon the girl, stroking her hair, dipping her fingers on her suspenders, made Clarke's blood boil in her veins.  
  
__It happened often that Lexa's beauty had attracted many stares and comments but it never bothered Clarke. She had already accepted Chloe's jokes, but that was different.  
  
__Even though she knew that she had no right to be jealous Clarke saw all red._ _Clarke looked at the two with an angry expression and then the dancer leaned toward Lexa's ear, whispering something. Lexa stood for a long moment, then she nodded and smiled. The dancer smiled back and she lifted from her lap, she took Lexa's hand and leading her to a door, before disappearing.  
  
_ “ _Annnnd here she goes ...” Chiara said blowing a cloud of smoke and giving the joint to Ramon.  
  
_ “ _God, I'd give anything to be the dancer.” Chloe whispered, stealing the joint before Ramon could take it to his lips.  
  
_ “ _If you can excuse me.” Clarke snarled, standing up and marching toward the door where the two women were secluded.  
  
_ “ _Well ...” Emanuela sighed drinking from her glass. “Obviously it's really her girlfriend but I wonder if at least one of them is aware of that?.”  
  
_ “ _You're sure you want to be that dancer?” Jean asked Chloe, observing Clarke march through the room with angry steps.  
  
_ “ _It would be a glorious death.” She said, starting to roll a new joint.  
  
__  
  
The moment her back hit the sofa, Lexa asked herself what got into her to make her agree to a private dance. For sure, the alcohol in her system had helped in that decision, but so had Clarke’s behavior._  

  
_She had spent all night with those guys, laughing, drinking and most of all smoking._ _Not once did she ask what was going on with her, and after Anya’s call Lexa surely had a lot to think about. Clarke hasn’t asked for an explanation, she hasn’t shown a bit of interest, and that bothered Lexa more than she cared to admit.  
  
__So she spent the night with the alcohol as her only friend, watching Clarke as she moved to the table next to them to spend the night having fun with the group sitting there. When the girl dancing on the stage had noticed her staring, she came to her, gifting her with her dancing skills, and then offering to move to a private room._    _In a rush of anger, frustration and alcohol, Lexa had accepted the offer, but as she watched the girl move through the private room to the stereo to play some music, she wasn't so sure anymore that it was a good idea.  
  
__She closed her yes leaning against the back of the sofa with a sigh, she rubbed her hands on her trousers and instinctively she loosed her tie a little, craving for air. Hearing the girl’s steps grow near, she got ready to feel her body against hers, but all she felt were her lips near her ear.  
  
__“Be patient, I’ll be back in a moment.” She whispered as she disappeared._  
  
_Lexa kept her eyes closed and stayed silent as her mind started to wonder on one thought and one only: Clarke.  
  
__She’d found her incredibly beautiful and sensual that evening, when she’d knocked at her bedroom door, with that white shirt, her hair tied in a long braid falling on her chest and a black skirt that enlightened her fine hips all too well._  
  
_She just barely heard the girl talk to someone, as she kept thinking about Clarke’s ethereal, almost untouchable figure, her hands itching for the desire of touching that auburn skin. Behind her closed eyelids, she could see again the black fabric of the bra she’d spotted when that Ramon spilled his drink on Clarke and she bit down her lower lip, as a shiver went down her spine.  
  
__Drinking has definitely done no good to her.  
  
__The tune of a sensual song started to fill the room, as Lexa let out a heavy sigh. She didn’t want to be there, not really. She’d almost decided to get up and leave, but the girl’s steps were closing in on her. Soft arms wrapped around her shoulders and Lexa’s head started to spin when she smelled the dancer’s scent: it was the same as Clarke’s._  
  
_It couldn’t be!  
  
What were the odds for the girl to have the exact same scent as the object of her deepest desires?_  
  
_It surely was a trick played by her mind, helped by the great amount of alcohol flowing in her body, there couldn’t be any other explanation._   _Soft lips grazed her ear, as gentle fingers playfully toyed with her suspenders.  
  
“There’s only one rule: you cannot touch me.”  
  
Just a whisper, hoarse for the smoke, Lexa could smell it_ _s_ _sweetish scent as she turned her head, her eyes popping open and wide._  
  
_No matter how drunk she was, not even all the alcohol in the world could ever make the frivolous voice of that dancer sound as Clarke’s hoarse, sensual voice. The room started to spin around her, when she found herself sinking in those blue eyes, swell from alcohol and smoke, Clarke’s lips just inches away from hers.  
  
“Clarke...” She gasped incredulously, but Clarke’s index finger crossed her lips shushing her before she could further speak.  
  
“Have you understood my rule?” She asked, stern.  
  
Lexa swallowed, nodding slowly as she tried to calm down her breath and the frantic beating of her heart. At her nod, Clarke rounded the sofa and stood in front of her.  
  
__**  
Don't need permission**_  
_**Made my decision to test my limits  
  
**__  
Clarke’s hands slipped along the jacket she’d borrowed from her, letting the button loose, as Lexa swallowed._  
  
_**  
'Cause it's my business**_  
_**(God as my witness)**_  
_**Start what I finished**_  
  
_  
When the white shirt was revealed to her eyes, Lexa could see those playful hands grazing the soft fabric, slowly, until they reached for the first button, toying with it before popping it open. The second and third buttons soon followed, before those fingers started to caress th_ e uncovered skin, following the sweet valley between Clarke’s breasts, uncovering the lace of her bra.  
  
_**  
Don't need no hold up**_  
_**Taking control of this kind of moment  
  
  
**__Lexa gasped at her, speechless, as she approached, hips swaying and a playful smirk on her lips._ _Lexa took a deep breath, feeling her body tremble, she had to swallow a moan as Clarke climbed on her lap, giving her a close up look of what she’s been dreaming to touch since they’ve first met that night at the art gallery.  
  
__**  
I'm locked and loaded**_  
_**Completely focused (my mind is open)  
  
**__The reality she was living, was a thousand times better than her wildest dream._

  
_That pale, soft, fragrant skin was right before her eyes, if she’d just leaned forward, she could’ve even tasted it… Clarke’s words resonated in her head, clear and forbidding:_ _ **“There’s only one rule: you cannot touch me.”  
  
**__She gasped as Clarke’s hand kept stroking her own chest, her fingers slipping down to find the buttons left closed, toying with them before popping them open, slowly, exasperatingly so, those blue eyes buried in hers.  
  
  
__**All that you got, skin to skin, oh my God**_  
_**Don't ya stop, boy...  
  
  
**__“Oh my God…” Lexa breathed, incapable of stopping her words as that gorgeous sight revealed itself to her.  
  
She clenched her fists, trying to calm the desperate craving of her fingers and hands. Clarke’s scent, mixed with the sweetish one of the smoke she’d consumed was making her dizzy. A cloud of that intoxicating mix wrapped around her, when Clarke untied her braid, letting soft waves of blonde hair fall on her shoulders and onto the pale skin of her chest._    _Lexa felt some of those waves tickle her face, as Clarke’s forehead laid against hers.  
  
__**  
Somethin' 'bout you makes me feel like a dangerous woman**_    
  
  
_Clarke’s fingers slipped trough Lexa’s hair, pulling to make her lift her head, their gazes finally meeting as she pressed their foreheads together, their breaths mixing._  
  
  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you**_    
_**Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't**_    
  
  
_Clarke’s lips were so close that Lexa could feel their warmth against hers. Just a few inches and she could have a taste._  
  
_**  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout...**_    
  
_  
A little slap on her right hand tore her away from the spell Clarke had wrapped around her, only then she noticed that the tip of her fingers were grazing Clarke’s knee.  
  
__“As I recall, I said that you cannot touch me.” Clarke muttered, hoarse._  
  
_**  
Nothing to prove and I'm bulletproof and**_  
_**Know what I'm doing**_    
  
  
_Clarke’s fingers ran along her loose tie, untying it in a fluid movement as she pulled it loose from her shirt. She forced her wrist behind her back as Lexa frowned, staring at her in a mix of lust and curiosity. Her heart skipped a beat when Clarke leaned on her, pressing their breasts together, as she fumbled with her tie, binding it tightly around her wrists.  
  
Lexa was lost.  
  
She was completely in Clarke’s grasp, tied up, helpless and filled with desire as she was, Clarke could have done whatever she wanted with her. Being honest, Lexa was completely fine with that.  
  
__**  
The way we're movin' like introducing**_  
_**Us to a new thing**_  
_**I wanna savor, save it for later  
  
**__  
Clarke discarded her shirt, dropping it to the ground and smiled, seeing Lexa sigh at the view she allowed. She moved her hands on her thighs, stroking the fabrics of her skirt and pulling it along to her hips, showing a little of what was hidden underneath._    _Lexa gasped at her, her breath chocked in her throat, as her heart started a furious race when Clarke leaned against her._  
  
_“_ _ **The taste of flavor, cause I'm a taker, Cause I'm a giver, it's only nature. I live for danger**_ _” She singed hoarsely, her lips moving against Lexa’s ear, as her fingers looked for the buttons of her shirt. “_ _ **All that you got, skin to skin, oh my God, Don't ya stop, girl!**_ _”  
  
__She backed away a little, staring straight in her eyes to show her all the power she had over her right now._  
  
_“_ _ **Somethin' 'bout you...**_ _” She kept singing her voice raspy.  
  
Clarke’s index finger dipped between the open hem of Lexa's shirt, starting to slowly move downwards on her skin. Lexa was sure, she could perfectly feel the frantic beating of her heart under the tip of that finger, as it kept sliding further south.  
  
  
“_ _ **Makes me feel like a dangerous woman...”**_  
  
_  
She felt that gentle caress stopping as it reached the fabric of her bra, only to start again, following it_ _s_ _profile. Lexa was hypnotized, drowned in sensation, dazed at the thought that she was actually living the moment.  
  
__**  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you**_    
_**Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout...**_    
  
_  
Clarke’s finger went back on it_ _s_ _path over her skin, then her soft hands gripped her shoulders, pushing herself away from her lap, brushing her face with the ivory expanse of the fragrant skin of her chest._    _Lexa’s body complained for the sudden lack of contact, forcing a muffled, disappointed moan to escape her throat, but Clarke was all but finished with her._  
  
_**  
All girls wanna be like that**_    
_**Bad girls underneath, like that**_    
  
_  
Clarke’s foot tapped against her ankle, in a sweet suggestion to part her legs. Lexa quickly obliged, and was rewarded by the heavenly sight of Clarke’s hands lifting a little more the skirt around her hips._ _She gasped for air when she spotted the ivory skin of her thighs wrapped in a black garter. Lexa was sure her heart was about to stop, but she wouldn’t mind dying that way.  
  
__**  
You know how I'm feeling inside**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout**_  
_**All girls wanna be like that**_  
_**Bad girls underneath, like that**_  
_**You know how I'm feeling inside**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout**_  
  
_  
Clarke sat between her legs, back pressed against her chest and Lexa’s eyes shut at the feeling of her skin barely grazing hers through the open hem of her shirt._    _She felt her push further back, creating the perfect friction between her thighs, and Lexa had to bite her lips to stop a moan. She was ready to collapse, her brain was leaving her and her body was craving for touch, craving for relief._  
  
_**  
Somethin' 'bout you makes me feel like a dangerous woman**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you**_  
_**Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you**_  
  
_  
But most of all she wanted to be able to touch Clarke._ _To stroke those soft legs, gripping the fabric of the garter, let her head down on her chest and get lost in the sweet valley of her breast… Clarke was still moving, pushing against her, blond curls tickled her face, and Lexa, lost in desire, leaned forward, pressing her forehead on Clarke’s shoulder blade, shutting her eyes._  
  
****

_**All girls wanna be like that  
**__**Bad girls underneath like that**_  
_**You know how I'm feeling inside**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout  
  
**__  
“Please…” she whispered, inhaling the sweet scent of her hair._  
  
_Clarke slowly turned her head over her shoulder, she swallowed seeing Lexa’s face buried in her hair. She moved a little away, freeing her to stare at her eyes, and, unable to stop, she raised the bet._  
  
_“Please what?” She asked in a whisper._  
  
_Lexa took a shaking breath, gazing at her eyes. “Please, Clarke.” She asked again, as if that was the only explanation she was able to give.  
  
And to be fair, Lexa really didn’t know what she was begging for._  
  
_**  
All girls wanna be like that**_  
_**Bad girls underneath like that**_  
_**You know how I'm feeling inside**_  
_**Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout**_    
  


_Lost in those blue eyes, she saw Clarke’s hand slowly lift and felt her fingers entangle in her hair, forcing her face closer to Clarke’s shoulder, until her lips were just inches away from that pale skin. Her eyes searched those blue irises, looking for permission to move. Clarke seemed to be as uncertain as she was, but there was no hesitation in the way she pushed the strap of her bra away from her shoulder.  
  
“Do it…” She whispered, her voice still._  
  
_**  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
  
_  
Lexa felt her hot breath on her lips, and for a moment she was tempted to lean forward to kiss Clarke’s lips, but she knew it would have been too much. Keeping staring in_ _to_ _those blue eyes, Lexa pressed her lips on the hot skin of her shoulder, brushing it with delicate movement to feel it_ _s_ _softness and breathe it_ _s_ _scent._  
  
_Clarke’s eyes fell closed and Lexa could feel her shiver against her._  
  
_When she finally laid that so desired kiss on her skin, Clarke allowed it only for a brief moment, before her fingers gripped at Lexa’s hair, pulling her away, as she quickly got up._    _Lexa watched her collect her shirt and jacket from the floor, throwing them over her shoulders. Then she was gone, leaving Lexa in the depth of the frustrated desire she’d mercilessly thrown her into._  
  
_**  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy**_  
_**(Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you...)**_  
  
_  
Lexa stared at the door as the song finished and the tunes floated around the room, leaving her in an hollow silence._  
  
  


****  
  
  
If her stomach hadn't required food so strongly, Clarke would die quietly in bed for the rest of the day, especially after what she had just come to her mind. Now she understood the satisfied smile on the Lexa's lips and the way she had teased her, that she had almost given her the strength to give up breakfast, when her body had practically screamed for food.

 _  
_ So she grabbed the first thing she'd found - the shirt that Lexa was wearing the night before - and walked in the living room, surprised to find Adam sitting at the table, eating what at first glance looked like sausages. Clarke had to admit, she was glad that Adam was there, this would allow her to eat breakfast without embarrassing questions and then she could sneak into her room again and die.  
  
She had no intention of going away from Amsterdam, she was not sure that her body would be able to bear the trip and if Lexa was not willing to redecorate the interior of her jet, she would have done well to agree to her request.  
  
Clarke sat quietly and even though her stomach seemed willing, the idea of eating something was making her feel sick but she knew of having to strain. She saw Lexa give her a glass of water and a pill.  
  
“Eat something light, Miss Griffin.” Adam said. “And drink plenty of water.” He continued. “And absolutely no coffee, at least not for the moment.”  
  
“No coffee?!” Clarke said with a groan.  
  
“If you prefer to not feel bad, it would be advisable to avoid it.” He smiled.  
  
Lexa finished buttering a slice of bread and leaned to take a piece of salmon, putting it on her plate.  
  
“This is your idea of light?” Clarke asked, a bit annoyed.  
  
Adam chuckled. “Miss Woods is right.” he said. “You must remove the vitamin B in your body, salmon is great and full of fatty acids.”  
  
Clarke looked at him with a frown. “And you know all this because ...?”  
  
“Because after my father's death, Adam often found me in my bathroom after a night of craziness.” Lexa explained taking a sip of coffee. “And to prevent my uncle finding out and going crazy, Adam was always trying to limit the damage to the best of his ability.”  
  
“I assure you that the salmon will do its job, Miss Griffin.” He assured her. “Take the medicine and when you are feeling better, if you still want, you can drink all the coffee in the world.”  
  
Clarke did not comment further: Once again, she was sure that behind Lexa's facade there was more. Lexa had a level of grief that Clarke was not sure had healed completely. Clarke began to eat her salmon, trying to be strong, controlling to the best of her ability the way her insides were rebelling, observing with the corner of her eyes, how Lexa was eating. They stayed in that comfortable silence for a long time, just enjoying each other's company while Lexa read some emails on her phone.  
  
“I have to prepare the car, Miss Woods?” Adam asked.   
  
Lexa turned to stare Clarke and a small amused smile curled the lips. “We'll give Clarke some time to make herself presentable and-”  
  
“I have no intention of moving from this hotel.” Clarke made it clear and didn't let her finish. “Unless you do not want to redecorate your jet with what I have just put in my stomach.”  
  
Adam let out a laugh and stood up, shaking his head. “We just wanted to be sure that this was your line of thought.” He said. “I told the Miss Alexandria _how_ you came back this morning and I was almost sure that you would not be able to move from bed.”  
  
Clarke frowned. “Which state? What are you tal-”  
  
Suddenly she remembered how her and Adam had stumbled across the room and how, although she knew that she should not go through the door that separated her room from Lexa's, she had still done, not before removing all of the clothes. Clarke remembered that she spent the rest of the night in the apartment of the group she had met in the bar, continued drink, smoke and have fun, as long as a little accident with the fire had made unusable her skirt and blouse. So, Chloe gave to her a pair of her shorts and she found herself walking through Amsterdam wearing only those and Lexa's jacket. Clarke thanked heaven that Adam had stayed with her, otherwise she would not be able to return to the hotel alone.  
  
“You do not remember?”  
  
Clarke shook her head. “I do not remember anything.” But her tone left to understand something else.  
  
Lexa smiled from behind her mug and after crossing Adam's gaze, who was well aware of the lie had just come out from Clarke's lips, she could not resist. “ _ **Something about you.”**_ Lexa hummed quietly with an husky voice. _**“Makes me feel like a dangerous woman ...”  
  
**_ Clarke, who had just brought her glass to her lips began to cough loudly, wetting her chest and legs. Lexa and Adam shared an amused look and they waited for the girl's face to go back to a normal colour.  
  
“I'll go take a shower.” Clarke finally rasped, when she managed to stop the tremors of her body.  
  
Lexa smiled and watched her march toward her room, her shirt lifting up at every step showing everything she got a glimpse the night before. If she concentrated she could still feel the sensation of Clarke's body against her, her perfume, the softness of her skin ...  
  
“I'll go to the front desk to confirm our stay for today.” Adam's voice stopped the train of her thoughts.  
  
“Yes, Adam, thank you.” She said. “And take the day off, I do not think Clarke will have the strength to go out today.”  
  
Adam tilted his head with a slight smile. “And I'm sure you don't mind much.” He argued, amused.  
  
Then without another word, he walked to the door with a fast pace, leaving her alone at the breakfast table. Lexa clearly heard the sound of the shower and she bit her bottom lip, closing her eyes, trying to banish from his mind the images that the sound was bringing to the surface.  
  
Adam was absolutely right, she was not sorry about spending the day with Clarke Griffin in the hotel room.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- The song used is dangerous woman by Ariana Grande
> 
> \- I would just mention that alcohol and smoking make human defenses very low. Lexa has not done anything more than what Clarke asked. Clarke has taken a revenge for all the past six years waiting and desiring Lexa but not being able to have her for many reasons. So show Lexa, unconsciously, under the influence of the alchool what it means to want something so much, but you can not have.  
> And yes, I will not lie alcohol and smoking have helped her in this.


	8. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fourth stop of their week

**Capitolo 7**

 

Clarke closed her eyes, as the sun coming in from the window caressed her, the heat radiating along her body. She tried to concentrate on her breath instead of the images her brain, finally awake, seemed so determined to show her again and again.  
  
It was hard. With a little concentration, she could still feel Lexa’s body pressed against her, the way those green eyes had devotedly looked at her, the tremble in Lexa’s body and her whispered plea…  
  
“For heaven’s sake, stop it…” she grumbled, rolling herself between the covers and hiding her head under the pillow.  
  
She’d told Finn not to worry, that everything was under control, but just some alcohol and a little smoke had been enough to lose that control she’d claimed to have. Truth be told, the last few days had been pretty intense, and Clarke had found herself facing emotions she couldn't make sense of, that left her spent and confused.

Her stomach grumbled, pushing her to peek at the alarm clock on the bedside table from under the pillow, she moaned seeing how long has passed since lunchtime. Considering what she had for breakfast after her wild night, she would be surprised if her body wouldn't have started to loudly ask for fuel. She had almost given in and was ready to call the room service, when a quiet knock on the door got her attention. Emerging from her hiding, she grumbled something like an answer and wasn't surprised to see Lexa getting in, a tray in her hands.   
  
“I don’t mean to disturb you, but I’m heading out and I thought you may want to eat something.” She started, with a nod to the food Clarke could see on the tray. “And if you need anything else, you can just call the room service.”  
  
Clarke sat up “Where are you going?” She asked before she could stop herself.  
  
She didn’t want to show interest in Lexa’s schedule, but she’d found herself frowning at what the woman was wearing: a swimsuit.   
  
“There’s a wonderful thermal facility in this hotel, and since you’re clearly not in shape for a tour of the city, I thought I could go have a look at that.”  
  
Clarke bit her lower lip, quickly checking her options: indeed she wasn't feeling like going in a tour of the city, or get back on a plane, but she would have really liked to join her in a visit to the thermal facility. Before she had the chance to express her thought, Lexa lifted an eyebrow at her, her head bent on her shoulder as she let out a low chuckle.  
  
“Why don’t you get changed and put something in your stomach?” She started, amused, as she advanced a few steps in the room. “You’ll find me downstairs, in a jacuzzi that I’ll be more than glad to share with you.”  
  
“Well, if you insist, who am I to say no?” Clarke smirked, slipping out of bed. “Did you have something to eat?” She asked, opening her suitcase to look for her swimsuit, turning to her, when Lexa failed to answer. “You’re not going there with an empty stomach.” She admonished.   
  
Lexa’s mouth fell open to answer, but a very intimidating Clarke stepped to her, pointing a finger on her chest as she pushed her back in their shared living room, glaring to her to sit, she wasted no time to oblige.  
  
“Get two table places ready, Woods, I’ll be back in a minute.” She ordered, closing the door.  
  
Just as promised, Clarke was back in no time, emerging from her room in nothing but a swimsuit, after what had happened the night before, Lexa couldn't help but stare at that pale skin more than she should have, if only for a moment. When the memory of the night before got too vivid, she carefully looked away, staring at her plate instead, as her lips started to tingle at the memory of that skin under them.   
  
She swallowed and took a sip of orange juice, shutting her eyes, only to get lost in Clarke’s blue stare, when she opened them back. They gazed at each other for a long moment and when she saw her bit on her lower lip, Lexa had to call at every scrap of self-control she had not to talk about the thing that was feeding their mutual uneasiness.  
  
“Bread?” Lexa whispered, handing it over to her, never breaking their eye contact.  
  
Clarke gave her a slow nod, and she couldn’t control a shiver as their fingers touched. She finally looked away, pouring some orange juice in her glass, trying to think about something else; luckily, Lexa’s phone chimed, breaking the uneasy silence.  
  
“Pardon me.” She excused herself, quickly getting up to answer.   
  
Clarke let go the breath she was holding, pressing her hands to her face in the attempt to calm herself. It wasn’t possible that the simple brushing of their fingers could make her heart race like that, but her heartbeat got frantic as soon as their skins touched.  
  
Maybe she hasn't got the most brilliant idea when she’d decided to spend the rest of the day with Lexa, in an hot tub.   
  
  
  
When Lexa dip herself in the hot water, right next to her, letting out an hoarse approving moan, and causing an hurricane under her belly button, Clarke knew she was right. She took a deep, silent breath as her gaze followed the last person that was getting out, leaving them completely alone in the room.  
  
“Are you alright?” Lexa asked, getting herself comfortable on the other side of the hot tub.  
  
It seemed as if she was trying to put more space as possible between the two of them, and Clarke was extremely grateful for that. It was becoming really hard for her to think with Lexa's presence so near, as if having her that close was constantly chocking her ability to use her brain.   
  
Clarke nodded, not trusting her voice to answer, and she closed her eyes, letting the warm water lull her wary body. Lexa didn’t speak any further, determined to let her rest, but Clarke could fell her gaze on her, and she had to force herself to ignore it.  It wasn't that simple: Lexa’s eyes seemed to burn on her skin, just like the night before, and just the memory of the moment they’ve shared twisted her stomach in pleasure.   
  
They got so close…  
  
She’d almost gave in, she’d almost allowed Lexa to kiss her. She’d _desired_ for Lexa to kiss her, she admitted, she had hoped her to disobey and to brush her lips on hers, instead of doing so with her shoulder. Opposite to all she’d always thought of her, and even though she’d tied her hands to prevent Lexa to touch her, she knew Lexa wouldn't have. She’d done it more to stop her own instincts, cause it was Clarke who’d almost loose control over the game she’d started.   
  
“Are you still nauseous? What about your head ache?”   
  
Lexa’s voice sounded as a caress and Clarke forced her eyes open, staring intently at her, at her wet hair, the water dripping on her long, exposed neck, her lips curled in a smile.    
  
She was gorgeous.  
  
Clarke blinked, trying to regain control, it was like that dance had uncovered the Pandora’s box she’d desperately tried to keep closed until then.  
  
“Adam’s advices had been useful.” She finally answered. “Even though I would give anything for some coffee, this hot water isn’t helping my body to stay awake.”   
  
“That’s what places like this are for, to relax and let stress float away in the water.”  
  
“I’m sure that falling asleep and drown in the process in one of the hot tub of the hotel is not what the director wished when he decided to open the thermal facility.”   
  
Lexa laughed and Clarke’s eyebrow lifted on it’s own accord, it probably was the best sound she’d ever heard, and she was sure she’d never seen Lexa so at ease before.  
  
“I would never let you drown, don't worry about that.” She assured “You’re almost as theatrical and dramatic as my lawyer.”  
  
Clarke frowned, trying to figure Anya, the stoic, straight-faced lawyer, as a theatrical and dramatic person. “Your lawyer? For what I saw she doesn’t seem theatrical and dramatic at all.” She scoffed.  
  
Lexa smiled, shaking her head. “Let’s say that Anya is very good at disguising that side of herself.” She explained. “She’d only started to act on it after she’d met her wife.”  
  
Clarke has no problem to believe it, she’d been a witness of one of their little scenes on Lexa’s balcony.  
  
“Now, I’m not sure who had the idea first, even though knowing them they probably plotted it together.” Lexa went on. “I only know that I started to find multicolored post-it, saying _we’ve been there_ and signed by both of them in every single place they’ve… baptized.”  
  
“Baptized?” Clarke asked confused.   
  
She gaped incredulous at that revelation, when she saw Lexa’s amused gaze.  
  
“And the funny thing, well, funny for them, is that every single place belonged to me.” She went on, her eyes smiling. “The desk in my office, my bed, my shower, it seems that the night of the party I was too distracted, since I’ve found one in my wardrob-”  
  
“They actually did it!” Clarke exclaimed, bewildered.  
  
“I beg your pardon?” Lexa asked confused.  
  
“The night of the party, Anya seemed to be crossed at you, she joined her wife and proposed her to get her revenge in your shower.” Clarke explained. “Raven pointed that they’ve already been in your shower and she proposed your wardrobe, since, and I’m quoting: she really wanted to wrinkle your expensive clothes.”   
  
“I can’t believe them.” Lexa finally stated. “Once I got into my office only to find a whole, big post-it heart sticker to the window behind my desk.” Lexa shook her head, incredulous. “I still haven't figure out the one I found _inside_ the fridge.”  
  
“The fri- the _fridge_?!” Clarke asked bewildered. “How the hell they’ve managed…”  
  
“I have no idea.” Lexa answered. “And to be honest, I’m not sure I would like to know. I’ve just thrown all it’s content away, you know, just to be sure.”  
  
“My God…” Clarke muttered amused and bewildered.  
  
She only knew Anya for the professional relationship they were forced to maintain, but she would have never guessed something like that. She’d only seen her perfectly ironed suits, her hard gaze and her royal bearing. She was impressed at how much she could change in Raven’s presence, but she also knew that love could often bare a person’s most secret sides.   
  
“Haven’t you ever protested?”   
  
“Of course I did, but stopping Anya is not one of my skills, so I deal with it through my patience and efficient cleaning company.” Lexa smirked.  
  
Clarke gave her a little smile and closed her eyes back, letting the hot, bubbling water lull her, she was sure Lexa would not let her fall asleep. She heard the door open slowly, and, hearing someone talking to Lexa in a low voice, Clarke forced her eyes open again, Adam was at the door.  
  
“Excuse me again, Clarke.” Lexa said, getting out of the hot tub, Clarke had a glimpse of something she couldn’t identify on her back. “This project is giving Anya some trouble and it needs my constant supervision.” She explained, wearing the bathrobe.   
  
She followed her as she went pass Adam, taking the phone he was offering her, not even giving Clarke the time to answer.   
  
“I hope it’s nothing too serious.” Clarke muttered. “If she needs to go back-”  
  
Adam shook his head, stopping her. “Everything's under control, miss Griffin.” He assured. “Anya is just keeping her informed of every passage of this project, miss Woods has been working on it for years.” He went on. “There’s nothing to be concerned about, it should be completed in a few days, and miss Woods wants to be sure that everything will be perfect.”  
  
Clarke bit her lower lip, as she was eaten up by curiosity: every time the lawyer phoned her, Lexa became as tense as a violin chord, as if a misstep would destroy her whole empire. She knew it couldn't be that, Lexa's company was too strong to risk failure, and that, obviously, was just firing up her curiosity.  
  
“I think I’ll anticipate my massage.” She finally said, getting up, careful not to slip on the wet floor.  
  
Adam didn't answer, he just moved to the side, letting her through and watching her leaving, a small smile on his lips. That girl was a constant surprise and he was really hoping she would let Lexa in her heart, he really thought they were made for each other.  
  
Lexa was back ten minutes later, she found Adam sitting on a couch, a book on his lap, and she joined him, giving him the phone back. The man looked at her, putting the phone back in the inside pocket of his jacket as he got up, ready to go back to the pool to enjoy the sunny day.   
  
“Everything okay?” He asked.   
  
She gave him a slow nod. “There were a few problems, but Anya has sorted all out, she’ll call back me as soon as it is ready.” She explained.  
  
“You don’t look as happy as you should be.” He pointed out. “You’ve been working on it for six years now, you’re almost there-”  
  
“I know, that’s the problem.” She breathed.  
  
Adam decided not to push further, he knew all too well what was vexing her, but he also knew Lexa wouldn't talk about it and there was no point in pushing her.   
  
“Miss Griffin decided to anticipate her massage.” He said, showing her a door.  
  
Lexa smiled to him, lovingly squeezing his shoulder. “Thank you, Adam. I don’t think Anya will call me back before a few hours.” She assured. “Are you gonna join Clarke and me for dinner? I would really appreciate it.”   
  
“I’d love to.” He said with a smile.   
  
Lexa’s eyes followed him as he left the room until he was gone, after giving her a little bow, only then she let out a long breath, trying to regain control. Maybe a massage wasn’t a bad idea at all. She considered her options and then she went to the door, giving it a light knock, pushing it when a voice, definitely not Clarke’s, answered.   
  
She found herself unconsciously licking her lips as her eyes followed the soft line of Clarke’s back, stopping at her hips, where a towel let her have just a little glimpse of her gorgeous lower back, of which she had a taste the night before. She cleared her throat seeing the blonde girl working on Clarke stared at her, clearly wanting to know the reason of her presence and Lexa smiled, trying to focus.  
  
“Sorry, I’m late, I’ve booked a massage.” She finally said, stepping through the room.  
  
The girl gave her a nod, pointing the separé and Lexa went to it keeping her gaze away from Clarke. She joined them back a few minutes later, finding a third girl waiting for her with a smile.  
  
“I’m Katerina.” She said with a strong eastern accent. “I’ll take care of you.”   
  
Lexa hold back one of her usual pun. If she’d been alone, she would probably have flashed her charming smile to the girl, and said something alluring, but she decided to just give the girl a smile as she approached the massage bed she was showing her. Taking off her towel and letting it hang around her hips, she laid prone on the bed, peeking at Clarke’s closed eyes as the girl enjoyed her masseuse’s attentions. Katerina started to rub on her back, adding perfumed oil that tickled her nostrils, helping her to relax, she sighed, letting herself doze off, when suddenly a sound rang clear in her ears.   
  
“Mmh, Helga.” Clarke moaned, hoarsely. “Your hands are gold…”   
  
Lexa’s eyes popped open to see Helga massage Clarke's back to her bliss, eliciting a series of sexy and extremely appealing moans from her.  
  
“Mmmmm, it feels _so good._ ” Clarke moaned, in appreciation of Helga’s skilled hands. “Lower Helga, _please._ ”   
  
Lexa swallowed, blinking her eyes as the masseuse’s hands trailed down Clarke’s back curve, she couldn’t stop her eyes to find the side of her naked breast, following the way it moved at the rhythm of her breath.  
  
 _It was… hypnotic.  
  
_ “Mmmm, Helga.” Clarke hissed. “Feels _so_ good.”  
  
“Oh my God...” Lexa breathed.  
  
“Did I hurt you?” Katerina immediately asked, lifting her hands from her skin.   
  
Lexa shook her head, finally moving her eyes away from the girl beside her, clearing her throat as she tried to regain control. Those moans, mixed with memories of the night before, were giving her a very hard time.  
  
“No, Katerina, it’s okay, carry on.” She finally said with the steadiest voice she could conjure.  
  
When she watched back at the bed beside hers, she found herself sinking into two blue pools, sparkling with a mischievous light. She bit her bottom lip seeing Clarke lifting an eyebrow and moaning again when Helga pressed a good spot on her back.   
  
“It looks like you’re enjoining your massage.” Lexa murmured.   
  
“Mmhm, a lot...” she answered breathlessly. “Aren’t you?”  
  
Lexa licked her lips, staring deeply in her eyes as she nodded, closing back her eyes and letting go a long moan.

  
  
****  
  
  
“I’m sure she was a sight!” Clarke exclaimed, amused, she took a sip of her wine looking at the woman in front of her as her eyes rotated in frustration.   
  
The simple dinner the three of them were sharing in the hotel’s garden, was suddenly transformed in a coalition against Lexa. Adam, who’s been a part of her family since she was a toddler, knew too many anecdotes about her, that Clarke was enjoining far too much for her liking.  
  
“Oh, miss Woods has been a breath of fresh air.” Adam went on. “She was so cute, running back and forth in the hallways with those braids and her little dresses.”   
  
“Wait… you used to wear dresses?” Clarke asked with wide eyes.  
  
Lexa’s eyes rolled. “Just because my mother loved them.” She dismissed, playing with the fork in her hand. “After she died… my dad wasn't of the same opinion, and it seems that suits looks better on me than dresses and skirts.” She said sipping her wine.  
  
“I beg to differ.” Adam interceded. “I’ve always thought you looked pretty in a skirt, miss Woods.”  
  
She smiled sadly at him, shaking her head. “I know Adam, you’ve often tried to give me fashion advices.”  
  
“Advices that she’d never followed.” Adam added, talking to Clarke. “But miss Woods only listened to only one person.”  
  
Clarke bend her head to the side, and even if she knew she shouldn't, she couldn't keep her mouth shut. “How was your mother like?” She asked curious.  
  
Lexa tensed for a moment and when their eyes met, Clarke could see all the pain that memory still bring to her.   
  
“Sorry, I shouldn't hav-”  
  
“My mother was a clever woman, educated and kind.” Lexa stopped her. “She was a musician, she could play all kind of instruments, but her favorite was the piano.” She went on, her gaze fixed on her glass. “We spent our afternoons in the great room my father built for her, playing, reading, talking.”   
  
“So you can play?”  
  
“Different instruments.” Lexa nodded. “But, like my mother I prefer the piano, and she was a very talented, very patient teacher.”   
  
“Miss Woods and Costia were her favorite pupils.” Adam intervene without thinking.  
  
When he realized what he said, his mouth fall agape and he tried to add something, but Lexa’s had lift, imposing silence as she gulped down her wine in one long sip.   
  
“Lexa...”  
  
Clarke jumped, it was the first time, since she’d seen them together, that she’s heard Adam call her by her name. A long, tense and uncomfortable silence fell, Clarke felt like she was in the middle of something bigger.   
  
She cleared her throat. “Would you like to dance, Adam?” She asked in a weak attempt to lift the tension.  
  
“I am not a great dancer.” Adam said with a rueful smile. “Why don’t you dance with miss Woods? In addition to music lessons, her mother made sure she was able to put her feet on the ground without stumbling.”  
  
Lexa looked at him for a long moment, her jaw tense and her fingers on the glass so tightly that her knuckles turned white, then Clarke bit her lower lip and looked down at her plate. After what had happened the night before, dancing with Lexa was something she was not ready to repeat. Lexa surprised her, just like always and her voice came as a small breeze to caress her.  
  
“Would you offer me this dance?” she asked gently.  
  
“Lexa you don't-”  
  
Lexa interrupted her, she put the glass on the table and held out her hand. Clarke stared at her for a long time undecided about what to do and she finally accepted. They made their way among the small crowd of people, in the middle of where it had been improvised a small track, just as a sweet melody on the piano came to life. Lexa instinctively put her hands on her waist and Clarke tied her arms around Lexa's neck, it did not take long to start to move in complete silence.  
  
“It was not necessary.” Clarke finally muttered. “I proposed to Adam to dance because that situation seemed a little bit... tense?” she asked rhetorically"  
  
“Do you think?” Lexa said with a small smile. “Adam is the only family I have right now. We are so used to be just me and him, that we often forget that there are things that should remain between us."  
  
“Yeah,sure, I understand perfectly.”  
  
They did not add anything else, Lexa made her moves with a sweet smile on her face, showing her how to move her feet under the impressed look of Clarke, in a single night she was learning many things about her wife.  
  
“He was not joking in saying that you know to dance.” Clarke laughed. “This intrigues me even more about your musical gifts.”  
  
“They would surprise you.” Lexa said amused making her perform a swing before retighten to her chest. “But they would reveal too much of my talents that you could not handle it.” she continued.   
  
“You're so modest, Miss Woods.” Clarke chuckled. “You do not think you are a little bit too sure of yourself?”  
  
“I'm only saying the truth, Miss Griffin.” She responded. “I'll give you-” Lexa stopped in mid-sentence when she saw Adam reaching them, holding her phone.  
  
“Anya.” He simply said.  
  
Lexa nodded. “Excuse me, Clarke.” she said, taking a step back. “But I have to leave you with Adam, I hope you will forgive me.” she smiled slightly. “I'll be back as soon as possible.”  
  
Adam gave her the phone and he did not think twice to take her place and hold Clarke. Clarke looked at the girl going away until she's disappeared inside the hotel and once again Clarke wondered what was going on.  
  
That day had been rather strange, Lexa had been talking on the phone with Anya all the time and even Adam had seemed tense. The curiosity was killing Clarke but she decided to keep it to herself.  
  
“Do not worry, Miss Griffin.”Adam said after a long moment, slowly swaying. “You will not need to ask her anything, you will know very soon.” he whispered.  
  
Clarke frowned and stared at him confused but she found his small smile, so she finally rested her head on his shoulder. She did not know why but the man gave her the confidence that nobody but her father was always able to give her and despite the particular situation she thanked him silently.  
  
But Lexa did not come back like she had promised.  
  
  
  
****  
  
  
Clarke leaned against the balustrade and watched the stars, unable to stop the thoughts that crowded her mind. She had tried to expel for the rest of the evening the concern for Lexa, the way she was tense when she heard the name Costia and all the calls. When Lexa had not returned, she realized it was time to go back to the room. She had allowed Adam to take her and she took the opportunity to call Finn and Octavia and then she enjoyed a long bath in the big tub in her bathroom.  
  
She had waited for Lexa but the girl had not come back, so Clarke had knocked on her door but she was not lucky, at that moment she realized that there was definitely something wrong.  
  
A light breeze caressed Clarke's face and she sighed with relief, wondering which programs had Lexa in mind for the next days. It was then that she saw the girl in the garden in the same place where they eaten dinner, sitting at the bar, her head bowed and glass between her fingers. Clarke bit her bottom lip, tried to remind herself that she should not care about what ailed Lexa, that those problems were not something that affect her but seeing Lexa in that state made her sick.  
  
Clarke watched Lexa finish her drink, before getting up and talk to the bartender, the girl smiled to her, indicating a point that Clarke could not see from her position. Lexa put a few dollars on the counter and the bartender blushed and shook her head but Lexa did not say anything else, she just walked away from the counter and Clarke did not see her anymore.

  
Clarke appraised her options for a few seconds and shook her head decided to let Lexa alone in her own privacy, so she stepped away from the railing, ready to go inside her room when a melody stopped her. She could not explain how she knew it, but she knew it was Lexa. She walked into the bedroom, where she took off her football shirt that usually used as pajamas and she wore a pair of shorts and a t-shirt.  
  
Clarke did not find anyone on the road, a sign that most of the hotel guests were in bed or maybe around the streets of Amsterdam and Clarke was thankful for that. The clothes she was wearing would have attracted many stares, especially at that time of night and in a city like that. She reached the restaurant and crossed the room, noticing that the waiters were setting up the tables and dishes for the next day, so, she reached the door to the garden and she heard again a delicate melody. When Clarke crossed the threshold, she stopped for a moment and gasped.  
  
Lexa was sitting at the piano, the shirtsleeves rolled up on her elbows, her eyes closed and her fingers caressed the whites and blacks keys of the piano and then Clarke heard Lexa's voice.  
  


" **I took a pill in Ibiza, to show Avicii I was cool and when I finally got sober, felt 10 years older, but fuck it, it was something to do."**    
  


Clarke recognized the song and was surprised how Lexa had managed to transform rhythm into something calm and relaxing. Clarke looked at her enchanted by the movement of her hands and her voice.   
  


" _ **I'm living out i L.A, I drive a sports car just to prove I'm a real big baller cause I made a million dollars, and I spend it on girls and shoes**_."  
  
  
A sad smile appeared on her lips at that verse, because they were perfect to describe Lexa.  
  
  
" **But you don't wanna be high like me, never really knowing why like me, you don't ever wanna step off that roller coaster and be all alone**."

  
Clarke watched her face: eyes closed, her body tense and the rigidity of her shoulders. She scowled and made her way through the empty tables to reach her.

  
" **You don't wanna ride the bus like this, never knowing who to trust like this, you don't wanna be stuck up on that stage singing, stuck up on that stage singing..."  
  
**  
When she approached the piano, she saw Lexa take a deep breath and her fingers were moving with more confidence.

  
" **All I know are sad songs, sad songs... darling, all I know are sad songs, sad songs**."  
  
  
Clarke felt a knot in her throat at the way Lexa's voice broke on those verses and she wondered what had brought her to sing a song so sad.  
  
  
" **I'm just a singer who already blew his shot, I get along with old timers cause my name's a reminder of a pop song people forgot."  
  
  
** She could not resist and sat down beside her, she wasn’t surprised when Lexa opened her eyes to look at her without losing the rhythm and without stopping play.  
  
 _ **  
"And I can't keep a girl, no."**_  she sang looking into Clarke's eyes. " _ **Cause as soon as the sun comes up, I cut 'em all loose and work's my excuse, but the truth is I can't open up..**_." Lexa sighed when that last verse snaked out from her lips.  
  
  
Clarke was lost in her deep green eyes, but did not look away. She saw behind those eyes a great sadness and she tilted her head curious to know why.  
  
  
" **But you don't wanna be high like me, never really knowing why like me, step off that roller coaster, all alone..."  
  
  
** God, Clarke felt her stomach tightened when Lexa's voice almost broke and instinctively caressed her thigh, trying to comfort her. Comfort that Clarke was sure she needed but Lexa was too proud or perhaps afraid to ask.  
  
  
" **You don't wanna ride the bus like this, trust like this, you don't wanna be stuck up on that stage singing**."  
  
  
Clarke saw her eyes become wet but despite this she does not pull away from her. Something was wrong and Clarke would have given anything to know what it was. She was lost in her eyes and her heart suddenly began to beat furiously in her chest.  
  
  
" **So let it go, so let it be..**." Lexa continued to sing in a small voice. " _ **Why you don't be you and I be me."  
  
  
**_ Clarke swallowed biting her bottom lip because more than once in those days she would have wanted to be herself.  
  
  
" _ **Everything is wrong... why you don't be you and I be me?"**_ Lexa asked, tilting her head toward her. " _ **And I be me..."  
  
  
**_ Lexa did not add anything else, if not the movements of her hands as if she was trying to impress the rest of her feelings in that melody. Clarke was enchanted by how those fingers that apparently seemed so strong and able to write only numbers, could create that soft and delicate beauty.  
  
Uncontrollably, Clarke began stroking up and down her thigh. The music went diminishing and the silence wrapped.  
  
“You're very talented.” Clarke muttered and she meant it.  
  
Lexa smiled softly and for a moment Clarke thought she saw her cheeks tinged red at the compliment. This brought Clarke to stroke Lexa’s leg with more intensity.  
  
“My mother was a great teacher.” Lexa justified herself with a shrug. “And if you like, playing the piano is not that difficult, I assure you.”  
  
Clarke shook her head. “I am good only with art, brushes and colors.”  
  
There was another moment of silence and finally Lexa stood up, pushed the girl forward and Clarke found herself on the edge of the long stool but before she could protest she felt Lexa's chest against her back and her legs to the sides of hers .  
  
“Lexa, wha-”  
  
“Shh.” Lexa shushed her gently taking both of her hands and resting them on the piano keys, showing her the exact position. “It's not the most comfortable position and I can not teach you much.” she explained, leaning on her shoulder, their cheeks touching. “But I remember that this was the way my mother made me passionate about the piano.”  
  
She laid her hands over Clarke and then with gentle moves, Lexa helped her to move the piano keys in the right sequence.  
  
“I'm playing, Lexa!” she exclaimed with wide eyes. “I've never played anything in my life!”  
  
Lexa laughed, low and husky right in her ear, making Clarke shiver. “Yes, Clarke, you're playing.”  
  
“Again.” she said. “Do it again.”  
  
Lexa settled Clarke's fingers on other keys and repeated the process, they did it for five minutes and every time that Clarke was producing some sounds, she would not stop squealing, making Lexa laugh. Lexa finally let go of her hands and when she started to get back, she felt the warm palms of Clarke's on her thigh.  
  
“What are your plans for tomorrow?” Clarke asked softly. “If you have to go back to Washington for work-”  
  
“I do not have to go back.” Lexa assured.  
  
“So all those calls? Has something serious happened?”  
  
Clarke knew she was pushing herself too much with all those questions but the day had been rather strange and Lexa behavior had worried her.  
  
“Nothing happened.” Lexa replied instinctively and rested her chin on Clarke's shoulder.  
  
It was an insignificant gesture but at the same time so intimate that made very clear to Clarke that something was wrong. Lexa had never thrust so far with her, a little for respect, but also for confidentiality.  
  
"It is a very important project that was supervised by Anya while I was gone." She explained.  
  
“That's why you were so pensively all day?” She asked. “What did make you want to sing this song? Shouldn't you be happy for the end of this project?”  
  
Lexa sighed heavily and closed his eyes. “I am.” she said softly. “But at the same time I'm terrified, I know that makes no sense but I stopped for a long time to try to shed light in my mind.”  
  
Clarke slightly turned her face and found herself one inch from the girl's cheek, she looked at her profile: the nose, beautiful mouth, the mole on her top lip.  
  
“So, I think we know what we will do tomorrow” Clarke said finally looking back at the piano.  
  
“Hmm?” Lexa asked confused, opening her eyes.  
  
“Where is this place?” Clarke asked curious, pushing a few piano keys.  
  
“Clarke ...”  
  
“Where, Lexa?”  
  
There was a long moment of silence and finally Lexa sighed defeat. “Africa.” she said. “Nigeria to be exact.”  
  
Clarke frowned, intrigued to learn what kind of project Lexa had completed in Africa.  
  
“How long does it take from here?”  
  
“Six hours, maybe six and a half.”  
  
When Clarke did not respond immediately, Lexa shook her head: that was a madness, when she had planned that week, she had known from the beginning that probably she would not be able to attend the inauguration.  
  
“Well, then it's time that we start to pack, Lexa!” Clarke said slapping her thigh.  
  
“Ow!” Lexa protested indignantly jumping up to get away from those dangerous hands.  
  
Clarke walked away from the stool and smiled. “Have I ever told you that I have always wanted to see Nigeria?” she asked rhetorically, crossing her arms.  
  
Lexa just smiled and did not have enough time to say thank you that Clarke turned walking up towards the hotel, leaving her alone and stunned.  
  
“Come on, Lexa! The suitcases do not prepare for themselves!” 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song of the chapter is I Took A Pill In Ibiza cover by Conor Maynard the piano version, have a look if you want here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqG7klPbais


	9. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally we find a bit of what has happened in Lexa's past :)  
> Fifth stop of their week and sorry for any mistakes

**Chapter 8**

 

Lexa ran her hands on her jacket, trying to control the anxiety that gripped her stomach. Despite being tired, she had not slept during the trip. She had dozed off a few hours later, in the hotel room that Anya was able to find at the last minute in the capital; a small room with a double bed, very different from those they had lodged in the previous days but they had not found anything else at such short notice.  
  
Tiredness had helped both not to argue that they were about to share a bed and they were asleep immediately. Lexa went out silently, leaving Clarke to rest and she had met Anya to supervise the opening and inauguration. Given the sweltering of the day, they had decided to move the ceremony to the evening, at the going down of the sun, trying to avoid the hottest hours.  
  
Lexa was back in the room in the afternoon, tired and sweaty, only to find Clarke sitting on the bed with wet hair. Lexa had smiled gently apologizing for the long absence and she had explained the plans for the rest of the day. After taking a shower, Clarke had suggested that she should rest, as her and Adam were going to find something for dinner. After eating what Clarke had kindly brought, Lexa had begun to feel like a lion in a cage.   
  
She had spent her time walking back and forth across the room, running her hands through her hair, straightening her shirt and checking that everything was in the right place. Before Adam got crazy, he decided to escort Lexa to the appointed place and Lexa was there in that moment with sweaty hands and a head full of thoughts that seemed unwilling to leave her. Lexa jumped when a warm hand touched her shoulder and she turned to face the man who had become almost a father to her.  
  
“They would be all very proud of you, Alexandria.” Adam murmured tilting his head to the side.  
  
Lexa closed her eyes for a second, while one knot was formed in her throat at the thought of all the bad choices she had made in recent years and the latest five days before. Her mother would have looked at her with that sad look that had always been reserved for discussions with her father, her father would have looked at her with eyes full of disapproval and Costia... Costia would have been shuddered knowing the approach she had tried with Clarke.  
  
“I disagree." She said with a sigh. “They would be all very disappointed with how I led my life in the recent years.”  
  
“Lexa...” Adam sighed gently squeezing her shoulder. “We all make mistakes, we would not be human otherwise but the most important thing is realizing what we did wrong and fix it.”  
  
“I do not know how to do it.” she said in a weak voice. “I do not know how to solve these mistakes, I-” she stopped swallowing. “Look at Clarke, I did everything wrong with her and I'm sure that after this week she does not want to see me again and I cannot blame her for that.”  
  
Adam had no answer to that statement, he had found very bizarre the way Lexa had approached Clarke but he had been witnessing to the changes between the two. Yes, Clarke was initially unwilling, cold and distant but Adam had seen both make steps to get closer, to know each other and he was almost entirely sure that after that week things would not stop at once.  
  
“It's the moment.”  
  
Anya interrupted the conversation and Lexa tried to calm the beat of her heart and took a deep breath while Adam, after having tight shoulder again, walked away leaving her with her lawyer.  
  
“Are you ready?” Anya asked with concern. “I can d-”  
  
Lexa shook her head. “I'm ready.” she said confidently.  
  
The lawyer smiled proudly and walked away leaving her alone again, preparing to announce Lexa. A small stage had been assembled and Anya had done placing the chairs in the middle of what was once the center of the town, allowing people to sit neatly. She closed her eyes and let herself be guided by Anya's voice.  
  
“Now we can welcome Alexandria Woods.” Anya said aloud.  
  
A rumble of applause rose up from the people seated and Lexa wiped her sweaty palms on her legs again, then she took a deep breath but before she could reach the stage, she felt something touching her leg. She looked down and when her green eyes met a couple of black ones, a spontaneous smile was painted on her lips.  
  
  
Clarke found herself raising an eyebrow amused when Lexa appeared on stage with a baby in her arms and she felt Raven giggling beside her.  
  
“I was almost sure that Hassan would have required her full attention.” she said with a smile indicating the two on stage. “That little guy has a predilection for Lexa, when she's here he cannot let her go.”  
  
Clarke had no trouble believing it: the child had just buried his head in Lexa’s neck when a woman had climbed on stage ready to take him away. Clarke saw Lexa shake her head and squeeze him more, before turning finally to the small crowd that was waiting patiently.  
  
“Good evening.” she began with a small smile. “I wanted to thank everyone for being here.” she continued. “And a special thanks also to my lawyer and all the people who worked on this project with such great intensity.”  
  
Clarke pointed her gaze on Lexa completely hypnotized, despite the little boy who was hanging on her neck as if it was worth his life, Lexa still managed to convey a regality without limits.  
  
“This project has been an essential part of my life, it made these last six years very intense and worth living, just to be able to afford to see the end.”  
  
She came down from the stage, holding a protective hand on the child's back, while she reached the well.  
  
“This well bears my father's name: Alexander Woods.” she said as Anya had reached her quickly and passed her a pair of scissors. “I hope this will allow all the people who live here to not worry about the lack of water never again. With these scissors, I cut this ribbon and I start a new era of prosperity.” with a sweet smile she let the blades cut off in half the blue ribbon.  
  
The applause exploded and made Lexa's eyes shine with happiness, the woman smiled and shook hands with all the people who had approached to thank her. When the small crowd let her through, she headed in font of one of the two buildings in the center of the town, Lexa settled back Hassan in her arms and the child left the safety of her neck to look around.  
  
“This school, bears the name of my mother: Caroline Woods.” she said looking at the plaque with the name. “I hope this will allow all the children who live here to receive all the free education they need and to have fun while they do it. My mother always said: Culture is a right, not a privilege and everyone should have the benefit to enjoy it.” she continued stroking the child's back. “With these scissors, I cut this ribbon and I start a new era full of culture and education.” once again she let the blades cut off in half the red tape.  
  
Another round of applause accompanied Lexa’s march toward the last building, Clarke watched her deal with people with kindness and sweetness, shaking hands, offering smiles and continuing to hold the child in her arms.  
  
“This hospital, bears the name of someone who has been very important in my life: Costia.” she began, her voice a bit less joyful than before. “I hope this will allow all the sick people to receive the right care and carry on what an extraordinary woman has not been able to accomplish.”  
  
Lexa found Clarke's eyes in the crowd almost unconsciously and it was so spontaneous that surprised them both.  
  
“All this would not have been possible without her and I would have given anything for Costia to be able to be here to see the result of her work but I'm sure that wherever she is, she's watching the wonderful people who have made this place her home.” she looked at the people in the crowd and a sad smile curved her lips. “With these scissors, I cut this ribbon and I start a new era full of equality”.  
  
For the last time the blades cut in half the green tap and the people stood up and Lexa's cheeks were painted immediately in red. It did not take long before she was joined by people who wanted to talk to her, congratulate and spend some time with the extraordinary Alexandria Woods.  
  
Raven immediately joined her wife leaving Clarke sitting alone, but she did not care, she was too busy staring at Lexa's laugh with those people, clutching the little and helpless child to her chest. As had happened the night before in Amsterdam, Clarke was filled with a myriad of sensations that she should not have felt.  
  
That woman had made her way inside of her without being able to control it, opening again the little box that she had given her the day she agreed to marry her. Again Clarke felt overwhelmed by the events, from the way Lexa was proving every day, how she was different from the person she had always believed she was. Different from the arrogant woman who had approached her in the gallery, different from the woman who had asked her to marry her.  
  
She was altruistic, she was loving, she was wonderful.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes and tried to banish the thoughts, while some men began to move the chairs so that there was space to continue the celebrations.  
  
  
****  
  
  
A few hours later, Clarke found herself sipping her drink looking for a bit of refreshment. The night was hot and muggy and she could clearly hear the sweat on her skin and the only thing she could think about was a nice shower and a little bit of rest. After cutting the ribbon, Lexa had been sucked into the crowd of the people who wanted to spend some quality time with her. Clarke had watched her talking to each of them, receiving hugs and small gifts, while she was showing them the magnificence of the buildings she had built.  
  
Clarke felt strange, in front of her there was a different girl, _completely_ different from the one that she has always expected.  
  
The speech she gave, clutching the baby in her arms all the time and the tears that she had clearly seen shine in her eyes, made Clarke fully understand the magnitude of the pain that Lexa was hiding inside of her. That was the reason why, while Anya and Lexa did nothing but play with a very high amount of children, she had approached Raven during the evening looking for some more information: she was terribly curious about everything related to Lexa. Raven had not been able to tell her much of Lexa's parents because when she met the girl, the two were long dead.  
  
Clarke had asked her about Costia, but all she got in return was a small smile before Raven told her to ask Lexa, who would have been more than happy to fill the void, especially after that day. And it was what Clarke was finding the courage to do, sitting on the sidelines, her glass between her fingers and her eyes focused on the two women who were talking to a couple of men. The child who was on stage with Lexa had not left her to go all night, she was still holding him in her arms and he had his head resting on her shoulder.  
  
Clarke smiled. It was not the first time she saw Lexa dealing with a child, she had had a taste of that in Monte Carlo on the beach with Gabrielle, when she saw Lexa teaching her to use the stick. Just like then, Clarke felt a familiar tingling in her fingers and the desire to paint them caught her. She closed her eyes and tried to control herself, because it was not the time nor the place for such a thing. Clarke did not want to draw something so intensely since when she was a teenager, when she spent her days on the porch observing the beauty of the world around her.  
  
She did not open her eyes to understand that Lexa had joined her, feeling a presence at her side or breathing her perfume was enough. The thought made her swallow, because the fact of being able to distinguish Lexa's perfume was something far too intimate for her tastes. As always, she found herself drowning in her beautiful green eyes but what left her breathless was the beautiful smile on her lips.  
  
It was full of happiness.  
  
Clarke had seen Lexa smile mischievous, giggle, grin but never once she had seen such happiness in her eyes or on her face: it was short of intoxicating.  
  
“He eventually let you go.” Clarke broke the silence, referring to the child who had embraced Raven's good leg.  
  
Lexa smiled happily and nodded. “I am one of the first person who saw Hassan when he was brought here.” she explained. “He is very attached to me and every time I come here there’s no way I can escape from him and, to be honest, I don’t even know if I want to”.  
  
Clarke was enchanted: she never thought that someone like Lexa could love children but she could see how her eyes changed when she was in their presence.  
  
“And I suppose that you’ve often come here to make sure everything was arranged for the best.” Clarke said, glancing to the three buildings.  
  
“Not as much as I wanted to, but yes, quite often.” Lexa agreed. “It's not an easy journey, so I split the visits but I made it longer.” she explained.  
  
“It's wonderful what you did.” Clarke whispered after a long moment of silence. “It is a truly altruistic action and I'm sure all the people you have thanked are proud of you.”  
  
Lexa promptly looked away from her, watching Hassan and Clarke bit her bottom lip: she knew that Lexa was a private person but given the level of familiarity that they were beginning to have, it would not hurt to ask.  
  
“I do not think so.” Lexa said. “One good deed does not erase all the bad choices of a lifetime.” she whispered.  
  
Clarke scowled. “And all the bad choices, do not erase all the good deeds.” Clarke replied.  
  
Silence returned to reign between them and Clarke decided to drop the subject: it was quite evident that Lexa did not seem to want to talk about it.  
  
“I have done things that...” she began with a whisper. “I am ashamed at the thought that my parents know what I did and Costia...”  
  
“Do not feel forced to talk about it.” Clarke reassured her and as the night before, she slipped her hand on her thigh.  
  
Lexa looked at her hand and her heart began to beat faster and that small and seemingly insignificant touch made her feel special. “Costia was my girlfriend.” she said after a few minutes alone with her thoughts. “We knew each other since we were children, our fathers were business associates and she spent a lot of time at our house. My mother gave us piano lessons and it was our custom to spend the summers together.” she explained. “At first it was just a friendship but as time went on we both realized that the friendship was not the only thing that bounded us and we fell in love.”  
  
Clarke watched her profile and noticed the immense sadness painted on her face.  
  
“She was my first everything and I knew from the moment she told me she was in love with me, I'd married her.” she took a deep sigh. “I bought the ring and she wore it proudly for months, everything was ready, we just had to get married.”  
  
“What happened?" Clarke asked in a weak voice.  
  
“She was a Doctor Without Borders.” Lexa said. “She came here on a humanitarian mission after which she promised me that she would have stopped traveling and would have tried to get a job in a hospital...” she stopped, cut off the breath in her throat. “The jeep on which she was traveling was assaulted: they wanted the supplies of medicines that they were transporting, Costia has been involved and a gunshot hurt her in the stomach. There was nothing to do.”  
  
“Lexa...” Clarke muttered completely speechless.  
  
“We would have married the following week.” the words did not seem to want to stop. “When I received the news, my uncle had just expressed the desire to retire and wanted me and my cousin to get married but at the time the only thing I wanted was to disappear forever.”  
  
Clarke felt her stomach clench. She knew that story all too well, it was burned in her mind after that night in the diner.  
  
“So the night before my cousin would have taken posses of the family business, I got on my car and broken hearted I drove aimlessly through the city.” She went on. “I entered a diner to grab a coffee and then hit the road and vanish for good, but then I realized I couldn’t let that idler of my cousin to take everything my father has worked for, Costia would have never wanted that for me.”   
  
Lexa’s hands covered her tired face as she let out a deep sigh, while Clarke dropped her gaze, to hide the sadness in her eyes.  
  
“I convinced a girl to marry me, promising alimony for the rest of her life and then… I just went away and I never knew anything about her anymore.” She whispered. “I know that Anya is keeping my promise, but I have no idea where she is, if she’s well, or…” She stopped. “Sometimes I wish I had the gut to ask Anya where to find her.”  
  
Clarke swallowed the big lump in her throat, as all those informations started to swirl in her mind. She felt sick, as her head started to throb and for a moment she thought she was gonna have a panic attack.   
  
“Do you ever think about her?” She asked in a whisper.   
  
Lexa lift her face to look at the sky. “Every day.” She finally confessed. “And I really hope that my money helped her to create for herself a better life, that my pain, may selfishness have brought something good to someone else.”  
  
Clarke felt her heart clenching at the thought that now was the perfect time to tell her the truth, she should speak now:  
  
Then why her throat was on fire?   
  
Her stomach clenched?   
  
Her head spinning?  
  
She was afraid of how Lexa would react once discovered the truth, but she deserved to know, especially after opening up that way with her, letting her see her still wounded heart.  
  
“Lexa, there’s something you must kn-”  
  
“Woods, you better get your ass here!” Raven’s strong and clear voice broke into their little moment.  
  
Lexa had just the time to register her words, before Raven grabbed her hand forcing her to stand, she almost tripped on her own feet. Raven dragged her away and Clarke took a relieved sigh, knowing that, at least for the moment, she didn't have to sustain that difficult talk.  
  
She knew it was wrong, but that wasn’t the right time for that subject.  
  
She looked at the two friends, smiling when she saw Lexa trying to copy the moves of a tribal dance that she clearly didn't know. The children around her seemed professionals and all of them were trying to catch the attention of the two women, showing off their moves. And just as when Lexa got on the stage, Clarke felt a strange sensation running through her, seeing Lexa entertain all those children. All of them were tying to get her attention and she was doing her best to give it to not let anyone down, but when she saw the lawyer join the fun, Clarke was caught speechless.  
  
In that moment she realized how much Lexa and Anya were alike, but how a different woman the latter could be in the presence of her wife. She had the proof when Raven kissed her, whispering something on her lips making her smile as Clarke never saw her smile. A child, pulling the seam of Raven’s shorts to get her attention broke the spell, and Anya moved away to let her wife give him her attention.  
  
Clarke was surprised when Anya seated next to her, but she stayed silent, keeping her gaze on the two dancing women. Despite her brace, Raven lifted the child in her arms and placed him on her hip as she kept trying to replicate the dance moves as best as she could, while Lexa was under the assault of at least four of them.  
  
“Raven is… intense.” Clarke finally said, watching them.  
  
“She is.” Anya agreed, a sweet smile on her lips.   
  
“You really love her a lot.” She went on, watching how Anya’s gaze never left her wife.  
  
Partly because she was incapable to look away from her, partly because she wanted to check that Raven didn't tire herself up to much. When she didn't gave any answer, Clarke wasn't surprised: they never shared any information that wasn’t strictly professional, before. Still, she couldn't help wondering what Raven saw in someone like Anya.   
  
She was, without a doubt, a very attractive and good looking woman, but Clarke had never seen anything but a cold, serious expression on her face, at least until then. Anya’s eyes changed when she was looking at Raven, becoming so calm, relaxed and so filled with the love she had for her, that Clarke could feel all its power.  
  
“How did you met, the two of you?” She asked too curious to resist.  
  
“During college.” Anya answered giving her a distracted look.  
  
“And you’ve been together ever since?”  
  
“Sort of.” She shrugged, her eyes back on Raven. “We woke up together in the same bed after a party, we didn't know each other and even after all this years we still have no clue of what happened in that bed, if anything happened at all. I guess, there’s no real point to know now.”  
  
“I guess so...” Clarke tried not to sound to confused. “But you have to concede that it’s quite a… strange… way to make acquaintance with your wife?”  
  
At that Anya turned to her, a lifted eyebrow pointed at her. “Do I have to remind you how you met yours?” She asked rhetorically. “Because there would be a lot to say about it.”   
  
Clarke couldn't stop the hot flush that raised to her cheeks, it wasn’t about her and Lexa, and it was a completely different situation. “We are not in love…” she finally whispered, her eyes low.  
  
“We weren't either.” Anya pointed. “Look at us now.”   
  
“How did you get there?” She asked, she wanted to change subject, she was sure that the lawyer was ready to talk about the divorce file hanging in the air.  
  
Anya smiled at the memory. “We dated during all college, if sleeping with each other every night for three years could be counted like dating.” She explained. “But even if we hadn't put a label on what we were, neither she nor I ever saw anyone else.”   
  
“It kinda sounds like a relationship.” Clarke commented, amused.  
  
Anya nodded, her eyes trailed on her wife. “And the morning of our graduation, while we were… celebrating the end of our hard work and I was tied to the bed.” Clarke gaped, not sure anymore that she wanted to know how that story was going on. “She looked at me with those beautiful eyes and simply said to me: marry me.”  
  
“While you were tied to the bed?” She asked bewildered.   
  
Okay, _maybe_ that proposal was even stranger than her own.  
  
“And what did you say?”  
  
“Just yes, there was no one else for me and there wouldn't ever be in the future.” She shrugged. “We called Lexa to tell her to meet us the next day at the town hall.” She went on. “And with a private, simple ceremony we chose each other for life.”  
  
Clarke kept studying the way Anya was watching her wife, her face seemed brighter every time she talked about Raven, or she looked at her, or just thought about her.  She couldn't help to notice how alike Anya and Lexa were, how they put themselves one hundred percent in whatever they did, and suddenly she noticed another similarity. She finally remembered where she saw the same light that brightened Anya’s gaze every time Raven was involved... it was the same way Lexa had looked at her when she agreed to travel to Africa with her.   
  
“I know that you won’t listen to me and that it’s not my business.” Anya said, standing up and staring at her. “But I saw how things had changed between the two of you and I think you really should make a decision, Clarke.”   
  
She didn't say anything else and, after a long, silent stare, she walked away, leaving her alone with her thoughts and Clarke could feel again a sense of guilt running through her. She had the perfect chance to tell Lexa the truth and she had let it slip through her fingers and she was sure she wouldn't ever had another chance like that.   
  
She watched Lexa as she laughed when Hassan buried his face in the crook of her neck, trying to claim her, and she felt a rock falling into her stomach.   
  
What the hell was she doing?   
  
  
  
****  
  
Lexa opened the door quietly, trying not to make any noise and when the outside light reached the bed in which Clarke was sound asleep she quickly closed it. It was late, she had stayed with Anya to set the last details for the definitive opening of the three buildings, while she told Clarke to go and rest, asking Adam to escort her to their room.  
  
Two and a half hours had gone by since, when Lexa finally decided to get some rest, even for a few hours. She reached her suitcase taking out what had become her pj during that trip: she used to sleep naked, but since she had to share a bedroom with Clarke she opted to wear loose shorts and a tank top.  
  
She took a shower and followed her usual night routine, before silently slip off the bathroom. She grabbed the blanket she’d asked the reception and flattened it on the floor, hoping that there was another pillow in the closet.   
  
“Lexa, a-are you back?” Clarke’s raspy voice reached her like a cuddle, as the girl seated on the bed, looking for her in the darkness of the bedroom.  
  
“I didn't want to wake you up, I’m sorry.” Lexa stammered embarrassed.  
  
A long silence followed before Clarke let herself fall back on the bed.   
  
“Don’t you even think to sleep on the floor.” She finally stated. “Come to bed.”   
  
“The floor will be al-” Lexa protested.   
  
“Do not argue with me, Lexa, not this late at night.”   
  
Lexa stayed still in the middle of the room for a long time, gazing at Clarke’s silhouette on the bed and finally, seeing her patting the empty place at her side, she let the blanket fall on the floor.  She approached the bed slowly, taking a few more second before lifting the covers and slipping inside beneath her. Clarke was laying on her side, her hands under her cheek to hold her head and her chest raising and falling with her soft breath.   
  
_She was gorgeous.  
  
_ Lexa forced her eyes to close, forbidding herself to take actions she could later regret, trying to surrender to her tiredness. She felt the body beneath her shift and she blinked, meeting Clarke’s blue eyes, red and tired.   
  
“I really didn’t mean to wake you up.” She repeated, guilty. “I tried to be quiet.”   
  
“It’s okay.” Clarke assured with a sweet smile. “Is all ready for tomorrow’s opening?”   
  
“All ready.” Lexa confirmed.   
  
Clarke closed her eyes back, sighing contentedly. “Then you better rest, Miss Woods.” She muttered. “It’s been a long day.”  
  
Lexa didn’t answer, she turned on her side to watch her better and she bit her bottom lip. “Thank you for coming here with me, Clarke, I really appreciate it.” When she looked back at her, Lexa thanked the darkness that was hiding her insecurity on its features.   
  
“Thank you for having me.” Clarke answer. “And thank you for sharing with me a part of your past.”   
  
_'I would share everything with you, Clarke.'_ She wanted to say, but she decided just to smile.   
  
“Thank you for listening.” She finally said.  
  
Clarke giggled. “Maybe we should quit the thanking and try to sleep.”  
  
Lexa smiled and nodded staring intently at her, she saw a loose strand of those beautiful blond hair cover those perfect eyes and she couldn’t stop herself. She reached to it, moving it from her face and stroking lightly her forehead with a thumb, and she couldn’t help following the soft curve of her cheek. Clarke felt her heart beating furiously in her chest and her throat closing, stopping her breath, when she saw Lexa’s stare linger on her lips a moment too long. For an instant, just one crazy instant, she hoped to close the distance between their mouths.   
  
But just as it had appeared, Lexa’s hand retreated and Clarke was free to breathe again.   
  
“Goodnight, Clarke.” she whispered.   
  
Clarke swallowed, trying to summon her voice. “Goodnight, Lexa...”  
  
When Lexa gave her a sweetly smile, turning her back at her, Clarke turned her face to the ceiling. She stared at it for what seemed an eternity, strangely fascinated by a little crevice on the otherwise smooth surface, as she tried to tame the wild beating of her heart.   
  
Only hours later she finally slipped in morpheus embrace.

 

 

 


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the late uptade the work has kept me really busy.  
> They had to make an unscheduled stop ;)
> 
> The first five chapters had a different Beta but from the comments I read that she has not done a very good job, so I will ask the Beta I have now to fix them, sorry for the inconvenience. 
> 
> Now, enjoy!

**Chapter 9**

  
Lexa ran her hand through her hair in frustration to say the least, as she watched Adam talking animatedly with the technician who he had managed to contact with such short notice. She had told the man she did not mind the cost of maintenance, as long as he was able to settle the jet in a reasonable time.  
  
She glanced at Clarke who did not seem troubled by the situation, in fact, she was looking around curious and was listening to two people at short distance speaking Italian with a fascinated expression on her face. Adam approached her a few seconds later, shaking his head in disapproval and Lexa raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
“He said it will not be ready until tomorrow.” Adam said full of disapproval. “I'm sorry, Miss Woods, I can always try to-”  
  
Lexa shook her head. “Do not worry, Adam, thank you anyway.” she put a hand on his shoulder. “Clarke was going to stop here for a few hours to meet some people.” she explained. “It means that we will extend our stay and leave tomorrow.”  
  
Adam nodded slightly, and before he could say anything, the other man came up to give him a little more information; Lexa took advantage of the moment to reach Clarke.  
  
“The jet will not be ready until tomorrow.” Lexa said, drawing her attention. “I suspect that we would be stuck here for the rest of the day, we'll get back on the road tomorrow morning. I am very sorry for this inconvenience, Clarke.”  
  
“Don't be silly, Lexa, these things happen.” she said waving a hand. “It will allow us to enjoy the Italian beauties a little longer.”  
  
Lexa smiles. “Another place you've always wanted to visit?” she asked amused.  
  
“Are you kidding me? Who has never wanted to visit Italy? It is one of the wonders of the world!”  
  
“And I'm sure that the three sweet damsels that we met in Amsterdam, who entertained you most of the night, making you return to the hotel practically naked wearing only my jacket, have nothing to do with this your Italian euphoria.” she said, raising an eyebrow and chuckled when she saw Clarke's expression.  
  
“What are you implying, Woods?”  
  
“Absolutely nothing.” Lexa agreed even more amused. “What was written in the mail? Where do they live? If it's not too far away we could rent a car.”  
  
“Lake Lecco.” Clarke said quickly pulling out the phone from her jeans pocket. “And according to the GPS, it is an hour and ten driv-”  
  
“I must tell you, Clarke: I'm impressed.” Lexa agreed. “What made you think that I would have consented to join them?”  
  
Clarke smirked and stared at her intently. “I would have made sure that you could not say no.”  
  
Lexa blinked a few times incredulous in front of those words and before she could reply, Adam joined her again to update the developments, leaving Clarke pleased to be able to silence her again.  
  
  
Twenty minutes later they were sitting in a convertible, Lexa driving and Clarke intent on seeking some songs for the trip. She had managed to call the girls from one of the airport phones and they arranged a specific meeting point and it did not take long for Lexa to rent a car with the GPS navigator. Clarke had jumped from one radio station to another, stopping occasionally to listen to the conductors speaking in Italian, a small smile on her lips and Lexa regretted learning only French in school.  
  
“This song is fantastic!” Clarke said raising the volume. “ _ **I never miss a beat! I'm lightning on my feet and that's what they do not see, mmm-mmm.**_ ” she turned to her curling her lips. “ _ **That's what they do not see, mmm-mmm!**_ ”  
  
Lexa giggled, throwing her a distracted look, before returning to point it on the road, trying not to miss the exit that the GPS navigator was showing her.  
  
“ _ **I'm dancing on my own, I make the moves up as I go and that's what they do not know, mmm-mmm.**_ ” Clarke leaned back toward her, almost resting her head on Lexa's shoulder.  
  
Clarke gave her a little nod, inviting Lexa to sing with her, but the girl shook her head, trying to concentrate on the road.“ _ **That's what they do not know, mmm-mmm. But I keep cruising, can not stop, will not stop grooving**_.”  
  
Lexa turned in the highway and she watched the GPS navigator indicating that she should have gone for that for many kilometers; this gave her the time to finally look at Clarke.  
  
“ _ **It's like I got this music, in my mind.**_ ” she put a finger to her temple and cocked an eyebrow. “ _ **Saying, It's gonna be alright!**_ ”  
  
Her long blond hair were moving with the breeze, her blue eyes were shining more that the sun, the smile that was painted on her lips left Lexa almost breathless.  
  
“ _'_ _ **Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play and the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake.”**_ she leaned toward her and began shaking the chest to the beat. “ _ **I shake it off, I shake it off! Come on, Lexa!”  
  
**_ Lexa chuckled and surrendered to the call of that melody, coming from a mother so artistic and lover of music had made her vulnerable under that point of view. Music was perhaps the only time when she felt free and carefree, something that enveloped her like a protective coat and that sometimes made her feel closer to her mother.  
  
“ _ **Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break and the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake. Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, I shake it off, I shake it off!**_ ”  
  
“That's what I was talking about!” Clarke exclaimed clapping her hands. “ _ **Shake it off, I shake it off!**_ ” she sang, raising her arms to the sky. “ _ **I, I, I shake it off, I shake it off!**_ ” she continued, moving to the music.  
  
“ _ **I, I, I shake it off, shake it off I, I, I, I shake it off, I shake it off!”**_ Lexa yelled, one hand on the wheel and the other towards the sky.  
  
“ _ **My ex-man brought` His new girlfriend, she's like, Oh, my god!”**_ Clarke replied putting a hand to her mouth in an expression of mock indignation. _**“But I'm just gonna shake.”  
  
**__**“And to the fella over there with the hella good hair, will not you come on over, baby? We can shake, shake, shake!”**_ Lexa replied with a laugh.  
  
Clarke stared at her completely speechless: watching Lexa so free and carefree was an image that would have been held tight. She would have given anything to be able to see her green eyes but they were hidden by a pair of Ray-Ban, which made her even more attractive than she already was. Clarke left her singing by herself for a while, looking at her smile, her lightheartedness and felt her heart beat faster. Every day she discovered an interesting new piece of Lexa and she had to admit that everything she was learning was wonderful.

  
****  
  
  
When they arrived at their destination, what they found was not what they were expecting.  
  
Chloe's house was exposed out on the lake and was surrounded by a fence. The girl had the keys of the fence and this gave the opportunity to access to a walkway that allowed to dive directly into the lake. There was a large garden and under a small gazebo, a table had been set ready for the lunch.  
  
Even though they had seen each other only once in a completely different situation, Clarke did not feel uncomfortable when she sat beside Chloe who was playing with her phone. Lexa on the other hand, after having changed into more comfortable clothes, as a white tank top and a pair of shorts, was sitting rigid on the other side of the table.  
  
The other two girls, Emanuela and Chiara, were in the kitchen to finish preparing lunch, leaving Chiara's sister, Elena, on the grass in the sun.  
  
“Why aren’t you in the kitchen?”  
  
Chloe looked up from her phones and snorted loudly. “I was banished from the kitchen.” she said.  
  
“Why?” Clarke asked in surprise.  
  
“Well, because I could have... accidentally blown up something... a few times?” she said with an amused smile.  
  
“Few times?” Emanuela's voice broke into the conversation, while she was holding two plates. “That's put it mildly.”  
  
“Look, what could have I known that the salmon would explode into a thousand pieces in the microwave? It was not my fault he had a desire to commit suicide!”  
  
“Which is why you have to stay far away from the kitchen.” Emanuela said, holding a plate to Lexa and then to Clarke. “You can go inside just to make coffee even if...”  
  
Chloe warned Emanuela with her eyes: she had already told an embarrassing story, she did not want other things to be added that would make her look really irredeemable. Chiara was the one to complete the sentence, while she's appeared a few seconds later with two plates in her hands.  
  
“She should tell you when she made the coffee with the mocha and she forgot to put the water in.” she said chuckling. “Fortunately, she has noticed it in time, before the mocha exploded but it was hilarious seeing her as she tried to open it, hot for being on the stove, without much success.”  
  
“Aren’t you hungry anymore?” Chloe growled between her teeth.  
  
Emanuela gave her an innocent smile and then after giving her a kiss on the cheek, that Chloe did her best to avoid, she left to go call Elena and took the last things they needed for lunch.  
  
“I'm sure that that cup of coffee, even after that little adventure, was wonderfully good.” Clarke tried to reassure her.  
  
Chloe sighed. “No, it was disgusting but despite this I can claim myself to be a funny person.”  
  
“On this we all agree.” Chiara agreed with a smile as she sat. “Let's say if you go out with the three of us, Clarke, you'll never get bored.”  
  
Clarke chuckled and nodded with conviction. There was no doubt about it, although they had spend little time together, she had been able to experience the truth of those words. She glanced at Lexa who was busy chatting with Elena and their eyes met for a second, Clarke smiled at her and she was surprised when Lexa returned the smile.  
  
After lunch, they were sitting on the grass chatting, sharing stories and future projects giving everyone the chance to digest the lunch they had shared. Chiara and Emanuela had prepared a different pasta tris, portions clearly not too abundant, and then they allowed to themselves some wine and coffee. When Chloe had opened the gate that overlooked the lake, where a large walkway allowed to dive straight into the water, none of them had thought twice about wearing the swimsuit.  
  
Clarke had been dragged in the water by Chiara, while Emanuela and Chloe, after teasing each other for a while, had begun to throw a football ball in the water, laughing and shouting as if they were the only ones present in the lake. Lexa was sitting on the walkway talking to Elena; she had discovered that she was a very cultured girl and she took an interest in her studies and her future projects. Meanwhile Clarke, left alone, took the opportunity to stretch herself with a swim. Her gaze, however, was immediately attracted to Lexa and Clarke did not left her even for a second.  
  
She was beautiful.  
  
Kissed by the sun, her hair tied in a braid to prevent them from falling over her eyes, the slight sweat beading her long neck, her undershirt was so narrow to appear painted on her and the long legs left uncovered by a pair of shorts that did not leave much to the imagination. Apparently, Lexa had not brought swimsuit and for a moment Clarke wondered if she did not forget it on purpose. Which person in the world leaving for Monte Carlo did not bring the swimsuit  
  
When even Elena slid into the water, a small smile appeared on Clarke's lips as she approached the walkway. Lexa had closed her eyes turning her face to the sky with a small and relaxed smile on her lips; Clarke bit her lower lip, considering what to do and finally she decided. Lexa jumped when a spray of water hit her directly on the face. She opened her eyes and found herself staring at a pair of blue and Clarke was staring at her from a short distance. Lexa straightened her back and raised an eyebrow in search of explanations but what she received in return was a smirk.  
  
“If you wanted to get my attention, you'd simply have to call my name.” she pointed out tilting her head.  
  
“Where would the fun be in that?” she asked, chuckling. “Why don’t you come into the water?”  
  
Lexa shook her head. “I'm fine.”  
  
Clarke closed her eyes not willing to accept a no for answer, so, she approached the walkway and the look she directed at Lexa told her exactly what were the girl's intentions.   
  
“Clarke, _no._ ” she said.  
  
Clarke stared at her for a long moment and then she snapped her hand, raising the water and wetting out Lexa completely. A growl escape from Lexa's chest when her eyes found Clarke.  
  
“Clarke!”  
  
“You have no more excuses, now you're all wet anyway.” she pointed out. “Even if...”  
  
Another wave of water reached Lexa making her gasp and stand up on the walkway. The look that Lexa gave her, told Clarke that she was in serious trouble. She was sure about it when she saw Lexa taking off with a quick gesture the undershirt and throwing it away before jumping into the lake. Clarke laughed and began to swim, trying to put as much distance as possible between her and Lexa. When Lexa resurfaced, Clarke did not think twice to flood her again with water hoping to disorient her enough to escaped from her side.  
  
“You can't run away for long, Griffin, when I reach you you'll see!” she said.  
  
Clarke just laughed again, swimming away as fast as possible, feeling Lexa that followed her.  
  
“You can run but you can't hide from me, soon or later I will get you.”   
  
“In your dreams, Woods.” Clarke chuckled doubling up her efforts.  
  
The sound of the water filled her ears up and became the only sound she heard, apart from the laughter of the girls who were throwing the football ball close to the shore. Soon her breathing became heavy and slowed, Clarke turned her head and she peeked over her shoulder finding only the smooth and motionless surface of the lake.  
  
“Lexa?” she asked softly looking around in search of the girl. The only answer she got was a slight gust of wind rippling the water around her. “Lex... AAAH!” Clarke yelled feeling something tighten her ankle, pulling her underwater.  
  
She resurfaced a few seconds later upheld by a crystalline laugh, green eyes and Lexa's smile. But she did not have the time to protest that Lexa grabbed her hands, bringing them behind her own back.  
  
“I told you I would reach you.” she said amused.  
  
Clarke tried to pull away but Lexa raised an eyebrow and pushed her against her chest, pressing their breasts against each other. They stared at each other for long, Clarke breathing hard and Lexa with a playful smile.  
  
“You should expect this, if you want to play with fire you must be ready to pay the consequences.” Lexa said.  
  
“And who tells you that I'm not ready to pay them?”  
  
Lexa was confused by those words and a shiver ran down her spine as she was held spell bounded by those blue eyes. Clarke held her gaze, a sly smile stuck on those inviting lips, lips that Lexa kept looking at. Her scent was intoxicating, so as that warm body tight in her arms. Lexa was cut off of breath, seeing Clarke look at her mouth for a brief moment before returning to look at her in the eyes.  
  
Lexa was unable to stop herself from getting closer, tightened her grip on Clarke's waist to bring her face to hers, allowing their breaths to blended and rubbed her nose with hers. Clarke closed her eyes, waiting and Lexa gulped, she was incredulous she was about to taste those lips that had long haunted her dreams and her thoughts.  
  
The pain exploded unexpected in the back of her skull and a violently impact pushed her forehead against Clarke's and the girl let out a surprised gasp.  
  
“What the-”  
  
“Apologize...” Chloe said with a guilty voice. “The idiot said one of her bullshit and I threw the ball to punish her but she dived into the water and...” she continued, indicating Emanuela with a vague gesture of her hand.  
  
Lexa growled, rubbing the back of her head with one hand before throwing the ball with a frustrated gesture. She heard a laugh behind her and the unmistakable sound of Clarke swimming away from her.  
  
“I'm so sorry” Chloe repeated grabbing the ball with a firm grip.  
  
  
  
“I don't think so.” Clarke protested, crossing her arms over her chest and turning her head irritated. “I will not be in the same team with Lexa, you're already forcing me to play, you can't force me to stay in the team with her.”  
  
“What did I do to you, Griffin?” Lexa asked confused, turning over the football ball in her hands.  
  
“What did you do?” she replied sarcastically. “You tried to drown me!”  
  
Lexa was about to protest but Elena's voice stopped her words.  
  
“It's true.” she agreed. “But after that it seemed she was more than willing to save you with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.”  
  
Clarke felt her cheeks on fire and Lexa smiled embarrassed. “I am teaming up with Elena and Chloe.” Clarke decreed, ripping the ball from Lexa's hands and walked away across the meadow.  
  
Emanuela and Chiara raised their shoulders, looking at Chloe with confusion.  
  
“Did we miss something?” Chiara asked confused, getting only a smirk from her sister.  
  
“Let's go play, go.” Elena said with a smile reaching Clarke.   
  
  
  
Chiara dodged the tackle of her sister, snapping to the side and looked up in search of her teammates.  
  
She saw Lexa breaking free from Chloe's pressure and snapping forward, the body turned in her direction and she raised her hands to draw her attention. Chiara nodded and threw the ball as Lexa's hands grabbed it firmly.  
  
“Lexa, here! I'm free!” Emanuela shouted.  
  
Lexa looked up at her but before she could throw the ball, a body reached her, causing her to lose the balance and ending up on the grass.  
  
“Tackled.” a playful voice murmured a few millimeters of her face.  
  
Lexa blinked her eyelids a few times in surprise, being charmed by Clarke's beautiful blue, she did not realize when the girl stopped both her hands above her head. She found herself swallowing in having the perfect view of Clarke's breasts, which from that position appeared even bigger and tempting. Thankfully for both, Clarke got up a few seconds later and Lexa returned to breath regular and she sat up. She tried to free her mind from the feeling of Clarke’s hot and sweaty body above her but her eyes were on the girl and Lexa was charmed by the way the sun lit Clarke’s wonderful body.  
  
With a loud snort Lexa dropped herself back on the grass and put her hand on the face almost desperately. “I'm screwed.” she muttered.  
  
“You will be if we lose." Emanuela said, throwing the ball on her stomach. “Lift up your ass, we have people to tackle, I will not allow Chloe to win.”  
  
Lexa smiled and got to her feet ready to get back into the match, she could not wait to be able to tackle Clarke.  
  
  
  
The game went on and to Emanuela’s scorn, it was the team composed by Clarke, Elena and Chloe who took the victory home, she strongly suspected that the girl played badly on purpose. Setting the dinner table was way easier than lunch, Emanuela and Chiara took again the control of the situation, cooking meat on a big barbecue, so that they all could eat under the stars. Rivers of beer flowed and, between jokes and laugh, Emanuela got out of her secret stash another of her little gifts for all of them. Clarke immediately accepted and this time, under their surprised looks, even Lexa smoked with them. Soon they all were laughing, while exchanging funny and interesting anecdotes.  
  
“Oh, Look, a falling star!” Emanuela shouted, pointing the sky.  
  
Only a wide spread of stars in the blue welcomed their gazes when all the others looked where she was pointing.  
  
“Manu... are you sure you’re okay?” Chloe asked, amused.  
  
“I saw it! It was there!”  
  
Chiara’s hand patted jokingly her head. “Well, it’s not the first time you’re seeing things…”  
  
“Did you take your medicine today?” Elena joked.  
  
“Screw you.” Emanuela grumbled, getting up as she produced two more joint from her pocket. “I guess that I’ll smoke these babies with my imaginary friends.” She stuck her tongue out to them and turned away.  
  
“Come back, grumpy face.” Chiara laughed “You know that we love you.”  
  
Grumbling, Emanuela seated back, as far as she could from her treacherous friends, as Clarke and Lexa giggled. Silence fell and for a long moment the only sounds they could hear were the distant lapping of the water on the shore and the gentle puffs they produced as they smoked.  
  
“The sky is so clear here.” Clarke sighed. “I would have liked to learn the constellations, but I never had the chance.”  
  
Chiara shifted at her side in a cloud of smoke, nodding to the starry sky, she pointed the burning end of the joint out to a group of stars hanging low on the horizon.  
  
“That’s the easiest constellation to spot.” She murmured, passing the joint to her. “The dipper. Can you see it?”  
  
Clarke gazed at the spots of light Chiara was pointing, following the aerial patterns her fingers were drawing, showing her other stars spread around the dipper to form a more complex constellation.  
  
“… And that’s Ursa Mayor, the big bear.” She explained with a little smile. “But I prefer calling her with her human name: Callisto.”   
  
“Callisto?” Lexa asked curious, passing the joint to Chloe “You mean, Xena’s enemy?”  
  
“Are you telling me a cultured woman such as yourself, doesn't know the Ursa Mayor legend?” Chiara joked, winking in Clarke’s direction and making her giggle . “It is not the same Callisto, anyway.”   
  
“Mythology was not a subject my teachers cared to explore, nor to make me passionate about.” Lexa answered with a shrug.  
  
“Well, you’re lucky to have the right person to fill that lack, right here.” Elena said around a puff of smoke, starting to lightly jab her index finger in her sister’s side. “Story?”  
  
Chiara gave her a sideway glance, snorting. “I’m too high for that…”   
  
“Come oooon, pleeeeaaaseee.” Elena sing songed, keeping her poking.  
  
“I really would like to hear a legend too.” Clarke stepped in, giving her a little nudge with her shoulder.  
  
“All right, but I’m gonna need help, if you want a story you’ll have to work for it.” She stated, taking Elena and Chloe by a hand to help the up.  
  
Clarke got comfortable on the soft grass, her elbows pointed on her knees and her head resting in her left hand, eager for the show.  
  
“Callisto.” Chiara started, resting her hands on Chloe's shoulders. “Was one of the Nymphs Artemis used to hunt with.” She went on, draping an arm around Elena’s waist. “Now, our Artemis was very strict with her friendships.” She explained with a nod. “All of her maiden had to take a vow.”  
  
Elena wiggled out of her sister’s grasp and stood in front of Chloe. “Look, babe.” She said with authority. “If you want, you can join my company of bitches, we like to run naked in the woods and to kill innocent creatures, but if you lose your V-card, I’ll make you regret the day you were born.”  
  
Clarke and Lexa laughed hard at the exchange, as Chloe answered with a simple “ _Ok.”_    
  
“Life went on happy and quiet for Callisto. She enjoyed herself shooting arrows to poor innocent animals with Artemis and her bitches, and then they took long group bath and braided each others hairs. Until, one day…” Chiara let the sentence hanging in the air as she kneeled at Emanuela’s back, stealing the joint from her lips and taking a long drag of smoke before passing it to Elena who was combing Chloe's hairs with her fingers. “Zeus was strolling around the woods, not a though in his mind, when suddenly, zan zan! His eyes were captured by Callisto’s beauty.” At those words, Chloe stepped away from Elena, lifting her hands to her chest in shyness, while Emanuela got up, pointing to her with her finger.”  
  
“Heeeyyy thereee, sexy ladyyy!” She exclaimed getting closer to her, squaring her shoulders and lifting her chest. “Would you like to dance the horizontal tango with me in those bushes?” She asked, grabbing her from her waist and taking a drag of smoke before passing the joint to Lexa.  
  
Chloe escaped her embrace, assuming a scandalized expression as she lifted her hands back to her chest. “Why, Zeus! You’re a married man and I resent the penis! I would never put it out for you!”  
  
Clarke and Lexa howled with laughter, while Elena doubled over, coughing a cloud of smoke. Laughing, Chiara made sure her sister was all right, and then she resumed the story as Elena went looking for a glass of water.  
  
“But, as most people know, Zeus wasn’t famous to take a no as an answer, so Callisto ran away in the woods.”  
  
Chloe started to run in circles around them, followed by Lexa and Clarke’s laughter.  
  
“He was said to be a true dick head.” Chiara went on, taking back the joint. “Zeus was also a lazy ass, and the last thing he wanted was running after Callisto, so he decided to deceive her.”   
  
She stepped to Lexa, stretching an offering hand to her, to invite her to take Elena’s place. Lexa didn't move for a long moment, but then Clarke convinced her giving her back a gentle push. Chiara drove her at Emanuela’s back and wrapped an arm around her friend’s shoulders.  
  
“So, in a sudden inspiration, Zeus magically disguised himself as Artemis, to seduce Callisto with the form of the Goddess she loved.”  
  
She told puffing smoke on Emanuela's face as she started to sway in the cloud of smoke and then moved to Lexa’s back, pushing her through a new cloud of smoke. Lexa tried to muffle a giggle and to enter the part.  
  
“Finally transformed, Zeus called Callisto in Artemis’ voice, knowing that the nymph would answer.”  
  
Chloe stopped running, suddenly embarrassed, and stepped beside Lexa who took one of her hand in her own.  
  
“Callisto.” Lexa whispered in a raspy, sensual voice. “My loyal maid, let me show you my gratitude for your loyalty.” She went on wrapping her arms around her and leaving a small kiss on the tip of her nose.  
  
As soon as Lexa let her go, Chiara quickly took hold of her friend, well aware of the crush Chloe’d developed for her since they first met in Amsterdam.  
  
“So, poor Callisto, deceived and impregnated by Zeus, went back through Artemis’ nymphs, keeping those events secret, until one day, Artemis ordered her to undress and to take a bath with her and her maiden, forcing her to reveal her pregnancy.”  
  
“How could you betray me?!” Lexa growled, pointing her index finger on Chloe’s chest.  
  
“Before the poor nymph could tell her about Zeus’s trick, Artemis turned her in a bear.” Chiara blew a cloud of smoke on Chloe, who screamed and squatted on the ground on all four. “Later on, she gave birth to a little boy, called Arcade, who was raised by the king of that region. One day, while walking in the woods, Arcade met a big bear and immediately readied an harrow in his bow to kill it, without knowing it actually was his own mother.” She went on, calling Elena to join them again and placing her in front of Chloe in a menacing position.  
  
“Finally Zeus realized how much of a son of a bitch he was and decided to make amend. He came in a powerful wind and stole the both of them to the sky, placing them among the stars.” She said, as Emanuela ran away, dragging Elena and Chloe by the hands. “Since then, Callisto and Arcade shone in the sky as Ursa Mayor and Ursa Minor.” Chiara concluded.  
  
Clarke clapped her hands enthusiastically, soon joined by Lexa who let herself fall back on the grass at her side. The four friends stepped in a line in front of them, taking a bow.  
  
When Chiara seated back near her, Clarke stole the joint from her fingers, leaving a small kiss on her cheek.  
  
“Thanks for the story.” She said with a sweet smile.  
  
Seeing the cheeks of her friend turn scarlet, Emanuela convened it was time to open another beer for her.  
  
  
  
It was just past eleven p.m., when they finally decided that it was time to pitch the tents where they would have slept. Chloe and Lexa offered for the job and Elena unwillingly proposed to help, but in the end she just watched, giggling in a corner, while the two of them quarreled to establish who was the dominant Alpha in that situation.   
  
Clarke stayed with the other two girls, to help them tidy up and clean the dishes, even though her eyes kept following Lexa’s movement as if she wasn’t capable of letting her out of her sight for more than a few minutes. Emanuela and Chiara couldn’t help but notice.  
  
“So, how is it going with your ‘ _not girlfriend’?_ ” Emanuela asked curious.  
  
Clarke looked at her for a long moment, giving her a simple smile, but she didn’t answer. She didn’t mean to be rude, but she wasn’t sure herself of what was going on between the two of them, and the situation grew more intricate with every passing day.  
  
“We don’t mean to intrude.” Chiara explained. “But, how is it that you’re not a thing? I mean, it’s clear you care for each other and the tension between the two of you is so thick it can be cut with a knife.”  
  
Clarke took a deep sigh. “It’s complicated.” She finally said after a long moment of silence. “Our relationships is very complicated…” Her eyes found Lexa again.  
  
She would give everything to change it. She wished things were different between them. She wished she had the gut to tell Lexa the truth. She wished to be the reason for the smile she could see on Lexa’s lips, for the rest of her life.   
  
“How come?” Emanuela asked, curious. “That girl dies for you, Clarke.” She pointed.  
  
She knew and her stomach clenched hearing that truth from someone else. She knew that what Lexa was feeling for her at that point was way beyond simple lust or desire of conquest. She knew how Lexa cared for her in the moment she’d showed her how vulnerable she could be, and keeping the truth from Lexa was slowly killing her.  
  
“There’s someone else involved.” She finally sighed.  
  
“Another woman?” Chiara asked.  
  
“Another man…” she murmured.  
  
They stared at her in silence for a long moment and for some strange reason she felt judged.  
  
“You weren’t joking saying it’s complicated.” Emanuela giggled nudging her with her shoulder. “Don’t worry, we won’t dream to judge you.” She pointed. “We’re just curious and we know how complicated relationships can be. I’m sure you will find a solution.”  
  
“You care for her.” Chiara pointed with a smile. “It’s way too obvious you do.”  
  
Clarke’s cheeks flushed a little. “How could I not?” She asked. “Lexa is special.”she smiled turning to Lexa who was snatching a handful of pegs from Chloe’s hand.  
  
  
  
After a long string of unfeminine curses, a little shouting and an impressing amount of frustration, the two tents were fiercely standing in the middle of Chloe’s garden, ready for the night. Clarke and Lexa took one for them, ready to have a good night rest before the long journey waiting for them the next day.  
Adam had called an hour before, to let them know their jet would have been ready in the morning with no further delays. For a reason Clarke knew all too well, the four friends had disappeared in their tent the exact moment Lexa went to the toilet to get changed for the night.  
  
Clarke silently thanked them, she knew it wasn’t easy to share such a small space between four people, and she was grateful for their kindness. She crawled in her bedroll and she finally closed her eyes, taking a deep breath of the cool night air. A gentle rustle told her that Lexa was back, but she kept her eyes closed until she felt her lay down beside her with a tired sigh.  
  
“It’s been a good day.” She offered, watching Lexa nodding with a smile through her half closed eyelids.  
  
“I had way more fun than I expected.” She agreed.  
  
“Now you know what happens when you take away the pole you usually shove up your ass.” Clarke giggled, watching her face take an outraged expression. “You can’t deny that it’s true.”  
  
“Well, if that’s what you think about me.” Lexa growled, turning her back to her. “I wish you a good night, miss Griffin.”  
  
Clarke laughed softly, watching her as she tried to get a comfortable position in her bedroll, then her gaze was captured by a black mark on Lexa's skin, barely poking out of the rim of the tank top she was wearing as a pajama.  
  
“I like your back tattoo.” She muttered. “I had a glimpse of it today in the lake, can I ask you… do you mind to let me see it?” She cautiously asked.  
  
Lexa stayed still, not answering for a long moment, then she seated, slipping out of her tank top in a slow, deliberate gesture, apparently unconcerned of the fact she wasn’t wearing a bra.  Clarke dry swallowed when that field of amber skin unfolded before her eyes, which on their own accord trailed on the side of a perfect toned breast, before Lexa laid herself back on her bedroll, giving her her back.  
  
Clarke cleared her throat, trying to banish the flush running to her cheeks as she focused on the tattoo running along her sinuous spine. She instinctively lift her hand, but she managed to stop before her fingers could graze that warm skin.  
  
“May I?”She asked with a thin voice she barely recognized as her own, incapable of giving a more articulate form to her request.  
  
Lexa seemed to understand her anyway, and gave her a small nod. Clarke hesitated one more long moment, before letting her fingers graze the thin shape painted at the base of Lexa’s neck. Lexa shivered lightly under her touch, and Clarke could feel a new wave of warmth running from the tip of her fingers along her arm and then through her whole body.   
  
“It’s beautiful.” She whispered, following the drawing along Lexa’s perfect back. “If it’s not too personal, may I ask what it means?”  
  
Lexa shivered again under her fingers, and for a moment Clarke thought she wasn't going to answer. Then her voice broke the velvety silence of the night.  
  
“A circle for every member of my family.” She explained in a low voice. “My parents, my uncle, Costia, Anya and Raven.” She went on as Clarke kept tracing her fingers along her tattoo.  
  
“What about the seventh circle?” She asked curious.  
  
A long silence followed and Clarke could almost hear Lexa’s thoughts swirl furiously in her mind.  
  
“That is… is for the wife that I’ve never known.” She finally exhaled in a guilty whisper.  
  
Clarke felt her breath choke in her throat. That was the last thing she’d expected to hear. Her hand stopped on Lexa’s back, and before she could realize what she was doing she felt her lips start to move.  
  
“Lexa.” She whispered, her voice barely audible over the soft breath of the wind. “It’s me…”  
  
“IT’S HERE!” Chloe’s voice exploded right outside their tent, overcoming every other sound.  
  
Clarke had barely the time to register her words and turned to its source, when their tent zip opened and an overexcited Chloe got in holding her phone, her breath itched and her eyes sparkling. Lexa quickly lifted her tank top on her bare chest, turning on her side to watch the girl who seemed ready to hyperventilate.  
  
“Chloe, wha-”  
  
The girl got closer, her eyes big as she knelt, her phone pointed in front of her...  
  
“Clarke, do not move, there’s a Vulpix on your boobs.” She whispered excited.  
  
Clarke blinked in confusion “A-a what? She stammered.  
  
“A Vulpix, a Pokémon.” Emanuela answered her as her head peeked inside the tent “It’s kinda rare, so please don’t move while she tries to catch it.”   
  
Chloe nodded enthusiastically, getting closer, as her index finger swiped on the screen of her phone under Clarke and Lexa’s confused looks. “Yass! I got it!” she rejoiced. “In your honor, I’ll call it _Boobsy_ , Clarke.”  
  
At those words, Clarke couldn’t help her laugh to burst out of her chest, followed close by Emanuela as she shook her head, while Lexa opened her mouth, incapable to find any word. Chloe started to digit on her phone, then turning it to Clarke to show her the nickname she just gave to her Pokémon, making her laugh again.  
  
“Thanks, it’s really sweet of you.” Clarke finally said, amused.  
  
“Okay, I think you spoiled their quality time enough, let’s go back to our own tent.” Emanuela hinted, nodding her head to a still silent Lexa.  
  
Chloe’s gaze lifted from her phone to give Clarke another smile, only then she noticed something with the corner of her eye that froze her right on the spot. She slowly turned her head and she barely hold a squeak when she saw the piece of cloth that Lexa was holding on her bare chest.  
  
“I’m so sorry!” She stammered, crawling back. “I didn’t know you wer-were bus- okay, I’m leaving!”  
  
“Get your sorry ass out here!” Chiara shouted from outside “Leave them alone, you party crasher.”  
  
“I didn’t know!” Chloe answered in a guilty voice as she exited the tent “I’m so sorry, just go back to whatever you were doi-”  
  
“Let’s go!” Emanuela grabbed her out from her top. “Night night girls.” She said with a smile, zipping the tent close.  
  
Clarke jumped hearing a squeak of pain from Emanuela, as Chloe grumbled something to her, finally Chiara’s voice ended the fight before it got too nasty. Clarke giggled shaking her head and turning to watch Lexa who just slipped back in her tank top.   
  
“Before Ash Ketchum busted in, were you saying something?” She asked, lifting an eyebrow.  
  
Clarke intently stared at her, feeling all her courage drain into nothingness. She got the perfect moment, but with Lexa’s eyes right into hers, she just couldn’t find again the words she’d whispered just moments before.  
  
“It was nothing important.” She finally said.  
  
Lexa smiled and fell back on her bedroll, too exhausted even to keep her eyes open. Clarke laid at her side, holding a sigh as she studied her perfect silhouette. She was really scared of how Lexa would react once discovered the truth, but she would think about it another day, she decided as she closed her eyes and she let herself fall asleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I wrote this chapter (this summer), I was caught by Pokémon go fever XD I just wanted to remind you that Chole is 22 :) 
> 
> I will do my best to update next week but I don't know if I can, I go back to Italy for Christmas (I currently live in England) I'll try to do my best :)


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the late uptade but Christmas in Italy is madness :O  
> I wish you all a happy new year with this chapter!
> 
> The girls are back from their week, what will happen? ;)
> 
> Enjoy!

  **Chapter 10**

Raven and Anya's apartment did not change since the last time she saw it, even though she was quite sure that the sofa where she was sat in the living room and the coffee table were different.  
  
When she and Clarke landed in Washington, Anya had been waiting for them at the airport with a big smile and a few nice words of circumstance, before starting to remind Lexa her duties. While Adam was going to take the car, Anya had updated her on the developments and the lawyer had already listed the appointments that were waiting for Lexa.  
  
Lexa was surprised that Clarke had not run like hell as soon as they reached the parking lot, seing how they had found Raven sitting on the hood of the car, sunglasses on her nose, a mischievous smile on her lips and a revealing outfit: a pair of shorts barely covered her legs, a black tank top that was supposed to cover the red bikini she was wearing, in fact it did nothing but draw attention right on her breast.  
  
When Raven had invited Clarke to the gay pride, Lexa had assumed that she would have refused. The rest of their week was over, she had no more “obligation” but Clarke had surprised her by accepting willingly and with a big smile on her lips.  
  
Lexa had been even more surprised when Clarke had got in the car with both of them without hesitation. So Lexa had dismissed Adam and she had extended to him an invitation to attend at the parade, before climbing into the passenger seat beside Anya, looking worried at Raven in the back seat. She was starting to shell Clarke with lots of questions.  
  
At that moment Lexa was sitting on that new sofa in her lawyer apartment and she was watching Raven put makeup on her wife face.  
  
“Am I wrong or this is a different table?” Lexa asked no longer able to hold back her curiosity.  
  
“You're right.” Raven said, without turning around. “The other was broken, so it was inevitable.”  
  
Lexa frowned. “How did it break?” she asked confused.  
  
Raven gave her a casual glance but Lexa clearly caught the mischievous grin that was painted on her lips. “We celebrated our anniversary and we've let carried away by the moment.”  
  
Lexa was more and more confused. “But your anniversary is in a couple of months.”  
  
Raven chuckled. “I did not speak of our wedding anniversary.”  
  
There was a long moment of silence in which Lexa estimated the chance of going into that but she decided to let the subject drop, because she was sure that it was involved some sexual object that she wanted to stay unaware of.  
  
“I hope that at least the sofa has not been involved in such activities.”  
  
“Who do you think you are talking to, Woods? Of course it was involved!” Anya said with a laugh.  
  
“Stay still.” Raven warned.  
  
Lexa shook her head and raised the glass to her lips but a small smile curved her lips and once more she realized how much she wanted a relationship such as their one day. She watched them for a few more minutes and Clarke finally made her entrance into the room and Lexa had to rely on all her self-control to not allow her tea to go down in the wrong pipe.  
  
Lexa swallowed and her eyes pointed on the extended skin she could see. Clarke had made a knot to her plaid shirt that she had decided to wear, leaving open the top buttons allowing everyone to see the white bikini below. The knot was placed perfectly under her breasts, putting it even more in evidence and the shorts showed the wonderful skin of her thighs.  
  
“Anya, you look great!” Clarke said after looking at the work that Raven was doing on her wife.  
  
“Well, what did you expect? My wife is brilliant.”  
  
Raven bent down to kiss her softly at the compliment and Anya could not keep from deepen the contact.  
  
“Now it's Lexa’s turn!” Raven said, picking up the makeup, ready to reach the woman who was still sitting quietly on the couch.  
  
She could not finish pronouncing the sentence that Lexa began to shake her head. “Do not even think about it, I have already decided to come to the parade. I'm not letting you put makeup on me, no.” she said resolute standing up ready to escape.  
  
“First thing, this year you have no excuse not to attend.” Anya said. “Second, are you might daring to say no to my wife?”  
  
“I'm not daring, I'm doing it.” Lexa said, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
“Don’t you trust my wife?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
Lexa had no time to answer that Clarke took her hand and dragged her to the table, putting a hand on Lexa's chest and forcing her to sit on one of the chairs, then she took place immediately on her lap. Lexa had to count on every shred of her power to prevent herself to gaze down on the chest that Clarke had placed directly on her face.  
  
“I'll do it.” Clarke said shortly beating one hand on the table and inducing Raven to settle the makeup on it.  
  
“You are so obedient that if Clarke asked you to jump, your answer would be: how high Clarke?” Anya laughed at the sight of that little theater. “Good thing I have not eaten yet, at this rate I would probably throw up my lunch.”   
  
Lexa gave Anya a look but before she had the chance to speak, Clarke touched her forehead and gently pushed her head back.  
  
“Now be a good girl and don't move.” Clarke said quietly but not enough to prevent Anya to hear.  
  
“Yes, _little bitty Lexie,_ be a good girl and don't move. You don't want to ruin the work of your favorite artist, do you?”  
  
Clarke chuckled on her lap seeing Lexa roll her eyes in exasperation and then her expression turned. Lexa was enchanted watching the concentration on Clarke's face, making her, if possible, even more beautiful.  
  
A glint of pure joy graced those blue eyes, so close to her and Lexa found herself wondering if in the world could exist something else besides her art, to produce that special light. Lexa's heart skipped a beat when she found herself hoping to be able to be her the one to produce it, to unleash that glorious light, the sparkle that made Clarke lost and so happy.  
  
"Close your eyes." Clarke ordered, gently, his breath tickling her lips.  
  
Lexa swallowed. It was not possible Clarke wasn't able to notice the frenetic beats of her heart, which appeared to be crazy in her chest. Clarke's touch was precise and delicate on her closed eyelids and the caress of her breath on Lexa's face, made her shiver.  
  
“Open.” Clarke said that silken voice, so close that Lexa was sure if she had stepped forward, she might have kissed the source.  
  
_Blue.  
  
_ There was nothing but blue when she opened her eyes and Lexa felt everything shaking inside of her when she saw the beautiful smile on Clarke's lips.  
  
“That's it, perfect.” Clarke said softly before bending down to kiss Lexa's nose.  
  
And in that moment Lexa realized to be lost, completely, irretrievably lost for that girl with blond hair and blue eyes.  
  
“Disgusting.” Anya said, breaking the magic of that perfect moment.  
  
“You two want to sneak into our room?” Raven interrupted lightly. “Since me and Anya had sex on every surface of your property, Lexa, it seems fair to reciprocate by offering our bed.”  
  
Lexa gave the couple one angry look, that Raven received by blowing a kiss in her direction, before looking at Clarke.  
  
“Okay, Princess, take a seat, it's your turn to be rigged.”  
  
“Unless you don't want to stay on Lexa's legs all day...” Anya concluded with a smile.  
  
Clarke laughed and took a seat on one of the chairs beside Lexa and she closed her eyes, waiting for Raven to start to work.

  
///  
  
  
“I told you that we would be late!” Lexa said annoyed.  
  
“I would never have allowed you to come to the parade that way, so quit your whining Woods and move your ass.” Anya said without kindness, putting a hand on her back and pushing her through the crowd.  
  
It was not Anya's fault if her friend did not know how to dress up. When Lexa was entering into the living room after she 'changed', Anya had thought Lexa was about to attend a funeral and she realized that she would have never allowed her friend to go to the parade in such a state. And now Lexa made a different figure: a pair of ripped shorts that Raven had painted a few years earlier for the same occasion, they allowed everyone to take a look to her generous thighs. The shirt that Anya had lent her, kept falling over her shoulders, showing the skin of her neck and collar bones, her hair were tied in a braid hanging down over her chest.  
  
But Anya, in that moment, was quite worried about not being able to track down the Woods Corporation float in the midst of all that crowd and she was not sure that Raven would have been able to make inroads into all these people without feeling some pain in her leg.  
  
“I see Adam.” Lexa said loudly, pointing to a spot in the middle of the parade.  
  
Anya leaned over to look and she saw the man standing on the float without t-shirt and wearing a helmet painted with rainbow colors. Anya could not help but giggle.  
  
“They stopped for a moment, if we hurry, I'm sure we're able to reach them.” Lexa said.  
  
Anya sighed and appraised the options but she did not have time to think of a solution that Raven put a hand on her arm to get her attention.  
  
“Go with her and I will join you aft-”  
  
“Do not even think about it.” her wife said shortly, then she took her and made her way to the pit wall.  
  
Raven immediately understood her intentions and shook her head. “An, no.” she said firmly.  
  
“Rea, get up onto my shoulders or we will stay here together.” she suggested without giving her a chance to reply.  
  
Raven snorted loudly and joined her, aware that her wife would not have dropped the subject and that her threat had not been in vain; Anya would not move from there and she really wanted to participate in the parade. So, Anya helped her and then bent down on her knees, making sure that Raven got up on her shoulders before pulling up again, leaning her hands on Raven's thighs for support. Lexa turned and she was not surprised to find them in that position and she smiled, while she was making a sign with her head toward the float still stuck in the middle of the parade.

Anya began pacing, heedless of the people scolded when she did it and disappeared into the crowd, but before Lexa could reach her, she met Clarke's gaze. She paused for a moment to observe the pink, purple and blue makeup, that Raven had skillfully applied around her eyes and extending laterally into two colored stripes until the hairline above her ears.  
  
Makeup suited her damn right, bringing out the color of her eyes. Eyes that were staring at her with an amused twinkle. Lexa rolled her eyes and sighed heavily, then she took her hand and helped her to get up on her shoulders starting to follow Raven's figure into the crowd in front of them.  
  
“Lexa?” the irreverent voice of Raven caught up over the festive chatter that surrounded them. “How high are you jumping?”  
  
“Fuck you, Reyes!” Lexa shouted back.  
  
“Oh, do not worry, Lex.” Anya said amused. “It is what I plan to do after.”  
  
Lexa snorted loudly but smiled feeling Clarke's laugh over her head. When they finally reached the Woods Corporation float, they clambered above with Adam's help.  
  
“Beautiful makeup, Miss Woods.” he smiled looking at the rainbow stripes that extended horizontally from her nose just above the temples, drawing a colored mask around her eyes and going down in three long lines on her cheekbones.  
  
“Artwork by Clarke.” Lexa smiled.  
  
“You look like a giant gay raccoon.” Anya said with a grin.  
  
“Great helmet.” she said, completely ignoring Anya.  
  
“Thank you.” he said with a proud smile. “Grace has decorated it.”  
  
Lexa's eyes swept on the float in search of the girl. “Didn’t you bring her with you this year?” she asked curiously.  
  
Adam shook his head. “It's Kate's weekend, she took her to visit her grandparents. Too bad that Grace has lost the only parade where you actually decided to attend, Miss Woods.”  
  
“After the donation of one million dollars that she had made for “Trevor Project”, if Lexa had decided not to come, I would have dragged her by her hair.” Anya said with her usual kindness.  
  
The music was pumping from the large amplifiers that were settled on the float, making jump and dance the crowd that was surrounding it. Clarke was having fun like never before. She had helped Lexa, Raven and Anya to throw USB keys with the brand of the Woods Corporation on it, specially decorated with rainbow, toward the people.  
  
“So, Clarke, are you having fun?” Anya asked settling at her side against the rail.   
  
“A lot.” she said, surprised that Anya had approached her. She had always the suspicion that she wasn't her favorite person in the world.  
  
Anya chuckled. “I heard that in Amsterdam you had a lot of fun as well.”  
  
Clarke's cheeks turned red but she tried to hide it from the woman. “Really?” she said pretending indifference. “I'd like to remember that but unfortunately I was drunk and I got a couple of joints so everything is like a black hole.”  
  
“Oh, don’t you remember?” Raven said, wrapping her arms around Anya's waist and scratching her abs left uncovered by the sport top she was wearing. “Too bad, from what Lexa had told us, you're missing some interesting memories.” she chuckled, her cheek resting on one of Anya's shoulder. “Maybe we should fill this black hole, what do you think, my love?” she whispered in her wife ear, making her shiver.  
  
A new song started pumping through the speakers and Anya's lips curved into a sly smile.   
  
“I think you're a genius, my love.” she muttered, turning in her arms and placing a light kiss on her lips.  
  
_“_ _ **I’m so into you, I can barely breathe.”**_ Raven started to sing moving away from her, before pointing a finger at Clarke. _**“And all I wanna do is to fall in deep.”**_ she approached her with a sensual smile and then she shook her head in amusement. _**“But close ain't close enough ’til we cross the line.”**_ she didn't not have time to think about, she just grabbed Clarke's body and pressed against her. _**“So name a game to play and I'll roll the dice, hey!”  
  
**_ Raven began to move her hips without taking off her eyes from the girl. Clarke was looking at her with amused eyes.  
  
_**Oh baby, look what you started  
The temperature’s rising in here  
Is this gonna happen?  
  
**_ Clarke was able to feel Lexa's eyes on her back and she found herself smiling because of it. She put her hands on Raven's hips and the girl seemed more than willing to give to Lexa a nice show.

 _ **Been waiting and waiting for you to make a move  
(Woo, oh, oh, oh)  
Before I make a move  
(Woo, oh, oh, oh)  
  
**_ Raven put her open hand on the center of her chest, she reached down and shook her hips before going back on her feet, chaining Clarke with her eyes. Clarke jumped in surprise when she felt two hands on her hips and she gasped for a moment, when a firm breast pressed harder on her back.  
  
_**So baby, come light me up and maybe I’ll let you on it  
**__**A little bit dangerous, but baby, that’s how I want it  
  
**_ She turned her head, almost sure to find a pair of green eyes but she was surprise to collide with Anya's mischievous smile. Before she even said a word, she found her body squeezed between the two girls and they started to move together. **  
**

_**A little less conversation, and a little more touch my body  
Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you  
  
**_ “Move with us.” Raven whispered in her ear, throwing on purpose a glance at the girl behind them.  
  
_**Got everyone watchin’ us, so baby, let’s keep it secret  
A little bit scandalous, but baby, don’t let them see it  
  
**_ Clarke could not help but shiver and she closed her eyes, letting herself be guided by them, Anya's hands were moving on her torso without been to intrusive.  
  
_**A little less conversation and a little more touch my body  
Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you, oh yeah  
**_  
Clarke found herself spinning in their arms and when she opened her eyes she immediately swallowed. Lexa's green eyes were staring at her with such intensity that Clarke was thankful that Anya was behind her, because her legs became jelly.  
  
“She's waiting for you.” Raven whispered in her ear.

 _ **This could take some time, hey  
I made too many mistakes  
Better get this right, right,**_  
  
Then the girl turned in her arms, she put the back on her chest, Raven took her hands bringing them on her abdomen and she started moving her lower back against Clarke's belly. Clarke did not look away from Lexa even for a moment and she decided to dare. **  
**_**  
“Oh baby, look what you started...”**_ she was singing with a raspy voice. _ **“The temperature’s rising in here. Is this gonna happen? Been waiting and waiting for you to make a move.”  
  
**_ Those words were a challenge and for a moment she thought Lexa wouldn't take it, maybe too frightened to let herself go.

_**(Woo, oh, oh, oh)  
Before I make a move  
(Woo, oh, oh, oh)** _

 But Lexa stepped up, her eyes fixed on hers, her teeth holding on her bottom lip, as if she was trying to control herself. Anya smiled amused and glanced at Raven who stepped aside giving her way.  
  
_**So baby, come light me up and maybe I’ll let you on it  
A little bit dangerous, but baby, that’s how I want it  
A little less conversation, and a little more touch my body  
Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you**_  
  
Her hands found her hips immediately , as if they were dragged by an unstoppable force and Clarke couldn’t hide a satisfied little smile at that behavior. Lexa was always so controlled, so tensed, that even those small gestures let her know how on the verge of letting all go to hell she was.

 " **Got everyone watchin’ us, so baby, let’s keep it secret..."**  Clarke whispered in her ear, watching her shiver. " _ **A little bit scandalous, but baby, don’t let them see it**_." she mischievously went on, resting her hands on Lexa’s, right on her hips, and looking straight into her eyes she kept singing. " _ **A little less conversation and a little more touch my body."**_  she licked her own lips. " _ **Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you."**_  
  
Lexa clenched her jaw as her fingers held her hips more tight, her green irises were burning with something Clarke couldn’t identify, but she knew she was willing to burn with whatever it was.  
  
She went around her, feeling her shiver at the sudden lack of contact and she quickly ran her fingers to her stomach. She held her tight as she laid her head on Lexa’s shoulder, her lips inches away from her ear.

" _ **Tell me what you came here for, Lexa..**_." she sang. " _ **Cause I can’t, I can’t wait no more.."**_    
  
Lexa let out a little gasp that Clarke couldn’t identify, but it elicited her to scratch lightly on her abs. Lexa went limp in her arms, laying completely on her chest for support.  
  
" **I’m on the edge with no control and I need, I need you to know, You to know, oh..."**  
  
Clarke started to move her hips against hers, her mouth _so_ close to that ear that she was dying to take between her lips.  
  
_**So baby, come light me up and maybe I’ll let you on it  
A little bit dangerous, but baby, that’s how I want it  
  
**_ She closed her eyes, leaning in, her lips closer and closer to that tempting ear. _**  
  
A little less conversation, and a little more touch my body  
Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you  
  
**_Lexa lift a hand, trailing her fingers through those wonderful blonde locks, dragging her closer as if she needed their bodies to melt together and Clarke complied. Holding her closer, she let her hands trail down to her thighs and this time Lexa couldn’t hold the moan that escaped her lips.

 _ **Got everyone watchin’ us, so baby, let’s keep it secret  
A little bit scandalous, but baby, don’t let them see it  
A little less conversation and a little more touch my body  
  
"Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you." **_ Clarke sang breathless, as if in a prayer. Lexa turned her head, her forehead against her temple, looking for support, or maybe for all the scraps of contact she could have.  
_**  
Got everyone watchin’ us, so baby, let’s keep it secret  
A little bit scandalous, but baby, don’t let them see it  
  
**_ Clarke tilted her head and those green wells swallowed her, but for the first time she saw something new in them: pure lust. Lexa’s cheeks were flushed, her breath ragged between her parted lips and her gaze was begging her to do something, anything.  
  
So she did as she leaned in. _**  
  
A little less conversation and a little more touch my body  
Cause I’m so into you, into you, into you  
  
**_She felt Lexa’s breath stop for a second and she swallowed, _eager_ to finally taste those lips that she couldn't stop to think about. She got closer and closer, her nose to gently graze Lexa’s as she surrendered.  
  
_**So come light me up, so come light me up my baby  
A little dangerous, a little dangerous my baby  
**_  
“Woohoo, temperature is rising too much!” Adam shouted, from up close. “We better turn it down a little before we got arrested for obscenity.”  
  
At those words, Clarke immediately let Lexa go from her embrace, tacking a step back from her. Her eyes trailed to Anya and Raven that seemed to be completely lost in each other. Raven’s good leg was draped around Anya’s hips in an embrace too tight that she couldn’t see where one body finished and the other began. The kiss they were sharing was all but chaste and Anya's hands were holding Raven’s butt as they swayed with the music.  
  
She furrowed when Lexa stepped near her with a closed bottle of champagne in her hands and she lifted an eyebrow seeing her starting to shake it with a smirk. The pop of the stopper being shot to the sky passed unheard in the loud music, but not the cold liquid that streamed on the still kissing couple.   
  
“Get a room!” Lexa laughed stepping to them, the champagne still pouring on them from the bottle.  
  
To Lexa’s scorn, the two of them went on with their kiss. Raven’s fingers trailed down Anya’s arm, reaching her hand on her butt, and with a perfectly synchronized movement, they lifted their intertwined fingers to Lexa, showing her their lifted middle fingers.  Clarke laughed heartily at the gesture and Lexa turned to her with a lifted eyebrow, obtaining only an amused grin that pushed her to get closer to Clarke, lifting the still pouring bottle of champagne to her.  
  
“Lexa, don’t!” she admonished, pointing her index to her to stop her.  
  
Lexa didn’t answer, with her thumb on the opening, she shook the bottle and Clarke couldn’t escape the stream of champagne that followed, drowning her.  
  
“ _Lexa!_ ” she shouted, looking for cover.  
  
Lexa got closer and completed her fine work pouring the rest of the champagne right on the top of her head, laughing heartily at Clarke’s outraged face.  
  
“My vengeance will be merciless.” She sputtered with a growl.  
  
“Bring it on. Do your best.” Lexa challenged her amused.  
  
Soon a merciless champagne war started, Adam was the first innocent casualty, soon followed by the roaring crowd around them. No one noticed the cameras pointed right to their chariot.  
  
  
////  
  
  
They shut the door with a thud behind them as the light glimpsed before turning properly on, spreading a blueish light in the small room.  
  
“Really, An? A restaurant toilet?” Raven giggled, arching an eyebrow.  
  
They’d took advantage of a stop to slip away from the crowd, looking for some privacy and, maybe, a place to finish what they’ve started on the chariot.  
  
Raven wrapped her good leg around her thigh, dragging her closer, their hips met and Anya quickly bend her head to close her teeth on her wife’s tantalizing neck. Raven’s butt crashed against the sink as she moaned loudly, only the loud music of the parade to cover the sound.  
  
“Too mainstream?” Anya asked, trailing her hands on her breasts and gripping them tight.  
  
Raven tilted her head back, her eyes half closed and a playful smile on her lips. “Maybe.” She smirked.  
  
Anya smiled on her skin, her lips sinking to her chest to collect the remnants of the champagne Lexa poured on her, her tongue following the sweet valley between her breasts. Raven sighed, her fingers through Anya's hairs to guide her lower on her body, but Anya stopped, looking at her with lust filled eyes as she turned her in her embrace. She pushed her hips against Raven’s butt, trapping her against the sink.  
  
Anya let the tip of her nose trail along her wife’s shoulder, in a gentle caress. She followed along her neck, as her hands found again her breasts. When her teeth closed on the sensible skin under Raven’s ear, her hands gripped the loose tank top. With a loud sound the fabric ripped open on Raven’s chest.  
  
“I wanted to do that since you bought this rug.” Anya whispered roughly making a shiver run down Raven’s spine.  
  
“Why do you think I bought it in the first place?” Raven answered, remembering the famished look Anya’d given her when she first tried on the top in a little Washington shop. Anya smirked discarding the now useless piece of clothing and throwing it somewhere behind her back.  
  
The faint pluff that followed made them both turn their head.  
  
The top was half hanging from the toilet seat where it was unceremoniously thrown to drown. They watch it as it slowly slipped inside until it disappeared and then Raven turned to look at her.  
  
“Do we say it was Lexa’s fault?” she asked.  
  
Anya took her chin between her fingers, letting her tongue slip through Raven's parted lips. “That’s why I married you.” She finally whispered.  
  
They laughed as Raven's arm wrapped around Anya's neck, while she brushed her nose against her wife's.  
  
“I love you, Rae.” She whispered, letting her hand slip down her belly and inside her ridiculously short shorts.  
  
“I love you too.” Raven breathlessly answered gripping the sink as Anya's fingers brushed her hot, wet sex.  
  
“Happy pride, baby.” Anya barely whispered as Raven came, her name on her lips and their eyes locked in the mirror reflection.  
  
  
////  
  
  
Clarke had never felt so worried her whole life, as she held her phone, Lincoln’s shaken voice in her ear. Lexa was driving quite recklessly through Washington’s streets, unconcerned about the speed limits she was breaking and how much she would have paid for that.  
  
“Is Octavia okay? The baby?”  
  
“They just called, I’m on my way to the hospital, th-they said there’s been some complication and that she’d lost some blood and- I don’t know, Clarke…”  
  
“Okay, Linc, drive safely, I’ll see you there, thanks for the call.”  
  
She closed the call without waiting his answer and she laid the phone on her legs, trying unsuccessfully to stop her shivering hands. She felt Lexa’s hand on her thigh and turning to her she found a small reassuring smile on her lips.  
  
“We’re almost there.” She pointed. “It will be alright.” She reassured.  
  
Clarke nodded slowly, looking out of the window to watch the other cars pass by near them and she finally closed her eyes, letting the warmth of Lexa’s hand give her some of the courage she needed.  
  
When they finally reached the hospital, Clarke wasn’t surprised of the gazes she and Lexa were dragging from the nurses and the people in the waiting room. They were not exactly dressed for the hospital and the mixture of champagne, glitter and rainbow paint on their skins was dragging everyone’s attention.  
  
About half an hour has passed since the doors of the operating room have closed behind the doctor responsible for Octavia’s delivery and Clarke was about to scream in frustration. Lincoln’s gaze was fixed on the double doors and he didn’t move since the doctor has disappeared behind them. Lexa silently seated at her side, holding her hand sweetly to reassure her.  
  
When the doors finally opened, they all shoot to their feet, but the doctor’s smile immediately calmed their worried hearts.  
  
“She asked for you.” He said to Lincoln. “The baby will be soon taken to the nursery, so you may see her for a few minutes.” He went on, turning to Clarke.  
  
She nodded and hugged Lincoln with all her strength, whispering her congratulations as she tried to hold her tears of joy at the thought that Octavia and the baby were safe. Lincoln followed the doctor and Clarke let go a relieved sigh as Lexa’s hand squeezed her shoulder.  
  
“I told you that everything would be alright, haven't I?” She smiled. “Now put yourself together and go make acquaintance with your new niece.”  
  
Clarke nodded, drying the small tears of joy she didn’t manage to contain. She quickly sprained cold water on her face from the toilet sink, trying with little success to clean off the paint, obtaining only to spread it more on her face. When she got out she found Lincoln waiting for her, an ecstatic smile on his lips and in his eyes.  
  
“My God, Clarke.” He sighed, his eyes shining with tears of joy. “She’s perfect, you have to see her. Octavia is exhausted, but she’s fine and she asked for you. After you’ve seen her, you'll find me in the nursery, cuddling my sweet little Luna.” He said squeezing affectionately one of her shoulders before leaving with long excited steps.  
  
Clarke watched him walking away, her chest warm with happiness. Lexa’s hand grazing gently her arm brought her back to heart.  
  
“Now that we know that everything is fine, I think I better go and let you with your friends and your niece.” She said.  
  
Clarke got lost in the smile of her green eyes. “You don’t have to go…” she started, only to be silenced by a sleek hand raising in front of her.  
  
“Yes, I do. I drove you because it was the fastest and safest way for you to get here, but now that I’ve completed that task I don’t want to intrude.”  
  
Lexa’s heart skipped a beat as she drank her image with her eyes: clothes wrinkled and still wet of champagne, blond messy hairs and smeared make-up and those blue eyes glistening with joy, just like that morning.  
  
She was an indescribable marvel.  
  
“I really hope that last week was as fun and pleasant for you as it was for me.” She muttered, lifting her hand to her lips to leave a little kiss on her skin. “May we meet again.”  
  
Clarke couldn't hold herself, she slowly leaned in to kiss her cheek, her lips brushing the corner of Lexa’s mouth. “Thank you, Lexa.” She whispered, then she turned her back to her and slipped inside Octavia’s room before she had the chance to do anything rash.  
  
“Hey there, gorgeous.” She softly said, looking Octavia’s exhausted face, who gave her the happiest smile Clarke had ever seen on her face.  
  
She rushed to her bed to gently hug her, as her friend hugged her back with the little strength she had left.  
  
“My God, Griffin, you smell like a French bar.” Octavia complained, falling back on her bed and mockingly pushing her shoulder.  
  
Clarke giggled taking her hand as she seated on the chair next to her bed. “Sorry, Lexa thought it would be funny to shower me in champagne.”  
  
“Yeah, I saw it.” Octavia observed, an amused twinkle n her eyes. “It seems the Pride has been lots of fun for you.”  
  
Clarke didn’t answer, she just smiled softly to her, that subject could wait, now she wanted all the details she could have about her beautiful niece. Octavia’s words couldn't stand in front of the reality she was admiring: Luna was one of the most amazing things she had seen her whole life.  
  
She was so small, with dark skin and a tuft of even darker hairs on her small head.  
  
The nurses had dressed her in a pink romper, and she was peacefully sleeping in her crib, unconcerned of Clarke's eyes, shimmering in wonder as she watched her as if she was a miracle. And she really was a miracle to her eyes, a miracle she couldn’t take her eyes off, as she felt her fingers tingle with the urge to paint.  
  
She jumped when her phone buzzed in the rear pocket of her shorts, driving her attention away from Luna’s peaceful face. When she saw the name that appeared on the screen, she bit her bottom lip realizing that she had completely forgotten about Finn.  
  
_“ **Hey, honey, are you back in Washington? You promised me you would send a word when you landed, I hope your flight was fine. I can’t wait to see you.** ” __**  
  
**_ Clarke couldn't hold the sense of guilt that washed over her at that: _I can’t wait to see you._ She hadn't paid him the smallest of thought since the last time she called him back in Amsterdam. After they’d landed, the only person she’d contacted was Octavia, completely forgetting about her boyfriend.  
  
Holding her phone, she started to type a quick answer.  
  
“ ** _Hey, babe, sorry for the delay. Yes, I’m back in Washington I landed a few hours ago and I rushed to the hospital. Octavia had the baby, a beautiful, healthy little girl, I can’t wait for you to meet her!_** ”  
  
She was about to fold her phone back in her pocket to return to her silent contemplation of Luna, when Finn’s name reappeared on the screen.  
  
_“ **Then I guess you accidentally stumbled upon the Gay Pride while you were rushing to the hospital?”**_  
  
As she read those words, she felt her stomach clench and she frantically searched her mind for an answer, but her phone buzzed again.  
  
_“ **And then you gr**_ ** _ound_** _ **on Lexa’s ass to thank her for giving you a lift on her chariot**?”  
_  
Clarke swallowed breathless: she was in deep shit.  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song in the chapter is: Ariana Grande - Into you
> 
> So, what do you think: they will see each other again?


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Chapter settled, sorry again) 
> 
> And finally....

**Capitolo 11**

 

  
Lexa toyed with the pen she was holding in her hand, as she listened to the endless ranting of the person at the other side of her phone, who was listing the advantages the Woods corporation would have from their collaboration. She watched the city through the big window of her office, giving just a few distracted words in answer to all those statements, desperately trying to focus on the conversation. She finally decided to close the call; Lexa asked him to schedule an appointment with her secretary, to have the chance to discuss the details face to face. The light on the earphone she had on, turned off with the ending of the call and Lexa’s unfocused gaze stayed fixed on Washington, lost in the beauty of the city at her feet.  
  
 _She was happy.  
  
_ After a very long time, Lexa had placed her happiness into someone else's hands and even if she was feeling strange in doing so, she couldn’t help it. Clarke was the object of all her thoughts, after just six days without seeing her or hearing from her, she was missing her like she’d never thought possible. Her thoughts were filled of blue eyes and wheat colored hair, of a deep raspy voice and a bright smile that somehow had find the way to melt her ice cold-hearted. If she closed her eyes, she could still feel the way Clarke’d touched her, she could feel her skin’s heat and she could smell her scent.   
  
“Would you like me to leave you alone with the window?”  
  
Anya’s voice shook her off of her thoughts and Lexa turned to the door, a little smile playing around her lips. The lawyer stepped inside her office, a pile of papers in her hands and an eyebrow lifted in her direction. Lexa’s change was all too evident to her, Anya had seen it in her eyes as soon as she was back at work after the week she’d spent with Clarke.   
  
She was glowing.  
  
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen Lexa’s eyes shine like that; the light has started to leave them after her mother’s death, when Costia’s death hit her, the light in Lexa’s eyes went off completely. It was unbelievable how Clarke managed to bring her back to life in only one week.   
  
“Do you need anything?” Lexa asked, moving away from the window. “Shouldn't you be with Raven?”  
  
“I just need a couple of signatures.” Anya answered. “I’ll be with Raven soon enough, her visit it’s in an hour.”   
  
Lexa nodded taking the papers the lawyer was handing to her, she got lost for a few minutes into the words she was reading, before signing at the end of the paper.  
  
“Don’t worry, everything will be okay. It is just a check up, Anya and whatever the doctor is gonna say, you can count on me.”   
  
“I know, thank you, and as you say, it is just a check up, Raven is strong and healthy.”   
  
Even though Anya was always ready to show her cool, Lexa knew all to well how much she really worried for her wife. Since Raven had that accident, which started the trouble with her leg, Anya was always pretty tense when they had to go to the doctor to check Raven’s progresses.  
  
“Are the plans for tonight still on?” Lexa asked, giving the papers back to her.   
  
Anya nodded. “Same place, same time. I just had to make the last arrangements for Raven’s gift.”  
  
“I can do it for you.” When she saw Anya’s mouth open to answer, she quickly added. “You know it’s not a problem for me and I was thinking of leaving early today, a diversion will not be a problem.”  
  
“You leaving early?!” Anya asked lifting an eyebrow “Are you sure you’re alright, Lexa? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you leave the office early in my whole life.”  
  
Lexa smiled with a shrug. “The paperworks are sorted out, the appointments scheduled, my presence is not needed.” She answered. “And I still have to get Raven a gift, I would never show empty handed at her birthday party.”  
  
Anya decided not to answer, she knew Lexa had already told her enough, even in her own vague way. “I’ll see you tonight, try not to be late, Woods.” She warned her, pointing a finger to her as she walked to the door.  
  
“I’m never late, who do you think I am?” Lexa laughed.  
  
Anya rolled her eyes. “I’ll call you after Raven’s check up to let you know if I need help with my present, okay?”  
  
Lexa nodded and watched her as she closed the door behind her. As soon as the lawyer left, she went back to her contemplation of the city, losing herself through the big buildings and the life running fast in the streets.

  
She glanced at her phone, biting her bottom lip as she considered her options, and she finally grabbed it and unlocked the screen.  
  
  
****  
  
Clarke bit her bottom lip, her eyes fixed on the ring in front of her, while the knot that occupied her throat the past couple of days seemed very determined in choking her. She asked herself how a so small object could be so worrisome.  
  
Well, not the ring itself, but the commitment it was implying.  
  
Finn’s text had left her full of regrets and worried of what would happen when they meet, while Lincoln was driving her home, she could only think of what she may say to Finn, how to explain herself to him.  
  
The reaction he gave was completely unexpected and the ring looking at her was the tangible proof of it. Finn had asked her questions, obviously, implying he was worried that something has happened between her and Lexa as he was telling her he had seen the two of them in not so innocent attitude on the chariot. But to her surprise, Finn never got angry, he’d just listened to her and then proposed. Clarke couldn’t find in herself a way to say yes, and she was enough honest with herself to admit that even in a less complicated situation she wouldn’t have wanted to marry Finn anyway. She cared for him, but she’d never spent a single thought on him during the whole week she’d spent with Lexa.  
  
 _Lexa...  
  
_ After six days without seeing her she was missing her more than she should have, she could only think of her, she couldn’t work, she couldn’t concentrate, she couldn't banish her from her thoughts, but she couldn’t call her. She swallowed slowly, toying with the cup of coffee in her hands as she let out a deep sigh, incapable of clearing her thoughts. Her mind was spinning, swallowing her mercilessly, and she was feeling tired.  
  
Her phone buzzed and she turned her head to it, her heart pounded frantically as she lifted it with trembling fingers.  
  
  
****  
  
  
Lexa held the flowers in her hand, looking around and wondering if she was in the wrong place, but she didn’t know another club with that name in the city, so probably the birthday girl and her wife were simply late. She jumped when her phone buzzed in her jeans pocket and she frowned seeing Anya's name as she opened the text.  
  
“Lexa?”   
  
She spinned around at the sound of the voice that was haunting her dreams and her days, pronouncing her name and she drowned in those blue irises. She felt like breathing again, as if she’d held her breath until that moment.  
  
“Clarke...” she whispered, her heart racing. “Wh-what are you doing here?” She finally managed to ask.  
  
“Raven invited me.” Clarke simply answered with a little smile.  
  
It was enough to lift a flock of butterflies that started to flutter wildly in Lexa’s stomach as she realized how much she’d really missed her.   
  
“Didn’t you know ?” She asked confused. “If my presence isn’t-”  
  
“No! Absolutely not.” Lexa stopped her, stepping closer as she shook her head. “I’m happy you’re here, I spent the last few days watching my phone trying not to brake my promise to never bother you again.”  
  
Clarke looked away. Those words were making her position even more complicated, she couldn’t stop thinking about her and knowing that Lexa felt the same way, gave her feelings she shouldn’t have had.  
  
“Is that for Raven?” Lexa asked, changing subject to lift the awkwardness.   
  
“Yeah, but it is just a little present.” She pointed. “I don’t know her very well, but I tried my best.”   
  
Lexa gave her a sweet smile. “I’m sure it’s perf-” she stopped when her phone buzzed in her hands. “Sorry.” She said answering the call. “Okay, yes, two minutes, I’m out here with the flowers.” She nodded. “Jesus, Anya, I’m not deaf, stop shouting!” She snorted as she closed the call and she put the phone back in her pocket, raking a hand in her hair. “The birthday girl and her wife will be here soon, Anya is kinda nervous for her gift.”  
  
“What did she get her?” Clarke asked curious.  
  
Before Lexa could answer she saw Anya and Raven getting off the taxi that just stopped in front of the club.  
  
“You’ll see it in a moment.” She smiled, looking at the couple chatting as they reached them. “Happy birthday, Raven.” Lexa greeted, hugging her.   
  
“Clarke, you came!” Raven smiled untangling from Lexa’s hold to give her a hug.  
  
“Of course, thanks for having me.” Clarke answered. “I have something for you, it is not much, but I hope you like it.” She went on, giving her the wrapped paper she was holding.   
  
Raven unwrapped it quickly, curious to see what it was and she smiled fondly seeing the portrait of herself on Anya’s shoulders in the middle of the Gay Pride parade. The colors were vivid and filled with light and their faces showed all the happiness they were feeling that day… it was simply gorgeous.  
  
“It’s beautiful, Clarke!” She said touched. “You’re really talented, thank you so much.” She went on, hugging her again.  
  
“I wanted to frame it but it would have been impossible to carry it here, if you give me your address I’ll send it to you, so you can hang it.”  
  
“I surely will, I have the perfect spot for it in our living room.”   
  
Clarke smiled, and only then she noticed how Lexa was looking at her and she felt a little heat rising to her cheeks.  
  
“Let’s get inside, shall we? So we can seat while we wait for the others” Anya proposed, handing a big roses bouquet to her wife.   
  
Raven took it with a confused frown. “You never gave me flower.” She noted. “But that time in college when you hid a chocolate b-” she stopped, eyes glistening. “There’s a chocolate bar in here?!”  
  
Anya chucked and put a hand on her back, guiding her to the door, while she was rummaging through the flowers, looking for her chocolate. Her smile widened when she heard her muttering something, just as they stopped in front of the entrance.   
  
“You deceived me.” Raven accused, upset, raising her eyes to look at her. “There’s no chocolate in h-” her words died on her lips when she saw what there was in front of her.  
  
She turned to her wife and she swallowed when her fingers closed on something hard and cold between the flowers: a key. She looked at the car, then at her wife and then at the key, and then back again for several minutes, until she finally managed to stop on Anya.  
  
“But, Anya, wh-” she couldn’t finish her sentence as she let the flowers fall to the ground, forgotten.  
  
Anya folded her hands in the back pockets of her jeans, in that typical unconcerned pose Raven knew all too well as she gave her a shrug as her only answer but followed by a mischievous, bright smile.  
  
Raven looked at the key again, shaking her head. “Is that mine?”  
  
Anya bit her lower lip as she nodded, laughing heartily when Raven threw herself into her arms. Luckily she was ready to hold her, letting her wrap her legs around her hips.   
  
She couldn’t believe that Anya got her for her birthday a 1967 Ford Mustang, she’d been obsessed all her life with that car.  
  
“If we weren’t already married, I would have given you my first born child right here, right now, woman.” Anya laughed hard at that sentence, before Raven kissed her sweetly. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, God, I love you, thank you!” She went on kissing her lips, her nose, her cheeks.   
  
Anya held her tight, putting her hands on her back to keep her close as she enjoyed all those kisses.   
  
“Take me to her! Take me to her!” Raven whined, patting her hands on her shoulders.   
  
Anya didn't let her ask it twice, holding her tight as she stepped to the car. “Raven, meet _your_ Eleanor.” She whispered, placing a sweet kiss on her naked shoulder. “Happy birthday, my love.”   
  
Raven took her face in her hands, closing her mouth with her own in a long, sweet kiss, her hand slipped to her nape as she let out an appreciative moan. Clarke and Lexa stayed a few steps away, silently enjoying the love filled sight, letting the strength of the feeling the two were sharing wash over them.  
  
Lexa finally cleared her throat, to warn them about the people starting to watch them, especially since Anya had laid Raven on the car.   
  
“Maybe we should get in, now?” She asked.  
  
She smiled when Anya reluctantly let go of her wife’s lips, who held her face for a minute longer, giving her another chaste kiss before letting her go.   
  
  
  
Clarke would have never thought about finding herself in that kind of club with Alexandria Woods, well, she’d never even thought she would ever visit Paris. She was surprised to learn that Raven was a karaoke amateur, not as much as seeing Anya looking at her with heart eyes like she’d never seen anything that beautiful her whole life.  
  
She’d watched them dance, laugh, drink and kiss.   
  
She was happy for them, but she couldn’t stop to feel a strange knot in her stomach as she watched them. She’d asked herself, more than once, why she couldn't feel that close to Finn, even though she’d cared for him. And every time she met Lexa’s gaze, that had followed her all the time, she felt that knot tighten up in her stomach.  
  
“So, is someone gonna sing?” One of Raven’s friends asked. “It would be a shame to be here and not give a performance!”  
  
Lexa chuckled shaking her head. “I’m not drunk enough to sing, are you, Reyes?” She poked.   
  
Raven held her gaze over her glass of beer, lifting an eyebrow at her. “I don’t need to be drunk to sing.” She answered. “But my performances are expensive, Woods."  
  
“I’ll buy you another drink.” Lexa proposed. “And a year long supply of cat food.” She added.   
  
“Well, I bet you are.” Anya intervened, wrapping an arm around Raven’s shoulders, and putting her glass on the table. “ _You_ insisted to get her a cat, now _you_ have to provide to it.”  
  
Lexa gave her a dark stare. “Do you even know the meaning of the word _gift_?”   
  
“I’ve never given my approval to have another fleabag around my home, Oliver was more than enough.”  
  
“Come on, he’s so cute!” Raven sighed with glistening eyes as she put down her glass. “It’s a perfect present, Lexa, thank you.”  
  
Lexa raised her glass of wine to her. “For your wedding anniversary I’ll get you a dog.”   
  
“You just try it.” Anya growled, only to be silenced by her wife’s lips.   
  
Clarke watched them amused, sitting more comfortably and letting go, at least for the moment, the thoughts that haunted her for the past week.  
  
Without further words, Raven threw a challenging glance at Lexa, taking her wife’s hand to drag her to her feet as she turned to the stage at the other side of the room. Lexa smiled triumphantly, giving Clarke a wink making her laugh as she shook her head. During the evening she hadn’t interacted much with Lexa, even though she was sitting beside her. She hasn't done it on purpose, but having her close wasn’t helping her mind to be clear and since she already had enough problems she thought it was safer for her that way.   
  
But she was missing her.   
  
She missed talking to her, laughing, and the thrill to lose herself in her intelligence and in her presence. She swallowed, fixing her eyes on the stage and thanking whoever was listening when she saw Anya and Raven ready for their song.   
  
“Let’s give a warm welcome to Raven and Anya!” The owner shouted, clapping his hands, immediately followed by the patrons.  
  
Raven cleared her throat, driving the attention on herself as she let loose her ponytail, letting her hair fall on her naked shoulder. The strong lights were enhancing even more the warm colors of their skins. They both held a microphone, as the music started followed by many appreciative whistles: after all, that was one of the most popular American songs.   
  
Clarke hid a laugh behind her hand as Lexa tried very hard not to laugh herself.   
  
“ _ **I was feeling done in..**_.” Raven started, with an innocent expression that was so not fitting on her face. “ _ **Couldn't win. I'd only ever kissed befo-o-ore.**_ ”  
  
Clarke, as if she’d forgotten her aim, got closer to Lexa, saying to her with enough high voice to be heard from everyone else. “ _ **You mean she...?**_ ”  
  
Lexa looked surprised as she pronounced her. “ _ **Uh-huh.**_ ” Surrounded by the laugh of the crowd.  
  
Raven tormented the microphone, looking at the floor and throwing fake uncertain glances to Anya. “ _ **I thought there's no use getting into heavy petting.**_ ”  
Anya lifted an eyebrow at her. “ _ **It only leads to trouble and seat-wetting.**_ ” Raven closed as the music sped up.  
  
Then she stopped to play innocent and she stepped to Anya, hips swinging as she laughed shaking her head.  
  
“ _ **Now all I want to know is how to go...”**_ Raven sang. “ _ **I've tasted blood and I want more.**_ ”  
  
“ _ **More, more, more!**_ ” Clarke shouted from their table, dragging Lexa with her in the choir that belonged to Magenta and Columbia.  
  
Anya’s fingers gripped her microphone and she sang the next line as she took Raven’s hand, dragging her to her body.  
  
“ _ **I'll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance...**_ ”  
  
Clarke threw a surprised glance to Lexa, she had no idea Anya could sing that good, but that woman seemed to hide the most unpredictable surprises and Lexa gave her back a knowing glance as she smiled shrugging.  
  
“ _ **I've got an itch to scra-a-tch, I need assistance!**_ ”  
  
As if they’ve rehearsed for weeks, Raven spun in Anya’s hold, pressing her back on her chest and driving her hand to the skin on her belly that the top she was wearing didn’t cover.   
  
“ _ **Touch-a, touch-a, touch-a touch me. I wanna be di-i-rty. Thrill me, chill me, fulfil me. Creature of the night.**_ ”  
  
Lexa laughed hard at the way her best friends seemed to have completely forgotten about the people watching, as Raven guided Anya’s hand everywhere under her top.   
  
“Why am I not surprised that they chose the dirtiest song in the whole selection?” She muttered.   
  
She got an amused glance by Clarke who just shrugged at the rhythm of the song. On the stage Anya and Raven were no more tangled around each other and now they were singing a line each as they walked in a circle, staring at each other eyes.   
  
“ _ **Then if anything grows while you pose, I'll oil you up and rub you down.**_ ”  
  
Clarke nudged Lexa’s shoulder, but she found her ready this time. “ _ **Down, down, down.**_ ” They sang together, bursting out laughing right after as they looked back at the stage.   
  
“ _ **And that's just one small fraction of the main attraction, you need a friendly hand and I need action.**_ ” Anya sang.  
  
At the chorus, Raven got closer to her wife again, letting her sing and just whispering: “ _ **I wanna be dirty.**_ ” On her lips, as she let her hands slip on her shoulder to free her from her leather jacket.   
  
Anya just shrugged it off as she was singing, throwing it on Lexa’s face as she was singing the chorus with Clarke, with the same enthusiasm if not with the equal volume. The crowd exploded at the sight of the woman’s lean body, that Raven started to trace with the tip of her fingers. Lexa put her fingers in her mouth, whistling when Raven lifted Anya’s white tank top, showing her wife’s abs to the public.  
  
A choir of _**“Creature of the night”**_ started from different tables, but at that point neither Raven nor Anya were anymore paying attention to the song. The microphones forgotten, the two kept dancing as the song ended, eyes glued to each other, lips closed and laughs in their throats. They snapped out of their trance right at the end of the song, when Anya grabbed Raven’s thigh, holding her in a perfect casquette, her hands gripping her shoulder.  
  
“Well...” Lexa pointed as she was cheering with the crowd. “I’m surprised they managed to stay fully clothed, this time.”  
  
  
After Anya and Raven’s performance, the rest of the night went by chatting and drinking, Clarke had kept her attention on Raven’s friends in a vague attempt to stay as far away as she could from Lexa. Clarke’d always liked that kind of light-hearted evenings, with Finn they’d become fewer and fewer. She sighed silently at the thought and she raked a hand through her hair, watching the person who was now singing on the stage.  
  
She got lost in the song a muscled guy was singing, reminding the happy times she had when she sat with her parents in their big garden to sing all together. Jake used to play the guitar – that Clarke always wanted to learn how to play – and while Abby was roasting marshmallows, she sang with her dad. She had spent the whole evening to fight the urge to get on that stage and to sing, trying, after all those years of hiding from her demons of her past, a contact with the most important man in her life. She took a sip of her drink and looked at the boy who was singing his love to his girlfriend and she smiled slightly.  
  
Finn was a great guy, but he had never made such sensational acts for her, Lexa on the other hand...  
  
She shook her head and slammed with too much impetuosity the glass on the table, trying to stop those thoughts, because it was foolish to keep comparing the two of them in that way. Clarke drew upon herself a couple of looks and before she could receive any type of question, she stood up and walked away.

  
  
Lexa want back to the table a few minutes later and frowned noticing Clarke's absence, she took a seat and looked around trying to figure out where the girl might have gone, without success. She was pleasantly surprised when she saw the owner of the place on stage, followed by the girl who never left her thoughts.  
  
“We are all here to welcome Clarke!” he said into the microphone. “The girl is a little tense, let's make her feel that she has nothing to be afraid of!”  
  
As soon as the man finished saying those words, people applauded before the music began to play  
  
“I want to dedicate this song to a person who has a special place in my heart, which, unfortunately, is no longer with me.” she said with a sad little smile.  
  
Clarke took a deep breath and pointed her eyes on the audience, looking immediately for Lexa in the crowd. “ _ **I could stay awake just to hear you breathing, watch you smile while you are sleeping, while you're far away and dreaming.”  
  
**_ Clarke's voice was strong and sure, while her eyes were pointed on the table where Lexa was staring at her curiously.   
  
“ _ **I could spend my life in this sweet surrender, I could stay lost in this moment forever, every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure.”  
  
**_ Clarke's heart began to beat wildly and in her mind appeared her father's beautiful and smiling face.  
  
“ _ **Don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep, 'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing. 'Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do, I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing.”  
  
**_ Her mind was invaded with memories, one after another, full of a happy life but in the same time so far away. She gripped the microphone and took a shaky breath, seeing her father's eyes of bright and full of love.  
  
“ _ **Lying close to you feeling your heart beating and I'm wondering what you're dreaming, wondering if it's me you're seeing.”  
  
**_ She remembered the times when she had woken up as a child, in the middle of the night, with her father sitting in the rocking chair beneath her window, asleep, lovingly watching over her sleep.  
  
“ _ **Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together, I just want to stay with you in this moment forever, forever and ever.”  
  
**_ Her mind was filled with the Sundays summer in the pool, the nights spent watching the stars in the tree house that they had built together, the evenings to stroll through the streets on his shoulders.  
  
“ _ **Don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep 'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing**_.” She sang in a lower voice, almost cracked with tears. “ _ **'Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing.”  
  
**_ Clarke pointed her gaze on Lexa and saw the girl's eyes digging right into her soul and when she sang the next verse, Clarke was not sure for who she was singing: To the only man who had been important in her life or Lexa.  
  
 _ **“I don't want to miss one smile, I don't want to miss one kiss, I just want to be with you, right here with you, just like this**_.” Clarke put her hand to her heart and looked at Lexa with intensity, her eyes misty with tears. “ _ **I just want to hold you close, feel your heart so close to mine and just stay here in this moment for all the rest of time.”  
  
**_ Her heart was so full of feelings and sensations that she was not able to handle it anymore, so Clarke found herself groping for air and she left the microphone and quickly got off the stage.  
  
When she went out, Clarke leaned against the wall and she took a long, deep breath, trying to control her pulse and she tried to control the tears that seemed intent to fall. She should have realized that the evening would have turned out that way at the exact moment she saw Lexa, especially given the way she had done nothing but think about her all the time.  
  
And since the memories of her father that the song had triggered, she was surprised that she was not having a panic attack at that moment. She breathed strongly, deeply and wiped away the tears that had fallen on her face, happy not to have put make up on that night, otherwise she would have looked like a sad panda. She realized that tears were not only for the song but it was a way to give vent to the tension of those long days. She cupped her face and decided that if the cry had help her feeling better, then she would not have fought.  
  
  
Lexa looked at the door with apprehension, Clarke was out for about ten minutes and she was about to abandon her plans to leave the girl alone and follow her, just to make sure she was all right or she had taken a taxi to go home safely. She was about to leave the bar counter when Raven appeared at her side, obscuring the view of the door and seconds later Anya joined in, ordering a drink for both.  
  
“Are you sure you’re able to go home with Eleanor after all that you have been drinking?” Lexa asked curiously. “Otherwise I volunteer to take her home and you can take a taxi back."  
  
“Keep your dirty hands off my new car, Lexa.” Raven said without beating around. “Eleanor is the new love of my life."  
  
“I never had any doubts about it.” said Anya amused. “If it were not that big, probably she would take my place in our bed.”  
  
“Raven can always sleep with Eleanor in the garage.” Lexa suggested taking a sip of wine.  
  
Raven nodded with conviction. “It's not a bad idea!” she agreed and leaned to kiss Anya when she heard her snorting loudly. “Don't be grumpy, you will not feel alone, you'll have Oliver and the new member of the family to keep you company.”  
  
Anya raised her head. “That little lot of fleas will not be allowed to approach the bed before going to the vet.” she pointed out, then she turned to Lexa with a raised eyebrow. “I'm still deeply disturbed by your choice, when you said today that you would not come to the party without a gift, I never imagined that you'd knock on the door with _that."  
  
_ Lexa shrugged and gave her an amused smile: when she had chosen the kitten from the shop, she had done it a little because she knew very well how much Raven loved those animals and a little bit to annoy Anya.  
  
"I want a supply of dry food for life." Anya continued drinking a long sip of her beer.  
  
Raven put her arm around her waist and held her tightly, resting her head on her shoulder. “Come on, An, get it over with” she said amused. “Given the cost of the operation and the brace, Lexa should not even be allowed to get me birthday presents for at least the next thirty years.”  
  
Lexa smiled and shook her head, putting a hand on her shoulder and squeezing . “Don't be silly, Raven.” she warned. “I would not have taken no for an answer, I would never have allowed a simple doctor to put his hands on your leg and Dr. Thomson is the best in his field.” she explained again. “And you are my family and it is the only thing that matters.”  
  
Raven reached out to hug her with transport, Lexa put both hands on her back, lulling Raven in her arms and she saw Clarke staring at them from a short distance. Lexa saw, in addition of Clarke's red puffy eye, the sparkle that she had seen one week before at pride day. Lexa gave her a small smile, not quite sure how Clarke would take that and she found herself almost sigh of relief when the girl returned the smile before walking away.  
  
When Raven released her and planted a gentle kiss on the cheek, Lexa followed Clarke with her eyes and she watched her take refuge in the bathroom, wondering again if Clarke was avoiding her. She had hardly said a word all evening, except when it was absolutely necessary and Lexa felt a big void in her heart at the thought that Clarke did not want to have anything to do with her. She decided to take control of the situation, she planted a kiss on Raven's cheek and after finishing her wine in one swallow, she said goodbye to them and went in search of the girl.  
  
  
Clarke sighed heavily, shaking hands in her lap, and she closed her eyes, trying to stop the swirling of thoughts that did not seem to want to leave. Saying yes to Raven's invitation was not a good idea, she thought and having spent time again with Lexa had made things even more difficult.  
  
In one week Clarke had discovered a totally different woman from what she had imagined. She had discovered a loving Lexa, funny and generous... God, _so_ generous. Lexa had proved to be a wonderful person, a person that everyone could easily fall in love with and not only for her status but for her intelligence, for the way she was and the way she was able to make people feel special. The truth of what she felt for Lexa had hit her strongly, such as a speeding train, especially when she heard the wonderful gesture she had made for Raven. Paying for her operation, making sure that a good doctor would take care of her and her brace...  
  
Clarke brought her hands to the face and sighed heavily, trying to escape from all the love she felt in her body and her heart, and for some strange reasons she felt her eyes become moist again, as if her heart could not hold all that feeling... she jumped when the couch where she was sat moved and she turned, swallowed by Lexa’s eyes, who was sitting beside her. Without a word Lexa handed her a bottle of beer and then pointed her gaze to the dance floor that was visible from that position.  
  
Clarke took a sip and enjoyed the silence, comforted by the warmth of Lexa’s body that she could feel a few steps from her and she found herself looking at her profile biting her lower lip.  
  
“It was for my father.” she said in a small voice. Lexa turned to face her with her head tilted to the side but she stayed silent. “The song was for my father.” she explained. “He sang to me all the time when I was a kid, we used to go in the backyard, he would pull out his guitar and he would sing.”  
  
“And is it not like this anymore?” she asked softly.  
  
Clarke swallowed and shook her head. “He died when I was sixteen.” she whispered. “A car accident, a drunk driver did not respect the stop sign and hit his car. There was nothing to do.”  
  
Lexa leaned to take her hand and squeezed it. “I'm so sorry, Clarke.”  
  
“We had a fight that morning, he did not like the guy I was dating and he did not give me the permission to go with him and his friends on vacation.” she went on in a broken voice. “I shouted in his face that I hated him and a few hours later he was dead.” she put her hands to her face. “He died thinking it was the truth.”  
  
“Clarke, no.” Lexa said quickly slipping closer, she gently removed her hands from her face. “Teenagers always say this kind of things but he knew how much you loved him, I'm sure.” she cupped her face and stroked her cheek.  
  
“It's all my fault, Lexa.” she murmured staring at her intently. “My father was a calm and controlled person, he had an accident because we had a fight and after his death everything fell apart.” she continued, closing her eyes and letting a tear roll down on her cheek. “My mother began to drink, began to neglect me and her work. I saw my life falling apart in a few months.”  
  
Lexa listened carefully, feeling so close to Clarke: although they came from different family situations, they were united by the pain of losing someone they loved more than their own life.  
  
“After graduation, I ran away from home.” she confessed. “I packed my bags, I took a few things with me and I literally ran away. I haven’t seen my mother for six years and sometimes I feel so alone and lost.”  
  
Lexa wiped the tear away with her thumb, caressing her face. “You're not alone.” she said in a whisper. “For what it's worth, I'm here for you, Clarke, I will never leave you alone.”  
  
Clarke felt something inside her going to pieces, the little fortress which had always held her heart crumbled in one instant. She let Lexa's eyes tie her, she let Lexa’s green irises feed her and she felt attracted by her full lips. She felt Lexa's hand continue to caress her with reverence and she decided to not fight anymore. Clarke leaned forward slightly and she felt Lexa's body tense up for a second, but when her lips rested on Lexa’s, in a gentle caress, she heard her sigh of surrender.  
  
It was only a gentle touch, like the beating of a butterfly but Clarke was able to clearly taste the flavor of those lips. The lips she had wanted to taste from the moment she had seen Lexa at the diner six year before. That thought made her shiver and when Lexa’s hand went through her hair, on her neck, with the intention to deepen the kiss, Clarke pulled away as if she had been burned.  
  
“I c-can't.” she said with the heart beating wildly. “I ca-can't, I'm so-sorry, Lexa” she stood up and put as much space as possible between them.  
  
“It's okay, I understand.” Lexa assured her but when she saw the panic on Clarke's face, she stood up ready to reassure her; she was surprised when Clarke stepped away again, frightened by her presence. “Clarke, it's okay.” she repeated.  
  
“I'm sorry.” Clarke said again. “I-I have to go, excuse me.”  
  
Lexa did not stop her, she just slumped back on the sofa and sighed.  
  
Clarke made her way through the crowd of people. She needed to find Anya before leaving, she needed to talk to her. She saw her on one of the sofas, squeezed between Raven's arms, rubbing her leg with love.  
  
“Can I talk to you for a moment?” she asked with frantic voice, glancing over her shoulder, strongly hoping that Lexa had not followed her.  
  
Anya tilted her head to one side. “Sure.” but she did not stood up.  
  
Clarke took a deep breath, clenched her fists and tried to calm herself. “I need to talk about the divorce.” she said.  
  
At these words the lawyer straightened, giving her full attention. “What about?”  
  
“I know you have not given the papers to Lexa yet.”she said. “And I want you to wait, I want to talk to her, I want to tell her the truth.”  
  
Anya raised an eyebrow. “What made change your mind?”  
  
There was a long moment of silence.  
  
“Her.” Clarke answered simply. “She has the right to know the truth and I want to be the one to tell her about it.”

  
****  
  
Raven sank into the mattress, her eyes turned towards the woman in front of her, she was still standing in front of the bed. The city lights lit up the room from the huge windows that looked out of Washington DC. She tilted her head, leaning back on her elbows, kicking off her shoes and waving her feet fingers playfully, making Anya grin as she knelt before her.  
  
The slender fingers of her wife went up the leg slowly in a light caress, until reaching the brace Raven was wearing over the jeans. With expert gestures of who had done that a millions of times before, Anya worked patiently to unhook and release the brace, before carefully slide it down, removing it permanently. Raven let out a tired sigh of relief when her leg fell half numb on the mattress.  
  
But Anya did not move right away, she pressed her forehead against Raven's knees and stayed there, while her wife slid her fingers through her long blonde hair. With a sigh, Anya stood up and helped her wife to slip away the jeans, throwing them at the feet of the bed without too many thoughts. She walked over to close the curtains and took off her shoes, before returning to crawl on the bed. Raven grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her, still dressed, on top of her before, burying her nose in the crook of her neck and she breathed deeply her scent. Together, they crawled closer to each other, until their faces were only a few millimeters away from one another.  
  
Anya rubbed the tip of her nose against Raven's, enjoying the silence and the company of the only person who had been able to make her feel complete. Raven smiled, sweet but also tired, running her fingertips on Anya's chest, going back on her throat and stopping there. Cradled by their breath and by the presence of the other, they continued looking at each other, taking those few moments for them. The moments when they were not in trouble by a bad leg or obsessed by the latest deal to be concluded or disagree for the umpteenth bullshit.  
  
Moments when nothing important was anything outside those four walls, if not the two of them.  
  
Moments when simply breathing the scent of the other and the presence of the other had the ability to soothe any tiredness and problems.  
  
Anya shrugged and enjoyed with exhaustion, getting up on her elbows.  
  
“Anya.” Raven murmured, in the weary tone of someone who knew he was fighting a losing battle.  
  
“Shut your mouth.” she replied, quickly undressing before returning to kneel near the legs of her wife.  
  
Surrendering, Raven lifted the damaged leg until the thigh was resting on Anya's.  
  
Immediately, expertly and studied, Anya began to massage the sore muscles of her leg, sliding the fingers in the points and in the important nerve to maintain active the circulation. She had learned the procedure years before, along with Raven and her physical therapist, immediately after the operation. She had learned because she had made a promise to Raven when she agreed to marry her and that included the promise to take care of her for the rest of her life.  
  
And never, in the years that they were together, Anya had broken that promise.  
  
And never, in the years that they were together, Raven had gone to bed without her wife taking care of her leg.  
  
Stubbornly, sometimes, Anya had insisted on massaging even though it had just come back from a tiring day. They had little fights but Anya had never broken that promise and Raven also loved her for it. She loved her because Anya took care of her without making her feel less of a woman and she was able to take care of her without soothe her independence. Raven smiled tiredly when Anya finished her massage and again she leaned over to grab her wife, dragging her to the bed. They would not make love that night and they both knew. They didn't need it, everything was perfect like this.   
  
“Thank you.” Raven murmured, fingers laced in her neck.  
  
“It's just a stupid car.” Anya muttered in response, making Raven laugh and she smiled, because they both knew that the “thank you” was not only for the car.  
  
“Rea?” Anya muttered, after a while, legs plait together with the other.  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
Anya smiled hearing her wearily voice. “I love you.”  
  
Raven gave her a happy and very, very tired look. “Of course you love me, I'm amazing.”  
  
Anya shook her head and chuckled before bending over to kiss her on the lips, because yes, Raven, was amazing.  
  
They settled better, arguing like every night, about who should be the small spoon and who the big one. Anya won and she smiled as she wrapped her arm around Raven's waist. They knew that the next morning they would find themselves hugging each other on the edge of the bed, in the opposite position.  
  
But it was just perfect that way.  
  
  
****  
  
Lexa walked down the hall with a measured pace, waving to the people she met on her way with a nod and a bright smile. Anya had not arrived yet in the office but considering how late they had returned the night before, Lexa was not surprised or annoyed. But her appointment, however, was there and she needed the documents she had given to Anya a few days before to check for conclude the deal.

  
She was heading to Anya’s office just to take them, she knew that the lawyer would not have cared if she had not waited for her. Lexa had sent a message to warn her and Anya had told her where to find them. She made her way into the office, reaching the desk and taking a look on the sheaf of papers on the edge. It took a few minutes to find what she was looking for and just when she was about to go back, with one eye, she saw something that caught her attention.  
  
In the middle of papers that were scattered on the desk, there was a folder hidden with above a caption that made her frowning: _**Griffin- Woods.  
  
**_ She tensed imperceptibly, wondering why her lawyer, her closest friend, had in the middle of her papers a folder with her name and Clarke's wrote above  
  
Alexandria Woods had always had very clear ideas about her life. At least until that moment.  
  
She gripped tightly that piece of paper, her hands shaking, while a node in her throat almost prevented her from breathing. She rested her palm on the cold wood of the desk and tried to control the emotions that began to move inside of her, squeezing her chest in an almost painful grip, she even felt her heart skip a few beats.  
  
“Lexa?”  
  
Anya's voice brought her back to reality and she forced herself to swallow the stone in her chest and she blinked.  
  
“Did you find what you were looking for?” Anya asked as she made her way into the room.  
  
When she saw that Lexa did not seem willing to answer her, she frowned, resting the folder on the desk to get her attention.  
  
“Are you sure you're okay?”  
  
When Lexa looked up at her, Anya froze seeing the anger that inflamed he green eyes, making them almost black.  
  
“What is this?”   
  
Lexa with her calm and terribly cold voice was the only thing that nicked silence.  
  
And Anya understood.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anya and Raven's song is Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me from the amazing Rocky Horror Picture Show  
> Clarke's song is I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith
> 
> If you want to see Raven's new car (from the movie: Gone in 60 Seconds): http://static.allaguida.it/allaguida/fotogallery/1200X0/73911/mustang-shelby-gt500-eleanor-laterale.jpg


	13. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me recall that my native language is Italian, so sorry for any grammar mistakes.   
> I have a beta but often we do not see all the mistakes, sorry.

**Chapter 12**

 

 

Finn's eyes burned into hers, intense and slightly accusers.  
  
After literally running away from Raven's party the previous night, she did not hesitate for a second to send a text to the boy asking him to meet up the next morning. Things between them were clearly tense but they haven't talked about the consequences of her rejection to his marriage proposal.  
  
When Clarke had seen him, she knew she needed to tell him the truth, it was something that both deserved. It was not right for their relationship and for what they had tried to build.  
  
The boy stared at her, his jaw tense and his irises were a mixture of disappointment and regret. Clarke lowered her face, unable to support Finn's gaze. She knew that she had done nothing wrong: besides the almost kiss with Lexa the previous night, she never cheated on him. Yes, some of her behaviors were open to misinterpretation but she never crossed the line that would make her appear a cheater and when the situation was almost out of her hand, she always pulled back. This helped her to understand that it was time to fix things.  
  
“Is it for her?” Finn finally asked with a small voice.  
  
Clarke swallowed and shook her head. “I can't marry you, Finn, I explained to you why.” she said softly. “And I'm sorry I didn't tell you but I was this person’s wife only on paper and I have already submitted the divorce papers.”  
  
“Then why, Clarke?” he asked, rising to his feet. “If you sent the divorce papers, Clarke, why can't you marry me? Or it is better to say, you do not want to.”   
  
“Finn, please, don't make things harder.” she muttered with a lump in her throat. “I have feelings for you, strong feelings, but I can't marry you. It would not be right for either of us.”  
  
Finn gripped his jaw tightly and Clarke could clearly see his eyes become moist for a second and the guilt caught her immediately. She did not want to hurt him, she did not want to hurt anyone but she was aware that that situation would put a strain on everyone.  
  
“I love you, Clarke.” he murmured with a weak voice.  
  
“I love you too, Finn.” she said. “But I can't marry you.”  
  
There was a long moment of silence, Clarke pointed her eyes on the work table, getting lost in the colors smeared on the palette and she could hear the guy approach her. She felt Finn's hand stroke her cheek with love and Clarke stared at him intently, losing herself in his dark eyes.  
  
“I'll miss you.” he whispered.  
  
“You too.” she said. “But there is no need to end this, we were friends once.”  
  
Finn smiled sadly. “Your heart belongs to someone else.” he said. “I don't know if I'll ever be able to live with this awareness.” he leaned over to kiss her softly. “I wish you the best, Clarke, be happy for both of us.”  
  
And just as he had approached, he let go of her face and stepped back. They looked at each other for a long moment, then, with a sad smile, Finn turned toward the exit. Clarke stared at him until he reached the door and when the boy opened it, she had to clench her eyes tightly to stop the trembling of her heart.  
  
The door closed and the noise echoed through the silence of the art gallery, making her stomach turn. Behind closed eyelids, Clarke could almost see her paintings retreat for the noise that suddenly came to disturb the peace. She ran her hands over her face, trying to banish the weary sadness that was hunching her lips into a bitter grimace.  
  
She did not want to cry but she was tired, so tired.  
  
She sighed heavily, massaging for a brief instant the tense muscles of her neck and shoulders, before returning to focus her attention on the colors beside her. She did not want to cry and the best way to avoid that was direct her feelings into her art. The break up with Finn had gone better than she had expected but this did not prevent her to feel a pain in her heart at the thought of what she had let go. She no longer loved Finn but the awareness of hurting him made her feel die inside.  
  
She picked up the palette, pointing a determined look on the canvas, trying to ignore the jolt of her heart at the sight of the extended of green that she already ruled over all the other colors. She dipped the brush into the paint but before she could put it on the canvas, a familiar and unexpected voice made her jump.  
  
“I hope it was worth it.”  
  
Clarke, surprised to find herself sinking into two eyes of the same green that occupied her canvas, spun around much closer than she expected. Those eyes were invaded by a dark shade that she’s never ever seen before.   
  
“Lexa, you've ...”  
  
“I suppose you had fun last week.” Lexa interrupted hard, her voice low and trembling.  
  
Clarke's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she took a step backward, “Lexa, what are you -”   
  
Lexa shot forward, Clarke felt the palette slipping through her fingers and impacting on the floor, while splashes of color were everywhere around their ankles. She tried to go back again but she found her way barred by the work desk, on which she rested her trembling hands for support.   
  
She was trapped.  
  
Instinctively she raised a hand, placing it at the center of Lexa's chest and blocking her from going ahead, forcing her to take a small step back. She needed space, air. She needed to get away from those green irises that seemed to want to dig into her soul in search of any answer.  
  
And suddenly the awareness of what was their silent question hit her with the force of a moving train.  
  
It was not possible, she told Anya to wait and the woman had assured that she would not give Lexa the divorce papers before they talked. But as she tried hard to convince herself that it was impossible, the truth was clear in front of her eyes: Lexa knew. She could see it clearly in those eyes dilated by anger and disappointment, that seemed to suck all the light that usually lit up those green eyes, cutting off the breath in her throat. Clarke turned around trying to escape, incapable of supporting that accusing look, her stomach was tight in a vice and she tried to stop the trembling of her voice, taking a deep breath.  
  
“I can explain it, I-”   
  
Before she could continue, she felt Lexa's chest slam into her back, pushing her against the table, while her hands were trapped on both sides of her body.  
  
She could not suppress a gasp of surprise.  
  
“Lexa ...” she exhaled, but a hand grabbed her face, with arrogance, forcing her to turn around so she could meet again those burning eyes.  
  
“You may kiss the bride.” Lexa growled on her lips. _“Mary.”  
  
_ She opened her eyes and she gasped and then Lexa pressed her hot mouth on Clarke's, stopping her breath. At first she did not move, too surprised by what was happening: that touch was totally different from the kiss they had shared the night before.  
  
It was arrogant and pretentious.  
  
“Kiss me.” Lexa demanded pushing her harder against the table.  
  
At that husky command Clarke could not help but gasp on Lexa's lips and this allowed her to slid her tongue inside Clarke's mouth to meet hers and after that there were fireworks. Clarke put her open palms against the table to stand up, she saw that her legs did not seem willing to hold her for long and Lexa touched her tongue with arrogance, tasting it and leaving Clarke completely breathless.  
  
Her eyes widened when one of Lexa's hands closed hard on her right breast, squeezing it, while the left hand was going to look for the suspenders of her oversized salopette and quickly unfastening them, leaving the fabric from falling on her hips.  
  
Always with demanding lips on hers, Lexa grabbed the cloths between her fingers and pulled it down, along Clarke's thighs, making her shiver when the cold air hit her hot skin. Finally she freed her from that kiss and Clarke hoped to catch her breath, to say something but Lexa pulled to the side the fabric of her underwear and her fingers came in contact with her naked sex.  
  
“Lexa!” she groaned, a mixture of surprise and lust.  
  
But Lexa ran her fingertips on her wet sex pushing her against the table, so that Clarke found herself pressed against the wood. When Lexa's lips closed on her neck, sucking hard, Clarke leaned her forehead on the table: her fingers did not give her time for breath. Lexa moved her mouth on her skin, heading towards the ear and she licked the outline with sensuality.  
  
“Tell me you want me.” she claimed in a husky voice.  
  
Clarke gasped, closing her eyes tightly and biting her lips to the wave of wet desire that released between her legs.  
  
“Tell me!" Lexa ordered biting the delicate skin behind her ear.  
  
“I want you!” Clarke gasped against the cold wood of the table, moaning loud at the feeling of Lexa's fingers on her clit.  
  
“I can't hear you.” Lexa growled biting the skin of her shoulders and spine.  
  
“I want you, _you know I want you_.” Clarke repeated brokenly. “Shit!” she groaned, feeling  Lexa’s fingers slide up and down of her slick folds.  
  
Lexa's tongue went up her spine, while her finger slipped into her, Clarke's hip  instinctively snapped back, looking for more contact but Lexa's free hand tightened around her hip, stopping her movements.   
  
“Please ...” she gasped, biting her lower lip, Lexa's warm breath in her ear made her shiver.  
  
“Please what?” Lexa murmured, moving her tongue in her ear and ripping a loud groan from the girl.  
  
“Please, Lexa... touch me.” she replied in a desperate gasp, her throat incapable of producing more complex sounds.  
  
She had wanted Lexa's touch for so long and despite the fact that Lexa had caught her off guard, she had always imagined how it would have been like to be touched by Lexa in the past six years, she had dreamed about it many times, a lot more than she was supposed to. She felt Lexa's lips curl into a smile, pulling her finger away from her sex and before Clarke could protest, two fingers pushed deeply against her slick folds. Clarke could not control the sudden cry that escaped from her lips and she gasped when Lexa began to move fast, repeatedly hitting the sensitive spot inside of her.  
  
Her muscles tightened hard and Lexa's fingers stopped instantly, making Clarke gasp desperately, she slammed her forehead against the table and moved her hips back silently inviting Lexa to keep going.   
  
“I want you to say my name.” Lexa said directly into her ear. “Say my name.” she commanded as she started pushing again.  
  
Clarke just needed a couple more thrusts and her muscles were tightened with such force on Lexa's fingers, it was hard for her to keep pushing but when her free hand reached to brush Clarke's clit for the girl it was the end.  
  
“Lexa!” she cried, her back arched and her eyes closed.  
  
When the pleasure went diminishing, she sagged back on the table and then Lexa’s body followed her, her mouth shut on her neck. Clarke closed her eyes trying to catch her breath, but when she felt Lexa's fingers retreat she could not help letting out a disappointed gasp, clearly still not entirely satisfied. Lexa's mouth slid down her back, her nails scratching on the sensitive skin of Clarke's hips before forcing the girl to turn around. As soon as she saw her blue eyes, Lexa's mouth closed on her, while her hands gripped her ass, lifting Clarke off the ground as her tongue was looking for Clarke's.  
  
Clarke wrapped her legs around her, letting Lexa raise her on the table, while her own hands instinctively grabbed the edges of Lexa's dark shirt, pulling until all the buttons went flying around in the room. Lexa's teeth tightened painfully on her lower lip, like she was trying to punish her for that gesture, forcing Clarke to break the kiss. Clarke was surprised to see in front of her Lexa's skin, where no bra bandaged her perfect breast.  
  
Lexa bit her lower lip under her inspection and her gaze full of desire drifted on Clarke's thighs. Her eyes rested on the evident wetness she could see on her underwear and without further thoughts, Lexa put her fingers into the rubber band and with a gesture she ripped it apart.   
  
Clarke groaned and slipped her hands in her hair, drawing Lexa mouth on her breast; it took only a moment for Lexa to understand the suggestion, her hands frantically ran to get rid of the bra, allowing her to close her mouth on Clarke’s nipple. Clarke moaned, pushing her hips against her, seeking relief at the insistent desire that those attentions were once again awakening.  
  
Lexa did not make her wait long, with an almost desperate gesture she freed the table of every thing, regardless of the colors that fell on the floor. Lexa laid her on the table, taking her knees and placing her leg on her shoulder.  
  
Clarke was stunned by that frenzy but she had no time to say a single word because Lexa slid into her again, cutting off her breath. Clarke stared at her with wide eyes, completely incredulous, and she found herself lost in her eyes. In that moment Clarke knew that Lexa was trying to tell her something with her eyes, hoping she would understand and when she raised a hand to caress Lexa's cheek, Lexa closed her eyes and bit her lower lip, like she was trying to keep herself together.  
  
Then Lexa began to move slowly inside her, before bending forward to close her mouth again on one of Clarke’s nipples, hiding from her searching gaze. The combination of lips on her breasts, fingers moving with increasing speed, her bare chest against Lexa's and her hot breath on her skin, made Clarke feel herself already close to the edge. The only thing that kept her from feeling with how much passion Lexa was taking her was the fact she was soaked as she hasn't ever been before and, despite the rush, she could not stop feeling discharges of pleasure invade her whole body.  
  
Clarke wasn't able to hold back the moans for long, every time Lexa sank into her and her fingertips caressed the right point, Clarke's hips rose up. When Lexa's mouth let go her nipple, only to bite the side of her breast with just enough pressure to leave a mark, Clarke felt she had no way out from that passion. Despite her working table had never been present in her fantasies, in all those years, Clarke had dreamed of having sex with Lexa over and over again. The reality was far better than her fantasies.   
  
And as soon as the rhythmic sound of Lexa's fingers inside of her began to affect the silence of the study, mingling with her moans, Clarke started to feel again close to the edge and her stomach tightened with pleasure.   
  
“Come for me.” she ordered her, tracing with the tongue her breasts, stopping on her mouth, where she dedicated the same attention. “Come again for me.” she repeated with a particularly strong push.  
  
At that command her inner muscles twitched and sucked Lexa's fingers in an almost painful grip, while the pleasure exploded making her back arch. Lexa's name escaped from her lips in a prayer, as her body tensed and her nails scratched Lexa's back. Lexa fingers inside her guided her through the orgasm, as her mouth kept on reality, covering with kisses, sucking and biting every bit of skin she could reach. Her body relaxed abandoning herself boneless on the hard surface of the table, but Lexa still did not seem satisfied.  
  
“Lexa...” she moaned exhausted, when she didn't stop and her full lips kept their sweet torture on her skin.  
  
Lexa’s hips moved, just an inch, in answer to her plea, getting a better position on her and she started to follow the rhythm of the hard thrusts of her fingers, getting them to depths that Clarke was sure, until then, they had stayed unexplored. Her throat was sore because of the strength of the moans she couldn't hold, just as her arms were spasmodically holding around the shoulders of the woman who was ravaging her body. The heel of that merciless hand started to brush on her clit with every thrust and Lexa’s green eyes burned inside her own.  
  
And Clarke got lost.  
  
Her mouth fell open in a silent scream, her body arched in an almost painful spasm and a stream of hot pleasure welled around the fingers that were taking her as she has never been taken before. Lexa’s eyes widened for a moment, then her mouth was on her skin again, reaching her lips, dragging her back to earth.  
  
Clarke fell back on the table, exhausted, her leg wrapping instinctively around Lexa’s hips as she jerked a little when Lexa’s fingers left her body. Lexa’s body fell on her, her head had cradled on her chest as her hot breath tickled her skin. They stayed like that, entwined, their breaths ragged as the passion slowly faded, leaving them silent and exhausted. But when Lexa’s mouth started to move again on her breasts, licking and biting gently on it, clearly showing that she wasn’t finished yet, Clarke decided that she’d had enough.  
  
She let her take care of her skin as her lips drew patterns on her stomach, then she put a foot on her shoulder using all the strength she had left to push her away. Taken by surprise, Lexa tumbled backwards, she stumbled over a can of paint and fell on her ass on the ground.   
  
Before she could realize what has just happened, Clarke crawled on her lap, naked and gorgeous; Clarke’s hands slipped in her hair, pulling hard her head back. They stared long into each other eyes, then Clarke’s lips closed on her own, demanding, her tongue slipping forcefully in her mouth.   
Lexa found herself with her back pressed on the floor, Clarke’s naked breasts against her own and her hot tongue in her mouth, as frantic hands were opening her trousers, stopping just to scratch on the sensitive skin of her abdomen.  
  
Lexa kicked away her shoes, her hands slipping through the fall of blonde hair tickling her face and her neck. Clarke’s lips finally left her mouth, trailing down on her body as famished eyes raised to steal her gaze away and playful fingers slipped in her underwear, finding the hot pool of her passion. Feeling those fingers find her entrance made her swear, just to leave it immediately to draw slow, perfect pattern on her clit. Her head shot back as she panted and moaned, she was so close already. She could already feel her clit frantically pulse under Clarke’s focused ministrations, ready to contract in a last agonizing spasm.   
  
And then it stopped.   
  
Lexa's eyes shoot open and, frustrated for the sudden lack of contact, she searched Clarke’s gaze only to find it focused on something between them. Her jaw went slack, seeing Clarke's fingers before her, glistening with her humors, a proud smile playing on those perfect lips swollen for the kisses and bites they’ve exchanged.  
  
Clarke liked her lips and Lexa trembled. “You’re so wet…” she purred, taking Lexa’s hand and dragging it to her lips “And I just can’t wait to know what you taste like…”and with that she sucked Lexa’s finger, that just moments before was buried deep inside her.  
  
Lexa mouth fell open as she felt Clarke’s tongue swirl around her finger and suck on it, staring at her as if she wanted to swallow her whole. If she thought she could get off just with that, when Clarke added her own finger in her mouth, letting their tastes mix, Lexa’s lungs emptied. She felt the heat between her legs increase at the sounds Clarke was letting out as she sucked enthusiastically: she was the sexiest thing she’d ever seen. When she finally let go, she leaned in, pressing her mouth on Lexa’s to allow her a taste and making her head spin.   
  
Clarke’s fingers found her sex again. She didn’t bother to tease her this time, she found her entrance and let two fingers slip inside of her. She enjoyed the moan Lexa let out and her mouth fell to biting the skin on her throat. Lexa contorted under the sweet weight of that warm body, already overwhelmed by the pleasure. Those skilled fingers never gave her rest, slipping through her wet folds, finding all the right places inside of her, as her muscles frantically contracted around them.   
  
She arched her back, moaning in despair, the orgasm ready to flow through her body, but once more Clarke stopped, denying her the release of that almost painful tension. She moaned in frustration feeling those fingers slipping out of her pulsing sex, but Clarke’s mouth swallowed her frustrated moan, demanding, as her tongue playfully caressed the roof of her mouth, before leaving again.   
  
“Not so fast.” That velvet voice purred, right on her lips. “I’ve waited six years for you to notice me, for you to give me the courtesy of your attention, now it’s your turn to wait.”  
  
Lexa's breath got caught in her throat in front of the famished stare of those ice blue eyes, as the hands that were torturing her gripped her hips, slipping under the band of her underwear.  
  
“And besides…” Clarke went on, a mischievous smirk on her lips, while she pulled both trousers and underwear off her body. “I want my mouth to be the first to bring you to the stars.”  
  
Lexa swallowed watching those glorious blonde hair slip on her chest, as Clarke’s lips stopped on her breast, capturing a stiff nipple in her hot mouth and then they started again their descent on her body, the tongue caressing her skin. When she finally reached the apex of her thighs, she didn’t wait any longer, she raised her legs above her shoulder, gripping on her ass with both hands as her mouth reached for her wet folds.   
  
Lexa threw her head back, moaning at the feeling of that hot tongue on her. She pushed her hips against Clarke’s face, looking for more contact. Clarke kissed the outer lips and gently sucked on them before licking slowly along her slit up and down. And God, Lexa was going to explode when she felt that tongue reach for her entrance drawing slow circle around it without dipping in, her hands reached for Clarke's hair, gently tugging on them in a silent prayer.  
  
All she got was an appreciative moan that sent shivers down her spine as Clarke reached for her clit, sucking gently on it and swirling her tongue around it.  
  
“Jesus…” Lexa cursed covering her face with one arm.   
  
That treatment was driving her crazy and when she finally felt Clarke’s tongue push inside of her, she tugged her hair, keeping her there. Clarke’s head started to move between her legs, pushing deeper and deeper in a focused rhythm. Lexa started to whimper, her chest rising and falling at the rhythm of her ragged breath and when she felt Clarke’s thumb caress her clit, playful, the orgasm hit her. She let out a strong moan, clinging on Clarke’s tongue, as her body trembled, her hips grinding against her face for more contact.   
  
Clarke’s tongue didn't leave her sex until her body started to relax and her thighs let go the spasmodic lock around that blonde head. She felt her slip out of her, licking greedily on her wet folds.  
  
“ _Fuck!_ ”  
  
An almost imperceptible stroke, but that hot breath was still there, tickling on her clit, teasing it, making it pulse for more attentions. The stare of those blue eyes burnt between her thighs almost as much as that ragged breath, and Lexa felt a new wave of wet desire.   
  
“You’re _so_ ready for me.” Clarke whispered on her, her mouth stroking gently on her outer lips, making her squirm for more.  
  
She felt a quick kiss, then two fingers buried themselves in her, dipping strong and firm, as a hot mouth sucked her clit. Clarke’s name burst out of her throat while the fingers slowly retreated from her until they were completely out. Clarke spent a good amount of time on her clit, sucking, biting and drawing quick circles with her tongue, leaving her breathless. Then that hot mouth climbed her body, stopping to kiss her navel and to give some attention to her nipples, while Clarke lifted Lexa’s legs around her hips. She jumped feeling those skilled fingers between her thighs, but Clarke's mouth swallowed her moan, giving her a taste of herself.   
  
“Look at me.” Clarke whispered hoarse.  
  
Lexa threw her head back in pleasure, at the feeling of those fingers on her clit, letting out a little cry when merciless teeth bit her lower lip.   
  
“I said, look at me, Lexa!”  
  
And Lexa opened her eyes.  
  
Her mouth fell open in a silent cry, while she drowned in those sky blue irises and three fingers dived into her sex, hitting the perfect spot inside of her.They were both taken by surprise by her sudden orgasm, that made her arch her back, while Clarke didn’t stop, but she kept her sweet torture until Lexa produced another wave of pleasure, even stronger than the other still ravaging through her. When the waves of the orgasms finally left her, Lexa closed her eyes, exhausted, Clarke’s limp body on her own. She could still feel her fingers buried inside of her, but as soon as she opened her eyes, the sound of the door of the gallery opening echoed through the walls.   
  
“Miss Griffin?” A male voice called as slow steps advanced.   
  
Clarke retreated from Lexa's sensitive sex and shot to her feet, giving her a quick glance as she retrieved her salopette.“I’m in the study, Bill!” Clarke shouted as she dressed as fast as she could forgoing her bra, unconcerned of the fact that her ripped underwear laid under the table. “J-just a minute.”   
  
She gave Lexa another look: her breath was ragged, her naked body was covered in paint, her hair messy, eyes glistening, her cheeks flushed and her skin showed the marks of her mouth. Their eyes met for a long moment, then Clarke slipped out of the study, closing the door behind her to keep curious eyes away from what has just happened. Lexa stayed there on the floor for a long moment, trying to calm her breath, while the weight of what has just happened hit hard on her. She slowly got up, trying to control her shivering limbs, as she collected her clothes, the violence of the passion that had possessed them finally sinking in.  
  


The studio seemed a battlefield, the floor was covered in mixed colors that held the prints of their entwined bodies. She slipped a nervous hand through her hair to tame them only to find it covered in a painfully paint of blue close to Clarke’s eyes. Incapable of keeping in check the turmoil inside her chest she quickly put on her ruined clothes. She had to get out of there. She had to get out of there immediately in order to not make, an already difficult situation even worse.   
  
Her ripped shirt was a serious problem since that morning she hadn't put on a bra. Shaking her shoulders she tied together the useless pieces of cloth, covering herself the best she could, just to get to the car without showing her breast to half Washington. She was putting her shoes on when the door of the studio opened and Clarke silently slipped inside. Their eyes searched each other as a tense, awkward silence enveloped the room. Lexa took her time to scan how even Clarke’s body showed the marks of their passion.  
  
Her neck and chest, barely covered by the oversized salopette, was covered by little red spots, her blonde hair was a mess of colors just as her legs.  
  
“I wanted to tell you…” Clarke whispered as those words broke the tense silence, Lexa’s jaw had a little spasm. “But, I never found the right moment and-”  
  
“Please, do not insult my intelligence.” Lexa growled. “You never found the right moment? We spent eight damn days together and you never found a moment to tell me?!” Clarke tried to answer but Lexa took a step toward her, blocking her reply. “I’ve let you in, Clarke, I told you things I haven’t talked about in six years.” she stopped in front of her. “And when we were in Africa, after what I told you, you had the gut to look me in the eyes and lie to me.”   
  
“It’s not like that.” Clarke replied. “I w-was about to tell you, then Raven came and dragged you away and-”  
  
“Please cut those lame useless excuses.” she growled with stiff voice. “You played me like a fool, Clarke.”  
  
“You didn't even remember my name, Lexa! Or my face!” she said aloud.   
  
“And this gave you the right to lie to me ?!” Lexa asked angry.   
  
“No, of course not.” Clarke defended herself immediately. “Lexa, I tried to tell you, I really tried -”   
  
“And I guess you got what you wanted, haven't you?!” Lexa interrupted with a bitter grin, gesturing to the gallery.   
  
“What? No! This is not wh-”   
  
“But it doesn't matter, do you know why?”   
  
Her voice was so distant and cold that Clarke felt a shiver down her spine and she realized that Lexa was about to say something bad, something she would regret, she saw Lexa reaching for her pocket.   
  
“I had what I wanted too.”  
  
Without further words and without even looking at her, she threw a couple of notes at her.  
  
That was it.   
  
As if of it’s own accord, Clarke’s hand shot through the space between them, leaving a green trail on Lexa’s cheek and turning her head with the strength of the impact. Her eyes stared for a long moment on her features hardened in rage, before they shot to the ground to hide the tears welling up.  
  
“ _ **Get. Out!**_ ” She hissed in a trembling voice, her teeth clenched to hold the whimper raising from the bottom of her throat.  
  
She felt those green eyes burn for a long moment on her face, then Lexa’s steps echoed in the empty silence around them, and she disappeared behind the gallery door.   
  
Only then Clarke let herself let out a strangled moan, collapsing on the floor in a trembling cocoon.   


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll take two minutes to tell you something:
> 
> I read all your comments and I wish you would not be so hard on Lexa.  
> Like many of you had said, Lexa had no right to be angry and it's true, but in the same time Clarke had no right to lie to her.  
> Lexa has been wrong about many things but she's stubborn as hell. She wanted Clarke to felt what she had felt when she had discovered that Clarke was lying to her. Lexa knows she is not innocent in that situation, she knows. Lexa is also able to recognize when she's wrong, but she needed to touch the bottom to understand she was really broken.  
> So, pls, just don't give up on her.
> 
> I know this chapter was strong in many ways, so I had already translated the next chapter, so stay tuned, you will have it in a couple of days.


	14. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for any mistakes
> 
> And now as I have promised...

**Chapter 13**

  
Anya knew she did not have to but Lexa had ignored every single call she made and after the way she stepped outside her office in blind rage, she needed to make sure Lexa did not do something stupid. But when she had entered in the apartment using the spare key that Lexa had given her for emergencies, she had found all strangely silent, so she decided to wait for her.  
  
When Lexa had returned a few hours later, Anya was scared to note that her green eyes were dull and cold as ever she’d never ever seen before. They had been friends for a lifetime, they both had seen the best and worst of each other. They had lived together adolescence, high school, a life of hard choices, love gone bad, loss of parents, girlfriends’ death...

But when she met her eyes, Anya had understood that this would not have been an easy obstacle to overcome, no matter how much their friendship was strong and had resisted at the worst storms.  
  
Lexa stared at her intently, her jaw tight in a painful grip and her eyes full of fire. “What are you doing here?” she asked.  
  
Then Anya took her time to stare at her, noticing the way one of her expensive shirts was rolled up under her breasts, the way her pants were dirty with paint and marks on her neck.  
  
“Lexa, wha-”  
  
“What are you doing here?” she asked in a hard voice.  
  
Then Anya stood up from the couch and took a few steps toward her, surprised when her friend made one back, putting distance between them and that gesture wounded her more than she wanted to admit.  
  
“I came to make sure you didn't do something crazy but mostly to explain myself.”  
  
Lexa laughed without humor. “You have nothing to explain.” she said sharply. “You're not my nanny, Anya, I can do what I want, when I want.”  
  
“Lexa...” she began shaking her head. “I know it was wrong not to tell you but you were so happy when you told me about Clarke the first time, so I decided to give you some time to know her. And above all that was Clarke’s place to tell you the truth.” she continued, noticing her friend's eyes darken with every word. “Then you've pulled out of the contract and -”  
  
“And you let me humiliate myself!” Lexa growled angrily. “You let me, your friend of a lifetime, act like a damn dog wagging and you left me at the mercy of-” she froze in mid-sentence and closed her eyes tightly.  
  
When she did, her mind was invaded by memories of a few hours before: intertwined bodies, moans, burning kisses, blue eyes and a strong feeling that she had done nothing but fill her heart with each touch.  
  
“Don't be mean.” Anya said. “God, Lexa, I've never seen you so happy as in Clarke's company and yes, I was wrong, I know.” she put it clear.  
  
“Wrong? You've practically stabbed me in the back! Apart from being my lawyer, you're my friend, my best friend.”  
  
“I know and-”   
  
“It was your duty to tell me, it was your duty to preserve my heart. I opened up to Clarke, I told her about Costia, my parents and now everything has gone to hell!”  
  
“She wanted to tell you, Lexa, she really wanted but there was no chance-”  
  
Lexa laughed, a loud and feelingless laughter. Those were the same words that Clarke had said and for some reason hearing them from Anya's mouth, from one of the few people she had left, it was even worse.  
  
“She hasn't got a chance?!” she said angrily. “She spent a week alone with me, I opened my heart to her and in return I received only lies!”  
  
“Jesus, Lexa, listen to me!” Anya shouted trying to get her attention and to make her way into her stubbornness armor. “Clarke wanted to tell you, she asked me to wait to give you the divorce papers because she wanted to be the one to tell you.” she continued. “She knew it was wrong but also the way you approached her was wrong, now you can't blame her for acting in this way.”  
  
Lexa gripped her jaw. “So it’s my fault?!” she asked. “Her cowardliness?! You stabbing my back is my fault?!"  
  
“No, God! This is your problem, you never listen when people talk to you!” Anya snarled. “You never listen! You see only your point of view and you're stubborn like a damn wall!”  
  
“What ar-”  
  
She stopped in mid-sentence when Anya's finger headed straight in the middle of her chest.  
  
“Now you listen to me.” the lawyer boomed. “Did you try to put yourself in her shoes? Have you ever tried to imagine how she felt to the idea of having to tell you this big truth? Yes, you opened to her but six years ago you've barely looked at her in the eyes and then you had her to sign a contract.”  
  
“She could have said no.” Lexa said.  
  
“Don't tell bullshit, Lexa. There were at least two hundred people at risk, without your money those people would have been left without a job, you were the safest choice for all those people.” she continued. “So you can't certainly accuse her of cowardice, when you had shown her to be able to get what you want only with your name.”  
  
The words hit her like a slap in the face, strong, intense, painful, just like the one Clarke had given her only a few hours earlier. And what had happened hit her like a runaway train, making her feel sick. The way she had taken Clarke, so brutal, made her step back and the words Anya said began to echo in her mind. She had done a horrible thing, she had poured over Clarke all the pain, the loneliness and anger she had felt all those years.  
  
“Oh God...” she murmured, closing her eyes.  
  
Every time she closed her eyes, she could see the red marks she had left on Clarke's body, she could feel the way she said her name and she could still feel the warm body against hers.  
  
“Lexa...” Anya murmured softly realizing the strong words she had addressed.  
  
It was not what she had in mind when she went to Lexa's: she had gone there to apologize, to explain, to try to make her understand, certainly not to accuse her. But when her friend looked up, Anya realized that there was something more, something that had nothing to do with the sentence that she had just spoken.  
  
“Go away.” Lexa murmured with a lump in her throat.  
  
“It was not what I meant, Lexa.” Anya tried again, placing her hand on her friend's arm.  
  
Lexa pulled away as if her touch burned and walked away a few steps. “Go away.” she repeated again. “I want to be alone.”  
  
“Lexa...”  
  
“Get out of here!” Lexa yelled and then, without another word, she walked quickly toward her room.  
  
Only when the front door closed, bringing away her best friend, Lexa fell back on the bed, her face in her hands and she breathed heavily.  
  
For the first time since she was a teenager, she was afraid of having a panic attack.  
  
  
****  
  
Octavia smiled at the sight of Clarke asleep on her bed, her hand on Luna's belly and the other under her cheek to support her face. Her friend had shown up at her house that morning and even though she had not said much, Octavia had realized that she needed a place to escape from her thoughts and she was more than happy to offer Clarke that safe port. When Lincoln had mentioned her doctor's appointment, Clarke had immediately offered to stay with the child and Octavia had gladly accepted.  
  
She closed the door softly behind her, determined to let Clarke sleep some more, she was aware that her friend needed to rest. Octavia had read in her eyes sleep deprivation, her blue irises, once brilliant, were clouded by tiredness and something else that she could not identify.  
  
“Are they sleeping?” Lincoln asked with a smile.  
  
Octavia nodded. “I decided to let her rest a little longer. In the meantime, could my wonderful husband make us lunch?” she asked wrapping her arms around his neck.  
  
“All you want, wonderful wife.” Lincoln said bending down to kiss her gently lips.  
  
Clarke made her entrance into the kitchen fifteen minutes later with tired eyes and she took a seat on one of the stools, yawning and glancing at the two moving in perfect sync to prepare lunch.  
  
“There you are! I hope you're hungry, because I prepared one of your favorite dishes.” Lincoln began.  
  
Clarke smiled weakly, trying to ignore as best as she could the nausea that gripped her stomach. She had not eaten something substantial for days and she was not sure she would be able to swallow something but she would never give displeasure to any of her friends.  
  
“I can only be hungry then.” she said, lowering her face under the curious gaze of both.   
  
Fortunately, Luna called attention from her parents with a desperate cry. Lincoln dropped his spoon on the table and leaned over to kiss his wife on the forehead.  
  
“I'll go.” Lincoln reassured and Clarke was sure he did it on purpose to leave them alone.  
  
Octavia followed him with her eyes until he disappeared down the hall and she sat down directly in front of her friend, tilting her head to one side; but when she saw Clarke escapeing from her gaze, she decided to speak immediately.  
  
“Don't take this in the wrong way, I'm glad you're here but considering the amount of work that you have, I find it extremely bizarre.”she began. “And the fact that you are so silent, just let me think that you have something in your mind.”  
  
Clarke bit her lower lip, the weight of all that had happened in the past few weeks was trying to get out and to pour in a flood of words. Octavia leaned across the table and squeezed her hand with love, making her heart jump. They were friends for a lifetime, they found themselves after Clarke had run away and never once, Octavia asked her why she left.   
  
“I broke up with Finn.” she murmured with a whisper.  
  
Octavia waited for her to continue: she knew from the first moment about Finn's proposal, but she did not know that Clarke had refused. “Honey... why? I thought you loved him.” she said softly.  
  
Clarke felt something inside her break at that tone, the need to confess everything oppressed her: Lexa and the sudden and hasty marriage were things that Clarke had buried deep inside of her and then she had tried to forget with all her strength. She knew she was married just for the monthly check she received in her bank account but nothing more. It did not matter how many times over the years, those green eyes had appeared in her thoughts more than she wanted or how many times she had dreamed how it would be like a future beside Alexandria Woods.  
  
“Clarke-” Octavia began but she stopped when she saw tears running down on her friend's cheeks  
  
“I need to tell you something.” she muttered, passing her hands over her face. “Actually, I need to tell you a lot of things, but I do not know where to start.”

“You can tell me anything you want.” Octavia assured gripping her hand. “I'm here.”

Clarke stared at her and for the first time in six years, she took off from her shoulders the secret she had saved so jealously and almost ripped her apart.  
  
  
****  
  
The apartment was quiet and the strong smell of closed immediately reached Lexa's nose. She took off her coat, resting it at the coat hanger carefully, reproducing the movements that she had done so many times. She walked down the small corridor, looking at the living room and focusing on the photos still hung on the walls. She headed toward the center of the room, where the big piano was watching her, she swallowed as she approached, stroking the outside with trembling fingers.  
  
She sat on the stool and opened the lid, being welcomed by dust that had settled there because of the long time. She hasn't gone into that apartment for years and it was still all the same. It was as if time had stopped, encapsulating everything in that vision of perfection. She touched the keys and closed her eyes, holding back the tears once again threatening to get out. She had not cried since her mother's funeral, she always swallowed up all the feelings, allowing it to rest on the bottom of her soul.  
  
Crying was a weakness.  
  
Showing others to be vulnerable was a weakness.  
  
Love was a weakness.  
  
But she had loved.  
  
She had loved as never before in her life and after the death of Costia she had thought of no longer being able to experience that feeling. Then, Clarke Griffin had come into her life, with her eyes, her laughter, her person, her intelligence and the fate had played with her and with her life once again: they were married.  
  
She was her wife.  
  
And more she thought about it, more she realized that she had been stupid and blind not to have understood before. She should have remembered those wonderful blue eyes, or the mole that made her crazy since the first moment and her features... Lexa ran her fingers on the piano keys, producing a sound that made her understand that the piano was untone and the memories began to mix in her mind at the sound of that melody.  
  
  
\- _“Lexa, stop it, Lexa!” Costia complained moving away from h_ _er_ _touch. “I need to practice, otherwise the teacher-”  
“Don't think about __her_ _,_ _play_ _for_ _me.” Lexa whispered tenderly kissing her neck. “Just for me.”  
  
  
_ ** _*_ _“I'm playing, Lexa!” she exclaimed with wide eyes. “I've never played anything in my life!”_ _  
_ _“Yes, Clarke, you're playing.”_ _  
_ _“Again.” she said. “Do it again.”_   
  
  
** \- “ _You look beautiful, Lexa.” Costia murmured with tears of happiness in her eyes. “_ _Grabbing Alexandria Woods’s arm_ _I'll be the luckiest girl_ _at_ _the whole party.”  
Lexa blushed slightly and leaned to take her hand. “I'll be the luckiest girl, you take my breath away.”  
Costia smiled and placed the bow tie before bending down to kiss her softly.  
  
  
  
_ ** _*_ _“You are really beautiful in this dress.” Lexa said in a whisper._ _  
__“You too.” Clarke muttered, looking at her through the mirror._ _“And without doing it on purpose, you matched the tie with my dress.” She continued in a whisper._ **  
  
  
_\- Lexa had never felt such a great joy in embracing such a small thing in her arms and she would have_ _never_ _thought she could feel so good at the side of a person but with Costia_ _it_ _was always a new big discovery.  
“You know how to do it and he likes you a lot: it's the first time he stopped crying since we arrived.” Costia murmured resting her head on Lexa's shoulder.  
Lexa smiled and leaned down to give a kiss on Hassan's head, seeing his dark eyes focused on her.  
“Do you want children?” Costia asked.  
There was a long moment of silence and finally Lexa nodded. “One day, when we are happy and sussed.”_  
  
  
 ** _*_ _“He eventually let you go.” Clarke broke the silence, referring to the child who had embraced Raven's good leg._ _  
_ _Lexa smiled happily and nodded. “I am one of the first pe_ _ople_ _who saw Hassan when he was brought here.” she explained. “He is very attached to me and every time I come here there’s no way I can escape from him and, to be honest, I don’t even know if I want to”._ _  
_** _ **Clarke was enchanted: she never thought that someone like Lexa could love children but she could see how her eyes changed when she was in their presence**._   
  
  
_\- Her lips were soft and sweet, Lexa's heart seemed about to explode and when Costia's hand rested on the back of her neck to draw her closer, she felt her heart jump in her throat.  
It was Lexa's first kiss and it was as if she had lived her entire life just waiting for that moment, since Lexa saw Costia getting into the living room of her house.  
“I've been waiting for this moment since I realized that you were interested in me.”  
“I was afraid of not being able.” Lexa said.  
Costia smiled and leaned back to kiss her again: and there was a slow, sweet and gentle kiss.  
“Wow...” she murmured into the girl’s mouth.  
Lexa just nodded, she never felt so happy in her entire life._  
  
  
 ** _*She let Lexa's eyes tie her, she let Lexa’s green irises feed her and she felt attracted by her full lips. She felt Lexa's hand continue to caress her with reverence and she decided to not fight anymore. Clarke leaned forward slightly and she felt Lexa's body tense up for a second, but when her lips rested on Lexa’s, in a gentle caress, she heard her sigh of surrender.  
It was only a gentle touch, like the beating of a butterfly but Clarke was able to clearly taste the flavor of those lips. The lips she had wanted to taste from the moment she had seen Lexa at the diner six year_ _s_ _before. That thought made her shiver and when Lexa’s hand went through her hair, on her neck, with the intention to deepen the kiss, Clarke pulled away as if she had been burned.  
“I c-can't.” she said with the heart beating wildly. “I ca-can't, I'm so-sorry, Lexa” she stood up and put as much space as possible between them.  
“It's okay, I understand.” Lexa assured her but when she saw the panic on Clarke's face, she stood up ready to reassure her; she was surprised when Clarke stepped away again, frightened by her presence. “Clarke, it's okay.” she repeated._**  
  
  
 _\- Her hands were shaking while_ _she was_ _caressing Costia's naked body, venerating her as she had never done with any other thing in her life. She could not believe what had happened, she could not believe_ _the_ _wonderful feeling she had experienced when Costia had kiss_ _ed_ _, touch_ _ed_ _and lov_ _ed_ _her.  
“I love you.” Costia murmured in a gasp, feeling her girlfriend increasing her thrusts.  
“I love you too.” Lexa whispered bend_ _ing_ _down to kiss her neck. “I love you too.”_  
  
  
 ** _*_ _“_ _Tell me you want me.” she claimed in a husky voice.  
Clarke gasped, closing her eyes tightly and biting her lips to the wave of wet desire that released between her legs.  
_ _“_ _Tell me!" Lexa ordered biting the delicate skin behind her ear.  
_ _“_ _I want you!” Clarke gasped against the cold wood of the table, moaning loud at the feeling of Lexa's fingers on her clit.  
_ _“_ _I can't hear you.” Lexa growled biting the skin of her shoulders and spine.  
_ _“_ _I want you,_ _you know I want you_ _.” Clarke repeated brokenly. “Shit!” she groaned, feeling Lexa’s fingers slide up and down of her slick folds._ **_  
  
  
\- “This behavior is absurd, Lexa,” Costia said raising her arms to the sky. “You never_ _address_ _a discussion, you hold everything in and I have to guess what is bothering you!”  
“You talk enough for both.” Lexa said taking the glass to her lips. “I __do_ _not like to fight, I do not want to discuss, I'm not that kind of person.” she explained once again. “Often I can say things I might regret and I do not want to hurt people I care about with my own words, Cos.”  
Costia clenched her jaw. “It's not a good excuse to __act_ _like a passive aggressive person! Tell me what you think in my face, Alexandria, otherwise I'll say something I might regret!”  
“Costia-”  
“You're insufferable, insolent and stubborn!” Costia said.  
“And you can not understand when I need to be alone and you're so childish!” she responded slamming the glass on the table.  
The look Costia gave her told her that __that_ _was the intent from the be_ _ginning_ _and when she approached to hug her, Lexa sighed full of guilty.  
  
  
 *****_ ** _“No, of course not.” Clarke defended herself immediately. “Lexa, I tried to tell you, I really tried -”  
“And I guess you got what you wanted, haven't you?!” Lexa interrupted with a bitter grin, gesturing to the gallery.  
“What? No! This is not wh-”  
“But it doesn't matter, do you know why?”  
Her voice was so distant and cold that Clarke felt a shiver down her spine and she realized that Lexa was about to say something bad, something she would regret, she saw Lexa reaching for her pocket.  
_ _“_ _I had what I wanted too.”  
Without further words and without even looking at her, she threw a couple of notes at her.  
That was it._ _  
_ _As if of it’s own accord, Clarke’s hand shot through the space between them, leaving a green trail on Lexa’s cheek and turning her head with the strength of the impact. Her eyes stared for a long moment on her features hardened in rage, before they shot to the ground to hide the tears welling up.  
  
  
_** And as if Clarke had slapped her in that moment, Lexa closed her eyes tightly and stopped the movement of the fingers on the piano keys, choking back tears at the memory of the hurt look that was painted on Clarke's face.  
  
She had ruined everything.  
  
Anya was right: she had behaved selfishly and she had no right to accuse Clarke that way but pride and stubbornness had prevented her from seeing the truth.  
  
“I miss you, Costia.” she whispered softly to the walls of that apartment who had acted as a witness to their love story. “I messed up, baby.” she continued. “You'll be ashamed so much of me and what I did, I could not even look at you.”  
  
She put her hands to her face and let herself be taken from the memories of Costia and Clarke, which began to blend with each other, making legs and heart tremble.  
  
  
****  
  
  
The phone rang insistently for at least five minutes: whoever was on the other side, was really in a hurry to talk to her. Clarke tried desperately to ignore it, increasing the power of the water and putting her head under the jet. She would not answer, even if it was work. She heard the ringing stop and she smiled slightly, successful and then she turned off the water, before leaning and wrapping herself in a towel, coming out of the shower with caution. She rubbed her hair with another towel and she walked into her room; she just wanted to put on pajamas and throw herself on the bed to rest.  
  
Talking to Octavia had completely emptied her but unlike she had expected, it felt good. She had listened in silence and never judged, she had simply wiped away her tears and held her. But when Clarke had calmed down and they finally had lunch, Octavia had kept repeating: “I can not believe you've been married for six years and you've never said anything to me.”   
  
Clarke had also explained to Lincoln the situation and the man had taken her in his strong arms, offering her a place to stay for as long as she needed. Clarke had thanked him and she had spent the night with them before going back to her apartment. She had enjoyed the hospitality but she really needed to work. She dropped the towel to the floor and allowed the cool air to caress her body, then she grabbed her coconut cream from the bedside table and she began to rub it on her skin, rubbing her belly, breasts and thighs. She jumped when the phone began to ring again on the large wooden drawers.  
  
It was a number she did not know.  
  
She frowned and bit her lower lip undecided whether to take the call. Finally she sighed and pressed the green button to answer. “Hello?”  
  
 _ **“Clarke, I**_ _ **’ve been**_ _ **calling you**_ _ **all**_ _ **afternoon!**_ ” Anya's voice reached her ears and it was pretty clear she was snowy.  
  
“Excuse me, I've been busy.” Clarke said, as she felt in duty to justify herself. “I do not want to seem rude, but-”  
  
“ _ **Have you seen**_ _ **Lexa?**_ ” she snapped, anxiety filled voice.  
  
Clarke tensed at the sound of that name but a call from Anya could mean only one thing. “No, I -” she said softly. “The last time I saw her was at Raven's birthday.” she lied.   
  
“ _ **Shit**_.” Anya cursed. Clarke heard Anya talking to someone softly and she was almost sure it was Raven. “ _ **Okay, than-**_ ”   
  
“Anya, what's happening?"  
  
There was a long moment of silence and then Anya sighed. “ _ **Lexa has not come to work for days.**_ ” she said. “ _ **She has not answered any of my calls and she does not come back home.**_ ”  
  
Clarke felt her heart squeezing in a painful vise. “How many days?” she whispered.  
  
“ _ **Four**_.” she said. “ _ **The day after Raven's birthday we had a fight and from that moment I am no longer able to reach her.**_ ” she continued. “ _ **I was hoping that she had been in touch with you.**_ ”  
  
Clarke appraised to tell Anya the truth before realizing that if Lexa had known about the divorce papers, it was because she probably had found them on her desk and it had been the reason of their fight.  
  
“She came to the gallery on the day after Raven's birthday.” Clarke said. “W-we had a fight, she knew about the marriage and about the divorce papers, then she left, I have not seen her since then.”  
  
Anya was silent. “ _ **Did s**_ _ **omething**_ _ **happen**_ _ **during the fight?**_ ” she asked cautiously.  
  
Clarke shook her head, then she realized that the woman could not see her. “No.” she whispered-  
  
She heard a sigh come from the lawyer's lips. “ _ **I'll let you know, okay?**_ ” she said softly. “ _ **Don't worry, I'll find her. She can'**_ _ **t**_ _ **be vanished into thin air.**_ ”  
  
“Okay, I'll wait then.” Clarke said. “Anya...thanks.”  
  
“ _ **I'm not doing this for you, Clarke, you know very well that I did not agree on how both of you have handled th**_ _ **ese**_ _ **things.**_ ” she said with a clipped tone. “ _ **But Lexa is my friend, my family and despite everything I'm also worried about you. I know Lexa can be quite impulsive when she's hurt and cornered: are you sure you're okay?**_ ”  
  
“I'm fine.” Clarke said. “Find her, okay? I h-have to go but I'll be here waiting for your call.”   
  
“ _ **I will.**_ ” Anya reassured her. “ _ **Have a good evening, Clarke.**_ ”  
  
“You too, Anya.”  
  
And with that the communication ended and Clarke dropped the phone on the bed, she closed her eyes and swallowed, while the nausea caught her, catching her breathless. Just the thought that Lexa could be gone, just as she was willing to do after Costia's death, had tightened her heart in a painful vise. She got up from the bed, still naked and she reached the closet. Her eyes found immediately what she was looking for, on the top shelf there was a white box, Clarke leaned over to grab it and slowly removed the lid.  
  
Even after all these years that expensive coat made her legs tremble.  
  
Clarke stroked it with her fingertips, softly, almost with reverence, before taking it out from the box and bringing it to her face, burying her nose in the fabric. She could still smell that wonderful scent, the one, the night she had married Lexa, had wrapped her like a safe cloak. She closed her eyes and some tears flowed down her cheeks, while all the feelings she felt for Lexa made her feel weak and vulnerable. She was deeply in love with Lexa from the first moment she saw her.  
  
Still holding the jacket to her chest, she reached the bed, she sat down slowly with her nose still on the fabric and finally she fell onto the mattress. She wrapped herself in the cloak that always made her feel safe, just like she did that night and she finally cried.  
  
  
****  
  
Raven looked at Costia's name written in large letters on the door and she put the key in the lock, praying that Lexa was there, just as Anya had assumed. She was worried about her friend like never before and she knew that after the fight with Anya, she desperately needed someone. When the door opened, the dimness of the room enveloped her, Raven stepped through the door, closing it behind her.  
  
“Lexa?” she called softly, as if she was afraid to disturb her.  
  
There was only silence and after Raven had dropped the keys on the cabinet, she began to walk into the dark hallway and she took her time to look around at the photographs on the walls. A sad smile painted on Raven's lips, her mind flooded with memories, moments she had been present most of the time.  
  
“Lexa?” she called again, this time with a slightly higher tone.  
  
Raven stepped into the living room and what she saw left her pleasantly surprised: Lexa was curled up on the couch, wrapped in an old blanket, the table was strewn with boxes of take aways and it was evident that the girl hadn’t taken a shower for a few days. She walked over to the couch and put her hand on Lexa's cheek to wake her up.  
  
“Lexa.” She whispered, caressing her cheek with the tip of her thumb. “Come on, wake up, you really need a shower and I don't want to carry you.”  
  
Lexa blinked a few times at the sound of her name. “Raven?” she murmured softly. “Wh-what are you doing here?” she asked, sitting up, moving away from her touch.   
  
“When was the last time you took a shower?” Raven asked instead, tilting her head, watching Lexa's unbuttoned shirt, her tousled and her hair that had definitely seen better days.  
  
Lexa did not answer, she dropped the blanket on the floor and wiped her hands on her tired face, trying to awaken herself to be able to pay attention to Raven.  
  
“Okay, what if I go to buy a coffee and something to eat, while you take a shower?”

“I don't need a shower.” Lexa said earning in return a raised eyebrow. “Raven-”   
  
“Nothing Raven.” she snapped. “I'll get something to eat and I clean all this mess but when I return, I want you to be showered: we need to talk.”  
  
Lexa sighed heavily and she knew that arguing with Raven would have been useless, so she just nodded and sat down against the back of the sofa, while Raven reached the table. She saw the girl moving around, picking up all the take away containers and bringing them together all in one bag.  
  
“Fifteen minutes, Lexa.” Raven said. “If I still find you in this position when I get back, leg or no leg, I will drag you to the shower.” she warned, before heading to the door.  
  
The next sound was just the door closing.  
  
Raven came back exactly twenty minutes later, with coffee and a bag with a few donuts in her hands. When she crossed the door, she was pleasantly surprised to see Lexa clean. Her wet hair were tied in a pair of braids and Lexa was wearing a large T-shirt that reached just below her knees.  
  
“That's better.” she said with a smile, putting the cup on the table and handing to her the bag with the donuts.   
  
Lexa did not answer, she took a sip of coffee and played with the edge of the bag, knowing that if she did not take at least one bite of that donut, probably Raven would have fed her like a child. So, with a sigh, Lexa grabbed it and brought it to her lips, biting. There was a long moment of silence and finally Lexa stared at her friend, waiting, almost as she expected a scolding. Surprisingly Raven brushed a strand of hair that had escaped from her braids and smiled sweetly.  
  
“What has happened, Lexa?” she asked with a small voice.  
  
“I'm sure that Anya has already told you everything.” she said swallowing.  
  
“She told me that you and her have argued, but she did not elaborate on the topic and this made me worry a lot.” she said. “Anya tells me everything but I knew from her eyes that there was no need to insist.”  
  
Lexa pointed her eyes on her cup, ashamed. “There’s nothing much to say, she told me I am a bully without morals and I yelled at her to leave.  
  
Raven frowned at those words and stared at her. “It is not the first time she tells you these things.” she pointed out. “But I have the impression that the context was different.” when Lexa did not answer, she tried to make up her mind. “Is it something about Clarke?”  
  
Lexa looked up immediately and in the end, defeated, she nodded, before returning to stare at her cup, failing to support her curious eyes.  
  
“And what about Clarke?” Raven tried again.  
  
“I found the divorce papers on Anya's desk.” she muttered softly. “I went to see Clarke, w-we had a fight and when I went home Anya was there.” she said quickly. “I also had a fight with her, we said some bad things to each other and I yelled at her to leave.”  
  
“I see...” Raven murmured.  
  
“Anya accused me of being selfish and getting everything I want by force.” she continued as if she could not stop. “She kept repeating that I could not blame Clarke for her behavior seeing the horrible way I treated her six years ago and the disgraceful way I stuck her with that contract.”   
  
“Lexa-”  
  
“And she's right, Raven, she's right.” she said, shaking her head. “I behaved like an idiot, I bound her to me six years ago with a wedding and I did the same thing with that contract.” she felt her throat on fire. “And when I found out the truth I got mad, I h-have poured over her all these years of suffering, sacrifice and Clarke did not deserve it.”

“What have you done?”  
  
Lexa shook her head vigorously, she left the cup and began to breathe a little more heavily, a sign that the anxiety was catching her. Immediately Raven's hands found her face, giving her something to focus on and Lexa was lost in her dark eyes.  
  
“It's okay, Lexa, breathe, shh.”  
  
“I did a horrible thing, Rav.” Lexa gasped breathing with difficulty. “I used her, I treated her like an object and I-I-”  
  
“Lexa.” Raven stopped her taking her hand and bringing it to her chest. “Concentrate on my breathing, in and out, in and out, breathe.”  
  
Lexa executed that command and closed her eyes focusing on her breathing, thus escaping at the panic attack that failed to stop at her apartment a few days before. Raven helped her to calm down, watched her eyes brimming with unshed tears and she sighed.  
  
She could not even remember the last time she'd seen Lexa crying and she was sure that she had terribly needed to do it.   
  
“What are you going to do?” she asked. “Will you give her a divorce? Will you let the only woman you loved after all these years escape through your fingers?”   
  
Lexa looked at her intently, her green eyes were the most brilliant green eyes ever.   
  
“Will you let pass another six years, Lexa?” she asked rhetoric. “Will you allow misunderstandings, wrong choices and impulsive actions to put an end to what you feel about her?”  
  
At those words, Lexa was unable to control herself, she let herself go for the first time since her mother died. Tears flooded her cheeks and the sobs began to shake her body, preventing her from breathing regularly.  
  
Raven did the only thing she knew would make her feel better: she hugged her.

She gave her the comfort that she needed so much but she was too proud to ask. At that time she was not Lexa Woods, the owner of a large computer company, a person who made money with a single snap of her fingers and her intelligence.  
  
She was Alexandria, the afraid little girl who had seen her mother die.  
  
She was Alexandria, the young woman who had buried her father and who had to take care of herself.  
  
She was Alexandria, the adult who had seen her fiancée die and who closed her heart to love.

She was Alexandria, the destroyed and lonely person who was in love with an amazing woman.

She was just Alexandria.  
  
  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank all who have understood what I wanted to express with the previous chapter


	15. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for late update :( but I had problems with my computer and work has completely kidnapped me ç_ç  
> I wanted to tell you that the day will change, from Monday to Friday again for work problems. 
> 
> Like always sorry for every mistake. 
> 
> Now, enjoy!

** Chapter 14 **

  
  


She needed it.  
  
She needed it for a long time but  f ear and inadequacy , caused  by the choices she had made, had prevented her more than once to cross that gate, and when she did  a shiver ran down her spine.  
  
She paused just a moment, wrapp ing her fingers around the bouquet of flowers she had in her hands and t aking a deep breath. She felt her throat closed and her eyes were now wet with unshed tears but they would soon g e t down her cheeks.  
  
She began to walk again and every step seemed to resound in her ears  like  mine s w h ile she shortened the distance. She stopped in front of that piece of marble  that was glistening in the early morning light and she smiled at the sight of the letters.

“Hi.” she whispered, kneeling on the ground. “It's been a long time since we last spoke, hmm?” she asked. “I regret not having come before, I couldn't, I hope you can forgive me.” she continued placing the flowers on the ground.  
  
Clarke ran her gaze all around her, noticing the many headstones that stood silent in the cemetery and she smiled sadly, feeling once again guilty for not going to visit her father sooner.  
  
“Happy birthday, Daddy.” she murmured. “I miss you so much.” she continued in a broken voice. The node that closed her throat was enough to allow her to barely breathe. “And I think about you every day, every day, Dad.”  
  
She stopped trying to control her tears; she touched the tombstone and she traced the outlines of his name with the tip of her fingers, smiling slightly while the vivid memory of Jake's face came back to her mind.  
  
His fair hair, his sweet smile and his eyes the same as hers.

She still remembered the loving way Jake had always held her, the way he had always done everything to make her feel safe despite the normal misunderstandings that characterized the adolescent age.  
  
“I feel so alone and lost.” she said. “And I need one of your advices and your embrace. I need to hear you say that everything will be fine and be safe in your arms, Daddy.”   
  
She was silent for a long time, watching the smiling photo of her father, looking at the big golden letters that made up her surname, wondering why for so long she was afraid of going to visit him. She cursed herself for being away for so long.  
  
She did even not bother when slight drizzle began to come down. She put her hands to her face and finally she dropped down all the barriers that she had turned up in those years. Her body started to shaken and the sobs broke the silence of the place, while the memories were beginning to invade her mind.  
 _  
  
  
* Jake's eyes were shining with emotion and they immediately searched for her daughter, who was sat on the couch, her guitar on her legs, playing a little clumsy the chords of their song.  
  
But when she opened her mouth to sing, Jake was enraptured by the beauty of her voice and he took a few steps toward the couch, sitting at her side, his heart filled with love. Jake watched Clarke move her fingers on the strings trying her best to avoid mistakes.  
  
“_ _ **Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together, I just want to stay with you in this moment forever, forever and ever.**_ _”  
  
Jake sang with her, encouraging her with a smile, proud that she had learned to play the guitar alone. Clarke smiled and kept moving her fingers, making sure the tunes were right, her fingertips started to sore from the constant rubbing across the strings.  
  
“_ _ **Don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep 'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing.”**_ _Clarke sang moving her head with the rhythm. “_ _ **'Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing.**_ _”_ _  
  
_ _When she failed to place her finger, Clarke let out a curse and Jake laughed, putting his arm around her to draw her closer and he held her.  
  
_ “ _I've ruined everything.” she complained resting the guitar on the couch.  
  
_ _Jake kissed her forehead with love and shook his head. “It was perfect, little girl, the best gift I've ever received.”  
  
_ _Clarke rolled her eyes, because no matter how many mistakes she could do in her life, for her father she would always be perfect. That was the reason why she always committed herself one hundred percent in what she did: because she wanted to be the daughter who'd have made him proud.  
  
_ _“Happy birthday, Daddy.” she murmured, giving him a light kiss on the cheek. “I promise that I will practice more, next time it will be perfect.”  
  
_ “ _It was already perfect, my love, it was already perfect.” he assured her resting his cheek on her head._

  
  
  
Clarke drummed her fingers on the counter waiting impatiently for her coffee; not that she had something urgent to do but her father's birthday often took out all the bad thoughts that she was capable of removing from her mind most of the time.  
  
She watched the barista preparing her ordination, laughing and chatting with her colleague and Clarke found herself twist her mouth, then she realized the absurdity of her irritation.  
  
“Clarke.” said the girl waving her glass.  
  
Clarke raised her hand to get her attention, she made her way among the people who were at the bar and after having thanked the girl politely, she walked to the table where the sugar was. She glanced at the bar and after finding it too crowded for her taste, she walked through the exit with the desire to satisfy her isolation.  
  
The streets were already crowded with people who were on their way to work and Clarke had the desire to do the same, she wanted to go into her studio, the same studio where she had not set one foot since she'd made love to Lexa - because yes, despite everything, for Clarke it was making love, considering the great feeling she felt for the girl - and she wanted to paint.  
  
Painting to try to chase away the sadness.  
  
Painting to try to make sense of all those feelings that she could not control.  
  
Painting to try to remember the face of her father.  
  
She sighed and took a sip of coffee. When she raised her wrist, her eyes rested on the watch that she used to wear only in that day. It was broken and the time was blocked at the most significant change in her life.  
  
 _ **11:30**_

  
  
 _*Clarke played with the pencil she had in her fingers, watching the teacher write something on the blackboard, something she was not particularly interested in. Her mind was a whirl of thoughts that again and again brought her back to that morning, the discussion she had with her father and the “I hate you” she shouted in anger, before walking out the door.  
  
_ _Clarke did not really think that.  
  
_ _She loved her father more than everything else in the world,_ _he_ _was the most important person in her life but for some strange reason the rejection of that morning had touched her deeply. Maybe_ _it was_ _Jake's cold eyes when he had denied her the permission or the way he became furious when she had tried to insist too much._ _Clarke only knew she had lost her temper, and now, sitting at her desk, she could not help but think of the “I hate you” she had thrown to her father. She sighed and bit her lower lip looking_ _at_ _her phone that was in her shoulder bag, wondering if she should send him a message.  
  
_ _When the teacher called one of her classmates at the blackboard, giving him his full attention, Clarke leaned over to pick up the phone; she could not wait until that night, she needed to apologize. But when her fingers touched the phone, she clearly felt that something was wrong, her heart clenched and her stomach closed instantly. A soft knock on the door made her jump and she dropped the phone, straightening in her chair, while the teacher was going to open the door.  
  
_ “ _Griffin.”The sound of her name forced her to turn toward the door and h_ _er_ _eyes met h_ _er_ _mother, who was staring at her in the doorway.  
  
_ _“Mom?” she murmured softly gathering her things, as if unconsciously she already knew that she would not be back in the classroom.  
  
_ _When the classroom door closed behind her, her mother began to speak, stammering, the tears rolling down her eyes and her father's watch was tight between her fingers, the only thing that Clarke was able to do was collapsing in the hallway and yelling.  
  
  
  
_ Clarke picked up one by one the paint cans, placing them carefully on the table which still bore signs of the passion that had consumed her and Lexa. She had no longer entered into the room for a while and the paint had dried on the large plastic sheets that Clarke used to use to protect the floor. Clarke tilted her head and observed what colors they had created in the plastic sheets, something that, if she tried to do it alone, would not have been made the same way. She could clearly see the signs of their hands, the perfect form of Lexa’s butt, her knees and her hair profile.  
  
Despite that she had to settle the mess that prevailed the room, Clarke could not help but sit cross-legged beside the plastic sheet to observe the colors more closely. She reached out and ran her fingers on the dry color, smiling at the wonderful sensation she felt under her fingertips. That was one of the many reasons why she loved art: the sensation of colors under her fingertips, the way the brushes could create spells and the way the colors were able to produce masterpieces even with the simple weaving of bodies as the one she had in front of her eyes.  
  
She had received a call that morning and, according to Anya, that would have been the last thing that would remain of Lexa, besides the wonderful memories. The next morning she had to go to her office and finally sign the papers.  
  
Lexa was giving her the divorce.  
  
But there were a few details to work out before it could become effective and Clarke did not know how to feel about it. She had spent years hoping to break free of that contract or from that responsibility and now that she was one step away from make it happen, she could not help but think it was the biggest mistake of her life. Bigger even of accepting to marry a perfect stranger.  
  
  
  
 _*Clarke closed the door of her apartment, if one room in a shabby building as that could be described as such, and she took a few steps into the room, looking around. That house was a shack and smelled but it was the only solution that she could afford with her work and she sighed running her hands on her tired face._ _Her eyes lingered on the coat that she still had on her and she could not help herself with her fingers stroking the soft cloth. She bit her lower lip, breathing in the wonderful smell which continued to wrap her. It was an expensive jacket, she could sell it, earning a lot of money for shopping food or, better yet, for the rental...  
  
_ _“Griffin!” a heavy hand knocked three times on the door. Clarke jumped recognizing the voice of the home owner. “I know you're in there, open the door!”  
  
_ _She pursed her lips in an almost painful grip and went to open the door. In front of her there was a man who had so much need of a shower, his greasy hair falling over his forehead, the shirt he was wearing was unbuttoned over a tank top that had definitely seen better days. With all the money he drew from the rents of that rundown place, Clarke wondered why he could not afford some decent clothes.  
  
_ _“Where is my money?” he asked without mince words.  
  
_ “ _I lack sixty dollars for the rental of this month.” she said outspoken. “I will have them by the weekend.”  
  
_ _None of them noticed the hesitant and disgusted person that was going upstairs. Only when she stopped into the hall looking around for something, Clarke knew perfectly well who it was: Alexandria Woods’s lawyer.  
  
_ _“You always give me problems, Griffin.” said the man. “You owe me also a part of the rent of the last month.”  
  
_ “ _I know.” Clarke's eyes were still fixed on the well-dressed woman nearby. W_ _hen Clarke saw her_ _going forward_ _she prayed the lawyer had the decency to remain aloof and not to attend to that painful conversation._ _“I lack sixty dollars to reach the full amount, including the last month.” she replied.  
  
_ “ _If you do not bring it to me in three days, I'll throw you out, do you understand?” he said with disgust. “You bitches are all the same, you think you're special because you're cute? All the same!”  
  
_ _Clarke looked at him impassively, she was not willing to give in: she knew the man's temperament and it was not the first time he addressed to women that way.  
  
_ “ _If you feel so pretty why_ _don’t_ _you try to rise money in other ways?”  
  
_ _That insinuation made Clarke jump and at the same time the lawyer took a step forward, frowning and look_ _ing_ _at them.  
  
_ “ _I said you'll have them.” she replied between her teeth.  
  
_ _“Friday, Griffin, otherwise don't you even bother to come back home, because surely there will be some toxic, he will certainly be more punctual than you.”  
  
_ _The woman took another step forward, her jaw clenched and her eyes o_ _n_ _fire, Clarke knew perfectly well that she was about to step in._ “ _List-” she tried to say.  
  
_ _“I said that you will have them.” Clarke said flat. “And it will be, now, if you don't mind, I would like to use the privacy of my apartment.”  
  
_ “ _As long_ _as_ _you have one.” he said scornfully but he took a step back, glancing at the woman behind him. “Are you lost?” he asked amused. “All the same.” he continued to mutter as he walked away down the hall.  
  
_ _When the man disappeared around the corner, probably to go to claim more money, Clarke pointed her eyes on the woman she had seen a few hours earlier.  
  
_ “ _Thanks for the thought.” she said, breaking the silence and clearly alluding to the discussion. “But I can take care of myself, I don't need anyone to fight my battles.”  
  
_ _Anya stared at her for a long time and with anything but calm voice replied. “Yes, except for the millionaires that present themselves and ask you to get married, offering money in exchange for your signature on a piece of paper.”  
  
Clarke looked down embarrassed and before she could answer, the lawyer went on, as if she could not wait to leave. Seeing the horrible way the entire building and her apartment were reduced, Clarke certainly could not blame her.  
  
_ _“Anyway I did not do it for you but to make sure that my boss’s new wife will not be left without a roof or die of cold, before she cannot take possession of what belongs to her.” s_ _he gave her a look and then pulled out something from the briefcase in her hand. “This is yours, Miss Alexandria wanted the payment to start from today.”  
  
_ _Clarke took the check from her hand and opened her eyes widely to the amount: $2,000.  
  
_ “ _Th-the too muc-much-”  
  
_ _“They're adequate.” she snapped. “When you have a bank account, I_ _will_ _ask you to let me have the details because I'm not going to deliver you the check every month, I'm not your personal postman.” she said. “And please, with this first check, find a place less lousy.” she concluded turning and walking away in the hallway.  
  
The woman didn't even greet her, just like Alexandria had done that morning but Clarke didn't care. She continued to squeeze that piece of paper in her hands and her heart was pounding_ _. S_ _he went back inside the apartment, closing the door with a thud.  
  
_ _Two thousand dollars.  
  
_ _She fell back against the door, gliding along the wood until she touched the floor and closed her eyes, tears running down her face.  
  
_ _Two thousand dollars.  
  
_ _She buried her face in the collar of that expensive coat that she was no longer forced to sell and she cried, letting out all the stress of those tough months. With that money she could begin to live and not survive, even if she would never see the woman who had made that miracle possible.  
  
  
  
_ Although it seemed a dead-end job, Clarke was able to settle the studio and to keep in a safe place the plastic sheet. The time had gone quickly and she was not displeased that much, she really needed to fill those hours as fast as possible. She had ordered a pizza because she forgot to have lunch and when someone knocked on the door, she hoped it was the delivery boy but when she saw Raven through the glass, she found herself to frown in confusion.  
  
“Raven, what are you doing here?” she asked.  
  
“I intercepted the delivery guy on the street.” she replied with a smile. “So I decided to do it myself, surprise!”  
  
Those words did not explain the reason why she was there but Clarke stepped aside to let her pass, shutting the door of the locked gallery. Raven looked around admired, watching the paintings hanging on the wall with evident interest.  
  
“You're an extraordinary artist, Clarke, really.” she said, giving her the pizza box.  
  
“Thank you.” she replied with an embarrassed smile, but Clarke still did not understand why she was there.  
  
Clarke did not have time to ask her, Raven turned toward her, on her face an expression that Clarke had never seen: a serious and professional one.  
  
“I know that Anya has called you this morning.” she began. “And she told you about Lexa's decision.”  
  
Clarke nodded silent and made her way to the gallery, ready to move the conversation in the privacy of her studio. She was sure that Raven was aware of those details because her and Anya seemed to share everything, but Clarke still did not understand the reasons for Raven's visit. She set the pizza on the table and opened it, as she went to get something to drink. Raven did not waste time to sit on one of the chairs and looked around curiously.  
  
“So it seem that you need a lawyer.” Raven said when Clarke came back with two beers.  
  
“Why do I need a lawyer?” she asked in confusion, sitting in front of her.  
  
Raven took a slice of pizza giving it a generous bite. “You need to have someone to represent you in the negotiating.” she illustrated. "Somebody that makes your interests, protecting you and here I am!”"  
  
Clarke stared at her with more confusion. "Why do I need someone? I do not need to negotiate at all.” she said. “And what's that to do with you?”  
  
“I'm offering to be your lawyer.” Raven explained. “I'm offering, for free, to assist you in the divorce.”  
  
“Are you a lawyer?” she asked shocked.  
  
Raven looked like everything except a lawyer, she had never suggested to practice the profession and seen her passion for cars, Clarke had assumed that her job had something do to with cars.  
  
“Yes, Clarke, I'm a lawyer.” she repeated. “And I'm willing to help you if you'd let me.”  
  
Clarke was silent for a long moment, wondering why Raven wanted to help her, especially since her wife was Lexa's lawyer from pretty much her entire life  
  
“But Anya-”  
  
“It's not the first time that me and Anya find ourselves in the same court.” Raven assured. “We're very professional, in fact, to wage war on sounds of big words and amendments it's quite sexy.” she continued with a grin.  
  
“Raven...” Clarke began closing her eyes for a moment. “Thank you for the offer but I don't need a lawyer. If Lexa decided to sign the papers, I don't think I need a lawyer.”  
  
“That's where you're wrong.” she pointed out. “You're her wife and as such you have the right to a portion of her assets, so you need someone to help you to receive them.”  
  
Clarke opened her eyes and stared at her almost incredulous at the words. She did not want anything, all she wanted was to go back a few weeks ago and tell the truth to Lexa, to drop her fear and to do the right thing. She did not want her money, she never ever really wanted them, even when she agreed to marry her.  
  
It was enough to get lost in her needy green eyes to make that decision.  
  
“I don't want anything...” Clarke whispered with her closed throat. “I never ever wanted anything from her.” she continued in a whisper.  
  
Just Lexa’s consideration or even her love. But she did not say those words aloud, she preferred to keep them to herself, hiding them in the folds of her soul, as she had always done.  
  
  
 _  
*Clarke closed the gate behind her, she adjusted her shoulder strap, as she slipped the donut in her mouth, walking in the busy street, mingling in the crowd. She took a couple of bites, as she looked to the watch on her wrist considering if she had time to stop and have a coffee before college. She ran a hand through her hair and she nearly hit a man who came from the opposite side, managing to dodge it at the last second with a swing on herself. When she did it, her eyes instinctively made their way on something very familiar across the road and she froze.  
  
It could not be...  
  
_ _She licked her lips and ended up in a hurry her donut, she crossed the street, watching the car in the mid time. The closer she got, more clearly she could see what had caught her eye.  
  
_ _Alexandria Woods was staring at her from every side of the large newsstand that was located in the intersection.  
  
_ _Even if only in pictures, those green eyes seemed to hollow right into the soul, just as had happened six months before at the diner, six months in which Clarke had not stopped thinking about her for a moment._ _To Clarke it seemed only yesterday when Lexa had crossed the door of the diner and married her, promising, in a particular way, to provide for her. After the first check delivered by hand by her lawyer, Clarke had received the payment every month and this had allowed her to pick up her life.  
  
_ _“Hey, this is not a library.” the man said, looking at her with a frown. “Or you buy it or you put it back down.”  
  
_ _It was then that Clarke realized she had grabbed the magazine. “Y-yes, I'm sorry.” she took the wallet in the shoulder bag and handed him the money, not paying much attention to their amount.  
  
_ _Before the man could give her_ _the change_ _, Clarke walked over to the bus stop, her eyes staring at those green irises_ _that were_ _so cold and sad. She could not hold back_ _her_ _finger_ _that_ _began to fondle those features that seemed to be painted by one of the painters Clarke had been studying and she felt her heart beating wildly.  
  
_ _ **“ Alexandria Woods, the new CEO of the Woods Corporation, is not just a pretty face: the company is on the top of the Stock Market."  
  
**_ _A small smile appeared on Clarke's lips, that meant that Lexa had managed to take the family company as she wished. Clarke leaned against the bus shelter and began to browse through the magazine, going in search of the article._  
  
  
  
Saying that Clarke was exhausted, was an understatement.  
  
After spending all day at the gallery trying to work, Clarke had given up and had gone for a walk in the center. She took another coffee and sat in the park to observe people walking, in search of inspiration that seemed to have disappeared into thin air. On the way back she stopped at one of her favorite sushi restaurants and had dinner alone, playing with her father's watch, bringing back memories over memories. Clarke had thought of her parents, both of her parents, wondering how was her mother.  
  
Clarke did not take a taxi, she walked up to her apartment, she had showered and finally, weary and emotionally exhausted, she had dropped on the bed. Not long after the thoughts of what was waiting for her the next day started to fill her mind. The noise of the phone vibrating on the bedside table caught her attention and she leaned to grab it, since Raven had assured her that she would send her a few tips for the divorce. Quickly she read the text and sighed heavily, in a vague attempt to calm herself.  
  
Clarke would see Lexa again after what had happened and she was not sure she was ready. She dropped her head on the pillow, putting the phone on the bedside table and her eyes rested on the sketchbook she had pulled out of the box, that remained in her closet the day when she pulled out Lexa's coat, which was leaning on the chair by the window.  
  
She bit her lower lip undecided, she knew what was in that sketchbook and she was not sure she wanted to rehash old memories, but she failed to stop her hand. She opened it and her heart did a somersault, when she met the sketched face: a pair of green irises, a perfect nose and adorable ears. She smiled sadly, her eyes grew moist instantly and Clarke stroked with her fingertips the lines that she had created so many years ago and suddenly the inspiration that seemed to have stopped was unlocked instantly.  
  
  
  
 _*Clarke watched the crowd a little bit bored, thinking that perhaps her boyfriend's words were not so wrong. Trying to sell her work on the street maybe was not the best way to make herself known but she was convinced that she would have to start somewhere. There were people who stopped to admire her works, sometimes they bought, sometimes they simply made her compliments. Clarke was still studying and trying to finish university as soon as possible, but that was a good starting point.  
  
But there were days like this, in which Clarke would have preferred to stay happily at home, perhaps lying on the couch in the arms of her boyfriend, watching something on television. She sighed deeply and when she heard the phone ringing in the bag, she immediately felt refreshed to the idea that Finn was calling her to find out how she was.  
_ _  
_ _Finn was a sweet boy, and, despite the initial fear, Clarke had decided to give him a chance._ _She had not repented, Finn loved her, he treated her with respect and intimacy was not bad._ _He_ _made her feel safe, Finn cuddled her and protected her, that was basically all that Clarke had always wanted.  
  
She leaned over to grab the phone and in __doing so_ _all the brushes that she had placed on the stool, fell on the asphalt, producing a dull sound._ “ _Damn!” she cursed grabbing the phone and pressing the green button, placing it between the shoulder and ear. “Hello?”  
  
  
_ _Lexa held the phone tight between her fingers, looking around frantically, while the person on the other side, explained in detail all the reasons why she had to give her an opportunity to become a member of her society. She was not listening, she was looking for the shop that sold the best wine she had ever drunk, wanting to buy a few bottles for a working dinner that evening. She needed everything to go the right way: her Uncle Titus would be present and she wanted to show the wonderful work she was doing in running the family business.  
  
Yes, it seems an interesting proposal, why aren’t you-” she stopped mid-sentence when her feet trod on something hard.  
  
_ _She looked down and she saw the bristles of a brush appear from under her shoe and she raised her brows confused. When she turned around, she drowned in colors and perfectly drawn shapes: paintings._ _Those paintings were wonderful and for some reason she could not explain why but she was completely fascinated. She looked around for the author of what, to her eyes, looked like masterpieces and she caught a glimpse of blonde hair cover a woman's face.  
  
“Miss Alexandria, I found it, over here!” Adam's voice came from the crowd of people, even overhanging the person talking on the phone.  
  
_ _I'm coming!” she said, placing a hand on the microphone and walking a few steps away from the girl. “Okay, Miss Anderson, I invite you to call my secretary and make an appointment. It would be better to talk about in person and at the moment I cannot give you the proper attention.”  she threw a last glance at the paintings and decided to go back to buy some in the following days.  
  
  
Clarke turned sharply at the sound of that voice that had obsessed her over the past two years. She collided with curly hair she remembered too well, she watched the expensive clothes that bandaged that beautiful body and she found herself gasping when she saw that profile, the perfect nose, the full lips and the hint of a small ear peeping out from those brown hair.  
  
_ _For a second she found herself out of breath, Finn, still waiting on the phone, shook her. When Clarke tried to open her mouth to speak, to say the name that was still burned into her soul, the woman walked away. Clarke felt something inside her cracking in two, something she could not explain but she was sure it would not come back in its place. Clarke greeted Finn and she kept observing Lexa walk away into the crowd. Her hand, as having her own life, she opened the sketchbook that she always carried with her. She found a profile, a pair of green eyes and a nose, she bit her lower lip and grabbed the pencil ready to add more details.  
  
_  
****

  
Seeing Lexa in those circumstances, it was not like she had expected in the past days. Seeing her eyes cold and sad again, it was something that she should have been prepared for but it did not stop her from feeling her heart shaking. She swallowed and played with the hem of the blouse she was wearing, trying to keep herself busy while they were waiting for Anya, who had been called urgently by one of her collaborators.  
  
“Do you want something to drink?” Raven asked trying to dampen the tension but Clarke just shook her head.  
  
Anya made her entrance into the room a few minutes later with a couple of folders in her hands, she took a seat next to Lexa, implying that they could begin. Raven opened her file by pulling out a pair of papers.  
  
“Lexa has already signed the divorce papers.” Anya snapped, pushing a paper on the table.  
  
Clarke felt her heart skip a beat when her eyes met Lexa's elegant signature alongside hers and she had to close her eyes to regain control of herself.  
  
Raven took the paper and examined it critically “There are some details to discuss.” she said quietly. “Such as the separation of assets.”  
  
“That does not exist, they are asking for call off the wedding.”  
  
Lexa sighed heavily and put her hand on the lawyer's arm to get her attention. “Divorce.” she said slowly.  
  
“Marriage has not been consummated an-” Anya stopped and instinctively raised her right eyebrow. Lexa remained impassive but when the lawyer looked back at Clarke and she saw her embarrassed look, she realized. “Oh.” that was the only thing she could say.  
  
Raven instead smiled and shook her head. “Well, in that case, I would say to start talking about what it is up to Clarke.”  
  
Clarke raised her head. “Rav-”  
  
Raven raised her hand to stop her, willing to bargain to the best of her ability all that could have gone to the benefit of her customer. “These papers require a divorce and not the cancellation, here where you can clearly see the signature of my client.” Raven illustrated, pushing the paper on the table. “But since there was no prenuptial agreement.” she continued, starting to read the list she had written. “To my client it would be responsible for half of Mrs. Wood’s heritage but Mrs. Griffin is very magnanimous and she decided to settle for a quarter of the heritage and 5% of actions-”   
  
“This is totally absurd.” Anya protested.  
  
“I have not finished yet” Raven said, annoyed by the interruption of the other woman. Clarke looked at Lexa's face that was darkening with every word and she found herself swallowing. “She wants to continue with the monthly payment and...” Raven turned the page of the booklet in front of her. “And she wants the house in Australia.”  
  
Lexa raised an eyebrow and Clarke wanted to disappear instantly: she did not even know that her wife owned a house in Australia.  
  
“And-”  
  
“The lady does not believe that it is enough?” Anya asked to say the least amused.  
  
“I said she was magnanimous.” Raven said amused. “And then she wants the Jaguar XK140.”  
  
Lexa's eyes lit immediately at those words. “She cannot have the car.” she said immediately.  
  
Raven stared at her intently. “Well, then you will be willing to grant her the Aston Martin db5.”  
  
“She will not get any of my cars.” Lexa said through clenched teeth. “Are not all her claims enough?”  
  
“I do not want any of your cars.” Clarke said. “In fact, to be honest, I don't want anything from you, I want to leave this room as quickly as possible.”  
  
“Me too.” Lexa said. “I have important commitments to attend, I cannot waste my time on futile things.”  
  
Clarke shook her jaws at those words and her wounded pride took over. “It didn't seem to bother you putting aside your important commitments when you forced me to spend a week in your company.”  
  
Anya tried to speak to end the discussion before it went out of hand to both but she saw Raven shaking her head and she remained silent. It was what they both needed: if something that had happened had brought them to such a breaking point, they had to solve it, one way or another.  
  
“It did not seem to bother you either, being scamper in first class throughout Europe.” she said, raising her voice.  
  
“And you did not mind treating me like an annoying thing! An object to take and use as you wished!” Clarke said angrily. “You did it six years ago and you did it last week, throwing the money on me like I'm one of those women that you usually entertain yourself with!”  
  
Lexa clenched her jaw and tried to control herself, not wanting to talk about those private things in the presence of Anya and Raven, at least not in those circumstances.  
  
“That was a mistake which will be discussed at another time and especially in private.”  
  
“What was a mistake? Having sex with me or throwing at me a bundle of notes?”  
  
“ _What have you done_?” Anya asked sp inning around, horrified by her words.  
  
Lexa put her hands on the table, ready to argue, eager to continue the confrontation that had waited during that long week.  
  
“Maybe we should all take a break.” Raven said trying to calm the waters but Clarke had uncovered the Pandora's box and she did not seem keen to close it again at least not so soon.  
  
“You have kept paying me for all these years and not even once you had the balls to show yourself again!”  
  
“I repeat: You did not seem so sorry for that monthly money.” Lexa said. “You've graduated, you opened your gallery, you got what you wanted.”  
  
“I agreed because I was desperate, is that what you want to hear, Lexa?” Clarke asked, lowering her voice. “That I was doing a job I hated, I was living in a horrible apartment and I needed the money for the rent? Okay, yes, then you're right, I didn't mind.” she continued. “Most of the money that you sent me have been dormant, I send them to you if that's what you want, because, as I said before, I do not want anything from you, not anymore!”  
  
“All right, I think that-” Raven began.  
  
Lexa held up a hand to stop her, she could feel a lump in her throat that almost prevented her from breathing and her eyes were on Clarke. “Leave us.” she simply said.  
  
Anya and Raven exchanged a brief look of understanding and stood up almost simultaneously, heading for the door. They watched the two women, sitting at opposite sides of the table, staring like two caged animals.  
  
“They need it.” Raven whispered.  
  
Anya grimaced. “I know.” she agreed. “I hope Clarke ends quickly with her, because I have a great desire to kick her ass.” she said as she slowly closed the door.  
  
“Clarke-”  
  
“Save it, Lexa.” she said coldly. “I don't want nothing of what Raven has listed, nothing.” she made it clear. “I want you to sign the papers and we leave all this behind us.”   
  
Lexa was silent for a long moment, finally she ran her hands through her hair completely exhausted. It was a life that she fought against everything and everyone, she knew it could be exhausting and she did not want Clarke to feel the same way.  
  
“If that's what you want.” she whispered. “If that's what you want.” she repeated again, leaning forward to grab the papers that Raven had put in the center of the table and she pulled out the pen from her pocket.  
  
Clarke stared at Lexa that was quickly reading, before signing in the space reserved for her and when she did, she was unable to prevent herself to stand up, clenching her fists at her sides.  
  
“You're finally free, Clarke.” she said putting away her pen.  
  
Lexa saw Clarke putting her hands to her face and she raised an eyebrows confused: she was sure that that was what Clarke had wanted from the first moment she had entered in her gallery.  
  
“I don't want anything back.” she continued softly.  
  
“Shut up.” Clarke whispered, shaking her head.  
  
“You can keep the money and-”  
  
“Shut up!” Clarke thundered, spinning around.  
  
Lexa was silent, unable to understand the reason for that behavior and stared at her for a long time.  
  
“You have not the right to speak! You don't know what I want or what I need!” Clarke snapped. “You don't know anything! You think you know everything but you're wrong, Alexandria Woods. We have spent a week together but you don't know me at all!”  
  
Lexa stood up in turn, tired of being used as a punching bag, even though she knew she deserved it, but she would never put her head down. “So, what the hell do you want from me, Clarke?” she asked impatiently.  
  
“I've never wanted your money, Lexa, never!” she said, turning suddenly and pointing a finger at her chest. “I've always wanted you in my life...” she continued trying to control the trembling of her voice. “I never wanted a divorce, I just wanted you by my side.”  
  
Lexa gulped and took a step forward. “Clarke, I-” she stopped not sure what she wanted to say.  
  
"For someone so intelligent, you're just dumb, Lexa.” Clarke snapped. “And maybe it was better that way.” she continued. “We belong to two completely different worlds, we see life with different eyes.”  
  
Clarke waited for Lexa to say something, anything that would show at least she was partly interested, but when she saw Lexa cashing those words silently she received her answer. Tears began to flow down her cheeks, wetting the collar of her blouse: Clarke ran a hand over her eyes and shook her head.  
  
Lexa opened her mouth to speak but no sound came out. Lexa stared motionless at Clarke gather her things and grab almost angrily the signed document, before marching out the door. Lexa looked out and clearly felt her heart cracking, she watched those blonde hair walk away from the hall. She closed her eyes, putting a hand to her chest and trying to take control of her emotions but she did not have time because she heard footsteps.  
  
“What the hell have you done?” Anya thundered without a minimum of respect.  
  
Lexa felt her heart beating in her ears, blood pressure rising and she blinked a few times, as if she could not see the person in front of her. She swallowed and felt her stomach revolting, while in her mind there was only one thing: Clarke.  
  
“Lexa, I'm talking to you! You're going to throw everything down the toilet or you finally take responsibility for your ac-”  
  
“I have to go.” Lexa said softly hurrying toward the door. “I must...”  
  
She needed to talk to Clarke, she needed to explain herself, she needed to find her...

 


	16. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I promised, here the chapter.
> 
> As always, sorry for any mistakes.

**Chapter 15**

  
  
Raven kept her eyes on the road. She could clearly feel her wife's nervousness without never needing to look at her. Raven knew exactly what was going through Anya's head and, despite the fact that after her discussion with  Lexa , Raven had promised that she would  no longer  interfer e in their  relationship , c uriosity was stronger than anything.   
  
Raven had seen her talking to Lexa before the meeting that morning; she had remained to watch from the large office windows, when she had seen them hug ging , she understood that they had made clear their disagreement. Raven was fully aware of the stubbornness of both sides and for days she had feared that the long friendship , that had bound them for so many years, could crumble. On the other hand, the affection, devotion and respect that united them, were something difficult to ignore.   
  
But she was sure in that moment Anya wanted to jump on Lexa's  n e ck in anger.

“If you keep grinding your teeth in this way, you may not be able to use them to eat your dinner.” Raven said ironically, trying to break the tension in the car.  
  
Anya turned to face her, her arms crossed on her chest. “I'm pissed off.” she said, as if that was the only explanation Raven needed.

“I know.” Raven said. “But you cannot do anything to help, An.” she pointed out. “"We have taken the situation in our hands for their own good and we did everything we could, now it's up to them.”  
  
Anya muttered something between her teeth and turned her head toward the window, watching the cars that were moving in the other direction as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

“Come on, baby.” Raven laughed, stopping at red lights. This gave her the opportunity to slide her hand on Anya's thigh. “In the only night we finish work at a decent time, you want to pout instead of taking advantage of it?”  
  
Anya looked down at her wife's hand and Raven squeezed the thigh forcefully, before scratching it with sensuality.

“Rav...” she murmured softly. “You promised me that you would have taken me to dinner.”  
  
“I know...” she replied flirtatiously. “But all that talk with aggressive tones and hard looks have done nothing but turn me on.” she confessed, her hand moved toward her inner thigh.  
  
“I was promised a dinner.” Anya remarked with a raised eyebrow and a small smile on her lips.  
  
“You'll have your dinner.” she promised. “But you know... we have not used Eleonor yet.” she said, pointing to the car. “And that shirt you're wearing drives me crazy.”  
  
Anya bit her lower lip when Raven's hand crept upward. Her eyes turned towards her wife and she saw the glint that always characterized them when she wanted to play with her.  
  
“Fuck the dinner.” Anya snapped.

Raven laughed and when the lights changed, the car began to move skidding along the way.  
  
  
****  
  
Clarke had run.

She had run faster than was humanly possible and she had not cared to know if Lexa had followed her or not. Her mind was a whirl of thoughts that violently struggled with what her heart was sa ying , mixing to a prosperous dose of sadness and anger.  She was angry with Lexa for not being able to say a single word. She was angry with herself for having confessed her feelings, and that  that would allow Lexa to keep her even more in her hand than she already  did.

And she was sad.   
  
S he was s ad  because she cared so much, even after all these years, even after everything that had happened between them, and even after the way her wife had behaved towards her. Clarke sighed heavily and looked around, she had walked aimlessly for hours and she had no idea where she was. She jumped as  a  thunder ripped through the sky and she shivered in the cold that hit  her bare skin. 

When she realized where she was, Clarke had to keep herself from laughing hysterically in front of the irony of the situation. She did not come back to that place for six years and her instincts had led her right there.

She closed her eyes when the first drops of rain hit her face.  
  
  
  
Lexa put her hands in her pocket and looked up at the sky, watching the gray clouds, wh ich were preparing to release  a  definitely big storm and she sighed deeply. She had gone to  Clarke's gallery, but she had found it closed and there was no sign of the girl in the darkness that enveloped the stud io . After being unable to convince Anya to give her Clarke's address, Lexa had tried her apartment, but even there she did not have much luck. She had been waiting for a few hours;  in the end, exhausted, she had decided to go away.   
  
She had decided to spend the night at Costia 's , in a vague attempt to feel less alone and after parking the car, she planned to take a little detour. She knew that it  probably was not a good idea, jump ing head in the past would not had other effects tha n make her feel even more badly, especially after the fight she had had with Clarke just hours before, but she needed to get back to where it all started.  
  
Lexa pushed the door open and was surprised to find that diner , that once had been left to itself, in the best conditions. Not too much, but it was a start. She walked to the counter and ordered a cup of coffee, just like that night, and a cappuccino before sigh ing of relief when she found her empty table.   
  
She  waited patiently for her order and watched the rain begin to fall, she heard in her mind again and again the words that Clarke had thrown on her and she swallowed hard, cursing herself for her inability to show her feelings in words. If she had spoken, if she had responded, maybe at that time things would  have be en different.  The waitress arrived a few seconds later and slid the two cups in front of her, giving her a little smile, that Lexa reluctantly returned, while stretching a ten-dollar bill.

“You can keep the change.” she said.  
  
The girl thanked her and walked away quickly, leaving her alone, Lexa reached for two bags of sugar and cinnamon, pouring so much that the foam of her cappuccino disappeared. She smiled slightly and braced herself, determined to see why Clarke liked it so much sweet. When she took a sip of cappuccino, she found herself turn up and shook her head: it was disgusting.  
  
“Oh, Clarke...” she muttered incredulously grabbing her coffee and praying that it helped her to take off the nauseous taste from her mouth.  
  
  
Clarke would not have gone there, she knew she was making a mistake, going there would lead her into a whirlwind of thoughts from her past that would haunt her for months, but her feet had not stopped. Her feet had brought her in front of the diner she had hated from the beginning, but which nevertheless had given her an opportunity to survive, at least until Lexa had not come into her life.  
  
Clarke still remembered when she had spoken with her boss and helped him find another girl, then, without a second thought, she was gone, determined to start college. Clarke sighed in front of the room and her eyes turned towards the inside of the room, while the rain had begun to fall incessantly.  
  
Her heart jumped in her throat when she recognized a person through the glass, right at the table that had marked the most significant moment of her life.  
  
  
  
When Lexa looked up from the cup she had in her hands, she seemed to see something familiar beyond the large window and she had to blink a couple of times to make sure she was not imagining it.  
  
“Clarke.”she whispered incredulous and before she could even think, she rose to her feet ready to reach her.

She walked the distance that separated her from the door, coming under the pouring rain, and she began to look frantically around.  
  
Had she lost her mind? Had she begun to see Clarke everywhere?

But the figure that was moving rapidly down the sidewalk could not be misunderstood. Lexa began to run toward her, not wanting Clarke to disappear. She was not able to speak, to express her feelings but she was ready to try for Clarke, for their wedding but above all, for herself. She wanted to make amends for what she had done. She wanted to show Clarke how much she cared for her. She wanted to show her which were her feelings. She wanted to earn her forgiveness.  
  
“Clarke!” she called out loud. “Please, Clarke, stop!” the girl did not stop, indeed, she walked faster and Lexa followed her example. “Please, we need to talk!” 

She froze when Clarke spun around, her lips tight in a hard grip, her eyes  were  red and her body  was trembling because of the cold.

“What?” she asked in a hard voice.  
  
Lexa instinctively approached her and, without thinking twice, draped her coat over her shoulders, a gesture of stupid gallantry since her coat and Clarke were thoroughly wet.

“Lex-”  
  
“I'm not good with words, Clarke.” she interrupted. “I'm not able to speak, I'm not able to express what I feel and when I try, I always do a lot of mistakes.” she continued. “I did not think all those things I said, Clarke. I feel a worm for doing that horrible gesture, I'll never forgive myself for it. But unfortunately I'm impulsive, stubborn and yes, even obtuse.”  
  
At those words, Clarke could not help but laugh, shaking her head and she jumped when Lexa took her hand and raised it to her own chest, over her heart. Clarke stared at her but she still managed to feel the warm of Lexa's skin and the frantic beat of her heart under the wet fabric of her shirt.

“I have done and I am doing a lot of bad choices." she went on in a broken voice. “I've regretted a lot in my life, Clarke, but this, you and me, is not one of them.”  
  
Clarke could feel her heart beating faster and faster with every word and she did not know what to think. She had been waiting to hear those words for so long, she'd imagine, dreamed and even cried in the solitude of her room and now... now, after all that had happened, after all that she had spilled on her just hours before, Lexa was finally speaking.

“Lexa... I -”

“I'm not good with words, Clarke.” she repeated again. “But let me prove it with facts...” she said, taking a step forward, sticking her head. “Let me prove it...” she continued in a breath brushing her lips with hers in a gentle caress.  
  
Lexa did not kiss her completely, that was just a way to make it clear to the girl that she was willing to try, she would do everything to show her that she could be a different person, the person Clarke had always thought she was. She sighed surprisingly when Clarke's hand left her chest and crawled to her neck, holding her close and allowing her to share that first real kiss that she had denied her six years earlier.  
  
It was the most amazing thing Lexa had ever experienced in her life, Clarke's lips moved slightly on her and it was so gentle and so sweet that she felt her heart melting for the sweetness of that touch. And just as it began, it ended, Clarke pulled back, breathing hard, bright eyes and her face still wet from the rain that had not stopped a moment to come upon them.  
  
“We still have so many things to talk about, Lexa.” she whispered, her forehead pressed on hers, her nose slightly touching Lexa's nose.  
  
“I know.” she murmured. “And I want to but you have to teach me, Clarke, because I do not know how...” she confessed, vulnerable as she ever was.  
  
Clarke found herself closing her eyes for a moment and she shivered in the cold, feeling Lexa's arms instinctively tighten her.  
  
“Let me take you to a warm and dry place.” she whispered and Clarke just nodded.

  
****  
  
Clarke sighed softly, watching her reflection in the mirror, before continuing to brush her hair still slightly wet from the shower. When she had set foot in that apartment, that was not far from the diner, Clarke had not taken long to figure out to whom it belonged, especially thanks to the photos that lined every corner of the house.   
  
For a moment she felt out of place, as if she was not right to set foot in that house. Lexa had escorted her to the apartment and showed her the bathroom, giving her the necessary she needed to take a hot shower and a change of her wet clothes. While she was under the water jet, Clarke had tried to shed light on everything that had happened that day. She and Lexa definitely needed to talk, to clarify, to explain to each other their reasons.  
  
But what would this have resulted in?   
  
Was she really willing to leave everything behind and to pick up where they left off?   
  
Did she want to give Lexa the chance that Lexa had not wanted six years before?  
  
She was still wondering about that while staring at herself in the mirror, tired eyes and wet hair. She bit her lower lip and she realized that she could not stay shut in that bathroom all evening, that Lexa was waiting for her and their chat as well. Clarke sighed heavily and, after finding the force, she left the bathroom, making her way down the hall and entering the living room. Lexa was sitting at the table, staring at the cup in front of her with wet hair tied back in a ponytail. When she entered in the room, the woman looked at her instinctively standing up and, slightly embarrassed, she pointed to the chair in front of her.  
  
“I wanted to make you something warm.” she began. “But I did not know if you would go for a tea or a coffee...”  
  
Clarke smiled slightly. “A coffee will be fine, thank you."  
  
Lexa nodded and after passing a hand through her hair, she walked to the kitchen, leaving her alone again with her thoughts. Clarke took her time to look around, walking through the living room and smiling slightly when her eyes met the various photographs which portrayed a young and carefree Lexa. And she saw Costia: a beautiful girl with dark hair and brown eyes, sweet smile and eyes full of love.  
  
The photo that struck her most was one that represented Lexa and Costia laughing, their faces covered with color and they wore racing suits. Clarke found herself smiling at the happiness that could be seen painted on their faces. Lexa must have loved her very much and again a sense of inadequacy caught her at the thought of being in that apartment so full of happy memories.   
  
What had happened between her and Lexa was not happy and she did not want to tarnish the happiness with unhappiness that had characterized their union until then. She knew deep inside that what had happened between her and Lexa was not only suffering: she even remembered some wonderful moments in her company, all lived in that wonderful week they spent together.  
  
“Here.” Lexa's voice startled her from her thoughts.  
  
Clarke turned to her and sat composedly on the sofa, watching Lexa reach her and lean her cup and sugar on the table. Clarke leaned over to pour the sugar into the black liquid and Lexa put her hand behind her head, a little bit embarrassed.  
  
“I have no cinnamon.” she said softly, sitting down in the chair opposite to the couch. “I do not use it and this house has been closed for quite some time.”  
  
Clarke could not hold back a small amused laugh and maybe a little ironic. “The fact that you remember the cinnamon, makes me realize that the past week together was not a total waste of time.”  
  
“Clarke...” Lexa sighed. “I... I'm sorry for what I said and above all for what I did.” she said softly. “But as I told you before, I do not regret anything that happened between us, _anything._ ”  
  
“I believe you, Lexa, really, just-”  
  
“I know, I know.” she said immediately looking down.  
  
There was a long moment of silence, Lexa did not seem willing to add anything else and Clarke was playing with her spoon.  
  
“What do you regret?” Clarke asked in a whisper, too curious to be able to control herself.  
  
“Not to have looked for you, for starters.” she began with a sad smile. “Not to be able to answer you this morning in the office.” she continued. “And for hurting you, for harming...” and she touched with the tip of her fingers a scratch that was visible on Clarke's legs thanks to the shorts she had lent her.  
  
Clarke swallowed, watching the hand that had been able to take her with such passion, caressing her like a rare flower. “Why did you come to the diner looking for me?” Clarke asked curious.  
  
Lexa could not help but giggle. “I came to the gallery and I have not found you; then I went to your apartment and I waited for you until I assumed that clearly you did not want to be found.” Lexa saw the girl looking down at her mug. “So I decided to come here, because in a way I did not want to be alone and I made a detour, I wanted to sit down at the table where everything started and devour me with guilt.”  
  
Clarke smiled at those words and shook her head. “It's exactly the same reason why I was there.” she confessed.  
  
“It was the only place where we were both sincere for the first time.” she blew.  
  
“Yeah, it's true.”  
  
Lexa looked down shyly. “But I would like to think there are other opportunities.” she pointed out. “I want to open myself, I want you to know me, I really want to.”  
  
Clarke stared at her intently, trying to seize on her face all the emotions that she could: she loved those green irises, because despite Lexa was not good with words, she was able to express any more intense feeling with her own eyes.  
  
“Okay...” she murmured. “Why didn’t you look for me, Lexa?” she asked.  
  
Lexa finally pulled away her hand from her thigh and sighed heavily, trying to gather her thoughts. She had promised to Clarke that she would have talked to her, that she would have told her about all that weighed her heart and she meant it but talking about some things still ached.  
  
“Because when my mother died, for me it was just an inexorable decline into the oblivion and things have gotten worse with Costia's death and my father...” she said in a small voice. “I had become an intolerant person, I could not feel emotions, I had closed my heart to anything and above all to love.”  
  
Clarke took a sip of coffee, just to have something to keep her busy and she allowed the hot liquid to warm her body, looking for the warmth that she wanted to take from Lexa instead.  
  
“And even if I had looked for you, Clarke, I would have destroyed you.” she confessed. “I wasn't good, I would have taken only what I wanted, giving nothing in return and I would have destroyed you.”  
  
Clarke knew exactly what Lexa was trying to tell her, it had been one of the reasons why giving Finn the opportunity to be with her had been harder than she had expected. The fear of destroying him, to hurt him, had prevented her for months to even look at him, so she understood perfectly the girl's words.  
  
“And then with what courage could I introduce myself to you after I practically forced you to marry me?” she asked ironically. “No matter how selfish and stupid it may be, I really believed that helping you with my money would have been enough.”  
  
“You have not forced me to do anything.” Clarke pointed. “I have accepted, I was as desperate as you were.”  
  
“But you healed me.” Lexa said, staring her intensely. “It sounds like a cliché, but it is true.”  
  
Clarke opened her mouth to speak but Lexa raised her hand to stop her: she had opened the box that had contained her heart for so long and she did not want to stop.  
  
“I know that it all started in an abnormal way, with the constriction to spend a week with me and everything else but it was the stupidest and at the same time better decision that I ever made.” she got up from her chair to go to sit at her side. “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Clarke... yo-you m-make me feel.” she took her hand and raised it to her chest, as she had done only an hour before in the rain. “You make my heart beat, you give me emotions, you make me feel wanted, you make me want to be better.”  
  
“Lexa...” Clarke whispered brokenly, she was doing her best to hold back the tears.  
  
“And I want to be better, for the first time in years I want to be better.” she murmured, her heart was beating so fast that Lexa could hear it in her ears. “For you... for us but especially for me. You make me better, Clarke, let me prove it to you, let me show you the kind of woman I am.” she swallowed the lump in her throat. “And the kind of woman that I can become.”  
  
She stared at her intently, letting her eyes do the rest and when Clarke pulled her hand away from her, she knew it was over. Lexa lowered her face, her eyes wet and her stomach twisted but she tried to control herself.  
  
It was over.  
  
Lexa had opened her heart, she had shown her vulnerability and she had not been enough. She could not blame Clarke for not believing her words: seeing the way she had behaved, it would have been strange otherwise. Suddenly, Lexa felt the warm hands on her cheeks, finding herself drowning in those blue eyes that were always able to make her shiver and then Clarke's lips were on hers.  
  
It was a gentle kiss but at the same time sensual, full of things unsaid and promises. Lexa sighed on her lips and relaxed, while Clarke drew closer, opening the door of her heart that she had closed, letting all the feeling pour out. It was dangerous, she knew it, but she wanted to suffer and say she had tried, rather than not having tried at all. Clarke kissed Lexa with all the love and adoration she felt for her and received the same. But when the kiss began to get deeper, more eager, Clarke pulled away and rubbed her nose against hers.  
  
“Show me.” she muttered on her lips. “I want you to show me, Lexa.”  
  
And Lexa smiled before kissing her again.  
  
  
  
They sat on the couch for an interminable time, the passionate kisses turned into brushing against the lips, until they found themselves stretched out face-to-face only to stare at each other. Lexa was playing with a strand of blonde hair, rolling it on a finger and staring at Clarke like she was the most beautiful creature she had ever seen. Clarke had not stopped a moment to caress Lexa's face, as if she was not sure of what had happened, like she was making sure she was there on that couch, cuddling with Lexa. When a yawn escaped from Clarke's lips, Lexa leaned forward and rubbed her face in her neck, chuckling.  
  
“Maybe we should go to bed.” Lexa murmured.  
  
Clarke nodded in assent but she did not move and Lexa rolled her eyes as she melted from the embrace to stand up. When she saw that the girl did not seem willing to stand up, she chuckled and leaned out to grab her, picking her up and Clarke instinctively wrapped her arms around her neck. Clarke took advantage of the fact that she was being carried and she looked around curious, eager to know, through those walls, a bit more of Costia. Lexa led her into what once was surely the room that belonged to the two of them and she sat in the middle of the bed with a frown.  
  
“It's okay, Clarke.” Lexa reassured her sitting on the edge. “This house has been closed for so long, I'm sure Costia would be happy to know that I'm using it with someone I care about.”  
  
Clarke stared at her intently and she took the frame that was on the bedside table, tracing the outlines of the two girls with a small smile. “She was really beautiful.”  
  
“She really was.” Lexa agreed crawling towards her to look at the picture. “One of the most beautiful women I've ever seen.”  
  
“One of the most beautiful?”  
  
“The other one is here in front of me.” she murmured.  
  
Clarke could not help but blush, then she put the frame away and she avoided Lexa's gaze but that did not stop her from utter the next question. “Do you think she would approve?” she asked in a whisper. “Us, I mean.”  
  
There was a long moment of silence, and finally Lexa nodded, a small smile on her lips. “Yes, I'm sure.” she murmured. “In fact, I think it was her who brought us together that night.”  
  
“What do you mean?” she asked confused.  
  
“The night we met, as I told you, I went into the diner by accident, just because I needed a coffee before disappearing.”  
  
“Yes, I remember.” Clarke nodded.  
  
“Well, as you may have noticed, this apartment is not far from the diner.” she continued. “I came here to... say goodbye? In fact I do not even know why I came here, but when I did, I saw this plastic cup on the kitchen counter and I remembered that Costia was often at the diner having breakfast before going to work.”  
  
Clarke frowned at those words, especially for the irony of the fate. If she had not insisted with the owner for the evening shift, the one paid a few dollars more, she would probably have had the opportunity to meet Costia before the tragedy.  
  
“So I made a stop.” Lexa continued. “One coffee before going on the road for an unknown destination and then I met you...” she stared at her intently. “And I'm sure it was her merit, because I was lost and even though it took me too long to figure it out, you saved me.”  
  
Clarke was silent for a long moment, she gave a little look at Costia's photos and wondered about the words that Lexa had had just said. She liked the idea that the girl had sent Lexa to her, maybe in an untidy way but just for helping the Fate and she smiled, thanking the girl silently. Despite all that had happened, Lexa was an important part of her life, she always had been and she could not lie about it. She was ripped from her thoughts when she felt the mattress move and when she looked up, she saw Lexa standing in front of the bed before heading to the door.  
  
“If you need anything, feel like you're at home.” she said with a small smile. “I will be in the oth-” she stopped when she saw Clarke shaking her head vigorously.  
  
Clarke pulled back the covers to the side and she slipped under, leaving the space to her left, before beating her hand on the blanket and Lexa bit her lower lip, undecided.  
  
“Come to bed, Lexa.” Clarke murmured.  
  
Lexa stared at her for a long moment and then she approached hesitant, she slipped under the covers before turning off the bedside light. She remained motionless, staring at the ceiling and she sighed when she felt Clarke's body sliding toward her and her head leaning on her shoulder.  
  
“Relax.” she whispered. “I just want to be sure that you're here with me.”  
  
“I am.” Lexa assured clenching her. “I'm here, I'm not going anywhere, Clarke, not anymore.”  
  
“We still have much to talk about.” Clarke murmured. “We still have many things to fix.”  
  
“I know.” Lexa said. “But I promise you, I'll do anything to make it up to you.”  
  
“Shhh...” Clarke whispered. “Sleep now, we can talk about it tomorrow.”  
  
Lexa heard Clarke's sigh on her skin and she closed her eyes, feeling the steady breathing of the girl, a sign that she was about to fall asleep peacefully in her arms. She shivered when she felt Clarke's lips leaning on her shoulder and she let out a small groan of appreciation when their legs entwined.  
  
“Good night, Lexa.” she whispered in the darkness.  
  
“Good night, Clarke.” she said softly, resting her cheek on Clarke's head.  
  
They still had much to talk about, they had decisions to make and there was still a divorce hanging over their heads, but Lexa was sure that they could get out of it together. She knew that talking and discussing together would make them able to figure out how to take or not their journey. And with that thought, for the first time in years, Lexa felt safe in someone else’s arms and she allowed herself to finally close her eyes.  
  
Everything else could wait.  
  
She and Clarke were worth the wait.  


 


	17. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day early, I will be very busy with work and my best friend's birthday this week end, so here!  
> The two finally get to know each other
> 
> Enjoy!

**Chapter 16**

  
  
Lexa had not thought that their first date would be like that, simply because it was not her style but she had learned during recent weeks that Clarke had her own way of doing things. The morning after she and Clarke had woken up at Costia's home, things had begun to turn in the right direction. Together they decided to set aside, at least for a while, the divorce papers and to start again.  
  
They would remain married but they would learn to know each other, starting to go out to date like a normal couple. It was as if they had made a clean sweep, and they have decided to rebuild their story brick by brick. Lexa knew she had to win back Clarke's trust but she was ready to do anything to get it and she would give to Clarke all the time in the world.  
  
After spending weeks texting, calling and seeing each other for a few hours during the lunch break to eat together or to grab a coffee, Lexa was surprised when Clarke had invited her out that night. She had been even more surprised when Anya had told her that morning that she and Raven would be coming a bit late because they had to settle some business.  
  
Now she was standing in that bar where she would have never gone on her own, holding between her fingers a pool cue, observing Clarke and Raven chatting as they waited for Anya to return with their orders, Lexa decided that yes, that evening would be undoubtedly interesting. The sound of wood that fell on the floor ripped her from her thoughts, bringing her attention to Clarke's embarrassed face who had bent to pick up the pool cue that had just fallen from her hands.  
  
“Well, I just made the first bad impression of the evening, now I feel more peaceful.” Clarke muttered accompanied by Raven's laughter.  
  
Lexa moved to her side. “Have you ever played?” she asked putting the pool cue on the table.  
  
“Sometimes in college but I've never really put commitment into it.” she said. “As you can see, I don't even remember how to hold the pool cue.” she giggled embarrassed.

Lexa found her adorable.”Come on, come here, I'll show you.” she invited her motioning to approach the table.  
  
Lexa set some balls on the green table and showed Clarke how to place her hands on the stick, trying to keep her gaze on their position. When Clarke leaned over the table in an awkward attempt to hit the white ball with the cue tip, Lexa smiled leaning on her elbows on the table in front of her, watching her. She said to Clarke how to position herself, how to keep balance and how to be able to control the direction of the stick, only to have to back off when the tip almost collided with her left eye.  
  
“I don't think staying there is a good idea” Clarke chuckled embarrassed.  
  
“No.” Lexa smiled reaching out and settling behind her. “Definitely not.” she placed Clarke's hands on the pool cue, trying to focus despite the scent of those blonde hair.  
  
“Okay, try again.” Lexa murmured in her ear.  
  
She repented the idea when Clarke's perfect ass pressed against her groin, as she leaned on the table. Lexa bent down with her, pushing behind her ear a rebellious blonde lock.  
  
“Now keep your hands like I showed you.” she whispered directly into the ear that she had just uncovered, smiling when she saw the goose bumps along her arms. “Exactly, just like that.” she continued covering Clarke's hands with her own.

Clarke settled and that perfect ass rubbed against Lexa's pelvis.  
  
Lexa cleared her throat. “Now focus on the tip and align it with the white ball.” she continued, her voice hoarse, trying to focus on what she was doing, rather than the heat she could already feel in her body.

“Like this?” Clarke asked hoarsely.  
  
“Exactly…” Lexa murmured. “Now hold strong the cue, do not let it go...” her lips brushed against Clarke's ear “Then, when you're ready, hit it.”

Clarke bit her lower lip and pushed her ass more against Lexa's pelvis, as she pulled back the cue and hit the white ball, that quickly moved on the table, hitting one of the other colored balls.  
  
Lexa smiled proudly against her ear, unconsciously pushing hard against her ass. “Well done.” she murmured, ignoring Anya's figure who was returning with their drinks.

“Get a room!” Raven and Anya said in unison, while Anya arranged the drinks on the table.  
  
“If you two stop this little show, maybe we can start playing seriously.” Anya snorted taking a sip of her beer.

Raven's arms wrapped around her wife's hips and the two looked at each other intensely for a long moment, before Anya's eyebrow raised in a playful expression.  
  
“You do not really want to wager as last time, right ?” she asked, amused.  
  
“I love having the ability to command you and make you do anything I want.” Raven murmured, raising herself to kiss her on the lips. “More than usual.” she added later.  
  
“Do you make us participants?” Lexa asked after separating from the intoxicating warmth of Clarke's body.

“Oh, it's just a small bet that we enjoy to do to revitalize our challenges.” Raven explained without leaving her wife. “The loser has to do whatever the winner wants for a week.”  
  
“Why? Is not it what you usually do?”” Lexa said, shaking her head and looking at them bored.

“How are your legs, Lexa?” Anya asked, grinning. “Has Clarke already made you break the world record of high jump?”  
  
Lexa twisted her mouth at the provocation, she could not even protest because it was the truth.

“So, what do you think, Clarke?” Raven asked putting an arm around her. “Do you want to show these two grumpy faces how to play?”  
  
“Why not, I feel positive, what are you going to put in the pot, Woods?”  
  
Lexa studied her, intrigued by the simple challenge that tickled her competitiveness but at the same time reluctant to take advantage of Clarke's inexperience in her own favor.

She did not like to win without fighting.  
  
“I don't know if you should play against me and Anya.” she said cautiously, she did not want to offend the girl. “Maybe we should take a first r – ooffff!” the air was pushed out of her lungs, when Clarke slammed the pool cue against her chest.

“Shut up and play, Woods.” she commanded.  
  
“Monday morning I want my coffee delivered to my office in the balance of that pretty little nose of yours, Forrest.” Raven smiled triumphantly as soon as the eight ball ended up in the corner, pushed by a shot scored by Clarke.

“Are you fucking kidding?!” Anya exclaimed disconcerted, still incredulous how that game had turned from a certain victory to a massive and humiliating defeat.  
  
Clarke lifted from the table with a satisfied smile and walked toward Lexa, one hand still holding the pool cue and the other rose to fix the collar of her shirt.

“Apparently, I will be the one to choose where we go on our next date.”  
  
Lexa looked at her incredulously. “You lied to me! You said you've only done a few games in college!”

Clarke chuckled. “Well, it's true.” she said, amused. “Since then I have never played again but that doesn't change the fact that I have never paid a single penny for drinks when I was in college. I won every single one.”  
  
“I'm surprised you manage to remember those years then.” Raven chuckled.”You must have always been drunk."

“I cannot believe it.” Lexa pouted crossing her arms over her chest.

Clarke laughed and placed a small kiss on her cheek. “Come on, don't make that face, I promise that I will offer you a second date that you can never forget.” she murmured, close to her lips.  
  
Lexa was certain that her legs had suddenly become jelly, so she nodded, not trusting her voice to answer.

  
****  
  
When a few days later, staring at the mustard stain on the black fabric, Lexa understood that Clarke had not lied when she said she would not forget their second date. Lexa rolled her eyes annoyed because she had always loved that shirt. When Clarke had won the bet and had proposed to go out for dinner, certainly Lexa had not expected that she meant to eat a hot dog outside the cinema.  
  
Lexa had tried to object, because she was dressed elegant for the occasion, imagining to sit in a nice restaurant and dine quietly, chatting with the girl. But Clarke did not want to listen: she loved the place and she wanted to share that experience with her and then Lexa could not say no. Now with that stain on her shirt, Lexa certainly could not go into the cinema and enjoy the movie because everyone could see her in that state. She did not realize that she had a pout on the lips, until Clarke shook her head and chuckled slipping her arm around her waist resting her head on her shoulder.  
  
“Was that hot dog really bad?” she asked, looking into her eyes, Lexa shook her head. “So, why do you have that face?”  
  
Lexa did not answer, she just threw a desperate look at her shirt and Clarke laughed, burying her face in Lexa's shoulder as they walked in the line.  
  
“It's not funny, Clarke.” she pointed out. “I cannot go around like this, people will keep looking at me and I'm not going to enjoy the film at the thought that everyone knows that I have a dirty shirt.”  
  
“Oh, come on.” Clarke said amused. “It's just a stain, no one will see it, they are here for the film not to mention the fact that Alexandria Woods has a stain on her shirt.”  
  
Lexa frowned: no matter what Clarke could said, she did not feel comfortable and the fact that the mustard stain was staring at her like it was challenging her, certainly did not help. Lexa was always impeccable in her public appearances, even if she went to take a coffee.  
  
“I will allow you to choose the film if you give me a nice smile.” Clarke said rubbing her nose against her neck, when she saw that Lexa still had a frown, she upped the ante. “What if I give you a kiss?” she suggested.  
  
Lexa looked at her curiously and before she could answer, she felt those perfect lips lay a light kiss on the corner of her mouth and this, inevitably, ripped a small happy smile. They stopped in front of the cashier and Clarke waited for Lexa to decide the film, just as she had promised; what came out from her lips was definitely something she was not prepared for.

“Star Wars?” she asked surprised.  
  
“What can I say, I like the classics.” she shrugged, as the woman gave her two tickets. “What?” she asked confused when she saw Clarke watching her intently.

“You're full of surprises, Miss Woods.” Clarke simply answered, as they walked away.  
  
“Hall D.”Lexa read on the ticket indicating a point on the back of the room.

“I'll be there in a minute.” Clarke said leaning to give her another kiss on the cheek. “I want popcorn.”  
  
“I can go-” Lexa tried to protest but Clarke silenced her with another kiss.

“Just keep me the spot warm.” she said with a wink.  
  
Lexa should have started getting used to the unpredictable way in which Clarke faced life. The long-sleeved shirt with Star Wars's symbol, that Lexa was wearing as they left the cinema, should have been a tangible proof of that. After being gone for at least fifteen minutes, Clarke had come back before the film started with a bowl of popcorn able to feed the entire Marine Corps, a coke and a shirt tucked under her arm.  
  
After a heated argument - that Lexa had lost almost immediately - Clarke was able to escort her to the bathroom and make Lexa wear the gift that she had carefully chosen for her. Lexa had to admit that she appreciated the gesture, considering all the complaints she made about her shirt and she had spent the whole time staring at the screen with a stupid smile on her lips.  
  
When the girl had approached and leaned her head on her shoulder, sliding her hand in hers and being like this for the duration of the film, Lexa had simply felt in paradise. Clarke was right: it was the best date she'd ever had and she was sure that she would remembered it forever, for the simple fact that it was in Clarke's company.  
  
When the lights were on and they had started walking out of the cinema, Clarke had not left her hand, as they reached the parking lot. Even while Lexa was driving, Clarke had placed her palm against Lexa's hand.  
  
“You're so chivalrous.” Clarke smiled, letting Lexa help her get out of the car.  
  
“A girl like you deserves to be treated like the rare flower that she is.” Lexa replied immediately, closing the car door  
  
Clarke could not help but blush at those words, she knew that Lexa was hiding a coquettish and charming side but during their week together, despite having repeatedly demonstrated her gallantry, she was never exposed in that way.  
  
“Are you wooing me, Miss Woods?” she asked with a small smile as she reached the door of her apartment.  
  
“Always.” Lexa said, stopping a few feet from her.  
  
“Your wooing would be more effective if you did not wear that.” Clarke teased, touching her shirt.  
  
Lexa put back that adorable pout for which Clarke was crazy. “I know."” she said. “But it is a gift from one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen, this is enough to make it special to my eyes.”  
  
Lexa jumped when Clarke's hands grabbed the shirt edges, pushing her to her body, pressing her forehead against hers, cutting off her breath.  
  
“Is she prettier than me?” she asked, amused.

Lexa got lost in her blue eyes and smiled. “No one is more beautiful than you.” she whispered.  
  
Clarke leaned over to kiss her sweetly and Lexa sighed on her lips, stroking her back.  
  
“Do you want to come over for a drink?” she asked softly.  
  
“Maybe another time.” she said, shaking her head. “I have an important meeting tomorrow, and I'm sure if I come over for a drink, I won’t go to bed before three o'clock.”  
  
“Are you saying that I will distract you from your work?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.  
  
“It is true.” when Lexa saw her indignant face, she gave her a quick kiss on the lips. “The best distraction in the world, Clarke. All I do is thinking of you every second of every day... “  
  
“Lexa...” she sighed, completely speechless.  
  
“I text you as soon as I get home.” she murmured rubbing her nose against hers.  
  
Clarke nodded gently, taking off from her grip, looking for the keys in the bag, observing Lexa walking toward the car.  
  
“Good night, Clarke.”  
  
“Good night, Lexa.” she replied with a smile.  
  
Clarke watched her get into the car and disappear around the corner before entering in the house, holding in her hands the shirt Lexa had forgotten. She smiled and stroked the collar with her fingertips before taking the fabric to her nose: she had just found what to wear that night.  
  
  
****

  
After almost a month, Lexa had not still got used to the perfect way Clarke appeared in her arms, or how her head fitted very well under her chin, or even the wonderful smell of her hair tickled her nose. Lexa sighed with happiness, running her fingers along Clarke's warm back, trying not to push aside the blanket that wrapped their body to prevent them from getting cold.

Clarke had not felt well for most of the week and finally, exhausted, she had decided to spend the weekend in a kind of quarantine, informing Lexa that they would go out on Monday for lunch, when the danger of infection had been avoided. Lexa, however, in view of the business trip that would take her to be absent for at least three weeks, had not wanted to listen to reason. She went to Clarke's home with soup, aspirin and she was ready for a marathon of cuddles.  
  
She had not objected when Clarke had told her that she had just started a super marathon of Buffy the Vampire Slayer; she sat beside her on the sofa and they had eaten the soup while they commented on all the scenes of the show. An hour later, Clarke had forced her to lie down - no longer worried about being able to infect her - and she was lying on her, settling herself comfortably in her arms, leaving Lexa cuddle her and kissing her all the time.  
  
Everything went well until Clarke had not made a comment rather acid against one of the characters, Angel, and by then the war had exploded.  
  
“Oh, come on, Angel was the most boring person could exist!” Clarke complained, sitting up, putting as more space as possible between her and that traitor. “I think if I had the misfortune to meet someone so boring, I'd shoot myself in the head.”  
  
Lexa opened her mouth indignantly. “I feel deeply offended.” she said, straightening. “I find myself very much in him!”  
  
“But please.” Clarke laughed. “You don't even have one stupid tuft of hair, Lexa.”  
  
“Don't tell me you were a Spike fan.” Lexa narrowed her eyes, studying her closely, when she saw a smile on Clarke's lips, she raised her hands to the sky. “I guess I should have seen that coming, who else could it be? So are you the typical girl who likes assholes?”  
  
“Do not offend him!” Clarke said pointing a finger at her. “Spike was a wonderful character, worthy of love as and perhaps more than Angel.”  
  
Lexa rolled her eyes. “So you're one of those girl.” she continued. “Those girls chasing the quarterback throughout all high school, begging him to a bit of attention and when he treats them like a used rag, they continue to grovel at his feet.”  
  
Clarke's eyes widened. “That's not what Buffy did!” she replied. “And if you really want to know, I was more interested in cheerleaders instead of the quarterback!”  
  
Completely crowded out by those words, Lexa remained silent for a moment and then, unable to restrain herself, she began to laugh out loud, throwing her head back. Clarke frowned, confused but when she saw Lexa continue to laugh, she could not help but join her.

“We had definitely something in common.” Lexa pointed out, wiping her hand on the side of the eye.  
  
“Do you blame me?” she replied with amusement in her voice. “With those tiny skirts and bare legs...”  
  
Lexa continued to chuckle, shaking her head. “I have never had the luck to slip under their skirts.”  
  
“No?” she asked in surprise. “The great Alexandria Woods was a loser in high school?!”  
  
“It pains me to admit it, but yes.” she said. “I was not good at talking to girls, I always blushed if any of them spoke to me and stuttered constantly.”  
  
“I bet you were adorable.” Clarke chanted.  
  
“I'm not adorable!” she defended herself immediately.

Clarke crawled towards her and lay back on her body, her nose touching her, her eyes swallowing her green irises.  
  
“Now you're not for sure.” she agreed. “But at that time you were and I am sure that deep down inside of you, there’s still that little babbling girl. Maybe if you're good...” she murmured, licking her bottom lip. “One of these days I could dress myself as a cheerleader for you...”  
  
Lexa could not help but let out a little moan at that, but she stood still waiting for her next move, not marveling when Clarke's lips closed on hers with need. It was different from all the other kisses, it was passionate but not like the ones they had exchanged in the studio, not delicate as those which they had shared in Costia's apartment.

It was obvious by the way Lexa put her fingers in her hair, sighing on her lips and only when both gasped, they broke away, their eyes closed and their breathings heavy.  
  
“You had to find those cheerleaders very beautiful.” Clarke whispered on her lips.  
  
Lexa laughed again, pushing herself against the back of the sofa and Clarke followed her, closing her lips again with hers in a fiery kiss.  
  
_**“Don't worry, I will take care of it. You are Buffy, right?”**_  
  
The voice of the character forced Clarke to break the kiss and she looked back at the television, where Faith was fighting a vampire, ripping an amused smile from her lips.  
  
“Let us end this war, decreeing that the best choice would be Faith.” Clarke declared.  
  
“Mmm hmm.” Lexa granted. “I agree.”  
  
But when Lexa's lips met hers, the TV was forgotten for the rest of the evening.  
  
  
****  
  
A month was too long for Lexa and she was sure that Clarke thought the same thing and because of that, for the first time in years, she was not concerned to leave work early and spend the whole day in the company of the woman who held her heart. When she texted her, Clarke had already made commitments, since they had set their date for that evening, but despite this, Lexa had wanted to see her.  
  
So, she had joined her and that was the reason why Lexa was watching one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen: Luna. It was one of the most adorable things she had ever set her eyes on and the way Luna was staring at her was making her stomach tighten in an almost suffocating grip of love. She loved children, she loved their tiny feet, she loved the way they babbled nonsense, she loved their toothless smiles and especially she loved how fragile they appeared in her arms.  
  
Clarke had introduced her to the parents of that little miracle, Lincoln and Octavia: they were one of the most well-assorted couples she had been lucky enough to see. Octavia, beautiful and joyous, had welcomed her without hesitation in that moment with a sweet smile and lots of questions. Lincoln, attractive and fun, had tried to make the most surly side, trying to understand her intentions, but when his daughter had shaken her tiny fist on his big finger, he had melted like snow in the sun.  
  
In that moment Clarke was like him, sitting on the sofa in their apartment, playing with the little girl's hands, bringing them to her mouth and pretending to bite down, while Luna gave her playful giggles. Lexa, from the kitchen, was staring at them with pounding heart, eager to join her but not wanting to invade - more than she had already done - their time together.

She jumped when Octavia's hand brought her back to reality, forcing her to look away from that wonderful show, to point her look in her curious blue eyes.  
  
“Do you want to stay for dinner?” she asked with a small smile  
  
“I don't know.” she said clearing her throat. “We should ask Clarke.”

Octavia raised an eyebrow intrigued by that answer: she had asked her because she was sure that her best friend would accept without a second thought. She knew that Lexa would be away on a business trip for at least three weeks and probably they wanted to spend some time together.

Octavia lingered on her face and she could not help but chuckle at how Lexa was staring entranced at Clarke and Luna. It was the same way Lincoln looked at her and their daughter: love.  
  
“You love her.” she said without thinking.  
  
Lexa spun around to look at her and her cheeks were painted red, before she lowered her gaze a little embarrassed for being caught. Despite that, Lexa did not reply, she pointed her gaze back on Clarke and a small happy smile appeared on her face. Octavia knew that probably Lexa was not ready to say those words out loud, so she let the subject drop, squeezing her shoulder again.  
  
“Let's ask Clarke if she wants to stay for dinner.” she urged, before letting her go and shorten the distance that separated her from the couch.  
  
Lexa stayed behind for a few seconds and finally reached the table where she had placed the gift that she had taken for the baby while they were around. She placed it behind her back and reached the group, settling in front of Clarke who gave her a smile full of joy.  
  
“I bought a small gift for the child...” she began a little embarrassed, putting a hand behind her neck.  
  
“Lexa, this was not necessary.” Octavia said.  
  
“I saw it and I could not resist.” she explained.  
  
She settled kneeling in front of the little girl and smiled at her, toying with her foot, before pulling out from behind her back a puppet: a raccoon. Luna's eyes pointed on the raccoon and Lexa moved it in front of her face, before holding the nose of the puppet on her, sparking a series of happy verses.  
  
“She likes it!” Octavia said.  
  
Lexa let Luna take the raccoon and she tickled her tummy, smiling at her laughter and the way she brought the nose of the puppet to her mouth. She melted completely at that sight and even more when Clarke put her hand around her waist, resting her head on her shoulder.  
  
“It was a nice thought.” she murmured softly.  
  
“Every child needs a little friend to count on.” she said. “I had a similar one, a gift from my father, I never left it.”  
  
“Did it have a name?” Clarke asked curiously.

Lexa was silent, staring at Luna that was getting acquainted with her new friend. “Commander Raccoon.” she said softly.

She was not surprised when Clarke started giggling, hiding her head directly into her neck to mitigate the noise. Lexa rolled her eyes, before giving her a kiss on the head, waiting for Clarke to finish laughing at her.  
  
“I also had a favorite puppet.” she finally confessed, watching her from her potion. “A lion, I took it everywhere, I think it died without legs and with some other missing pieces.”  
  
“And let me hear, what was its name?”  
  
Clarke rubbed her nose against hers. “Wanheda.”  
  
Lexa looked at her with a raised eyebrow in search of explanations but she forgot about it quickly when Clarke kissed her softly.  
  
“Octavia invited us to dinner.” Lexa muttered over her mouth. “I told her to ask you.”

Clarke continued to touch her lips with hers, gently, without departing, as if she was unable, as if she felt sick at the thought of getting away.  
  
“You leave tomorrow, I thought you had plans for us tonight.”

“I have not.” she said. “I want to be with you, only that makes me happy, Clarke.”  
  
“God, Lexa, you're ...”  
  
She did not finish the sentence, she closed her mouth again, in a deeper kiss, a kiss full of promises and expectations. Only when Octavia cleared her throat to get their attention, Clarke released her, her cheeks a little red and her eyes full of happiness.  
  
“We would love to stay for dinner.” she said. “I could never deprive Lexa from the light of her eyes.” she continued, addressing clearly at the baby.  
  
“Oh shut up!” Lexa warned, fiddling with Luna's fingers. “How can you not want to give all your attention to such a creature? How?” she murmured enchanted by those eyes.

Clarke smiled and leaned her head back on Lexa's shoulder: after a long time she felt happy again.

  
****

Lexa held the conference room door open for Anya and let her pass, before quickly following her, unbuttoning the jacket she was wearing. If all went according to the plan, this would be the last meeting before the actual fusion with the Los Angeles company she was working on for months.

Anya took place as she kept talking to her wife on the phone and Lexa followed her example, placing the papers and the coffee on the long table. Since her lawyer appeared to be caught in that important conversation, Lexa grabbed her phone, ready to write a good morning text to Clarke but she was surprised to notice that the girl seemed to have anticipated her.  
  
“ _ **It's such a waste..**_.” a preview of the message recited.

But Lexa could clearly see that Clarke had attached a picture. She looked into the room, which was filling up slowly for that morning meeting and she bit her lower lip considering her options. She was not sure that opening that text would allow her to focus on her meeting. But she would not be able to focus either way, not with the curiosity to know what was in that photo.  
  
She sighed heavily and surrendered, placing her finger on the screen and waiting for her phone to let her see what Clarke was eager to show her that she could not wait a few hours. Lexa let out a strangled sound and, for a moment, she lost the grip on the phone that slammed with a thud on the papers that were leaning in front of her.  
  
Lexa looked around, the sound of her heart pounding in her ears and she thanked God that no one had noticed anything, except Anya who was staring at her curiously. Lexa quickly grabbed the phone to prevent her colleague and good friend to see the picture. She shook her head, not ready to give any explanation but mostly because her brain did not seem very inclined to form words in that moment.  
  
Her eyes fell immediately on what Clarke had sent her and she found herself swallowing the lump in her throat. She should not feel that way for a simple picture, considering the way they had already consumed their intimacy but since they had decided to take things slow, to get to know each other, to date, to do things like every normal couple, that was definitely unexpected. It had been so long since Lexa was actually able to see Clarke that way, so she had found herself completely unprepared.  
  
In the photo, Clarke was wearing her black shirt, the one she had taken off at the cinema and, because of the different size of their torsos, the fabric held Clarke in a wonderful caress and remained slightly open on her chest, revealing clearly that there was no bra to bind up those wonderful breasts.  
  
With trembling hands Lexa typed a quick response: “ _ **Clarke...**_ ”  
  
She closed her eyes and put the phone on the desk, watching the rest of the people fill the room and she cast a glance at the clock hanging above the window: there were only ten minutes left to the beginning of the meeting. The vibration of the phone caught her attention again and fortunately Lexa saw that there was no other image sent to attempt on her life.  
  
“ _ **I like to wear your shirt to sleep, it's**_ _ **like**_ _ **your body**_ _ **is**_ _ **cover**_ _ **ing**_ _ **me**_.”

That sentence made Lexa smile but she did not have time to type an answer because another text came immediately after.

“ _ **And I miss you, three weeks is too much, Lexa, I miss you so much**_.”

Lexa sighed heavily and her fingers moved quickly: “ _ **I miss you too, Clarke. Definitely three weeks is too much, just... wait for me.**_ ”

“ _ **Wait for you?**_ ”  
  
Lexa knew she should not continue that game, not with one of the most important meetings of the week only eight minutes away but she missed Clarke and the idea of playing with her took her fancy more than she wanted to admit.  
  
Lexa licked her lips: “Yes, wait for me, I assure you it is worth it.”  
  
When Clarke did not respond for more than two minutes, Lexa thought she had put the phone down and she looked up, only to meet Anya's look that made clear she knew what was happening.  
  
“Your girlfriend has perfect timing.” Anya scoffed.  
  
“We're not doing anything.” Lexa defended herself immediately. _ **  
  
“**_ _ **Maybe I should start by myself.**_ ”  
  
Her breath froze in her throat at that but she did not have time to respond because she heard clearly Anya's laughter.

“From your face it does not seem like that.” she said. “And certainly it is not what I saw.”

“Anya!” Lexa blushed, unable to help herself. “This is an invasion of privacy! Mi-mine and Clarke's.”  
  
The phone vibrated again but Lexa did not notice what Clarke had attached, she simply ran her finger on the screen, holding it as far as possible from her friend.  
  
“Oh please, you've seen worse things on my phone.”  
  
“And I regret it, believe me.” Lexa pointed.  
  
“Well, then she should not send those photos while you're with other people if she doesn't want anyone to see.”  
  
Lexa ignored her and when her eyes pointed on the screen, she could not hold back the groan that escaped from her lips, so strong that many people in the room turned to stare at her, while Anya at her side could only chuckle amused.

“I'll buy her a bouquet of flowers.” Anya ruled. “Clarke, right now has my most sincere esteem. The great Alexandria Woods reduced to a whimpering pile of flesh for a couple of photos, this is all too good to be forgotten.”  
  
But Lexa was not listening, her eyes were fixed on the screen, fixed on the perfect forms - oh, _so_ perfect – of Clarke's body in a play of shadows that didn't allow her to see a lot but that was literally killing her.  
  
Clarke had settled on the bed, the shirt tail had been opened to show the expanse of her marble skin, both flaps were arranged in order to cover most of her breast but it was enough to show their perfect roundness. Lexa's eyes watched her breastbone, down up to the abdomen, until she found Clarke's hand slipped into the rubber band of the lace panties she was wearing.  
  
“ _ **Like I said I should start by myself, just to be sure to be warm enough for when you come back..**_.”  
  
“Oh God...” she sighed softly, feeling something fidgeting in her belly.  
  
Clarke was playing in a rather unfair way: she knew perfectly well that Lexa was not in the right condition to answer; she glanced at the clock: two minutes left. She quickly licked her lips and turned her attention back to the picture, remembering how she had felt nice to caress Clarke's skin.

When the meeting room door closed, decreeing the beginning of the meeting, Lexa braced herself and looked away from the photo and replied quickly.  
  
“ _ **I remember how you can become hot, Clarke. Keep yourself warm for me and show me when I get back to the hotel.**_ ”

Then she turned off the phone and set it on the table, grabbing the papers of the presentations and getting to her feet, straightening her shirt and closing the button of her jacket.  
  
“We are here today to discuss the upcoming merger between Wood's Corporation and...”  
  
  


****

  
After spending hours in the meeting room, explaining, talking and illustrating the various charts, Lexa was finally able to get out of that building, exhausted but satisfied. She and Anya had agreed to meet for dinner to discuss the last details so they can finally go back to Washington. When she turned on her phone, she found another photo of Clarke, in a bathrobe, the front almost unbuttoned and a raised eyebrow.  
  
Lexa had come to the conclusion that if she wanted to focus on her meeting with Anya, she had to do something to release tension and, after wearing her sport clothes, she went jogging. It had taken longer than she expected and when she returned to the hotel, she found some of Clarke's calls and a text in which she was a bit annoyed for having lost their evening appointment in video call, so, still breathing hard for the running, she wrote Clarke a quick text and she sat down at the table and opened the computer.  
  
Lexa knew that Clarke was not really angry but often she liked to do the diva just to keep alive her interest, as if it were possible for Lexa to lose interest, especially after the way Clarke had teased her that morning.  
  
Clarke appeared on the screen, a joyous smile on her face and wet hair, a sign that she had showered recently. “Lexa!”  
  
"Good evening, Clarke." she greeted her, Lexa was happy to see the girl.  
  
“How did it go? Are you able to enlarge even more your empire, Miss Woods? “ Clarke teased but she was sincerely concerned.  
  
Lexa had left for the business trip, for an important fusion for her company, in order to open a branch office in Los Angeles and then maybe, in the future, expand to San Francisco and San Diego.  
  
“It went well, we have to establish a couple of things, to draw up the contract but we are on track.” she said with a small smile. “How was your day?”  
  
“Good, busy but very good.” she said. “I'm working a lot, the new exhibition is approaching and I have lots of things to do but I'm happy.”  
  
“I can see it.” Lexa murmured. “Your eyes are shining, Clarke, it is...beautiful.”  
  
Clarke shifted her eyes over Lexa’s body that was still sweating and she bit her lower lip. “You are beautiful.” she said in a whisper.  
  
Lexa smiled and she desired to cross the screen in that moment to hold her but the only thing she could do was stick out her hand and caress the figure on the screen.  
  
“Are you touching me again?” Clarke asked.  
  
“Maybe...”  
  
“I'd give anything to have you here to actually do it.” Clarke confessed approaching the camera. “I cannot wait for you to touch me. It's getting boring touching myself, again and again.”  
  
Lexa took a shaky breath. “Clarke...” she sighed. “You don't know what I'd give to be there.”  
  
“Take a plane and show me.” Clarke muttered. “Or let me watch.”  
  
“Clarke Griffin, are you suggesting what I think?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.  
  
“Maybe.” she whispered. “Is it working?”  
  
Lexa remained silent for a moment, remembering what had happened that morning, the way Clarke seemed to have fun teasing her though she knew perfectly of her morning meeting. A small grin was painted on her lips, while an idea of revenge began to form in her mind.  
  
“I have dinner with Anya.” she said, standing up, chuckling when Clarke let out a groan of disappointment. “But if I do it in a hurry...” she walked away from the table, allowing Clarke to have a complete view of her body.  
  
Clarke was enchanted by Lexa’s thighs wrapped in those leggings that did not leave much to the imagination and that top allowed her to see her abs still damp of sweat. Clarke's eyes pointed on her butt and when Lexa turned, showing the curve of her back, Clarke could not help but lick her lips.  
  
“You're such a tease.” Clarke muttered with her bottom lip between her teeth.  
  
When Lexa's hands reached the edges of the top, she pulled it over her head in one fluid motion, leaving her back naked and letting her eyes pass on her beautiful tattoo, Clarke groaned slightly.  
  
“Turn around.” she begged.  
  
“Turn around like this?” she asked amused, as she put herself at one side without letting Clarke see her chest.  
  
“The other side!”  
  
“Like this?” she asked, leaving her to watch her back for a long moment, looking at her from over her shoulder.  
  
“Lexa!” Clarke whined. “Turn around!”  
  
Lexa smiled and turned slightly, her hands covering her breasts. She felt damn good when she saw Clarke moving towards the edge of the chair to get a better look. “I have to go or I'll be late.” Lexa murmured. “Anya is waiting for me.”  
  
"Lexa, wha-” the statement stopped halfway when the girl threw the shirt straight to the camera, obscuring the view. “Lexa! Th-that's unfair!”  
  
“Just as it's unfair to send me those photos while I'm in a meeting.” she pointed out. “But that did not stop you from provoking me.” she continued, and even if Clarke could not see, she was sure that Lexa was stripping. “It's called revenge.”  
  
“Lexa!” Clarke growled.  
  
She heard Lexa laughing and footsteps moving away, Clarke fell back against the back of her chair with a heavy sigh. But when she heard the sound of the shower, the clear image of wet and soapy Lexa, hit her like a punch in the stomach. Clarke realized she deserved it.

  
  


 


	18. Chapter 17

  **Chapter 17**

  
  
Clarke fiddled with her straw, waiting for Raven to come back, she was absent for nearly ten minutes because of a mysterious call. She thought of the phone call she had with Lexa a few hours before. Apparently, things had not gone as Lexa had expected and she needed to stay in Los Angeles for a few more days, or even for another week. The thing was becoming quite difficult for Clarke, she could not wait to see Lexa again and even though she had learned to live without her for six years, after having spent all those months seeing her every day, she realized she wasn’t able to live without her.  
  
When Raven had invited her out for a drink, she had accepted without a second thought. She really needed to get distracted by the amount of work that had invested her in the past few days and by Lexa's absence that was starting to become difficult to manage. She had the impression that Raven had the same kind of problem, then an evening between friends was the medicine they both needed.  
  
She took a sip of her drink and watched the people in the room, trying to distract her mind from the constant thought of Lexa. She jumped when a hand rested on her shoulders and she turned abruptly, ready to yell at Raven for scaring her. When she turned she only saw a pair of green eyes that swallowed her up instantly.  
  
“Lexa...” she sighed breathlessly.  
  
When the smile, that now she was used to see on Lexa's lips, appeared, Clarke stood up.  
  
“Surprise.” she said with a shrug. “The problem that has arisen was solved in a short tim-”  
  
Lexa did not have time to finish the sentence, Clarke's lips closed on hers and instinctively Lexa's hands came to rest on her back to tighten her. The world vanished: three weeks were too long and Clarke wanted to make up for the lost time.  
  
“I missed you too.” Lexa murmured.  
  
“You have no idea, Lexa.” Clarke whispered, squeezing her neck with force. “You have no idea.” Lexa smiled and started a new kiss, passionate and full of ardor, Clarke's hands scratched her neck.  
  
“You owe me ten bucks.” Anya said as she set her briefcase on the table with a thud. “Not even twenty seconds.”  
  
Raven chuckled and kissed her nose. “You cannot talk, it was the same with you.” she pointed out.  
  
“But we're married.” she replied, before realizing what she had just said. “The young ladies here are _just_ dating.” she made the sign of the quotation marks with her fingers. “Although the indecent messages they have exchanged one another yesterday suggest that they are beyond that point.”  
  
This forced both to break away and Lexa addressed her an annoyed look, before turning her attention to Clarke.  
  
“I wanted to surprise you, I could not wait to see you, to hold you, to kiss you…” she muttered, passing her tongue on the edge of her mouth.  
  
Clarke returned the treatment sucking her lower lip and she was delighted by the little moan that Lexa let out and her hands shook Lexa's hips, pulling her closer.  
  
“Okay, okay!” Anya said, clapping her hands. “I'm not drunk enough to hold up all of this.”  
  
“And here I make a step forward.” Raven said, waving the bottle of champagne she held. “While waiting for these two, I have taken the trouble to buy this bottle to celebrate the upcoming merger.”  
  
Clarke put her arm around Lexa's waist and she held her tightly, as if their closeness was not enough, while she watched Anya open the bottle and pour the liquid into four glasses.  
  
“To our wonderful qualities of businesswomen.” Anya said.  
  
“To my talents of businesswomen and to your skills as a lawyer.” Lexa pointed with a raised eyebrow.  
  
“Just drink!” Anya growled.  
  
Soon the first glass turned to two, three, then the first bottle was gone, replaced by a variety of drinks that Anya had not stopped serving to all of the three. Soon, the only one with the lowest alcohol level in the blood was just Anya and as she started to feel the tiredness of the journey and the last three weeks of work, she had decided to stop, so that there was at least someone who could call a taxi.  
  
Her eyes pointed on Lexa and she could not help but smile at her friend who, for the first time in years, was relaxed and comfortable in a situation that did not belong to her that much. Lexa was not used to drink, unless she had to drink a few glasses of wine or champagne and, rarely in college, she had allowed herself to drink something stronger. So watching Clarke bring several glass to Lexa's lips and then kiss her to try the alcohol from her lips was a great show.  
  
“Let's dance.” Raven asked tenderly purring in her ear and kissing her neck.  
  
Anya shook her head slightly. “I'm exhausted, love.” she said. “But I'd love to watch you scrape on someone who cannot put a finger on you.”  
  
“Uhhh, I love you so much...” Raven murmured, kissing her gently.  
  
“Why don’t you ask Clarke?” Anya whispered. “Considering the show that we have put in place at the pride, I'm sure she will be more than willing to go wild on the dance floor.”  
  
“I think Clarke is quite busy at the moment.” she laughed nodding toward the two girls who were just sitting not so far.  
  
And she was not lying.  
  
Clarke was in fact sitting on her friend’s legs, her forehead pressed against Lexa’s, her hands firmly locked on her suspenders for balance and her hips whirled at the sound of the music. Lexa seemed enchanted by those movements, she was staring at her in a trance, as her hands were running back and forth along Clarke's thighs, without being too pushy. She leaned over to kiss her, moaning into her mouth when Clarke’s fingernails scratched her chest through her shirt without stopping her movements. Lexa's hand moved up to her back, to the neck, which she held tightly to deepen the kiss, sucking her lower lip with greed.  
  
“Okay, that's enough!” Anya clapped her hands. “If you two want to keep doing it just go home! Otherwise my wife would like to dance.”  
  
Clarke pulled away from that tempting mouth and smiled at Lexa while she was licking her lips.  
  
“Would you dance with me, Lexa?” Clarke murmured flirtatious.  
  
Lexa could simply shook her head, her eyes bright with passion and her head heavy, she was sure it was not just because of the alcohol.  
  
“I'm not good at dancing but I'm sure that Raven will be a viable substitute.”  
  
Raven had just gotten up and was holding out her hand. “Come on, Clarke.” she urged.  
  
“Just don’t cool down in my absence...” Clarke whispered, passing the tongue over her lower lip, caressing with sensuality one of the suspenders, before standing up and following Raven on the dance floor.  
  
Lexa threw her head back trying to take back control of her body, without much success, she was on fire. A fire that had started to burn when Clarke had teased her with that series of pictures and she had not stopped for a moment to wrap her body, especially given the way Clarke did nothing but tease her.  
  
“You're hopeless.” Anya told her amused. “Instead of hanging from her lips like a dog, why don’t you just follow her on the dance floor?”  
  
Lexa did not answer immediately. She did not care what her friend thought, because it was the truth and she did not ever care. Clarke possessed her completely, body and soul, even if they had not passed - at least not again - that invisible line that would have decreed the seriousness of their relationship.  
  
“I cannot dance.” she said and it was not a lie, even if the idea of watching Clarke in that moment was more appealing than trying to put one foot before the other.  
  
“Lexa, you don't have to know how to dance, but scrape with your girlfriend on the dance floor.” she said, pointing her wife and Clarke who were dancing nearby in a very intimate way. “Before someone else does of course.” she added, nodding to the two boys who were approaching the girls.  
  
Lexa's forehead furrowed immediately at the sight of the two boys and she straightened her back, when she saw one of them bend over to whisper something in Clarke's ear, approaching a little too much for her taste. Of course, she could not blame his resourcefulness, Clarke was absolutely wonderful that evening: a low-cut top bandaged her chest exposing her breasts, the skirt left her thighs uncovered and the boots, that reached just above the knees, completed the picture. She was so beautiful that Lexa lost her breath as soon as she saw her.  
  
No one could afford to touch her girlfriend like that.  
  
She grabbed a glass of vodka that was left abandoned on the table and drank it all in one sip, before taking off the jacket, tossing it carelessly on the arm of the chair. She licked her lips and walked the distance that separated her from the dance floor, eyes pointed on Clarke, who, with her back against Raven's chest, was looking at her with hungry eyes.   
  
Lexa put a hand on the boy's shoulder to move it away from her trajectory and when he started to protest, Clarke hooked her both hands on Lexa's suspenders, rolling them around her fingers, staring at her with a look far from innocent. The new song exploded into the speakers, getting Clarke a mischievous smile, while Beyoncé’s voice began to caress them.  
  
“ _ **I'm feeling sexy, I wanna hear you say my name girl...”**_ Clarke sang softly, as she made her way through the crowd, away from the boy and without taking her eyes off of Lexa. “ _ **If you can reach me, you can feel my burning flame.”**_ she took Lexa's hands and settled them on her stomach, then she leaned toward her. _ **“I'm feelin' kind of n-a-s-t-y.”**_ she muttered on her lips _ **. “I might just take you home with me.”  
  
**_ Lexa let out a groan, Clarke's hands caressed on her suspenders with sensuality, back and forth, as she licked her lips invitingly.  
  
_**Baby the minute i feel your energy**_  
_**Your vibe's just taken over me**_  
_**Start feelin' so crazy babe  
  
**_ Clarke ran her fingers along the fabric of her shirt, reaching the top buttons and quickly unbuttoning them, allowing her to feel Lexa's skin that seemed to burn.  
  
_**I feel the funk coming over me**_  
_**I don't know what's gotten into me**_  
_**The rhythm's got me feelin' so crazy babe  
  
**_ Lexa pulled her closer to her in order to make sure that their bodies were crushed against each other, she leaned her forehead against hers, staring into her eyes. Clarke continued to hold the suspenders between her fingers and she began to move with the music, rubbing her hips against Lexa's.  
  
" **Tonight i'll be your naughty girl, Lexa..."**  she murmured softly and licked Lexa's bottom lip.  
  
_**I'm callin' all my girls**_  
_**We're gonna turn this party out**_  
_**I know you want my body**_    
  
Lexa leaned forward in order to capture her mouth but Clarke shook her head and turned around, crushing her back against Lexa's chest. She started to move her butt straight into her pelvis, delighting herself with the groan of surprise that escaped from Lexa's lips.  
  
_**Tonight i'll be your naughty girl**_  
_**I'm callin' all my girls**_  
_**I see you look me up and down**_  
_**And i came to party**_  
  
Clarke's arm rose behind her head to grab the back of Lexa’s neck, while the other joined the two arms on her own belly, giving her permission to touch her. Lexa scratched her stomach, approaching to rest her cheek against Clarke's temple.  
  
“ _ **You're so sexy, tonight I am all yours, girl.”**_ Clarke whispered. “Do you want me, Lexa?”  
  
“God, Clarke...” she sighed.  
  
“Then touch me...” she whispered in an invitation.

 _ **The way your body moves across the floor**_  
_**You got me feelin' n-a-s-t-y**_  
_**I might just take you home with me  
  
**_ When she saw that Lexa did not seem willing to accomplish that sweet command, Clarke clasped their hands, dragging them down to her stomach, till her thighs.  
  
“Touch me.” she commanded in a hoarse voice.  
  
Lexa swallowed and left her hands running to the sides of Clarke’s legs, scraping the skin through her skirt, pulling the fabric with her hands and thanking God that the room was so dark. When her fingertips came in contact with the material of the thigh highs, Lexa almost felt lost and she gasped in her ear.  
  
“Are you trying to kill me?” she asked breathlessly.  
  
“I will if you do not begin to touch me.” Clarke said. “Prove to that boy that I belong to you.”  
  
_**Baby the minute i feel your energy**_  
_**The vibe's just taken over me**_  
_**Start feelin' so crazy babe**_  
  
One of Lexa's hands remained on her legs to play with the fabric of the garter belt, while the other climbed quickly through her belly, running to Clarke's chest and Lexa ran her fingers slowly - _oh, very slowly_ \- on the outline of her left breast.  
  
_**I feel the funk coming over me**_  
_**I don't know what's gotten into me**_  
_**The rhythm's got me feelin' so crazy babe**_  
  
Clarke threw her head back, completely resting against her chest, still moving her hips against Lexa's pelvis and observing those long fingers fiddle with the outline of her breasts. Finally, at the limit of resistance, she forced Lexa to close her palm across the bra cup, making them both moan. Lexa was drunk with sensations: among the alcohol, the girl's body pressed against her own and the desire to prove to that idiot he could not even look at her, it was hard for Lexa to breathe.

  
“ _ **Tonight I'll be your naughty girl.**_ ” Clarke sang in a hoarse voice, her lips moving on her jaw. _**"I'm callin' all my girls, we're gonna turn this party out...**_ ” she reached Lexa's hand that was still fiddling with the fabric of her garter belt, carrying it down, on her inner thigh. “ _ **I know you want my body...”  
  
**_ “Oh God...” Lexa gasped, her mouth moved frantic in search of Clarke's lips.  
  
_**Tonight I'll be your naughty girl**_  
_**I'm callin' all my girls**_  
_**I see you look me up and down**_  
_**And I came to party**_    
  
Clarke moved away, quickly turning in her embrace, she wrapped her arms around her neck and she closed her mouth with hers. Lexa responded immediately to that irresistible call and instinctively her hand found again her breast, squeezing it hard.  
  
_**I love to love you baby**_  
_**I love to love you baby**_  
_**I love to love you baby**_  
  
Clarke tied a leg around her waist, her fingers stuck in the curly hair behind Lexa's neck to hold her tight and Lexa’s free hand landed on her back to hold her closer.  
  
“Shit...” Clarke sighed when those perfect lips went down to suck her neck. “Keep touching me, Lexa, please. My skin is on fire, just... keep touching me.”   
  
Fulfilling her desire, Lexa's hand went down her back and closed on her buttock, making Clarke gasp and then she continued with her sensual caress to the leg that was tied around her waist. She touched her bare skin, scratching and slipping under Clarke's skirt, fiddling for a moment with the garter belt, before touching her wet underwear.  
  
_**Tonight I'll be your naughty girl**_  
_**I'm callin' all my girls**_  
_**We're gonna turn this party out**_  
_**I know you want my body**_    
  
“I want you...” Lexa whispered. “I’ve never wanted anything so badly in my entire life.”  
  
Clarke threw her head back, giving her better access, Lexa's fingers continued their advance and even though she wasn't touching her, she could clearly feel the warmth and wetness from that distance.

  
_**Tonight I'll be your naughty girl**_  
_**I'm callin' all my girls**_  
_**I see you look me up and down**_  
_**And I came to party**_  
  
“Take me home, Lexa.” Clarke commanded.  
  
Lexa nodded and closed her lips with hers again, she pushed her hand away from under her skirt. Despite the alcohol had clouded her mind and senses, she was lucid enough to understand she wanted to make love to Clarke in a bed, because the desire to adore her body was stronger than the momentary desire on the dance floor.  
  
  
****  
  
As soon as Clarke walked through the front door, the first thing she did was kicking her shoes off and sliding the sweat pants on the floor. She closed the door and stepped into the hall, holding the envelopes that she had recovered in the mailbox.  
  
“Lexa?” she called, running the zip of the sweatshirt she was wearing, as she crossed the living room. “Lexa?”  
  
“I'm in the bathroom, Clarke, I'll be out in a minute.” she said.  
  
She took off her sweatshirt, dropping it on the table, starting to have a look at her mail with interest. Lexa made her entrance into the room a few seconds later, wet hair, wearing shorts and the T-shirt Clarke had prepared on the bedside table before going out.   
  
Clarke smiled and instinctively reached to kiss her softly. “Good morning.” she whispered rubbing her nose against hers.  
  
“Good morning to you.” Lexa said, stroking her arms. “I missed you this morning.”  
  
Clarke groaned loudly. “I had completely forgotten that I was waiting for a delivery at the gallery.” she explained. “Fortunately, I set a reminder on my phone and this kindly woke me up this morning at eight.”  
  
Lexa stared at her curiously, reviewing her clothing: she was wearing her black shirt - a shirt, Clarke had made very clear that belonged to her now, that reached just below her butt and exposed her breasts as the first buttons did not close. Her eyebrow lifted instinctively at that scenario.  
  
“Did you go to meet the courier dressed like that?” she asked.  
  
Clarke smiled putting her arms around Lexa's neck. “Maybe...” she murmured. “You know... to get a discount on deliveries.” when she saw the girl's lips curl a bit annoyed, she kissed her softly. “And someone had to take care of what you have left incomplete last night.” she teased.  
  
“Clarke...” Lexa sighed a little embarrassed. “I'm sorry I fell asleep, I w-was exhausted from the journey and the alcohol and-”  
  
Clarke chuckled and closed her lips again with her own, scraping the back of her neck. “Don't panic, I'm kidding.” she sighed placing a sweet kiss on the little pout that had appeared on Lexa's lips.  
  
And it was true, she did not care that Lexa had fallen asleep shortly after she entered into the bedroom, Clarke knew she was tired from her journey and the long weeks of intense work. Sleeping in her arms was more than enough, feeling Lexa's body tight against hers, the warmth of her skin under her fingers and her breath on her neck were definitely enough.  
  
It had been difficult for her to slip out from the torpor of the sheets to go to the gallery.  
  
“What about breakfast? Are you hungry?” she asked peering into those green irises, unable to get away from her.  
  
“And what were you going to prepare?” she asked, pushing Clarke toward the kitchen.  
  
“I don't know, what do you want?” she asked, opening the fridge looking at what was inside. “I do not think there's a great choice, how do you feed yourself, Griffin?” she asked indignantly. “I can hear the echo in here!”  
  
Clarke ran one hand behind her head embarrassed. “I wasn't able to go out and do shopping, I was busy, okay?”  
  
Lexa carefully inspected the drawer of the fridge, pulling out a jar with some fruits. She decided to prepare a macedonia.  
  
“Don't panic.” Lexa mimicked her, repeating the words that Clarke had said earlier. "I'm kidding.”  
  
Clarke rolled her eyes and leaned against the counter, arms crossed under her breasts, watching her with interest. She looked at Lexa grab the cutting board and knife to begin to peel carefully a banana.  
  
“You have not told me a lot about your new exhibition.” she began, staring at her with interest.  
  
Clarke leaned over to reach the banana that Lexa had just cut and she slapped her hand, snatching an adorable little pout from the girl.   
  
“It's going very well, even if I am literally overwhelmed by work.” Clarke said. “I was considering the idea of hiring an assistant, someone to take care of the paperworks so I'm not forced to handle it when my inspiration catches me.”  
  
“I think it's a wonderful idea, Clarke.” Lexa agreed, beginning to peel an apple.  
  
“I really need it, I cannot keep up with everything and now that you're back, I want to be able to spend more time with you.”  
  
“I'm not going anywhere.” she assured her with a small smile. “I know how important your work is but we’ll always find time to be together, I assure you.”  
  
Clarke looked at her tilting her head to the side and smiled. “I hope you don't fall asleep every time we spend time together.” she murmured amused.  
  
“I'd never get away with it, right?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
“Yeah, never.” she replied. “It's almost liberating to make fun of you, you do that adorable pout and I just cannot resist.”  
  
“I noticed.” Lexa chuckled. “But I think it's not just the pout, I am irresistible, in fact, you've almost jumped on me last night on the dance floor.” she pointed out. “Not that I can blame you, I'm super sexy, Griffin, everyone wants a piece of me.” she continued ironically.  
  
Clarke laughed, shaking her head. “I seem to remember your hands under my skirt playing with my garter belt.” she murmured with sensual voice, before leaning towards her to grab a slice of apple. “So I guess you're the one who cannot resists me, Woods.”  
  
Clarke brought the fruit to her mouth and stared at Lexa intently as she closed the lips around her own index while sucking the fruit. Lexa stared at her and then swore in pain, when she slightly cut her fingertip.  
  
“Damn!” she cursed and dropped the knife on the cutting board to control the damage.  
  
It was not anything serious, even if some blood was coming out; before she could do anything, Clarke joined her, observing the cut with concern.  
  
“Be careful.” she said.  
  
“I g-got distracted.” Lexa said. “It's nothing, Clarke, it's just a scratch.”  
  
“What did I tell you? Irresistible.” she chuckled giving her a kiss on her palm.  
  
Lexa stared at her for a long time and she did not fully understand why, but that gesture made her heart tremble. There was a reverence in Clarke's eyes that made her tremble uncontrollably, so she leaned toward and closed her lips to catch her mouth.  
  
It was a deep kiss, a kiss full of promises and expectations.  
  
Clarke liked the way she was discovering Lexa piece by piece, the wonderful woman who was hiding behind the facade that she had created for the world. Clarke knew she had discovered Lexa's heart under her impenetrable armor and she was certain that Lexa was giving everything she owned.  
  
When they parted, Clarke was lost in her green eyes and knew.  
  
She knew what Lexa was trying to tell her.   
  
Clarke’s mouth closed sensual on her cut and she sucked, forcing Lexa to close her eyes for a second. When her teeth were added to that scenario, Lexa found herself slowly opening her eyes again and drowning into those blue irises. She did not say a word, she just watched Clarke swipe her own finger along the half-covered valley of her breasts and Lexa swallowed at the feeling of that warm skin.  
  
“You can touch me...” Clarke muttered softly.  
  
Lexa bit her lower lip, but did not move, unsure how to behave. They had a close encounter on the dance floor and there had been chafing when they were back at home but in that moment she had no idea what to do.  
  
“Touch me.” she encouraged her and, without another word, Clarke made her close the palm of her hand on her left breast. “Lexa, I want you to touch me.”  
  
Lexa took a shaky breath and moved her hand, squeezing that breast and moving the thumb over the nipple still covered by the bra. She was rewarded with a moan. Clarke's hand tightened on hers, urging Lexa to deepen those caresses, urging Lexa to explore her body and the only thing the girl could do was obey. She drew her closer to her, sighing at the feeling of that warm body against hers. Clarke's eyes remained still for a long moment, her lips parted while Lexa was caressing her slowly, taking all the time she needed to venerate that wonderful woman she had the good fortune to finally tighten in her arms again.  
  
Clarke caught her in a demanding kiss, wrapping her arms around Lexa's shoulders, taking her breath away. “Take me to the bedroom.” she whispered on her lips, pushing her slightly backwards to force Lexa's legs to obey her sweet command.  
  
With stunted and awkward steps, Lexa reached the bedroom, stopping only when the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed and Clarke's hands pushed her, inviting her to sit. Separating from those lips was like separating her from the only source of oxygen. Lexa looked up to meet those blue eyes. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever the luck to look at. She could not believe that Clarke really wanted her. They stared at each other for a long moment, then Clarke leaned over her and Lexa stepped back on the mattress. She allowed Clarke to settle down on her lap, each leg on either side of Lexa's hips.  
  
“Touch me, Lexa.” she prodded again, taking her hands and carrying them on her uncovered thighs.  
  
Lexa did not think twice this time, she ran her fingers over the warm skin, touching her sensually with her eyes still fixed on Clarke's beautiful face. Clarke smiled softly, stroking her own belly, going up towards the unopened buttons and when she licked her lips she started to dissolve them slowly under Lexa's stare.  
  
Clarke slipped the fabric along her shoulders and threw her shirt on the floor, giving Lexa's eyes free access to her chest wrapped into a black lace bra. This time Clarke had no need to say anything, Lexa's hands ran down her thighs and up her back, to draw Clarke closer, her mouth found her breast and began to kiss the skin.  
  
“Take it off...” Clarke whispered.  
  
The girl's fingers were quick to execute that sweet command, freeing her breasts and removing the bra that ended forgotten on the bed. Lexa stared at her intently for a long moment, as if she was waiting for her consent and Clarke took her head, leading Lexa where she needed her the most. Lexa’s mouth moved on the whole contour and her tongue slowly stroked the nipple, tearing a strangled gasp from Clarke. Lexa moaned on that soft flesh, feeling Clarke's fingers squeeze her hair, pulling it sensually before letting her go and frantically tugging Lexa's shirt, trying to take it off.  
  
As soon as the garment was abandoned on the floor, Lexa's mouth returned to devour the inviting breasts. Clarke's fingernails scratched her neck while Lexa tasted, bit and sucked all that her lips could reach, running her hands over that wonderful back in slow and sensual caresses. Clarke's fingers clasped her wrists, dragging her hands down, Lexa took the hint, grabbing her ass possessively, while Clarke's pelvis went down in a slow wave to meet hers and they groaned together.  
  
Then Clarke completely lost her mind, she put a hand on her chest, pushing Lexa backward to make her lie on the bed, before removing, in one motion, shorts and panties, throwing them away without any regard before doing the same with hers. When she reached back, she could not avoid passing her wet center on Lexa's thigh, making her moan loudly. Clarke closed her mouth, running her hands along Lexa's body, before going down to bite her neck, heading for the nipples to suck them greedily.  
  
“Clarke...” Lexa gasped, running her fingers through Clarke's hair and trying to get her up. “Come here.” she begged. Clarke raised her eyes to look at her, without taking her mouth away, and smiled on her flesh, watching her with her eyes bright with passion. “Come here, I wa-want ...”  
  
At the sound of her voice so needy, Clarke licked her nipple for the last time and then she moved up her body, making sure to rub her wet sex on the thigh, before holding her forehead against hers. Lexa wasted no time in capturing her lips in a hungry kiss, lifting her thigh and pressing it between Clarke's. She smiled against her lips, only to find herself groan when Clarke took revenge by repeating her gesture.  
  
“God, Clarke. You're so... “ she breathed on her lips, pressing her thigh against her sex, making her moan. “For me?” she asked in a small voice.  
  
Clarke took her face in her hands, stealing a long kiss full of sweetness. “Only for you, Lexa.” she whispered breathlessly, eyes shining with passion.  
  
Lexa found herself swallowing, while unexpected tears stung the corners of her eyes. Overwhelmed she dived Clarke's lips again, deciding to keep her mouth occupied, before something she was not ready to say could escape, something that Clarke was not ready to hear either.  
  
Clarke's hips became more insistent. “And you, Lexa?” asked in a small voice. “Are you wet?" she asked on Lexa's lips, kissing her passionately.  
  
Lexa nodded and, without another word, grabbed her ass hard and pushed their pelvis closer, making sure their sexes met with force and decision, Clarke opened her eyes completely speechless.  
  
“You're so wet...” Clarke gasped leaning her forehead against hers, pushing the pelvis forward and letting their wetness slip together.  
  
“Oh God...” she moaned.  
  
Clarke was completely overwhelmed, she felt so exposed and Lexa’s sex against hers was something she’d never imagined: wet, warm and soft. Lexa moved her hips and moaned, directly in her ear, one of her hands closed on Clarke's buttock with the intention of getting her closer.  
  
“I want to feel you closer.” Lexa gasped, licking her ear.  
  
Clarke did not think twice: she took Lexa's free hand and moved it over her head, clasping her waist with one arm to attract her against her. She continued to move her pelvis and their clits rubbed with every movement, slipping on one other and creating a delicious friction. Clarke was drunk with sensations, Lexa's breath against her lips, their wet sexes touching each other in the deepest way possible and their hearts beating as one.  
  
“God...” she gasped, closing her mouth on Lexa's collarbone that made her crazy from the first time Clarke had seen her.  
  
“Clarke, you're so-oh...”  
  
Lexa laced their fingers and when Clarke's hips sank forcefully against hers, Lexa decided that their clasped fingers were the only thing that prevented her from losing her mind.  
  
“How am I, Lexa?” Clarke asked between gasps. “Tell me how I am.” she demanded, biting her ear, moving the hips in deeper thrusts, determined not to miss a single feeling and she wanted Lexa to feel everything.  
  
Lexa rolled her eyes, overwhelmed, clenching her fingers on Clarke's ass and she met her thrusts.  
  
“Yes, y-you are so hot.” finally she managed to pant, tracing with one hand Clarke's spine in a passionate caress. “And wonderful.” she muttered. Clarke kissed her with transport, letting her tongue slip into her mouth in slow caresses. “Don't stop.” Lexa pleaded bringing her hand on her butt and arching to meet Clarke's thrusts.   
  
Clarke gave her a little kiss on the lips, smiling as she wanted to reassure her she had not the intention of stopping. Lexa's movements became more rapid and frantic, while the passion consumed her.  
  
“You drive me crazy.” Clarke gasped, biting her shoulder, before licking the small mark that was left on the skin.  
  
They continued to move but Clarke wanted more, she wanted it to never end. She wanted more, she wanted to get lost in Lexa, in the sweet scent of her skin, in the way her lips parted and pronounced her name in a sweet prayer. Lexa let out a little cry and arched her back; Clarke instinctively held her without breaking contact and she moved the hips with more frenzy. She closed her lips on one of Lexa's nipples, tenderly biting, growling when her nails scratched her ass in an attempt to attract her closer.  
  
Clarke continued to dedicate her attentions to her breast, until she felt Lexa tremble slightly in her arms. “Come, Lexa... come for me.” she murmured.  
  
Lexa nodded, pushing towards her. “I want you to come with me...” she begged.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes and rested her forehead against Lexa’s, noses touching and she pushed, enjoying Lexa’s flushed face. She held firm her hips and began hitting her center again and again. When Lexa's fingers closed with force on her ass, letting her know she was close, Clarke became more frantic, closing her mouth on her shoulder, sucking it hard. Lexa arched her spine, throwing her head back and letting out a scream, while her sex began to pulse in the release.

Lexa's nails dug into her skin, holding her close as she let herself go to the waves of the orgasm that was shaking her body. Clarke lost herself watching her, her eyes wide with passion, her lips puffy because of all the kisses. Suddenly the orgasm caught Clarke too, inundating every cell of her body, while the frantic throbbing of her sex started to stir. They abandoned exhausted one against the other, lips, once again, on the other, brushing between gasps. Lexa chuckled when she felt Clarke's hips starting to move again.  
  
“Something tells me that you are not done yet” she smiled between gasps, running her fingers on Clarke’s back.  
  
“With you? Never.” Clarke gasped on her lips.  
  
Lexa sighed happily at those words and she put her other hand on Clarke’s ass, squeezing it strongly and pushing it toward her, earning another groan. “Come up...” she murmured to her lips and when she saw Clarke looking at her with a raised eyebrow, she smiled mischievously. “Come up...” she repeated. “I have not had a chance to taste you and I want to so much.”  
  
It took a while for Clarke to understand her intentions but when Lexa slid to the bottom of the bed, urging her to do the opposite, she realized perfectly what she wanted. She bit her lower lip and went along, going up on Lexa's body, slowly, letting the girl enjoy her wet sex along her skin. She kept moving, until she settled on Lexa's face, open and wet, simply waiting for her next move. Clarke saw Lexa watching her with hungry eyes, then she settled better, caressing her ass and, without anticipation, Lexa ran her tongue along Clarke's sex.  
  
Clarke's hips shot forward, she rested her hands against the wall, bending her back so that her sex was completely on Lexa's face. She groaned deeply when that tongue she had dreamed of for months, made her way to her folds and then up to her clit. Clarke threw her head back, biting her lower lip, her breasts moving up and down, while Lexa, below her, worked between her legs, moving towards her folds, caressing it with her tongue making her moan loudly.  
  
“Inside...” Clarke begged.  
  
The tip of that hot tongue separated her folds gently, slipping in softly before getting back, Clarke's hips snapped to pursue it, in seek of some relief.  
  
“Lexa...” she prayed snapping her hands in those dark curls, squeezing and pulling it against her.  
  
Lexa's teeth gently closed on her clit, snatching a surprised scream from Clarke. “What?” she asked in a hoarse voice, then the tongue moved back throughout her sex, making sure to tickle the folds with the tip.  
  
“Please.” Clarke gasped, pushing her hips back against Lexa's face, one hand on the wall looking for support, the other tight in her hair, as if she was afraid that Lexa could escape, she looked down to meet those green eyes  
  
“You're making fun of m-AH!” Clarke threw her head back overwhelmed, when finally Lexa's tongue slid inside of her.  
  
Clarke pushed her hips to meet that sweet invasion, trying to attract Lexa as much as possible inside of her. Lexa's hands tightened her hips, guiding her movements, while her mouth made sounds on her wet sex, mingling with Clarke's moans. Clarke’s orgasm surprised her, she arched her back in pleasure, while her inner walls throbbed around Lexa's tongue, trapping her around her folds. She collapsed forward, her head resting against the cool wall, in search of relief from the heat that hit her in waves. She twisted into a spasm, when Lexa's tongue started moving inside of her, overloading her sex. She lifted her hips, moving away from that impertinent and talented mouth, planting her eyes in those green irises.  
  
“Oh, so haven’t you finished with me yet?” she asked playfully. “Good.” she murmured with lustful voice, rising and turning slowly, making sure that Lexa did not miss a single movement. “Because I certainly have not finished with you.” she said, slipping on her body kissing her abdomen up and down until she reached the treasure between Lexa's thighs.  
  
Clarke moaned as she laid an open kiss directly on her sex, humming happily when she heard Lexa moaning. Clarke had missed that taste and she could not help but bury her face deeper between her thighs. Lexa did not make her wait long to do the same thing, passing the tongue through her sex, making Clarke whimper when she reached her folds. Clarke pulled away for a moment to lean on Lexa's thigh and she groaned loud, when the girl's fingers began to slowly caress her clit, while the tongue made in and out.  
  
“Lexa... _fuck.”_ she groaned loudly closing her eyes.  
  
When she felt Lexa's smile on her skin, she picked up where she had stopped, closing her lips directly on her clit and sucking it hard.  
  
“More.” Lexa groaned, following her example. Clarke began to move the tongue in slow, deliberate circles, while her fingers went to tease her entrance. “Clarke...”  
  
Clarke's hips snapped, feeling Lexa's long fingers make their way into her, slow but relentless, sinking to the knuckle before retreating with the same deliberate slowness. “God, Lexa!” she shouted.  
  
Clarke decided that the time to play was over: she dived in that wet sex passing the tongue for the entire length.  
  
“Oh, shit!”  
  
“Stop cursing and go back to work, Miss Woods.” Clarke prodded putting in her tongue, pushing hard and stroking all the right places inside of Lexa.   
  
Lexa began to move quickly in and out, delighted by the groans Clarke was doing on her clit, she gasped when she felt the girl's fingers work their way toward her entrance.  
  
“AH!” Lexa cried, feeling her inner muscles squeeze to that wonderful invasion.  
  
It took only a couple of deep thrusts and she felt Clarke come undone, her forehead against the mattress and the bottom lip between her teeth, while her hips snapped against Lexa's mouth. When Clarke came down from her orgasm, she began to move her fingers, inside and out, sinking firmly into Lexa, again and again, as her lips sucked, bit and licked her clit.  
  
“Clarke... god... _Clarke, Clarke_.”   
  
Hearing her name coming out from Lexa's lips again and again, forced Clarke to speed up her movements, sucking hard and sticking firmly the fingers inside of her.  
  
“Come for me, Lexa.” she whispered and then moaned on her sex.  
  
That vibration was enough to send Lexa over the edge, making her arch, while her fingers were clawing the warm body on top of her and her muscles twitched, trapping Clarke's fingers inside. Clarke's tongue kept caressing her gently, until Lexa's body did not relax. She groaned in surprise, when the fingers inside of her started moving again.  
  
“Clarke, wh-AH!” almost beyond her control, her hips moved to meet those thrusts.  
  
A gush of hot wetness invested Clarke's fingers when, after a few thrusts, Lexa's body twisted in a long spasm of pleasure, while with hoarse voice she called her name. Clarke wasted no time and went to collect what Lexa was offering her, tasting it and enjoying the greedy little spasms that shook Lexa’s body with each stroke of her tongue. Lexa let herself go exhausted on the sheets, eyes closed and breathing hard but she clearly felt Clarke's body crawling towards her, kissing all the skin in her way. She sighed with happiness when the girl's lips found hers in a gentle caress, before going down to her neck, heading to her breasts.  
  
“Clarke... are you still not satisfied?” she asked amused. “I'm not sure I can handle another round, I need a little time to recover.”  
  
“Don't worry, I'll give you all the time you need, old woman.” Clarke mocked her, resting her head on Lexa's shoulder to look at her.  
  
Lexa finally opened her eyes and got lost in Clarke’s, she smiled when she saw the wetness on Clarke's cheeks and mouth and she could not resist, she bent down to kiss her gently, tasting herself on her lips.  
  
“Uhhh... I'm hungry.” Clarke sighed plaintively.  
  
“Me too, someone interrupted our breakfast.” she teased.  
  
“You did not complain that much about it.” she replied playfully slapping her chest, before slipping out of bed completely naked and ready to get to the kitchen. “Do you want anything?”  
  
Lexa watched her with hungry eyes, while Clarke ran through the bedroom door. She was proud of the signs that her hands had left on that white skin. “Anything edible will be fine.” she replied when her empty stomach let out a growl of protest.  
  
Lexa stretched, throwing her head on the pillow to look at the ceiling. Hearing Clarke move into the kitchen made her sigh, smiling at the pleasant numbness that was beginning to invade her body. When Clarke sat on her lap, Lexa got up to meet her lips in a gentle kiss.  
  
“Hi.” Clarke murmured happy.  
  
“Hi to you, are you getting something good?” she asked, kissing her back.  
  
“Close your eyes.” she ordered gently, biting Lexa's lower lip.  
  
For a long moment Lexa stared at the sly twinkle in her blue eyes and then she did. Clarke kissed her again, then she ran the tongue over her lips, inviting her to open them.  
  
“Bite."” she whispered.  
  
“Bread sticks and Nutella?” Lexa asked opening her eyes and chewing tastefully, while Clarke nodded biting the breadsticks.  
  
“Breakfast of Champions.” Lexa said when Clarke handed back the breadsticks covered with hazelnut cream.  
  
“I thought that the breakfast of champions was the one we had consumed a little while ago...” Clarke said amused.  
  
Lexa laughed licking her lips. “You're a tease, Griffin.” she said watching her move naked on her lap.  
  
Clarke raised an eyebrow and continued to feed her, alternating food and a sweet kiss, before repeating the operation again and again. Lexa watched every move and when she leaned forward to reach the next breadstick, a bit of Nutella fell on her chest.  
  
“Oh, look at that.” Clarke muttered amused, bending down to pick it up with the tip of her tongue.  
  
Lexa sighed softly, her hand on top of Clarke's head. “You are insatiable.” she mumble, Clarke said nothing, she just reached her breast and began to bite. “You'll be the death of me.” Lexa gasped when the girl's mouth closed over her nipple and she threw her head back.  
  
  
  
Lexa muttered something incomprehensible in her arms and Clarke held her more tight, letting her lips slip on Lexa's bare shoulder.  
  
“Hmmm?” she asked without interrupting the attention she was giving to her skin, merely moving her lips and stroking the tattoo that ran down Lexa's spine.  
  
“I told you.” Lexa mumbled sleepily. “I really hope you do not want to start again or tomorrow I will need a wheelchair to be able to go to the office.” Clarke chuckled, leaving a trail of little bites along her shoulder blade, as her fingers touched the tattoo on her arm. “I'm serious, Clarke.” she wailed with weary voice. “I need a break.”  
  
“Shhh.” she whispered, her lips on Lexa's ear, she smiled seeing her shiver at that contact. “Don't worry, for now I consider myself satisfied.” she muttered hoarsely but she could not prevent herself from pressing her pelvis against that ass. “Rest.” she whispered tenderly kissing her ear.  
  
It did not take long for Lexa's breath tobecome slow and regular, Clarke allowed herself to cuddle that warm body abandoned in her arms, Lexa's head was hidden on her neck and Clarke could smell her skin. It did not take long for Clarke to fall asleep exhausted as well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is Naughty Girl by Beyoncé
> 
> See you next chapter ;)


	19. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're almost there guys, another chapter and epilogue.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Chapter 18**

  
  
Anya had pointed out more than once Lexa’s change, as well as many of her employees, who often stopped to chat with her in front of the elevators, instead of greeting her with a nod and lowering the head intimidated.

She was happy.  
  
For the first time in many years, Alexandria Woods was really happy and it was all thanks to the girl that she was looking at with eyes full of love at that moment. Lexa had reached the gallery after work and sat with her computer to attend extra work, while Clarke ended some of her paintings. The exhibition was approaching and Clarke was revved up, eager to finish everything as soon as possible; that was the reason why she had been forced to tell Lexa, she would remain in the studio for the entire weekend, Lexa had not thought twice to join her.   
  
She did not care to stay just to watch Clarke painting for hours, the only thing she cared about was to be able to spend some quality time with her. And it was what she was doing: staring at her from her position waiting for the take-away dinner. Clarke was beautiful: her hair done up in a braid, her face dirty with color, the salopette that, like the first time she had seen her, did not cover much. Lexa could clearly see the black lace bra through the side neckline and the matching panties every time Clarke bent forward to examine a detail.   
  
She was brought back to reality by the light knock at the door and she stood up, trying to regain her composure and stop her heart from beating frantically in her chest. She reached for the money in her wallet and gave them to the delivery guy, before taking the bag without waiting for the change and then she went back into the studio. Clarke was watching the canvas with thoughtful expression, a brush in her mouth and her arms crossed on her chest. She sighed with happiness as she felt Lexa's warm chest squeeze against her back and her lips touch her cheek tenderly.

“Why don’t you take a break?” she asked in a soft voice. “Eat something and then start again.”

“In a while.” she assured her. “I need to finish some details before they get out of my mind.”  
  
Lexa nodded gently kissing her bare shoulder, smiling when she heard Clarke sigh in her arms and, unable to control herself, she turned to unite her mouth with Clarke’s in a gentle kiss. It was when Lexa's hands slipped into the salopette and went down to the legs in a gentle cares that Clarke sighed in her arms.

“Lexa...” she murmured on her lips trying to hold back a moan when Lexa's fingers reached her thighs. “I have to finish here otherwise, _ohh…_ ” she bit her lip as the fingers went to her covered sex before quickly stepping away.  
  
“Hurry up then.” Lexa said before removing her hand. “Or dinner will become cold.” she gave her another kiss on her bare shoulder and untied her from the embrace.

Clarke took a shaky breath and tried to recover her mental faculties, staring at the painting in front of her. A smile appeared on her lips when she realized what she needed in order to make the painting perfect and she had to thank Lexa for that. That exhibition would have been great, the springboard of her career and she wanted everything to be perfect. She grabbed the brush and picked up where she had stopped, feeling Lexa clearly move across the studio preparing everything for the dinner.  
  
She spent at least another twenty minutes in what she was doing but when it was over she considered herself absolutely satisfied with her work. Clarke smiled at the painting and she put down the brush before switching her sweaty forehead, regardless of the color strips that were left on her skin. When she turned, Lexa was busy reading some document, so she decided not to disturb her. Clarke walked to the bathroom to wash her hands quickly and to finally enjoy the dinner that her girlfriend had ordered.

Her girlfriend.  
  
It was still so unreal to think about Lexa in those terms, especially if she remembered how things had been different at the beginning. When they met in that same gallery, they were married, at least on paper, but they were two unknown and complete different pe ople . After five months, Clarke had understood that she could not live without Lexa in her life and she was sure that Lexa felt the same way .  When she returned to the studio, Lexa looked up and smiled and Clarke's heart jumped, just as it did every time the woman addressed her that kind of attention. Clarke bent down to kiss her softly and took her place beside Lexa, watching hungrily what the girl had ordered.   
  
“I think it has cooled down.” she said. “I can warm it up if you like.”

Clarke shook her head and put her hand, which was still a little dirty with painting, on Lexa. “Everything is perfect.” Clarke assured her.

And when Lexa laced her fingers with hers, she realized how much that sentence was true.  
  
  
****

Even in her wildest dreams Clarke could not think she will ever be sitting in the driving seat in a Aston Martin db5, but here she was, staring at the road in front of her. She could not believe that Lexa had allowed her to drive her car, although technically, she had not driven yet and the tension she saw in the woman's face made clear what Lexa was actually feeling. She settled the rear view mirror, pressed the clutch, turned the key in the ignition, pulled the handbrake and prepared to go, feeling Lexa’s shaky breath at her side. When the car began to move slowly, Clarke squealed with happiness, jumping happily on the seat.  
  
“Clarke, I beg you to concentrate.” Lexa said, the voice full of tension, wondering again why she agreed to such a thing.  
  
After her father's death, no one had had the privilege of getting into that car, much less in the driving seat and she wondered if love had really made her so weak that she could not say no to Clarke in any way. They were in a relationship for over nine months and Lexa knew that Clarke was holding her in her hand.  
  
“This car is wonderful, Lexa.” Clarke said, driving around the parking lot like a real professional.  
  
“Do you hear the noise the engine makes? It's a gem!”  
  
“I know.” Lexa said.  
  
But when the car jumped forward, her hand instinctively ran to the handbrake, ready to pull it at any time, even if the parking lot was completely empty.  
  
“It was one of my father's cars, I had to wait years to have the privilege to even be able to get in.”  
  
“It took me only a couple of hours and a few kisses to convince you.” Clarke chuckled.  
  
“And I'm regretting it.” she muttered under her breath, her eyes widened when Clarke turned to her, removing her eyes from the road. “Look forward!” she begged.  
  
Clarke looked back at what she was doing, glancing at the hand with which Lexa was holding tight the handbrake and smacked her lips annoyed. “Take away your hand from there, Lexa.” she warned. “Although I don't have a car, this does not make me a bad driver.”  
  
“When was the last time you drove, Clarke?” Lexa asked, her body completely stretched.  
  
“Not so long ago.” she lied shamelessly.  
  
When she saw Lexa's jaw tighten Clarke decided to take a little revenge: why did Lexa let her drive her car if she did not trust her skills? Clarke stared at her with one eye and then swerved abruptly, skidding into the parking lot and Lexa could not hold back the cry of desperation that came from her lips.  
  
“Clarke!” she exclaimed when the girl stopped the car and turned off the engine.  
  
“Why did you give me your permission to drive your car if you do not trust me, Lexa?” she asked, crossing the arms over her chest.  
  
Lexa straightened her shoulders starting to answer but when she saw the look of disappointment on Clarke's face, she sighed heavily and deflated like a balloon.  
  
“I do trust you, Clarke.” she said immediately. “But this is one of the few things that my father left me and I am very attached to it.” she explained. “And... I'm not used to leave my things in others’ hands.”  
  
Clarke smiled slightly and took Lexa's hand in hers bringing it to her lips to pour a little kiss, making her sigh of happiness.  
  
“Then let me do it.” she said. “I asked you to take me to an empty parking lot for a reason, Lexa, I knew how much you're attached to the car and I did not want anything to happen to it. I promise that I will use this car with respect.” she assured her. “Do you remember what I told you in Paris when you painted the bottle for Anya? I will drive this car like I were touching a lover that I haven't seen in a long time.”  
  
“I'm unbearable.” Lexa admitted, shaking her head.  
  
“Nah, you just... what does Anya say?”  
  
“That I have a broom stuck constantly in the backside.”  
  
Clarke laughed. “I'm sure that her words were not so thin but I won’t ask you to repeat them.” she assured her, kissing the palm of her hand again. “Can we start again? Do you trust me?”  
  
Lexa nodded and tried to relax. “I do trust you.”  
  
And she meant it, she trusted Clarke blindly. Clarke smiled restarting the car and enjoying the confidence that Lexa was giving her.   
  
  
****  
  
Clarke sighed, resting her head on Lexa's shoulder as they walked across Lafayette Square, in the crowd on Sunday afternoon. It was the first weekend, after Clarke's second exhibition, that they finally spent together without any kind of interruption. Lexa had even turned off the phone that she used for her work emergencies and she had assured Clarke that there would be no interruption. The second exhibition went very well, Clarke was happy to see people buy the paintings with interest and she had even received some private commissions by a few highly placed gentlemen. Lexa had told her more than once during the evening, as she held her to her chest, how proud of her she was and how her paintings were marvelous.  
  
Clarke had appreciated those compliments and when five people had bought her paintings in the amount of sixty thousand dollars, Clarke had dragged Lexa out all night and they made love until, exhausted, they fell asleep. Lexa had brought her out to celebrate the night after the exhibition and she had continued to reward Clarke for her talent in various ways, until Friday night, when she had given her the good news: she would take a week off to spend alone with her.  
  
“I cannot believe that I will have you for me all week.” Clarke murmured rubbing her nose in her neck.  
  
Lexa smiled and kissed her head. “We've both been working a lot in the recent months, we deserve a break and I wanted to propose you something.” she began. “My father's family has a house on Lake Alexandria for generations, legally it belongs to my uncle Titus but for most of the year it remains unused.” she explained.  
  
Clarke's eyes lit up at Lexa’s words: she still remembered perfectly the summers when her parents rented a house and a boat right on the lake and they spanned there all summer holidays before returning to school.  
  
“I was thinking we could go there for this week of holiday. Me, you, the lake and a beautiful boat... alone.” she whispered, rubbing her nose against hers.  
  
Before Clarke could actually answer, she felt a vibration coming from the inside pocket of Lexa's jacket that made the girl snort loudly and after she apologized with her eyes, Clarke saw her grab the phone. Lexa knew that it was Anya, she was the only person who would write at that time and she was sure Anya would not write her if it was not important. She quickly read the text and her brow furrowed with concern, thus attracting Clarke's gaze.  
  
“Is everything okay?” she asked.  
  
“Yes, I think so.”  
  
Clarke raised an eyebrow. “Do you think?” she asked.  
  
Lexa read again the text and replied quickly, before putting the phone back in her pocket and slipping her hand into Clarke's, as if she needed something to hold onto.  
  
“Lexa?”  
  
“It was Anya.” she said. “She sent me a text, she asked if this holiday week I can cut a bit of time for her. She and Raven have something important to tell me.”  
  
“I see...” she said. “And why do you have this worried face?”  
  
It was not the first time, and probably not the last, in which the two would be joining them, Clarke did not care much, she appreciated their company and she knew perfectly well that Lexa would be alone with her once they had closed the door behind. But there was something in her green eyes that made Clarke realize that there was something wrong.  
  
“I have a bad feeling, Clarke.” Lexa said, biting her lower lip. “Anya was strange in the last few months and I saw her and Raven discuss more than once in her office.” she continued. “And I know that I probably should have investigated but I've been busy and now I feel an horrible friend and-”  
  
“Lexa, calm down, I'm sure it's nothing serious.” she tried to reassure her.  
  
She could not know that it was nothing serious, she did not know Anya and Raven so well but they could not be both catastrophic, one of them had to be optimistic.  
  
“What if they are thinking about divorce?” she asked with panic in her voice. “Raven never came so often in the office as in this last few months and last night during the exhibition they were so tense and distant...” she ran a hand through her hair. “Oh God, Clarke, they are getting a divorce and they’re asking me to-”  
  
Clarke put a finger on her lips to stop the ocean of words, she took Lexa's face in her hands and stared intently into her eyes.  
  
“Okay, let's not get ahead of ourselves." she said softly. “Anya and Raven are the most loving couple I've ever seen in my entire life, Lexa, it's really hard to believe they're getting a divorce.”  
  
Lexa's eyebrows furrowed and she finally sighed heavily, closing her eyes. “I'm unbearable.” she muttered.  
  
That was a sentence that she repeated over and over in recent times and Clarke found her absolutely adorable, so she leaned over to kiss her gently and stroke the back of her head.  
  
“How do you put up with me?” Lexa asked rhetorically.  
  
“Sometimes you can be unbearable but you also have many other qualities.” she said with a smile. “Like your hands that are able to create magic with numbers.”  
  
“Only with numbers?” she asked mischievously.  
  
Clarke rolled her eyes, pretending to be annoyed, while scratching the back of her head. “I gladly accept your proposal to spend the week at the lake.” she said. “And how about you invite them? I'm sure that having a quieter place to talk won’t displease them.”  
  
“It might be an idea.” Lexa agreed thoughtfully. “Anya has always loved that house and I think they would be happy to spend the weekend there.” she stroked her arms gently. “Are you sure that you are okay with this?”  
  
Clarke nodded, smiling at her reassuringly, before intertwining her fingers with Lexa’s and inviting her to restart their walk. Lexa sighed heavily, letting Clarke lead her but her thoughts were still fixed on her friends.  
  
“Okay, sulky.” Clarke said, after a few minutes spent walking in silence. “I cannot see you with that face in such a beautiful day.” she said placing a little kiss on the corner of her lips. “Wait here, I’ll go get an ice cream.”  
  
Lexa gave her a small smile, unable to resist the gentle pressure of Clarke's lips on her skin. “Sorry.” she murmured. “And I do not need an ice cream, I'm fi-”  
  
Clarke's lips silenced her again with a kiss. “I told you to wait for me here.” she ordered in a hoarse whisper against her mouth and then she turned away toward the ice cream van.

Lexa followed her with her eyes, a small smile on the lips and it was then that her gaze lingered on a child nearby. She tilted her head to the side when she saw the concern on his face and she could not avoid herself to approach to see what worried him. Children unleashed emotions in her that she was not able to hold back and seeing that little man with the look distressed made her worry.  
  
“Is everything alright? I see that you’re quite concerned.” she asked gently.  
  
The boy turned to her for a long moment and then his eyes returned to the tree directed in front of him, as he let out a sigh. Lexa followed his gaze and a small smile appeared on her lips when she saw a kite caught in the branches.  
  
“That's a big mess.” Lexa began. “Where are your parents?” she asked.  
  
“I cannot talk to strangers.” he finally answered.  
  
“You're right, I'm really careless.” Lexa smiled quickly undoing her jacket. “My name is Lexa, nice to meet you. “ she introduced herself cordially.  
  
“I'm Jeremy.” he muttered. “My dad went to buy ice cream and my mom took my brother to the bathroom, I wa-was playing but I lost control of the kite and it got stuck.” he said in despair. “My mom will get so angry, she had just bought me that.”  
  
“Not if we take it in time before she comes back.” she assured him as she slipped off her jacket. “Would you hold me this?” she asked, Jeremy nodded and watched her roll up her sleeves up to the elbows. “Let's see...” Lexa murmured reflecting on where to put her feet so she did not risk to fall.  
  
She approached the tree and climbed up fast, paying attention and holding firmly to the branches. It did not take long to reach the kite under Jeremy's admiring gaze, who was looking at her with his mouth half open: he would never have thought of seeing a girl with such agility to climb up a tree. Lexa returned on her feet quickly and proudly she gave the kite to the owner.   
  
Jeremy gave her a smile so bright that could turn up the whole square. “Thank you!” Jeremy said. “Thank you, Miss Lexa, y-you were very kind I-”  
  
“I am happy to have helped you. Wait, let me fix this.” she said carefully adjusting the angle.  
  
When the mother returned, Lexa walked away, she put her finger on the lips and made him a wink, as they walked away.  
  
Clarke had observed all that show with her heart in an uproar and all the emotions, she had been trying to contain, were emerging as a river. She was not sure that Lexa was ready to hear what it was waving in her chest but then she knew she was no longer able to suppress them.  
  
“Hey!” Lexa said approaching with a sweet smile. “You ran away before I could tell you my favorite ice cream.” she pointed out. “But little Jeremy has entertained me, his kite was stuck in the branches and I helped him to- Clarke, are you okay?”  
  
“God, I love you.”  
  
Lexa froze and Clarke just stared at her intensely, her eyes bright with emotion.  
  
“I love you, Alexandria Woods.” she repeated softly. “I love the way you cannot say no to a child, I love the way you are passionate about your work, I love the way you pout when you're not perfect and when we have to go somewhere, I love the way you look at me, I love the way you kiss me, I love the way you make love to me, I just love you, I love you so much.”  
  
Lexa suddenly found herself without air in her lungs and this caused her to gasp looking for a bit of oxygen, while the words Clarke has just told swirled in her mind.  
  
Clarke loved her.  _ **God, Clarke loved her...  
  
**_ The words, however, did not seem willing to come out of her lips and Lexa did the only thing she was able to do. She leaned over and held Clarke tightly, indifferent of the ice cream that completely smeared her shirt and she closed her lips on Clarke's. Clarke whined by surprise and kissed her back with equal passion, feeling Lexa's hands stroke her back with a reverence that she had never felt before. When Lexa finally released her lips to catch a breath, Clarke saw her moist eyes and one tear slipped down her cheek.  
  
“Lexa...”  
  
“You have no idea how much I love you, Clarke, you have no idea...” she whispered in a broken voice.  
  
Clarke smiled softly and kissed her again, forgetting the rest of the world, just as it happened every time they were together.  
  
  
****  
  
If Anya had to give a name to that evening, strange would be an understatement.  
  
When she had received the invitation to the lake house, where she and Lexa had spent most of their carefree and happy holidays in Costia and Raven's company, she could not refuse. She had always loved that place, it had been an important part of her adolescence and she had thought that facing the speech in that place could certainly help her, this was before she saw the strange way in which Lexa was behaving. When they arrived, Clarke had welcomed them with a bright smile. She and Raven had started talking of the exhibition, leaving Anya time to speak of the practices that had remained in her hands during Lexa's absence.  
  
But she realized that there was something wrong with Lexa, something that was making her behave in an unusual way and she was distant. She had tried to dismiss the thought, but when, after dinner, instead of remaining at the table with her, Lexa got up to rekindle the fire - which had not the slightest needs to be powered - Anya had realized there was definitively something wrong.  
  
“Lexa, what the hell is wrong with you today?” she asked bluntly.  
  
Lexa looked back at her with a confused look. “Nothing.” she replied frowning. “I'm reviving the fir-”  
  
“Oh come on, I've known you for my entire life, Woods.” Anya snapped waving a hand in the air. “You have that idiot look that you had trimmed throughout all high school when you were telling me lies while you slipped into Costia's underwear.”  
  
“I have not that idiot look!” she defended herself immediately letting go of the poker.  
  
“It reminds me a lot when, in college, Costia had thrown up by mistake on my soccer bag and even if I had told you that it smelled of dead, you had continued to deny.”  
  
Lexa grimaced and before she could answer, Raven and Clarke made their return, coffee and biscuits on a tray and sweet smiles printed on their faces.  
  
“Why has Lexa that idiot look she had when she and Costia, in the rush of taking advantage of the fact that her uncle was not at home to have sex on the couch, broke the vase he adored so much and Mr. Woods blamed us?”  
  
Clarke turned to stare at her with a raised eyebrow as she sat on one of the chairs, Lexa blushed furiously at her words.  
  
“I have no expression!” that was the only thing she could say grabbing her cup of coffee.  
  
“Not to mention the time when they broke the glass of the annex in a hurry of-”  
  
“We're not interest in these details!” Lexa said.  
  
“I'm interested.” Clarke said, leaning toward her. “I feel a little offended actually, you didn't break anything with me.”  
  
Lexa blushed again. “We painted... is not that enough?” she asked in a whisper.  
  
“Hmm, maybe... but I don't think it can compete with the vase and the glass...” she pointed out amused, rubbing her nose against hers.  
  
“We broke the table.” Raven interrupted, taking a cookie to her mouth.  
  
“And the sofa.” Anya said, putting sugar in her coffee.  
  
“Oh yeah, the sofa!” she said amused. “And the chandelier.”  
  
Lexa turned to look at them. “The chandelier? How the hell... no, I do not want to know. “  
  
“I don't mind knowing.” Clarke said with a smile instead. “What? We could take inspiration!”  
  
“We don't want to forget the poor microwave.” Raven chuckled. “God, that time I was afraid that the house was burned up!”"  
  
Anya laughed and suddenly the memories of all the crazy things she had done with her wife began to scroll in front of her eyes like a film. Lexa watched them laugh and her heart squeezed in a grip at the thought of their impending divorce: she had never seen a more perfect couple.  
  
“And what about the time we used the strange swing that your colleague had suggested us and the vessel that was on the terrace almost killed our neighbor?” Anya asked.   
  
“Mr. Thomson has almost sued us!” Raven laughed.  
  
“He had no chance, I would have left him in his underwear.” Anya said in Clarke's direction.  
  
“Please, don't ask for a divorce!”  
  
The words escaped from Lexa's lips before she could stop them and when she realized what she had said, her eyes widened, cursing herself.  
  
“Divorce? Here the only thing that has been divorced is your brain in your skull.” Anya said. “Where the hell do you have pulled out this idea from?”  
  
“It’s been weeks since you and Raven did nothing but discuss in your office.” Lexa said. “And the distant behavior in these weeks? And th-the text you sent me? I need to talk to you? Every time you told me such a thing something bad has happened!”  
  
“Christ, Lexa, you've never been particularly brilliant but love has clearly deteriorated you.” Raven said.  
  
Lexa gasped and Clarke could not help but chuckle, that theater was hilarious.  
  
“And then why all this mystery? Oh God, do you want to change job?” she asked with concern. “It’s because of the pay? Because if it is that we can work it out!”  
  
“Lexa, shut up!”  
  
“I let you work less and I increase your salary but please don't leave!”  
  
“For god’s sake! Raven and I are going to adopt a child! Now shut your mouth!”  
  
Clear and concise. Lexa was crowded out. Of all the things that might have come out from her best friend's mouth, she had not considered that.  
  
“A c-child?” she asked confused.  
  
Well, that was definitely a thing that Lexa had never even thought about and she felt like an idiot for not having done so. She had always known the love that Raven had for children, as she remembered Anya's words, she always wanted to give a home to one of those unfortunate children, she was one of them long time ago.  
  
“Girls, but it's great!” Clarke said.  
  
“It's almost ready, next week we’re going to meet him or her.” Raven said, eyes shining with excitement. “We did not want to say anything until the end but now it's official: we are going to adopt a child.”  
  
Anya had not detached her eyes from her best friend, waiting for a word from her, an opinion, _something_. Finally, when the words reached Lexa's brain, she sighed with relief and a happy smile appeared on her lips.  
  
“A child.” she said again. “That's... wow, Anya, I'm so happy for you!”  
  
“Divorce, Woods? Really?” she asked again. “I make one more step towards being an adult and you get one step closer to dementia.”  
  
Lexa laughed and stood up to go and hold her: she was aware that those jokes were just the way Anya hid the fact that she was actually terrified. Lexa hugged her close, feeling her friend's arms doing the same.  
  
“You'll be a wonderful mother, Anya.” Lexa whispered in her ear.  
  
And if there was one thing stronger than her marriage to Raven, it was certainly that: Anya would have been an extraordinary mother. 

  
****  
  
Clarke sighed in Lexa's embrace, raising her face to the sky where the sun was preparing to rise and she enjoyed the wonderful warmth of her girlfriend. Yes, now it was official, after a year of assiduous attendance, she could say with absolute happiness that she and Lexa had a stable relationship.  
  
“I should go.” she murmured in her ear, kissing her outline. “If I hurry up I can go home and get a few more clothes.”  
  
Clarke closed her eyes, feeling the usual knot in the stomach she had at the thought of seeing her going away, even if for a few hours. It was madness, she knew it, she knew that Lexa would be back that night but the idea that the time they could spend together was instead spent on those trips to her apartment made her grimace.  
  
She was terribly selfish with their time.  
  
“If you had more things here, you would not be forced to sneak away from my arms so soon.” she murmured.  
  
Clarke tried every day in the hope that Lexa would understand her little suggestions but as always Lexa remained silent, she just held her stronger and kissed her bare shoulder.  
  
“I'll go take a shower.” she whispered softly biting her shoulder, before letting her go.  
  
Clarke ran a hand through her hair and walked away from the railing, waving, at least for the moment, the city that was awakening. She knew that the possibility of living together was a thorny issue but Lexa spent more time there than in her own apartment - as demonstrated by the multitude of clothing that was already in Clarke's closet and her personal belongings scattered around the house and in her bathroom - but every time Clarke introduced the topic, Lexa pretended not to hear her.  
  
She walked across the living room and settled Lexa's briefcase on the table, as she walked into the kitchen. It was now customary for Clarke to prepare breakfast and then kiss Lexa on the door, making them promise to come back home as soon as possible. She turned on the radio that she had placed on the kitchen counter, while she initiated the coffee maker and took the ingredients to make pancakes. Although Lexa used to be health-conscious, she never refused to eat pancakes when Clarke was preparing them for her.  
  
“ _ **You can't have my heart and you won't use my mind but do what you want with my body**_.” she hummed moving to the rhythm of Lady Gaga's song, wiggling as she smashed a couple of eggs in a bowl.  
  
She kept moving, banging the eggs and focusing on what she was doing, while the sound of footsteps let her know that Lexa was out of the shower and was ready to go. With the melody still filling the kitchen, Clarke found herself smiling, a sly thought in the mind influenced by the words of the song. Clarke knew she was playing by the rules, she knew that Lexa was coming back later, she knew Lexa would not be able to resist her, not while she was moving her hips in her underwear and bra preparing breakfast.  
  
“Clarke, have you seen my-” the words died in her mouth as soon as she crossed the kitchen door.  
  
The vision of Clarke in that state was one of the most beautiful things Lexa’d ever seen and she had always the same devastating effect on her. Her blonde curly hair falling over her perfect back, her bottom wrapped in those panties that Lexa could not remember so tight and her chest... well, Lexa wondered how her breasts could breathe while they were forced into a fabric so snug.  
  
“It's on the table.”  
  
She answered, looking over her shoulders and fluttering her lashes, then she leaned over to the coffeemaker to turn it off before bending forward - Lexa was sure she did it on purpose - to grab the pan. She poured the pancake batter and pretended to be interested in their cooking, resting her hands on the counter. She moved her hips in the direction of her girlfriend who seemed petrified.  
  
“ _ **Sometimes I'm scared I suppose, if you ever let me go**_.” Clarke hummed, turning back to stare at her. “ _ **I would fall apart, if you break my heart, I know, just take my body...**_ ” and she caressed sensually one of her buttocks. “ _ **And do not stop the party.**_ ”  
  
“Shit, Clarke.” Lexa gasped shaking her head.  
  
She knew that it was all a tactic, something Clarke was doing on purpose to keep her in the apartment a little more, and damn, it was working.  
  
“ _ **You can’t have my heart and you won't use my mind but... Do what you want with my body, Lexa**_.”  
  
Then Lexa took a few steps into the room, undoing the top buttons of her shirt in search of a little of that air that Clarke was taking away from her.  
  
“ _ **Do what you want with my body!”**_ Clarke sang shaking her head from side to side. “ _ **You can't stop my voice cause, you don't own my life but, do what you want with my body.**_ ”  
  
Lexa resigned herself to the evidence that she was going to be late to work and the fact that she wouldn’t even have time to go get some clothes, at least not that morning. So, Lexa pressed her chest against Clarke's back and felt her jump, as her hands went to caress her bare belly.  
  
“I'll burn the breakfast.” Clarke pointed amused.  
  
“As if you cared.” Lexa growled in her ear, reaching out to turn off the stove.  
  
Clarke smiled, she dropped her head forward, while the girl's hands ran down to her thighs, caressing her through the underwear already wet.  
  
“ _ **Do what you want with my body, Lexa.**_ ” she sighed full of expectation.  
  
Lexa growled into her neck and then with a quick gesture she grabbed her by the hips, turning Clarke in her embrace and she closed her mouth. She sat her down on the counter and began to fill her face with kisses, running her tongue along her breasts, biting the skin and then she knelt down. When her mouth landed on her buried treasure, Clarke threw the head back, gripping her hair tightly. While Lexa’s tongue passed between her wet folds, enjoying the way her girlfriend's hips went to meet her mouth, she realized that she did not care much about being late, the important thing was that Clarke did not stop moaning her name.  
  
_***(Lady gaga - Do what U want)  
  
  
**_ ****  
  
Finally they stood in front of their new apartment, watching the closed door with a sweet smile. Clarke let her hand quietly slip into Lexa's, squeezing it tenderly and turning to look at her.  
  
“We're home.” Clarke muttered, staring at her.  
  
In someone else’s eyes that could have been an insignificant thing but to Clarke it was an important achievement, a small step that would finally allow them both to plant the roots of their relationship.  
  
For Clarke, it was everything.  
  
It had taken a bit in order that Lexa was comfortable with that important step and Clarke had realized that the idea of sharing such a small space with another person scared her, so she stopped stressing her out. The thing had worked. Not less than two weeks before, Lexa had slipped into the shower with her and, after having demonstrated intensely and loudly against the tiles of the shower how much she would miss Clarke throughout the day, she had whispered, wet and panting: “Let's move in together.”  
  
And now they were in front of the apartment with the number **214** written on the door, ready to start a new chapter of their lives. Lexa smiled and, after having kissed her hand, she opened the door, a box still firmly tight under her arm. As they crossed the door, on Clarke's face appeared the same happy spark that exploded on her face the first time she had seen the wooden floors, the bare white walls and the spacious kitchen, at least for Washington standards. The view from the window was not as spectacular as the one from Lexa's penthouse but they could see a small park that gave that touch of green she needed.  
  
Despite that the apartment was much larger than the previous one, Clarke realized that with all the boxes, furniture and personal effects, the space would be reduced very quickly. Once the moving van was completely empty, she and Lexa began to pull out all the basic things: clothes, bathroom accessories, blankets and coffee maker.  
  
“Maybe we should order a pizza.” Lexa said as she finished placing the last of her shirts in the closet. “Even if I'm not very hungry.”  
  
“I'm not hungry either.” Clarke said arranging the boxes in a corner of the room. “Would you give me a hand with this?” she asked.  
  
Lexa joined her quickly and although she was a bit confused, she helped her to place the mattress on the floor, away from the white and completely bare wall. Lexa stared at her trying to figure out her intentions and when Clarke pulled out her colors, palette and brushes from one of the boxes, she chuckled.  
  
“Do not tell me you want to start painting now” she said, amused.  
  
Clarke shook her head. “No, I'm exhausted.” she assured her.  
  
“So, why don’t we begin to assemble the bed?” Lexa asked, tilting her head. “I'm exhausted as hell and I'm looking forward to some rest.”  
  
“To assemble the bed?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
Lexa stared at the abandoned mattress nearby with a bit of concern, Clarke did not really want to sleep on the floor. “You do not really want to...”  
  
The smile Clarke gave her was quite explanatory and before Lexa could even protest, the girl's arms tightened on her neck as her lips found hers in a passionate kiss. Lexa did not care much that the mattress was on the floor, not when Clarke's mouth was kissing every centimeter of her body.  
  
  
The dim light hit the mattress forcing Lexa to toss and turn in bed trying to escape from it and at that point she felt the absence of the arms that had narrowed her during the night. She blinked a few times, realizing that she was alone in bed and this made her frown a bit irritated. It was the first night they were sleeping in their new apartment and instead of waking up next to her girlfriend, she found herself sharing the place with the cold sheets. It was then that she noticed the light of the lamp and a figure standing a few steps from the bed. Lexa was not surprised to see Clarke in front of the wall that was supposed to host their bed, holding a palette and a brush: the thing that left her speechless was that she was holding them completely naked.  
  
“Clarke?” she called with a hoarse voice.  
  
The girl looked at her and a smile full of love came over the spotted colored face. “I did not mean to wake you.” she immediately said guilty, stepping to bed.  
  
Lexa noticed her white skin covered with tempera and seeing how much that image was herotic she could not help but bite her lower lip. She sat up and the sheet sagged on her bare chest, as Lexa ran her eyes on the wall.   
  
“What time is it?”  
  
“Three o'clock.”  
  
“Clarke ...”  
  
“I know, my love, I know.” she replied resting her palette on the floor and kneeling on the mattress. “But I couldn't sleep, I kept playing with your hair and at that point the inspiration caught me, I was not able to ignore it.” she confessed brushing away a lock from her face.  
  
Lexa kissed her palm and sighed, enjoying the comforting warmth of her hand.  
  
“Go back to sleep.” Clarke muttered. “Forgive me for having woken you up.” she continued, leaning to kiss her tenderly.  
  
Lexa shook her head and deepened the kiss. “Make love to me again.” she whispered to her lips. “Make love to me again in our new bed and in our new home.”  
  
Clarke smiled at her and began to kiss her neck softly, grabbing her breasts, leaving a strip of color on the skin. For the rest of the night, Lexa's body was the only thing that she felt the need to paint.

  
****  
  
After nearly three weeks, the boxes, that were scattered everywhere, were almost completely gone and the apartment had begun to take shape. The first thing that was mounted after Clarke had finished painting the wall, was the bedroom, then the living room and after that the guest room.  
  
It was definitely _their_ home.  
  
The routine had caught them almost immediately: they woke up every morning in each other's arms, they took showers - always together - and while Lexa, already dressed for the upcoming day, made coffee, Clarke was organizing her day based on the errands of the gallery. That morning was not different from the usual, except for the fact that Clarke heard swearing - perhaps for the first time in nearly two years - Lexa from the kitchen. She joined her quickly and stood in the doorway, watching her growling something unintelligible under her breath and kicking one of the stools.  
  
“Damn it!” Lexa said, staring at her suit completely covered with coffee. “Shit, shit!” she exclaimed kicking one of Clarke's brushes and inevitably hitting the cabinet.  
  
“I'm sure that the cabinet is completely innocent, my love.” Clarke said from the door.  
  
Lexa jumped at the sound of her voice and sighed heavily. “Clarke, how many times did I beg you not to leave your brushes around?” she said puffing.  
  
“A couple...”  
  
“I almost broke my head!” she said. “To avoid falling I grabbed the counter, poured the coffee on me and the cup ended up in a thousand pieces on the floor!” she explained, as if someone had just dropped a bomb on their heads. “If I'm late, Anya will kill me.”  
  
“I'm sorry.” Clarke said sincerely sorry. “I'll try to be more careful, forgive me.”  
  
“Never mind.” Lexa muttered, pulling off her jacket and starting to unbutton the shirt, then she pulled out her phone from her pocket, probably to warn Anya.  
  
And for some reason, something in Clarke snapped, she knew she wanted that scenario for a lifetime.  
  
_She wanted a grumpy Lexa who wandered for their kitchen cursing for the brushes she left around.  
  
She wanted a Lexa who was returning home from work tired but with a sweet smile and a bouquet of flowers._  
  
_She wanted the evenings spent on the couch, watching Netflix to end up fighting for the remote.  
  
She wanted Lexa to slip into bed in the middle of the night, after she’d returned from a business trip.  
  
She wanted the nights spent making love, when every touch, every breath were never enough.  
  
She wanted everything._  
  
“Lexa?” she murmured softly.  
  
“Hmm?” Lexa answered, looking up.  
  
“Marry me.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	20. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One-year guys ... I hope this chapter helps to make you feel a little bit better

**Chapter 19**

 

 

 _The fingers_ _played_ _quickly_ _the_ _guitar strings and a sweet melody began to sound, caressing the person who held the instrument and all those who were in the room, as she continued to sing._ _  
  
_ _“_ _ **I'm just a singer who already blew his shot, I get along with old timers cause my name's a reminder of a pop song people forgot.”**_ _  
  
_ _She could feel all eyes on her and despite the emotion that_ _had_ _not stopped caressing her throughout the day, she continued playing._ _  
  
_ _“_ _ **And I can't keep a girl, no, cause as soon as the sun comes up, I cut 'em all loose and work's my excuse, but the truth is I can't open up..**_ _.”_ _  
  
Her eyes stared at the figure who sat by her side and_ _she_ _smiled when she saw the blush on her cheeks at her words.  
  
_ _“_ _ **But you don't wanna be high like me, never really knowing why like me, step off that roller coaster, all alone...”**_ _  
  
She_ _kept moving her fingers faster and swaying her head to the music that she was producing._ _  
  
_ _“_ _ **You don't wanna ride the bus like this, trust like this, you don't wanna be stuck up on that stage singing**_ _.”_ _  
  
Her_ _eyes pointed on the people who were staring at her enchanted and this time_ _her_ _cheeks blush_ _ed_ _. The fingers moved faster on the_ _strings_ _and when she prepared to open her mouth_ _to_ _sing the next verse, a sweet voice preceded her._ _  
  
_ _“_ _ **So let it go, so let it be..**_ _.” she sang staring into her eyes. “_ _ **Why you don't be you and I be me.**_ _”_ _  
  
_ _She smiled softly and sighed with happiness when a hot hand reached her cheek, a ring on the left._ _  
  
_ _«_ _ **Everything is wrong... why you don't be you and I be me?”**_ _asked, tilting her head._ _”_ _ **And I be me...”**_ _  
  
_ _The room erupted in applause as soon as their lips met in a gentle kiss._ _She had never thought of being able to experience all_ _that_ _happiness and_ _she_ _was almost certain that by the end of the day, her heart would explode for the multitude of emotions.  
  
_ _Emotions that had appeared that morning.  
  
_ ****  
  
When Clarke had imagined the day of her marriage, she had always planned to walk down the aisle on her father's arm, to see Jake hand over her hand in that of the person that Clarke had decided to spend the rest of her life with. In her mind she had always painted a magnificent ceremony, perhaps a church and both parents crying excited, while her best man smiled encouragingly.  
  
But eight years before a girl came into the diner where she worked and had screwed up all those plans. And despite her arrogance, her green eyes filled with pain and yes, desperation, Clarke had accepted that singular marriage proposal.  
  
She was aware that things between her and Lexa had not gone in the right way.  
  
Clarke knew that Lexa had behaved badly towards her, disappearing for years and not even remembering the name of the woman she had married; she knew that Lexa went to her gallery after six years and began to woo her with the typical arrogance of a rich woman who is used to have everything she wanted. But when she understood that Clarke was not the kind of woman ready to take subdue from that kind of wealth and behavior, she had allowed her to know the real Lexa. They spent some time together, they talked and Clarke had not given anything more than she was willing to give her and Lexa had not pushed to have nothing more than her company.  
  
Only two years earlier she would not even dream of being in a situation like that with anyone, much less with Lexa, but there she was, looking at herself through the large mirror, wearing a simple blue dress that stopped above the knees, with a generous cleavage and her blonde hair fell in curls over her shoulders.  
  
Octavia looked at her and gave her a small smile. “Are you nervous?”  
  
“No, I mean, me and Lexa are already legally married, there is nothing to be nervous about.”  
  
“Mmh...” Octavia murmured. “So what's going on into your head?”  
  
Clarke was silent for a moment, biting her lower lip and trying to clarify her thoughts. There were a lot of things that went through her head: her past, Lexa, her father but most of all her mother... She had always imagined her at her side on that day. Still she remembered her fifth birthday when she and her father had pretended to get married, with her mother celebrating the ceremony with a smile on her lips.  
  
“I'm thinking of my mother.” she said. “I'm thinking of all the steps we should have done together and we lost it.” she explained. “After my father's death everything collapsed like a house of cards but despite what happened to the both of us and the wrong choices that my mother took, I missed her every second.”  
  
Octavia stepped back, freeing her from her attentions and stared at her intently through the mirror, a small smile on the lips. “I'm sure that despite all that has happened, Abby would be very proud of the woman you've become.” she said, taking her hand. “And Jake, I am convinced that he has followed your steps wherever he is and have not stopped thinking: that is my daughter and I am proud of the woman she has become.”  
  
“Octavia...” Clarke murmured with a lump in her throat. “Don't make me drool the makeup, please.”  
  
Her friend chuckled, shaking her head. “No, no, we have no time to fix it, the ceremony will begin in less than half an hour!” she said, clapping her hands. “I'll see if Luna is ready to bring the rings, I'll be back in a heartbeat, can you resist ten minutes without me?”  
  
“See you soon, Octavia.” Clarke said amused.  
  
  
****  
  
Anya had never seen Alexandria Woods so nervous in her life.  
  
She was in charge of one of the strongest companies across America, she was about to open up branches in Europe and she was able to talk to business people and tear them apart with her economic knowledge but the very thought of walking down the aisle in less than forty minutes had turned her into a whimpering mess.  
  
Lexa and Clarke had not seen each other for a day and Anya was beginning to suspect that she was going to have a nervous breakdown, so she watched her from the bench, curiously. When she saw Lexa closing the button of her blue suit, looking in the mirror, shaking her head, opening the button again, repeating the action and connecting it again, Anya knew that it was appropriate to say something, so she stood up and snorted.  
  
“If you do not calm down, I'll tie you up to a chair.” she said with a snarl.  
  
Lexa gave her a distracted gaze and looked back at her reflection in the mirror, straightening her collar and running a hand through her hair.  
  
“Lexa!” she exclaimed.  
  
“I'm sorry, I-”  
  
“Come on, Clarke is going to marry you again, don't you think that all this turmoil is absurd?”  
  
Lexa sighed heavily. “Yesterday I did not see her all day and we barely heard from each other.” Lexa explained. “This has not happened for two years and I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.” she continued. “And what if Clarke does not come? And what if she realized that I'm not worth the effort and-”  
  
“And what if nothing Lexa, that's enough.” Anya said, shaking her head, banishing her from the mirror. “Clarke is crazy about you, I can assure you that she is in the other room getting ready and she cannot wait to renew her vows.”  
  
“I know it's absurd, right?” Lexa said stroking her jacket. “I know she loves me and I know she was the one who asked me to marry her again but there is always a small part inside of me that fears that Clarke might vanish, just like all the other people did in my life...”  
  
Anya squeezed her shoulder lovingly. “Raven and I are still here.” she reminded her. “And despite our bad moments, we are always together and we will not let you go.” she murmured. “And the same applies to Clarke. Damn, Lexa, she's been waiting for you for six years, do you really think she can disappear like this?”  
  
Lexa rubbed a hand over her face and sighed heavily. “I have to see her, even if only for a minute.” she murmured.  
  
“No one's stopping you.” Anya chuckled. “I think you and Clarke have passed all the bad luck in this world and I repeat: you two are already married.”  
  
Lexa started to reply but the soft knock on the door turned her attention and Raven's head appeared from the door with a small smile.  
  
“She's here.” she said simply.  
  
Anya raised an eyebrow in search of explanation but she did not have time to talk, someone grabbed her leg and her eyes pointed on her baby. “Have you been a good boy with mum?” she asked rhetoric.  
  
Anya had not really need to ask him: she knew perfectly well that Mtholephi was one of the most quiet and calm children in the the world. She saw him nodding shyly and she bent over to pick him up in her arms, placing him on her side, carefully avoiding to stain the dress.  
  
“Aunt Lexa is dying of fear at the idea of marrying aunt Clarke, what about kissing her to give her a little courage?” she murmured in her ear.  
  
She took a step towards her friend, who was busy talking to Raven and the boy leaned over to give Lexa a gentle kiss on the cheek.  
  
“Don't be afraid to marry aunt Clarke.” he said in a small voice.  
  
Lexa smiled ruffling his hair with love. “After this kiss I will not be afraid to face anything. I really needed it, thanks a lot, Lephi.”  
  
The boy smiled again and gave her another kiss on the cheek, before Anya put him on the ground so that he could join her wife who was waiting to go into the other room.  
  
“Half an hour.” Raven reminded.  
  
Lexa nodded and settled back her jacket, she only had half an hour and that would be enough.  
  
  
****  
  
  
“God, I missed you to death.” Clarke whispered, kissing her gently. “So much.” she whispered, while her ass banged hard against the table.  
  
“You too.” Lexa whispered holding her face in her hands as to want to ensure that Clarke was there. “You're really here.”  
  
“You doubted?” she chuckled, kissing her jaw. “I am the one who asked you to marry me, Lexa.”  
  
“I know, I know, I am unbear-”   
  
The sentence was cut in half by Clarke's lips who closed on hers, while her hands were going to slip into her hair to keep her closer.  
  
“I love you, soon to be Ms. Griffin-Woods.” Clarke muttered on her lips.  
  
“Technically you already are Mrs. Woods-Griffin.”  
  
“Not even in your wildest dreams your last name will be before mine, Woods.”  
  
Lexa kissed her again, this time with more passion, lifting Clarke to make her sit on the table and when she opened her legs, she quickly settled in the middle. A week passed since the last time they had been intimate: Lexa had deemed it to be a pretty good tradition to wait until the wedding night. Clarke in that moment would have gladly ripped all the buttons of Lexa's shirt careless of the impending ceremony.  
  
“I did not come here for this.” Lexa murmured sucking her bottom lip. “But you're irresistible.” she said, stroking her leg from above the dress.  
  
“We'll be late to the ceremony...” Clarke reminded her, without making a single movement to move away from her touch.  
  
It was a light knock on the door that brought Lexa to the real reason why she had slipped into the room. She gave another little kiss on Clarke's jaw and leaned her forehead against hers, trying to catch her breath.  
  
“For how much I particularly like this activity, it is not the reason why I am here.” she said softly. “There's someone behind that door that really wants to meet you before the ceremony.”  
  
Clarke raised her brows confused. “Someone?”  
  
Lexa walked away a few paces to stare at her intently, before pushing aside a lock of blonde hair behind her ear and smiling at her with love. “Do you trust me?” she asked, stroking her cheek with her thumb.  
  
“Always.” Clarke said.  
  
Lexa helped her to get off the table in order to settle her dress, then she took Clarke's hand and raised it to her lips, before heading to the door.  
  
“Lexa?”   
  
"Trust me." she murmured clenching the handle.  
  
When the door opened, Clarke felt herself beamed up in a blink of an eye to eight years before. She felt her heart jump into her throat, as she stared at the woman in the doorway. A beautiful woman. A blonde middle-aged woman with shining eyes and a braid that fell sprawled across her chest.  
  
“Clarke...” she murmured softly.  
  
“Mom?” she managed to say in a choked voice. Clarke looked at Lexa who had stepped aside, she took a few steps toward her and watched her with shining eyes. “How did you... I cannot believe it ...”  
  
“My parents cannot be here for this great day.” Lexa whispered. “So I thought you would, you know...”  
  
“You found her?”  
  
Lexa nodded slowly. “Maybe I crossed the line but I heard the way you talk about her and I thought-”  
  
“Oh Lexa...” Clarke sighed taking her face into her hands to stop the ocean of words.  
  
She stared at her intently, shining eyes fixed in the green ones and Clarke could not help but kiss her gently, trying to make Lexa understand that even if she was scared, she really appreciated the gesture.  
  
“I love you, thank you, thank you.”   
  
“I love you too...” Lexa murmured rubbing her nose against hers. “Now I leave you to talk to her for a few minutes, I'll wait at the altar.”  
  
Clarke would have given anything so that Lexa could stay with her but she knew she needed to face the whole situation alone and above all, Lexa had to finish preparing the last things.  
  
“Do not make me wait too long.” Lexa murmured, kissing her tenderly.  
  
Finally, Lexa stepped back from her embrace and smiled sweetly, before addressing her attention to the woman who had observed everything in silence.  
  
“Mrs. Griffin, I leave you in good hands, I hope I will be able to exchange a few words with you at the party.” she said, then, after winking at Clarke, Lexa shut the door behind her and the room fell silent.  
  
Clarke continued to stare at the woman with eyes full of tears and in the end the weight of all those years took over. The anger, the pain, the remoteness and loneliness invested her and Clarke shortened the distance that separated her from Abby, gripping the arms around her. She heard Abby sob in her hair, trembling and gasping for breath and Clarke could not avoid letting out a tear when the familiar scent of her mother hit her nose.  
  
“I'm so sorry, baby girl, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.”  
  
Clarke shook her head and tightened her grip, realizing how much she had missed Abby throughout those years. The memories of her childhood and their wonderful relationship resurfaced like a river. When they finally parted, Abby could not help but cup Clarke's face to look at her closely.  
  
“You're beautiful.” she whispered.  
  
Clarke laughed with her eyes still filled with tears. “Probably at the moment I look like a raccoon with my make up smudged all over my face.”  
  
Abby laughed softly and wiped the tears that were still streaming down Clarke’s face. “You're perfect, a perfect bride.” she took a shaky breath. “God, my little girl is getting married and with a woman!”  
  
“Lexa is a wonderful woman.” Clarke said.  
  
“I can tell, we talked a lot on the phone and we had seen each other for lunch a couple of times as she tried to figure out if it was wise to let us meet.” she explained. “I was invited to the wedding at least two weeks ago but I did not give my answer before this morning, so please, do not be angry with her for the short notice.”  
  
Clarke shook her head. “I am not.” she reassured.  
  
“I sought for you so long, Clarke.” Abby confessed. “When I got the call from Lexa, when she told me your name… God, I thought for so long I had lost you forever and I would have never forgiven myself, I-”  
  
“We have both our sins.” Clarke murmured interrupting her.  
  
Abby leaned to take her hands. “When Lexa called me, the first thing I thought was that I wanted to make things right.” she said with an open heart. “When that morning I woke up and you were not in your room, I knew I had reached the bottom, I realized that I was not the mother you needed.”  
  
Clarke looked down: that sentence was an understatement.  
  
Instead of facing with the pain of losing a father and a husband, Abby had simply locked herself in her pain drowning it into a bottle after another. Clarke found herself lose both her parents in a few months and she knew she was a coward for running away rather than fighting but she felt it was the wisest thing to do in that moment.  
  
“I'm sober for almost eight years, Clarke, I have not touched a drop of alcohol since that day.” she confessed.  
  
When she saw that Clarke did not seem willing to answer, as if she was drafting all that information, Abby gripped Clarke’s hands again lovingly and continued.  
  
“Tell me it's not too late to make things right, Clarke, tell me that I can make up for all that has happened... that I have a chance.”  
  
“I ne-need time.” she said simply and proceeded to add another sentence when she saw the flash of pain in her mother’s eyes. “It is too much for one day, Mom.” she explained. “It's my wedding day and up to ten minutes ago I was concentrated on the thought of not tripping over my dress down the aisle... and now this.”  
  
“I understand, I understand perfectly.” Abby reassured her with a small smile. “I just wanted you to know that Lexa arranged my stay for a few days after your honeymoon and that... that I'll be here forever.” she murmured. “I'm not going anywhere, not anymore.”  
  
“Mom...”  
  
The sound of the door opening slightly cut her sentence in half. Adam made his entrance, impeccably dressed and with his usual loving smile on his lips.  
  
“It's time, Miss Griffin.” he said, but when he saw her red eyes, his smile faltered. “Is everything okay?” he asked worried.  
  
Clarke nodded. “Yes, Adam, everything is okay.” she assured him. “Just give me a second to fix the makeup and we can go.”  
  
Before she could make any movement, Abby took her cosmetic bag that had been abandoned on the table and helped her.  
  
“Perfect.” Abby murmured.  
  
Clarke smiled sweetly and turned to the man, his hands behind his back and his usual regal look, he was waiting for her at the door.  
  
“How do I look?” she asked.  
  
“Beautiful, Miss Griffin.” Adam said with a smile. “The most beautiful bride I've ever seen but do not tell Miss Alexandria.” he added, addressing a wink.  
  
Clarke chuckled as she reached him with quick steps but at the same time she was nervous; Adam opened the door and waited until both women were in the hallway before closing it gently.  
  
“Take me to my wife, Adam.” Clarke said taking his arm.  
  
“With great pleasure.” he said.  
  
And before she knew they found themselves in front of the double doors, Adam paused for a second and let Clarke take a deep breath before pushing the doors. The music started immediately and when they crossed the threshold, all the people rose to their feet and they began the advance. Octavia and Anya were already placed on the sides of the two chairs that had been prepared for the brides, ready to act as witnesses of their renewed union. And at the bottom of the aisle there was Lexa, waiting at the altar, with happy smile and bright eyes.They had argued about who of the two should have been found there and Clarke decided it had to be Lexa, because she liked the idea of Lexa waiting at the end of the journey they had so painfully accomplished together. When Adam reached her, he slid Clarke's hand into Lexa’s, before quickly walking away.  
  
“Are you ready?” Lexa asked smiling sweetly.  
  
“It was nice to marry you the first time, I think I could easily do it again.” Clarke responded, making her laugh.  
  
“Ladies and gentlemen, we are here today to celebrate the wonderful union of two remarkable women.” Raven started.  
  
  
****  
  
  
After the promises, the “ _ **I do**_ _ **’s**_ ” and the exchange of the wedding rings, the celebrations were moved to the Wood's backyard, which faced the Alexandria's lake. Everything was completed with the tables for the buffet, alcohol flowed freely and a band had been hired to serve as entertainment. Clarke and Lexa had their first dance as a married couple and they swayed in each other's arms, exchanging little kisses and sweet words.   
  
After various preparations they had decided not to make a big wedding, they limited themselves to invite their nearest people and Lexa's colleagues. The celebrations went on for the whole day and even when the summer sun had set on the horizon, giving way to a slight breeze, the band had continued to play and the people continued to have fun.  
  
Lexa was talking to her uncle Titus and she had left her new bride in her mother's company - they had a lot to recover - while their bast men were grappling with their own children. Actually, Lincoln had been designated as a babysitter for the day and from his position he was watching Luna, Mtholephi and Lethiwe play not far away, while Octavia merrily chatted with some people proudly flaunting the bulge of her belly that indicated the arrival of another child.   
  
Raven and Anya had started to drink at the very moment they had set foot in the garden and had gone on - fully supported by the three Italian that the brides had met in Amsterdam - all day, without missing the opportunity to embark on new betting. First there was the challenge of which of the three girls would be able to earn the attention of the waitress in the least possible time. Emanuela had won in two hours, Emily, had grabbed her head and had smashed her face into the cake she had brought between her legs specifically for that task. This had forced the other four girls to down at least three glasses of wine for losing.

  
Then they counted the number of times Lexa looked at Clarke with heart eyes, when they had come to drink the fourth glass of wine in ten minutes, they came at the conclusion that if they had continued like that, they would have been drunk in half an hour so they gave up.  
  
After the usual dance of couples, who had presented the victorious Emanuela getting cozy with the waitress on the dance floor, the other four girls were found bored to death. At that point Raven had upped the ante, challenging Chiara to approach Clarke’s mom - on which both were not spared with compliments - if Chiara was ready to do it, even arousing Abby's interest, the prize would be great. Chiara would win twenty dollars but Raven would thrown herself fully clothed into the lake, dragging Anya with her. At that that price, Chiara could not resist, and certainly the fact that Abby was a terribly attractive woman had simply played to her advantage.  
  
“I just wanted to give you again my best congratulations, Clarke.” Chiara smiled, once she had reached them.  
  
She gave her and Abby a glass of wine to make a toast, under Raven’s watch who was following her every move. Clarke eagerly took the glass, followed by her mother and with the glasses still tingling they took a long sip of wine.  
  
“I think it’s time for proper introductions.” Clarke said. “Chiara, this is my mother, Abby Griffin, mom, this is Chiara, we met some years ago in Amsterdam, while Lexa and I were on holiday.”  
  
“It’s very nice to meet you, Chiara.” Abby said stretching out a hand to her.   
  
Chiara stayed silent for a moment, checking her mind for a good pick up line between the hundreds she and her friends have tried throughout the years. “Clarke never told me she was related to the Sun.” she finally said with a smile. “Because, let me tell you, Mrs. Griffin, I’m blinded by your beauty.” she lifted Abby’s hand to her lips to seal her statement with a little kiss.  
  
Unprepared to those words, Abby felt her cheeks burn: long time has passed since the last time someone gave her that kind of attention, and even though it was a little awkward to hear them from such a young woman and at her daughter’s wedding on top of all, she couldn't deny to feel flattered.  
  
“What…”  
  
Before Clarke could even understand what was happening she heard Raven’s and Chloe’s laughter and she turned a dark scowl on them. That didn’t seem to affect Chiara, though, seeing Abby’s reddened cheeks she decided to play all her cards.  
  
“I heard you’re a doctor, tell me, how long can a person live without a heart? Because I really think you just stole mine.”  
  
“Oh my God.” Clarke muttered, a hand on her face as she shook her head in disbelief.   
  
She really couldn’t believe that they’ve convinced Chiara to hit on her mother, but when she heard Abby giggle at those lame pick up lines, her eyes popped open in indignation. She rolled her eyes at her mother, who was now having a lively conversation with Chiara, as if her lame approach was actually working and shaking her head again she started to scan the crowd, looking for her wife.  
  
“ _ **Raven! NO!**_ ”  
  
Anya’s voice raised over the buzz of the party and Clarke turned to see the cause of such a roar. She lifted her hand to cover her mouth at the sight of a fully clothed Raven dragging a very shocked Anya to the lake. She couldn't help her laughter when Anya broke the water surface to give Raven a killer look as she dived for her, seeking vengeance. She jumped when two arms sneaked around her and she turned around only to find a mischievous look in Emanuela’s blue eyes.   
  
“No.” she warned as soon as she got her intentions.   
  
Emanuela gave her an amused smile as she nodded in Chloe’s direction, who was running toward them. “As we say in Italy…”   
  
“No! No!” Clarke rebelled.  
  
“Sposa bagnata!” Chloe shouted grabbing her legs to help Emanuela carry her.   
  
“Sposa fortunata!” _*****_ Emanuela finished  the sentence running to the lake.   
  
“Girls, my dre-”  
  
 _ **Splash**_  
  
As she broke the water surface, Clarke was cheered by the guests as the two girls dived into the water near her.  
  
“Best wishes!”  All the people in the water shouted happily.   
  
Clarke raked her hand in her messy hair, trying to regain some composure as she gave Emanuela and Chloe a dark stare while they floated beside her.Her gaze climbed the bank to finally find Lexa near Abby and Chiara. Her cheerful expression that suddenly turned in surprise told her that Chiara was still unashamedly flirting with her mother. But Lexa recovered quickly and gingerly joined the conversation, not even giving a second thought to the fact that her wife had just been thrown into the lake.  
  
Clarke’s eyes reduced to two small fissures as she planned vengeance. She signaled to Chiara, who immediately got her suggestion and blinked her in conspiracy, and Emanuela and Chloe granted her their complicity right after. They got out of the water, climbing the bank to reach the three women, still deep in their conversation; Clarke went right around them, sneaking at Lexa’s back to catch her by surprise and to jump on her back, but just as she was about to do it, Lexa turned to her, placing a hand in front of her face and stopping her jump.  
  
“Don’t even think about it, Woods-Griffin.” she purred, a smug grin playing at the corners of her lips.  
  
“It’s Griffin-Woods, Lexa.” Clarke grumbled, crossing her arms on her chest. “You have to respect the alphabetical order.”   
  
“And hierarchy too!” Anya shouted from the lake, as Raven giggled.   
  
Lexa rolled her eyes at the lawyer’s joke. “So, that's why the two of you have not followed the alphabetical order and call yourselves Reyes-Forrest.” she shouted back.   
  
“Damn right!” Anya proudly answered back, earning a kiss from Raven.   
  
Lexa shook her head, turning her attention back to Clarke. “So, what was your plan?”  
  
“Just wanted to give you a hug… a wet hug.” she smiled, lifting a playful eyebrow.   
  
Lexa giggled, unbuttoning her jacket and turning to Abby as she took it off. “I’m sorry Mrs. Griffin, would you please be so kind to hold it for me?” she asked as Abby took her jacket, she then turned to Clarke, arms opened to let her hide in her hug.  
  
“Brr, you're cold.” she whispered in her ear, giving it a little kiss. “Now tell me what you were really planning to do.”   
  
Clarke’s blue eyes glistened in mischief. “I wanted to throw you into the lake.” she honestly answered.   
  
Lexa’s eyebrows jumped. “And did you really expect to succeed?” she asked, skeptical.   
  
“Nope.” Clarke answered, a dangerous light in her blue irises. “That’s why I called backups…”  
  
Before Lexa’s mind could process her answer, two pairs of hands grabbed her shoulders. She tried to escape, without success as Emanuela and Chloe laughed.  
  
“I’m afraid that the time has come for me to part from your charming presence, Mrs. Griffin.” Chiara sighed, gallantly kissing Abby's hand. “Duty is calling, but your thought will surely keep me warm when I’ll throw myself into the icy waters of the lake.”   
  
Clarke rolled her eyes at that further flirt, finding herself stare in disbelief as Abby left a little kiss on Chiara’s cheek, turning her legs in jello as she approached to help them lift Lexa’s legs.   
  
Even knowing she could never escape, Lexa kept struggling in their hold.  
  
“Lexa, I’m sorry.” Chloe sighed over her left shoulder. “I really didn't-t want to throw you into the lake, but… come on, you know better than me that’s impossible to say no to your wife.”   
  
At those words, Lexa sighed, finally surrendering to her fate and bracing herself for the impact with the water.  
  
The four of the apocalypse, as Lexa had just named them in her mind, stopped on the bank, swinging her sideway and counting to three before letting her fall in the cold water and diving themselves all around her, laughing.   
  
Lexa emerged sputtering and rubbing her eyes to clear her vision. Her breath choked in her throat when she saw Clarke’s happy eyes, but she managed anyway to cross her arms on her chest, rolling her eyes in an exasperated expression that lived only for the time Clarke needed to wrap her arms around her neck and to steal her lips in a sweet kiss.   
  
“Hurray for the brides!” the three Italians shouted with Anya and Raven, showering them in a flood of splashes.

 

**(*It is a typical thing that we say in Italy, and means:** **_Wet bride, lucky bride_ ) **

  
  
****  
  
  
After everyone had left the lake, the celebrations had gone ahead not for long, especially since the children had started to show the first signs of tiredness. After greeting all the guests and giving the necessary directions to Lincoln and Octavia in regard to the alarm - Clarke and Lexa had decided to leave their house, so that all children could spend the night in a known place -, she and Clarke were directed to the hotel that Lexa had booked for the night.  
  
It was a place that faced on the lake and it was not far from the family home, so it was not hard to reach it after the obvious tiredness of the day. When the receptionist had seen how much they were wet, Lexa had been able to see clearly the way the boy was barely restraining to comment their wet clothes. Despite everything the boy had given her the key and so hand in hand, they had reached the elevator, ready to take refuge in silence and in the comfort of their hotel room.   
  
They stopped at the door marked with the number 307 and Lexa put the key in the lock turning the handle. Before Clarke could even take a single step inside, her wife bent down to take her into the arms, allowing both to go through the door as tradition. Clarke smiled at her lovingly, rubbing her nose against hers as a sign of devotion, tears of happiness and love painted in her eyes.  
  
The room was enormous, there was a small living room with a large red leather sofa and a mini bar. The room was equipped with a large bed, which was strewn with flowers, and a large basket with ice and a bottle of champagne had been placed on one of the bedside tables. Lexa led her, still holding Clarke in her arms, to the bedside table, before letting her go and earning a gentle kiss on her lips. Then Lexa unfastened her jacket, pulling it off slowly and leaning it on the edge of the bed, before doing the same with her shirt cuffs, rolling up the sleeves on her elbows. Lexa observed Clarke slowly taking off her earrings, placing them on the large dresser and she reached her, running her hands around her waist and caressing her belly.  
  
“Was the party like you had imagined?” she asked, tenderly kissing Clarke’s neck and inhaling her scent.  
  
Their clothes were still pretty wet from the dip in the lake but despite all of that, Clarke still remained magnificently beautiful.  
  
“It was wonderful.” Clarke muttered, putting her hands on hers, to tighten herself more against her chest.  
  
“Nothing is as wonderful as you are.” her wife whispered with honeyed voice making her giggle.  
  
“Would you like another toast?” Clarke asked with a small smile.  
  
“As if we had not already had enough to drink all day.” she chuckled, watching her melt away from her embrace to reach the table and pour the liquid into two glasses.  
  
They made a little toast and drank as they kept looking into each other’s eyes for a few minutes, until Clarke took the glass away from Lexa's hands and then lean over to kiss her slowly, with sensuality. Lexa melted into that touch, resting her hands on Clarke's waist and squeezing it, letting their lips seek each others.   
  
“Clarke...” she muttered out of breath.” “I love you.”  
  
“I love you too.” Clarke whispered pushing Lexa in the direction of the bed, sucking her lower lip.  
  
When the back of Lexa's knees touched the mattress, she sat down, admiring the wonderful creature that was her wife: with her blonde hair still wet, that fell in small waves on her shoulders, a small and provocative smile drawn into her lips, the blue dress that swathed the curves to perfection... She could not believe she was hers.  
  
“I cannot believe you're mine.” Lexa murmured, staring at her as if she was the only thing that matter in the world.  
  
And for Lexa, she really was.   
  
Clarke was the best thing that had happened in Lexa’s life, she could not believe that she had the privilege of calling Clarke her wife, or of waking up beside her for the rest of her life.  
  
Clarke smiled. “I cannot believe you're mine either.” she replied as she approached the suitcase that Lexa had taken the precaution to put in their room  
  
Lexa looked at her curiously, as Clarke started to dig between their clothes and wondered what she was seeking, so she just stared at her, licking her lips waiting. A week without being able to make love to each other had been a very difficult goal, especially for Clarke but they were both ready to make up for the lost time.   
  
“And you'll be mine all night.” Clarke added, turning to her clutching something in her hands: a CD.  
  
Lexa stared at her confused waiting for an explanation, watching her reach the other bedside table and finally she saw the stereo that was leaning over it. When the melody reached her ears, Lexa smiled recognizing the song.   
  
 **When your baby leaves you all alone and nobody calls you on the phone.  
  
** “ _ **Do not you feel like crying? Do not you feel like crying?**_ ” Clarke sang as she walked toward the bed, her hands searching for the side zipper of her dress.  
  
When she found it, she slipped it, observing her wife, running her tongue over her lips sensually, she smiled when saw Lexa moving uncomfortably on the bed.  
  
“ _ **Well here I am my honey, oh, come on you cry to me.**_ ” Clarke muttered, letting the dress fall to the floor.  
  
Lexa bit her lower lip strongly to that vision: Clarke's body was dressed in a set of blue underwear that held her shape perfectly, the bra lift up her breasts so perfectly that Lexa could not help but sigh full of expectation. Lexa brought down her gaze, along Clarke's bare belly, letting out a little moan when she saw the black stockings tied with a garter belt of the same color of the bra and garter pinned strategically on the thigh.  
  
At the sound of that sensual music, Clarke shortened the distance that separated them, hands dancing on her own belly, so that her wife's eyes remained on her - as if it were possible for Lexa to look somewhere else - then Clarke put a foot on the mattress, on the side of Lexa's body, showing her the white skin of her thigh.  
  
“Take it off.” she said and there was no need to explain what. “With your teeth...” she added.  
  
Lexa did not need to be told twice, she put a hand on Clarke's ankle and went up in a sensual caress along the calf, the thigh and kissed the warm skin before stopping on the fabric for a few seconds. Lexa stuck her hand inside Clarke’s underwear and grabbed a buttock strongly, attracting her closer to her mouth. Lexa from her position aimed her eyes on Clarke's, she grabbed the garter with her teeth, removing it and feeling Clarke's breath labored. When Clarke tried to speak again, Lexa's free hand slipped between her legs, stroking her wet sex.  
  
“Lexa...” she sighed.  
  
That had never been her intent but when Lexa's mouth prepared to reach the hand, Clarke could not help but throw her head back giving her free access. When Lexa's teeth touched her covered clit, Clarke put both her hands in her hair to hold her in that position. She would explain the rules of the game she had in mind after.  
  
  
****  
  
Clarke rolled onto her back, breathless and satisfied for the moment, feeling Lexa’s warm body crawl towards her and her lips rested on her shoulder biting the skin. After the night before, in which Clarke had committed herself to ensure that Lexa barely remembered her own name, Clarke had woken up with the feeling of her wife's tongue passing between her wet folds, giving her a big good morning. After a quick breakfast to regain their strength, they had continued to make love for the rest of the morning, until Lexa had decided to give her some truce, at least for the moment.  
  
“I'm hungry.” she whispered into her neck, biting it tenderly.  
  
“Someone decided to skip lunch.” Clarke pointed out.  
  
“I do not think that someone has complained much about it.” Lexa said resting her chin on Clarke's chest to look into her eyes.  
  
“If you have the intention of keep going on like this all day, Ms. Griffin-Woods, you have to feed me.” Clarke said, amused. “I need to keep me in forces, otherwise my performance will be degraded.”  
  
Lexa laughed amused, kissing her breast. “Your performance would not be poor neither if you did it on purpose.” she assured.  
  
Clarke closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the gentle caresses that her wife was giving her, feeling the cold metal of the wedding ring caress her sweaty skin and she sighed. It was still so unreal to Clarke the thought of calling Lexa her wife, especially after everything that had happened between them.  
  
She knew that after discovering the truth about her, Lexa had probably brought to Clarke’s mind what happened that night of eight years before... well, she had not forgotten anything. Clarke remembered every word, every look, Lexa's eyes full of pain, her own desperation because of all the problems that assailed her life, the constant hunger, the fear to remain without a roof above her head and the desire of any type of human contact.  
  
But there was a phrase Clarke remembered with particular attention: “ _ **Do this for me and if one day you want something with all your heart, I will give it to you, you have my word.**_ ”  
  
She felt Lexa's lips keep venerate her like a rare flower and she sighed full of happiness: eight years ago she would have never thought at such scenario, and now here she was, in a hotel room, the day after their wedding, cuddling with Lexa, after an entire day spent in bed making love with intensity and passion.  
  
“Lexa?” she murmured.  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
“Do you remember the night when we met?” she said, opening her eyes to look at her. “When you tried to convince me to marry you you told me: Do this for me and if one day you want something with all your heart, I will give it to you, you have my word.”   
  
Lexa stood silently and watched her, after finding out the truth, she had relived that moment in her own mind over and over again.   
  
She felt her throat close, so she just nodded. “You have kept those words.” Clarke continued with a small smile. Lexa shook her head, ready to argue, but Clarke interrupted her. “You have.” she assured her. “But... I think there's another thing I want with all my heart.”  
  
“What?” Lexa asked in a small voice. “I promised at the time and I promised yesterday at the ceremony.” she continued. “Anything you want, I'll give it to you.” Clarke's fingers on her lips stopped her words.  
  
“Just one more thing.” Clarke murmured. “I want a family, children.” she stopped when she felt Lexa's breath break. “No-not now, but in the future.” she said stroking her cheek with the thumb. “I want a house with a garden and a swing, a dog, children quarreling on Sunday morning, my mother who spoils them, our children playing with Raven and Anya’s child-”  
  
Clarke did not finish the sentence because she saw tears running freely on Lexa's cheeks, and she found herself swallowing afraid that she might have said something wrong. Maybe Lexa was not that kind of person, maybe she liked children, but only if they were of other people, maybe...  
  
“I'm so sorry, Clarke.” Lexa whispered vulnerable as perhaps Clarke had never seen her.  
  
“Don't be sorry... we don't need to have children if it is not what y-”  
  
Lexa shook her head. “I'm sorry for everything I've done, for pain and for all the years when I was away, and I-”  
  
“Lexa, no, no, love, enough, everything's fine.” she said, sitting composed and reaching out a hand to remove her hair from her face.  
  
“No, everything is not okay.” Lexa said. “I hurt you, I behaved like a selfish bitch and I have no excuses. And Clarke... I spend most of the nights staring at you, wondering when will come the day in which you wake up and realize that I am not what you want.”  
  
Clarke's eyes widened incredulous: she had always thought that the conversation they had in Costia's apartment had helped Lexa to drive away all her demons, but obviously it did not.  
  
“In which you will realize that you do not want to have by your side this selfish woman who practically forced you to spend a week with her because she wanted to get to know you, when you did not want to have anything to do with her.” she continued. “In which you will realize that I'm not what you want, that I'm-” she stopped, as if she needed some time to make clear her own thoughts and Clarke took the pause as an advantage.  
  
Clarke grabbed her face and nailed her gaze to hers, being sucked into those red eyes filled with tears. Lexa was fragile and, despite the wedding, she was terrified of losing her.  
  
“Stop talking nonsense, Lexa, it will never happen.” she assured her. “You're the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you're sweet, kind, caring and I love you more than anything.” she murmured. “I lost myself in you in the very moment you walked into the diner, in the very moment you looked at me with your eyes full of pain and I could no longer live without them.”  
  
Lexa swallowed and her lips started to tremble, only to be stopped by the small kiss that Clarke put on them.  
  
“And you have not forced me to spend the week with you, it was my decision because after all, what I always wanted was to get to know you.” she continued. “And I do not regret it, Lexa, this allowed me to slowly discover what an amazing woman you are, how much love you give to others and I love you.” Clarke murmured, kissing her tears. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” she went on repeating, collecting the salty drops with her lips.  
  
Lexa sighed softly in her arms, letting Clarke Griffin annul her completely with every little touch of her lips and it was in that moment that she knew she was safe. In that moment she realized that she did not care what had been in their past, how much their choices had been difficult and how much they made them suffer in different ways, the only things that mattered in that moment, were the two of them and what they had decided to build.  
  
“I also want children.” Lexa whispered, feeling Clarke's lips reach her. “And the swing and d-dog-”  
  
Clarke hushed her again, pushing her onto the bed and climbing on her body allowing Lexa to hold her. They kissed softly, tears streaming down their faces.  
  
“I love you, Mrs. Griffin-Woods.” Lexa murmured.  
  
And the fact that Lexa had uttered her last name before her own, made it clear to Clarke that she was ready to surrender completely to her feelings, allowing Clarke to take care of her with her love and to protect her.  
  
Just like that night at the diner, Lexa swore to herself to give Clarke all she had: starting from her heart.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is Cry To Me by Solomon Burke from the movie Dirty Dancing 
> 
> We are at the end, missing the epilogue and we're done!
> 
> Let me know your thoughts ;)


	21. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are...

**Epilogue**   
  
  


It was late when Lexa had slipped into the bed, returning from a business trip that had kept her away from home for almost a month and Clarke simply whispered. “Welcome back” with a voice hoarse from sleep.  When she woke up the next morning, her forehead was resting against Lexa's back and she smiled kissing tenderly her backbone. It had been almost a month since they had seen each other and Clarke decided she wanted to enjoy  that moment as long as possible.  
  
Lexa had made land her company in Europe and she was due to go in person to sign the contract to start the branch office, which was  being  launched in Copenhagen in a few weeks. From the few details that Lexa had given her on the phone, the negotiations had gone for long but finally the Woods Corporation had opened the first of many European venues.

 

Clarke would have been lying if she said she wasn't proud of her wife. She gave her another kiss on the back as she assessed the options for the day: it was their anniversary and Lexa had worked so hard to get back in time to celebrate. Clarke had planned the whole day, there were many things that would certainly take away all the stress of that long month. But at that moment Clarke could only think of one way to start their morning, so she slipped her hand casually on Lexa's naked abdomen slowly stroking it. She smiled when her fingers touched the nipple and she felt Lexa move in her sleep, so she leaned tenderly to kiss her neck, inhaling the smell of her hair.  
  
“Hmm...” Lexa murmured still half asleep.  
  
“Good morning and happy anniversary, my love.” Clarke whispered, leaving her abdomen and running along her thigh.  
  
“Good morning to you.” she answered with her voice still hoarse from sleep as she settled better on the pillow. “Happy Anniversary.”  
  
Clarke pushed aside a few hair from her face and kissed her shoulder. “I've got some nice presents for you.” she said.  
  
“Yeah?” Lexa asked, feeling the kiss on her neck and then the kiss on her jaw.  
  
“I want to give you one now.” Clarke muttered.  
  
The hoarse voice of her wife sent a shiver down Lexa's spine so, short of words, she just nodded, feeling Clarke gently bite her shoulder, before placing her on her own back and sitting on her hips. Clarke was beautiful, Lexa thought, her hair messed up for sleep, blue eyes still clouded and sweet smile that was reserved only for her. Lexa quickly ran her hands over Clarke's bare thighs, stroking her with reverence.  
  
“I missed you.” Clarke whispered, stroking her chest.  
  
“You too.” Lexa whispered.  
  
“I'm glad you're back for our anniversary.” Clarke said. "Today will be a long day but it’s worth it, I promise.” she continued resting her fingers on the buttons of Lexa's shirt that she used to wear as pajamas. “Now... do you have any idea of what could be one of your presents?”  
  
Lexa stared at the breathtaking beauty of her wife but when the words reached her brain, she remembered the promise they had made. “I thought we agreed on the policy of no gifts.” Lexa pointed out. “I did not get you anything.”  
  
Clarke began to unbutton the first buttons, perfectly noticing the way Lexa licked her lips and she smiled. “Let's say that this is a special present.” she said. “Are you telling me you don't like it?” she asked, raising an eyebrow and moving her hands away.  
  
Lexa shook her head and ran her fingers along Clarke's bare thighs in a gentle caress. “I like this present.” she asserted, moving her palms up and down on the warm skin.  
  
"Well, my love, if you're a good girl, I can let you play with this present..." Clarke murmured picking up where she left off, making run the fabric over her shoulders, looking at her intently, before getting rid of it quickly.  
  
Lexa stared at her, biting her lower lip, she would have given anything to be able to touch Clarke. God, it has been a month and she could already feel the wetness between her thighs and Clarke had not even touched her... yet.  
  
“Let me help you relax, you've been working so much...” Clarke whispered, bending down to kiss her softly. “You'll be a good girl for me, Lexa?” she asked rhetoric and when she saw Lexa nodding, she kept going on with a smile on her lips. “Well, I promise you it is worth it.” she promised.  
  
She drew a path that went from Lexa’s neck, through the breastbone, stopping on her breasts where she started biting and sucking her nipples. Lexa grabbed the sheets in her hands and she closed her eyes, letting out a little shaky breath. Clarke slid between her legs seeing how Lexa wanted her touch, observing the way in which her folds were already wet and waiting for her attentions.  
  
“Remember: be a good girl.” she kissed her inner thigh seeing the frantic trembling of her legs.  
  
“God, please, Clarke, _please_...” she said, swallowing hard.  
  
Clarke slid a finger inside of her and Lexa moaned, her hips arched and her eyes shut. She had missed making love to her wife and after a month she was sure she would not last long. Clarke bit her skin and when her mouth placed on her clit, which required her attention, Lexa put her hand to her mouth to stifle a scream. Clarke did not remove her finger until Lexa's inner muscles were not relaxed and even when the orgasm began to diminish away, her wife continued to moan softly.  
  
“Happy anniversary, my love.” Clarke murmured going up along her body.  
  
Lexa crooned and closed her mouth with hers, tasting herself on Clarke's lips, putting her fingers in her blonde locks. Clarke smiled and peppered her face with kisses, watching her relax in the bed.  
  
“Rest a little longer, baby.” she suggested. “The others will not be here for at least another three hours.”  
  
Lexa opened one eye and stared at her. “What time is it?” she asked.  
  
“Six o'clock.”  
  
“ _Clarke_.” she moaned burying her head in her neck.  
  
“I wanted to give you one of your present, I could not control myself.” she chuckled when she heard Lexa mumble something incomprehensible and she pulled her face away to kiss her forehead. “Sleep, love, I'll wake you when it's time.”  
  
Lexa sighed softly when Clarke started to caress her, while her eyes slowly closed again.  
  
  
****  
  
  
Lexa could hear her even in her sleep, she heard the footsteps on the stairs even before the hurricane came into the room slamming the door against the wall and throwing herself, without any regard, on the bed beginning to jump and paw.  
  
“Aunt Lexa, wake up!” Lethiwe exclaimed bouncing on the mattress.  
  
Lexa blinked a few times and pressed firmly the sheet on her bare chest, trying to focus on the little girl who was staring at her waiting for something... something she could not remember because of her still clouded mind.  
  
“You promised we'd go to the museum!” she continued placing a small pout.  
  
That same pout that even her mother was not able to resist and Lexa was barely able to resist Clarke's pout, how could she fight those dark eyes and that adorable little face?  
  
“The museum!” Lexa said slapping her forehead. “I almost forgot, I'm so careless!”  
  
“We're still going, right?” the girl asked in a small voice.  
  
“Of course!” Lexa asserted.  
  
“Hurrah!” she exclaimed, coming down from the mattress. “Mom said you had forgotten, I'm going to tell her that aunt Clarke was right!”   
  
And just as she had appeared, the little girl disappeared downstairs, making her sigh of relief. It would have been hard to distract her enough to get her out of the room to allow Lexa to put some clothes on. Lexa leaned over to the nightstand table, opened the drawer grabbing a pair of sweatpants and the Star Wars T-shirt that Clarke had bought her on their first date and she put them on. When she reached the kitchen, the scenario was not something unusual for her: at the stove Clarke prepared pancakes, at the table Raven entertained the twins in a conversation as she waited for Clarke to serve them breakfast and Anya drank her coffee reading her newspaper.  
  
“Good morning, sunshine.” the lawyer greeted her without taking her eyes off the newspaper.  
  
Lexa greeted her with a small groan, because she perfectly well knew that it was Anya that had sent Lethiwe to wake her up that way, so she ignored her completely and bent down to kiss her wife's forehead, she smiled when Clarke passed her a cup of coffee.  
  
“You always know what I need.” she murmured.  
  
Clarke smiled a little mischievous and rubbed her nose against her neck, inhaling Lexa’s scent that she had missed so much. “Pancakes are almost ready.” she said.  
  
"Thank you." she whispered, kissing her nose.  
  
Lexa went to the refrigerator and before she could even open it, she clearly heard the front door open, the thud of a bag that was thrown on the floor and Hassan's voice greeting his teammates. Lexa smiled and after pouring a drop of milk into her coffee, she set the cup on the cabinet. She leaned back against the refrigerator and waited with her arms crossed, it did not take long for the boy to cross the kitchen door, a smile on his lips. From her position Hassan was unable to see her, in fact he reached Clarke to greet her.  
  
“You're making pancakes?!” he asked surprised. “You cannot make them when mom is not here! Now I have to call her and tell her that you broke the Sunday pancakes tradition” he teased, kissing her on the cheek.  
  
“Yeah, call her.” Clarke said giving him a little push.  
  
“I will.” he promised. “Now she'll definitely be sleeping, you know, for th-” and then he stopped, feeling himself observed by someone. He turned around and when his eyes met those green irises, he found himself completely speechless. “Mom?”  
  
“Don’t you give me a hug?” Lexa asked with a raised eyebrow. “I've come all the way here for you and your mother and I do not even deserve a hu-”  
  
Lexa did not finish her sentence, Hassan ran to her and jumped into her arms, just as he had done every time she arrived in his small village in Nigeria. She hugged him, passing a hand in his hair and hearing him sigh of relief.  
  
“You're home...” he murmured. “I missed you so much.”  
  
“I missed you too.” Lexa said. “I would have never been able to miss out on this day, even at the price of getting back on the plane tomorrow.”  
  
Hassan chuckled in her neck and shook his head. “She would have never let you get on that plane.” he said, clearly alluding at Clarke who had just placed a stack of pancakes on a plate.  
  
Lexa nodded and finally released him, taking her cup and motioning toward the table, where Clarke was serving breakfast to the people who were already seated.  
  
“Are you going to greet me boy, or do I have to take the number?” Anya said closing the newspaper.  
  
Hassan smiled and shook his head and bent down to kiss her cheek. “Good morning, Aunt Anya.” he muttered before turning to Raven. “Good morning, Aunt Raven.”  
  
“Good morning, honey.” Raven greeted him.  
  
“Sit down next to me, Hassan!” Lethiwe said.   
  
When all of them took their sit and began to eat, chatting with each other and filling Hassan with questions about his football training and his studies, Lexa stopped a moment to observe her family and a small smile formed on her lips.  
  
She was happy, she would have never wished for nothing more from life.  
  
  
****  
  
  
“It's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.” Lexa said, looking through the glass at the repulsive spider eating a poor and helpless little mouse.  
  
Clarke and Hassan did not seem to feel the same way, they were observing the animal with interest. “I want one.” Clarke said pointing to the glass. “My love...”  
  
“Do not even think about it.” Lexa said. “I do not want that thing in my house.” she said pointing to it.  
  
“Then maybe we should talk again about that dog.” Hassan said with causality, chuckling when he saw Clarke grimace.  
  
“Yeah, maybe we should.” Lexa agreed, smiling when her wife rolled her eyes. “What? A tarantula is fine but a sweet and fluffy little dog isn’t?”   
  
Clarke turned to look at her, crossing the arms over her chest. “You're the one who has always said and I quote: we barely have time for ourselves, who of us would deal with a dog?” she said imitating Lexa. “A tarantula would be in its case and would not bother anyone.”  
  
“As long as you do not find it in your bed.” Lexa said. “The tarantula is out of the question."  
  
“And what about the dog?” Hassan asked.  
  
Lexa put an arm around his shoulders. “The dog is on the negotiating table.”  
  
“Don't even think about it.” Clarke said. “If the tarantula is not on the negotiating table, neither is the do-”   
  
The words were stopped by Lexa’s mouth that rested on hers taking her breath away as Hassan rolled his eyes and walked away. He was happy that his moms were so in love with each other but it often was embarrassing for him to be in the midst of those demonstrations of affection that were so common in the house.  
  
Lexa and Clarke had adopted him after their first year of marriage, when he was already ten years old and he had to accept the evidence of having spent his life in that small village in Nigeria. When the two of them had brought him home, it had taken a while for him to get used to the new life and the idea of having at least two people to care about him. Calling them moms was not difficult, as letting them cuddle him after a long day of school. Lexa and Clarke made sure that nothing was missing and, although the 'tradition' of the Woods family required that they went to a private school, where each member of the family had studied, Lexa had allowed him to choose to attend a public school.  
  
Hassan had never been happier in his entire life, he had finally found a family who loved him unconditionally and when the two of them told him they wanted to try to have a baby, he felt even happier. He could not wait to be able to become the older brother of a nice little brother or sister, but Lexa and Clarke’s efforts had not turned out well, they had assured him that they would not stop trying.  
  
“ _Ahhhhhh_!!!”   
  
Hassan jumped at the sound of the cry coming from behind him and he turned to see Lethiwe and Luna sliding on their stomach across the polished marble of the hall, crossing it at full speed.  
  
“Luna!” Octavia's authoritarian voice echoed in the silence, attracting some looks on them. “Lincoln! I thought you were watching them!” she scolded her husband crossing the arms on her chest.  
  
Lincoln put a hand on the back of her head embarrassed. “I might... accidentally have lost her for a moment?”  
  
Octavia looked at him. “You need to quantify what you mean by a moment.”  
  
“Ehm...” he cleared his throat. “Five... ten minutes?” he said guilty. “Okay, I'm sorry but Raven said they would return as soon as they had finished!” he tried to justify himself.  
  
“Finished to do what?!”   
  
Lincoln opened his mouth to answer and finally Raven came to rescue him, slapping his back as a sign of friendship, as Anya was racing to make up for what her daughter was up to.  
  
“Finished to do whatever they were doing.” Raven said. “Children are like cats, they come back when they stop messing around.”   
  
Mtholephi walked to Hassan, trying to keep himself far away from the troubles that his sister used to do, and took his hand, smiling, happy that it was not him that his mother was angry with.  
  
“Who is ready for the Space Museum?” Lexa said. “I've had enough of seeing that tortured mouse.” she said pointing to the glass.  
  
  
  
“Mom look, I'm touching a piece of the moon!” Mthoephi said excited about what he was doing, making Raven smile while she approached him curiously.  
  
“Oh wow.” she commented impressed. “Can I touch it too?” she asked, earning an affirmative nod.  
  
Lexa smiled seeing the two touch the stone that astronauts had brought from the moon. She sighed with relief when she felt Clarke's arms bind around her waist, pulling her against her chest and kissing her neck softly.  
  
“Thank you for this wonderful day.” Lexa murmured resting her cheek against her temple. “I could not wish for anything else but to spend it with my family, so thank you.”  
  
“Thank you for being able to come back.” Clarke said.  
  
“I would not have missed this day for anything in the world.”  
  
They were silent for a few minutes, watching Raven and Anya read to the twins the captions of the space rockets that filled the room, Octavia in a corner trying to put to sleep Thomas, while Lincoln entertained Luna, who, after her mother scolded her, seemed to have lost interest in anything.  
  
“Mums!” Hassan's voice drew their attention. “You must come and see this! Fast!” he said.  
  
Clarke and Lexa broke the embrace, just to walk hand in the hand, following the boy who, excited, made his way into the crowd. He stopped in front of a Boeing 747.  
  
“You can climb the step ladder and see the flight crew compartment!” he said enthusiastically, lining up with the other people who were waiting to do the same thing.  
  
Lexa smiled and sat just behind him, while Clarke wrapped her arm around Lexa's waist and rested her head on her shoulder, sighing with happiness. “I'd steal that plane just to be able to run away with you on a star and have you for me for a lifetime.” she whispered on her jaw.  
  
“I'm already yours.” Lexa pointed with her heart full of love. “But I will not complain if you want to run away on a star, Ms. Griffin-Woods, just you and me forever, I like how it sounds.”   
  
Clarke sighed again, the love filled her chest and for a moment she felt her eyes growing moist. She was happy, she really was but she felt as if her heart was not ready to contain all that happiness.  
  
“Hey...” Lexa murmured worried. “What's wrong?”  
  
“Nothing.” Clarke reassured her taking her face in her hands. “There is nothing wrong, everything is perfect, Lexa. You, me, Hassan, our family.” she said, pointing to their friends. “Everything is perfect and I’m often afraid that my heart will break for the happiness.”  
  
“Me too.” Lexa murmured. “But then I look back at everything we've been through and I come to the conclusion that we deserve to be happy.”  
  
“I love you, Lexa, you have no idea how much I love you.”  
  
“I love you too.” and then she bent down to kiss her softly.  
  
“Enough! Hurry up!” Hassan said climbing the stairs, eager to see what was hiding behind that scrap metal.  
  
Lexa released her by rubbing her nose against hers and intertwined the fingers with Clarke’s, as they reached the boy. Clarke was right, she could not be happier than this.  
  
  
****  
  
After finishing with the space museum, the three families had a picnic in the National Mall, letting the kids play football, while the adults asked a lot of question to Lexa, curious about her business trip. When the sun had begun to disappear, they went back to the Griffin-Woods’s house, waiting for Abby to join them after her shift at the hospital. And when she arrived, she didn't miss the chance to spoil all children with little presents, so much that Anya had reminded her that maybe she was wrong, that Christmas would not come for at least another four months.  
  
The evening had gone ahead despite Raven had insisted to the point of exhaustion to convince Lexa and Clarke to do a barbecue, earning only negative feedback and glares. Lexa had been forced to buy a new barbecue after Raven had set fire to the previous one in an effort to cook something new. From that moment she had been banned from the kitchen but especially from the barbecue.  
  
They were sitting at the big table in the garden, drinking beer and chatting, while Hassan and Mtholephi were sitting on the rocking chair, reading one of the books that Abby had given him. Thomas walked groping curious on the grass, under the careful supervision of Lincoln, while Luna and Lethiwe were playing with toy swords that their grandmother had brought them. It did not matter that none of the others had a blood relationship with the woman, all of them called her grandmother and Abby could not deny how much this made her immensely happy. She still remembered the first time that Luna had called her that, tears flowed uncontrolled down her cheeks.  
  
“I'm going to take the cake, does anybody want some coffee?” Lexa asked, standing up. “Or something else? Anya? Octavia?”  
  
“For me a coffee, please, Lexa.” Octavia said with a small smile.  
  
“I would not mind a glass of whiskey.” Anya said.  
  
“A brandy.”Raven said raising her hand.  
  
“Abby?” Lexa asked politely. “Can I bring you anything?”  
  
“Coffee will be fine, dear.”  
  
When Lexa began to pick up a couple of dishes, Abby stood up ready to help her, followed by Raven, leaving the other three to linger the rest of the conversation. When Lexa crossed the threshold of the French door leading to the kitchen, Octavia was finally able to ask the question that had harassed all day.  
  
“So, Clarke, do I have to buy the godmother dress or not?” she asked curiously.  
  
“Not even in your greatest fantasies you will be the godmother of any little boy or girl that is in the oven.” Anya said pointing to Clarke's belly.  
  
Clarke smiled slightly and shook her head. “Let's say we'll keep trying. And please do not fight over the issue of the godmother, I think that place is up to my mother” she said. “But I assure you that there will be children for all of you.”  
  
“Are you going to put on a football team, Griffin?”Anya asked, amused.  
  
“Who knows.” she replied with a wink, before standing up. “Now excuse me a moment but, while you two argue about who will be the godmother of my unborn children, I'm going to help my wife in the kitchen.”  
  
But when she reached the kitchen, she kissed Lexa's head and rubbed her nose against hers. “Is there some coffee for me?” she asked with a small pout.  
  
Lexa smiled and kissed her tenderly. “For me, my love, you can have everything you want.” she said in a small whisper.  
  
“You have already given me everything.” she replied. “But some coffee would be appreciated.”   
  
"Coffee coming to my beautiful wife." Lexa granted.  
  
“Smooth.” Clarke chuckled. “I’ll be right back.” she muttered giving her a kiss on the cheek and she walked away.  
  
Lexa watched her disappear and then she turned on the coffee machine, before pulling out the cake, while Abby was putting away the dishes in the dishwasher and Raven was preparing the cups and the glasses of brandy and whiskey. When they returned to the garden, Anya and Octavia were still bickering about the unborn children of Clarke. The discussion was silenced by a roar and the sound of a glass. It was a long moment of silence and then Luna came running, throwing herself into Lincoln's arms, hiding her head in his neck.  
  
“It wasn't me, Daddy!” she said quickly, trying to take shelter from the wrath of her mother.  
  
“LETHI!” Anya yelled, standing up to check on.  
  
“I did not do it on purpose!” she defended herself, when her mother dragged her to the table. “I'm sorry! I swear that I did not do it on purpose!” she repeated, sitting at the table, her head down.  
  
“I'll pay the damages.” Anya said, sitting beside her daughter. “Now you will remain here for the rest of the evening, did I make myself clear?!”  
  
“Don't be so hard on her.” Abby said. “I'm sure it's nothing serious.” when she saw the girl's head lower even further, she was not sure of the truth of those words.  
  
“I don't want to know what happened.” Lexa said. “At least for tonight, we act like nothing has happened, okay?” she said turning to the girl and handing her a piece of cake. “It's okay, baby girl, nothing has happened, right?” she continued with a wink.  
  
Lexa put the cake on all the dishes and a few minutes later Clarke came back with her guitar, sitting back in her chair and placing the instrument on the side of the table. During the four years they had been together, Clarke had taken advantage of the musical skills of her wife, asking her for some guitar lessons, this has happened before Clarke looked for a teacher who could devote to her all his time, which, because of work, Lexa could not give her.  
  
She had become quite good and Lexa loved to hear her play on Sunday afternoon in front of the fireplace in the winter or in the garden in the summer days. According to the rule of “no presents”, Clarke had decided to do something special for her wife, especially considering the important thing that she needed to tell her.  
  
Lexa continued to stare at her curious to know why Clarke had brought her precious guitar in the garden but there was no answer until Clarke asked for more coffee. When Lexa returned with the steaming mug in her hands, she froze seeing Clarke waiting for her, a smile on her lips and the guitar ready to be played. Clarke's fingers began to move on the strings, producing a melody that Lexa knew and she smiled happily.  
  
“ _ **I met you in the dark, you lit me up, you made me feel as though I was enough**_.” she began to sing, looking straight at Lexa.  
  
Lexa blushed at that, remembering the time she had gone out to celebrate a business success with Anya and her colleagues, and she had returned home completely drunk, forcing Clarke to hold her head on the toilet.   
  
“ _ **Then you smiled over your shoulder, for a minute I was stone cold sober, I pulled you closer to my chest and you asked me to stay over, I said, I already told you I think that you should get some rest.**_ ”   
  
Clarke smiled, running her fingers faster on the strings, never taking her eyes off Lexa's, she wanted her wife to understand that those words came straight from her heart.  
  
“ _ **I**_ _ **k**_ _ **new I loved you then but you'd never know**_.” Lexa's gaze became veiled with sadness. “' _ **Cause I played it cool When I was scared of letting go, I Knew I needed you but I never showed, but I wanna stay with you until we're old and grey**_.” Lexa nodded, as if she needed to gave Clarke some kind of confirmation. “ _ **Just say you will not let go, just say you will not let go, Lexa**_.”  
  
Lexa shook her head, putting one hand to her chest, above the heart, moving her lips in a silent: _**never.  
  
**_ _ **"I**_ _ **wake you up with some breakfast in bed, I'll bring you coffee with a kiss on your head.**_ ”  
  
It was something that Clarke did every morning and Lexa loved it.  
  
“ _ **And I'll take the kids to school, wave them goodbye.**_ ”  
  
Clarke's eyes rested on the boy that smiled at her with shining eyes.  
  
“ _ **And I'll thank my lucky stars for that night**_.”  
  
Lexa knew exactly what she was talking about and she thanked that lucky star, the one that had taken her to that diner and to Clarke.  
  
“ _ **When you looked over your shoulder, for a minute, I forget that I'm older. I wanna dance with you right now, oh! And you look as beautiful as ever and I swear that every day you'll get better you make me feel this way somehow**_.”  
  
Clarke shrugged her shoulders, as if she had no idea how Lexa was able to make her so happy just looking at her.  
  
“ _ **I'm so in love with you and I hope you know.**_ ”  
  
Clarke stared at her intently, trying to convey all her feelings but it could not be enough, it could never be enough.  
  
“ _ **Darling, your love is more than worth its weight in gold, we've come to know my dear, look how we've grown.**_ ”  
  
Clarke gestured with her head to the people who were sitting at the table, their family: loud, crazy, but always their family.  
  
“ _ **And I wanna stay with you until we're old and gray, just say you will not let go, just say you will not let go, Lexa.**_ ”  
  
Lexa again shook her head, she would never ever leave her.  
  
“ _ **I wanna live with you even when we're ghosts.**_ ”  
  
Clarke sang with a small smile, her eyes filling with tears, as if they were unable to contain the feeling that snaked inside of her.  
  
“' _ **Cause you were always there for me when I needed you most.**_ ”  
  
And it was true, Lexa had always been her rock and vice versa.  
  
“ _ **I'm gonna love you 'til my lungs give out.” she went on in a broken voice. “I promise till death we part, like in our vows. So I wrote this song for you, now everybody knows.**_ ”  
  
Clarke watched Hassan get up to reach Lexa, taking her free hand in his and squeezing it.  
  
“ _ **That it's just you and me, until we're old and gray, just say you will not let go, just say you will not let go, Lexa..**_.”  
  
The melody went diminishing and one tear escaped on Clarke's cheek. Lexa took a deep breath, ready to talk but her wife let go of her guitar and stood up.  
  
“I think you need to add another circle.” Clarke said in a small voice.  
  
Lexa frowned confused for a moment and when she understood that Clarke was referring to her tattoo, to which she had already added a circle when Hassan had become officially a Griffin-Woods, her breath got caught in her throat.  
  
“I'm pregnant.”  
  
There was a long moment of silence and the cup that Lexa had held between her fingers until then, crashed on the grass, she let go her son's hand and ran to her wife closing her mouth with hers. Tears began to flow down on both faces and Lexa leaned toward Clarke's belly, pulled up her shirt and placed her lips on the bare skin. They had waited so long for that little miracle, they had tried and tried without success, when Clarke had told her on the phone that even the last attempt did not score, Lexa had tried not to think about it, not while she was in Europe at least. Before leaving for Europe, Abby, who had followed the whole process, had suggested to try the conception at home, in their bed, relaxed and especially making love. Clearly the advice had worked.  
  
Clarke was pregnant. She was pregnant with their child...  
  
“Hey, you.” Lexa said to the belly. “You've just made me one of the happiest women in the world, I cannot wait to meet you.” then from her position she looked up and smiled at Clarke, who stroked her head. “I love you, Clarke, I love you so much.”  
  
And if, throughout the day, Lexa had thought she could not be happier, that she could not wish for more in her life, when Hassan’s and Abby's hands reached hers resting on Clarke's belly, she realized she was wrong. She realized that she survived until that moment, she had learned to breathe beside Clarke, she had crossed a tortuous road full of obstacles to get to that: to life. But she would have climbed a hundred mountains, a hundred other challenges to have the privilege to live everything with her. Because for the first time in her life, Alexandria Woods was not surviving, she was living.  
  
And all of this thanks to Clarke Griffin.

  
  
 **The end**  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song in the chapter is Say you won't let go by James Arthur 
> 
> What can I say? Thank you all for following this story, for me it was a great journey and I'm glad I also shared this journey with you all. There will not be a second part of this story, but maybe some shot.  
> Tell me what you like to read and I'll write it for you. I thought of writing the wedding night, but who knows ;)
> 
> I will publish another FanFiction very soon, so stay tuned!!  
> Love you all and thanks again for the the support. You're amazing! 
> 
> See you soon!


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